Chapter Twenty-Four

Serena burned for Gabe. This thing between them was hot and intense and everything she wanted. His mouth between her legs had her rising up and coming before she’d even had time to think. They still had issues between them, but she shoved them back. She didn’t want to think about anything but Gabe—touching her, loving her, possessing her. This was what she wanted. The hunger for him had taken her over. Her doubts, like everything else, would have to wait.

The urge to get closer to him pulsed through her, pushing everything else aside. He dragged his teeth along the top of her leg, and she shuddered.

“More, I want more.”

“I want to give it all to you, Serena.” His voice was ragged against her skin, and it skimmed the raw edges of her nerves.

She shuddered against his mouth and reached for him, pulling him up over her body. “Inside, I need you inside.” She pointed at the bedside table, and he got up, searching for the condoms she’d purchased before coming out to Colorado and unpacked only days ago.

He came back, ripping the foil packet open, and she took the condom from him. She reached for his cock, taking it in her mouth and sucking.

He groaned. “I can’t, Serena. I need you now.”

Desire rolled through her. He needed her so much he couldn’t wait, and suddenly she couldn’t wait either. She pulled her mouth off and rolled the thin material over him, relishing the feel of him tight in her fist.

She lay back and pulled him to her. She ignored the hard floor and that she was still wearing her bra and skirt. She needed him now. He moved over her, his cock brushing her center. Her wolf howled with success. This was it, this was her mate.

He entered her, and they thrust together, building toward total possession. The fever rose up, blurring her vision.

His teeth skimmed her throat, and she came hard, clutching his shoulders.

“Serena, now.” He thrust into her, coming hard. The colors rose up, red and orange swirled into her vision, pulling her down into the vortex of the fever.

But somewhere, behind the drive and desire to have him possess her, no matter how hard she tried to ignore it, was that lingering bit of doubt. Did he really respect who she was? A dreamwalker and not a full shifter? At the last second, she moved. His teeth skimmed off her neck, onto her shoulder, and the Bite missed.

He rolled off, too fast, taking the condom and the feeling of closeness with him. “What the fuck?”

She struggled to think, her brain still a maelstrom of colors and heat. “I’m sorry.”

“Sorry? I thought we were doing this. I thought we were on the same page.” Deep grooves cut into the sides of his mouth, and his eyes were wild with pain.

“I do want this. But we’re moving too fast. The fever is pushing you too hard. You don’t want to be tied to someone who you aren’t a good match for.”

“Are you saying you don’t want me?” His brows shot up in disbelief, and his entire body tensed.

“No, that’s not it.”

“God, I should hope not. Especially after this.” He waved his hand, taking in her position on the floor with her skirt tangled around her waist and her shirt lying in a heap next to the bed. “So what the fuck are you saying?”

“Gabe, we need to talk. Really talk. Without sex and our wolves pushing us to do this too fast.” She took a deep breath. “I barely know you.”

“Screw that!” He pushed up off the floor. “It doesn’t take time to know that what we have is real. I knew it the moment I saw you.”

“But I thought you were Sam.” She followed him to standing and tugged her skirt down, unwilling to be in such a submissive position on the floor anymore.

He flinched. “Is that what this is? Is this about Sam?” He paced the three feet between her bed and the door, looking as if he barely fit the tiny space.

“No, it’s not. It’s really not.”

She couldn’t believe this had happened. She wanted him. She needed him. Inside, her wolf was frantic, trying to get her to submit to Gabe and take the Bite. But she just couldn’t. Not as long as she wasn’t sure what her life with him would be like.

“This is about me, Gabe. And you. And the fact that our bodies, and maybe our wolves, are pushing us faster than we should be going.”

His hands dropped to his sides. “I don’t understand.”

“You told me the day before yesterday that my wolf wasn’t a real wolf.” He opened his mouth as if he were going to say something, but she kept talking. She needed to tell him this or it had all been a waste of time. “I’ve lived with an entire family of shifters treating me differently. Thinking I was built of glass because I didn’t have a physical wolf and not understanding that inside, I’m exactly the same as they are. I’m not mating with someone who’s going to feel that way. I can’t, no matter how much I want to.”

“But I don’t feel that way.” He reached out to her.

She took a step back. “Then why did you say it?” If he touched her—if she let him touch her—she’d give in. And they’d be tied together forever.

She couldn’t have that.

Gabe stared at her, sweat beading up on his forehead. The fever still pulsed within him, driving him to take her and Bite her and make her his. Deep within her, a responding heat pulsed. She needed to go to him. If her wolf could have forced the shift, they would have been running over the hills together twenty minutes earlier. But she still had control. She just wasn’t sure for how much longer.

“I have to go. Whoever it was is gone. Call down to headquarters. They’ll have someone up here in fifteen minutes or less.” He turned and left her bedroom, leaving behind the scent and memory of what they’d just almost had.

“Gabe, we need to talk about this.”

“If I stay, Serena, you won’t have a choice. I’m bigger and stronger and the force of this thing racing through me will push me to Bite you. It’s telling me to make you mine. To take you again, no matter what you want. That once I do, you won’t have the option of leaving me.” His hands fisted at his sides. “I can’t do this right now. I’m hanging on to sanity by a thread.” He turned back and faced her, the strain of his struggle evident in his bunching muscles. “I’m not that man, but the fever will force me past my breaking point. I’m heading down to the ranch. The run should cool me off. If you want me, you can find me there.”

He opened the front door and shifted.

A deep sob rose up in her throat coming out as a howl. She loved him. Oh, God, she loved him. The revelation had her knees going weak, and she grabbed a chair before she sank onto the floor.

How could she feel this strongly, but not be sure she should mate with him? Could the strangling feeling wrapping its fist around her heart really be love? And how could she let him go?

She stumbled to the front window, not sure if she ran to call him back or to catch a last glimpse of him as his gray wolf raced up the hill, leaving her behind.

She loved him, and he didn’t understand her. He might never understand her. Suddenly, it was all too much. She’d thought she could stay here and make this work, but all she wanted to do now was go home to Maine. She’d thought she could make it here, but she was wrong. So wrong.

She picked up the phone and made the phone call to enforcer headquarters. While she waited for the officer to arrive, she got out her laptop and searched for a plane ticket.

As she organized a flight for the following night, Serena found tissues and wiped her cheeks. She hadn’t even realized she had been crying.

Was she running away? Leaving Gabe in the lurch? But if he didn’t respect or understand her, what was the point?

Feeling deflated, like she was making the wrong decision for the right reasons, she finalized her flight and clicked the “confirm payment” button.

It didn’t matter anyway. The flight was booked and the emails sent. By this time tomorrow night, she’d be driving down the dirt road away from the ranch for the very last time.