“One very full glass of wine and a hot green tea with honey, please.”

“Thanks,” I said quietly.

“Sh, sh, sh. Rest that voice,” Lacey said. “Our performance tonight is a big one.”

“Why’s that?” I asked.

“Didn’t I just tell you to rest your voice?”

“Then stop asking me questions,” I said.

“Oh, well that’s not going to happen, so buckle in. It’s important because it’s coming right off the back of your performance at The Met. And that awesome review Blackstone gave you.”

“I still can’t believe he gave me a good review. He never gives good reviews,” I said. “But that was three weeks ago. You think things haven’t died down yet?”

“No. People will be looking forward to your performance at the Peabody tonight. They’re waiting for it.”

“Great. Never too early to start with the worrying,” I said.

“Stop worrying. Rest that voice, do your best, and give it your all like you did three weeks ago. I don’t know where the hell all that spunk came from, but it was your best performance yet.”

“I don’t know. It just sort of… came out. I lost myself in that performance. The stage was massive and I thought it was going to swallow me whole if I didn’t.”

“Then think that way for this performance tonight and you’ll kill it,” she said.

I picked up the tea that was delivered to our table as I relaxed in my seat. I knew I needed to be focused on tonight, but it was hard. Over the past three weeks, Robert had been on my mind. A lot. In my dreams, lingering around the corner, in my thoughts while in the shower. I wondered how he was doing or where he was. I wondered if his work was going well and if he had gone to see another operatic performance. There were so many things I wanted to know about him still. About the mysterious man from my dressing room.

But I didn’t know how to get in contact with him

I didn’t even know if he would want to hear from me if I did.

“Joanna? You okay?” Lacey asked.

“Hmm?” I asked.

“You seem a little distant,” she asked. “You’ve been that way for a couple of weeks now.”

“Just thinking.”

“About what?”

“Things,” I said.

“How wonderful. I can relate to thinking about things,” she said.

“I don’t want to talk about it, Lacey.”

“Is it bad things?”

“Not really,” I said.

“Good things?”

“Lacey, I’m really not in the mood.”

“All you have to do is answer.”

“Or you could stop poking around,” I said.

“What kind of best friend would I be if I stopped poking around in your life?”

“A good one?” I asked with a grin.

“Is it going to distract you from your performance tonight?”

There were times where I zoned out brushing my teeth. So, there was a chance.

“Maybe. I don’t know. It might,” I said.

“Then we can’t have that,” Lacey said. “Spit it out.”

“You’re going to judge me if I do.”

“I promise you there’s nothing you could tell me that is any worse than things I’ve already done with my life. What happened? Did you meet someone?”

“Possibly.”

“Did you kiss someone?” she asked.

“I did.”

“Wait… you kissed someone? When? Where? How have you been keeping this from me? Was that your first kiss?”

“Are you going to slow down so I can talk?” I asked.

“You aren’t talking. You’re staring off into space and gripping a cup of tea way too tight for my liking. Be careful. That thing’s gonna shatter.”

“It happened in New York,” I said.

“I knew it!”

“Knew what?”

“I knew there was a reason you were late after that performance. I was standing at that back door for almost an hour waiting on your ass. And you told me you fell asleep. I didn’t believe that shit for a second.”

“Yes you did. Otherwise you would’ve poked and prodded at dinner that night,” I said.

“Okay, so I fell for it a little bit. But come on, now. Spill. You’ve been holding out on me.”

“It wasn’t just a kiss, for starters.”

I watched Lacey’s eyes narrow as she raked them up and down my body.

“Holy shit.”

“What?” I asked.

“You lost your virginity,” she said.

“How could you possibly know that?”

“I didn’t, but now I do! Joanna, what the fuck!? This is massive. How could you lose your virginity and not tell me? What was his name? What was he like? Joanna, do not tell me you fucked that… critic for a good review.”

“Why are you whispering that? And no, I didn’t screw around with the critic,” I said, mumbling.

“For the record, I whispered for the same reason you mumbled. Now I want all the details. What he looked like. How was he? Did he treat you with respect? What was his name? Did you even get his name? Oh girl, I’ve never fucked a stranger in my dressing room. This is great.”

“Thanks,” I said flatly.

“Oh, no. You’re not getting out of this without telling me every last detail.”

“His name was Robert and he was… different,” I said.

“Different how? Was he the strong, silent type? Or was he all mushy and ‘oh, let me pet your body because you were wonderful tonight and your high notes were glorious’?”

“What kind of fantasies do you have?” I asked.

“Way too many. Don’t make me start asking really embarrassing questions really loudly. Because I will.”

“I have no doubt,” I said with a grin. “It was… different. All of it was different. He was very strong.”

“Oh, did he have chiseled muscles? Throbbing thighs?”

“I… don’t know?” I asked.

“How do you not know?”

“Not many clothes came off.”

I watched Lacey’s lips pucker before she started laughing profusely. People were beginning to stare as my cheeks turned red, and I sipped on my tea as I looked out the window. What was so funny? I didn’t think this was funny. I couldn't get this man off my mind, and here my best friend was laughing at me in the middle of a coffee shop in St. Louis.

“You had a quickie with a stranger in your dressing room, you little minx,” Lacey said.

“Can we stop with this now?” I asked. “People are staring.”

“Okay, okay, okay. Sorry. I’m sorry. Look, did he make you feel good?”

“Very,” I said breathlessly.

“Did he hurt you?” she asked.

“In all the right ways.”

I watched her eyes widen again as I pursed my lips shut.

“I’ll… scoot on by that for now,” Lacey said. “Do you feel like you made a mistake?”

“Not a mistake, really. I do feel… I don’t know. Like I’d enjoy seeing him again.”

“That’s normal, and it’ll fade. But as long as you came away feeling good and don’t feel like it was a mistake, then that’s all you can ask for.”

“I thought it would be more…”

“Romantic? Filled with love? Not a stranger in your dressing room?” she asked.

“You’re a jerk, one. And two, yes. A bit of all of those things. I don’t regret it, but I do feel… different.”

“You gave your virginity away. It’s supposed to feel different.”

“I mean, physically I don’t feel any different. But… I don’t know. I don’t know how to explain it.”

“I get it. Believe it or not, I was a virgin once, too. Gave mine away at fifteen, but still. I felt the same surge of emotions you’ve been trying to wade through by yourself. I’m pissed at you for that, by the way. I could’ve helped you.”

“The downtime between performances helped,” I said. “I got a lot of sleep and gave myself time to wrap my mind around the things that happened.”

“A couple of comments you made make me curious as to what did happen, but we’ll save those for a rainy day.”

“I can’t get my mind off him, Lacey.”

“His dick that big?” she asked with a grin.

“Seriously? No, I mean yes, it was… shit, Lacey!”

“Ha ha! Oh, man. I’m so jealous of you right now. You have no idea.”

“Is it normal to want to know how he’s doing?” I asked. “To wonder what he’s up to and things like that?”

“When you get good dick, yes.”

I rolled my eyes as I brought my tea to my lips.

“Joanna, here’s the truth. A lot of things could be causing that reaction, but yes. It’s normal. You gave your virginity away to a strange man who obviously rocked your socks off. Yes, you’re going to wonder how he’s doing. But it’ll fade. It always does.”

“What if I don’t want it to fade?”

“Don’t tell me you’ve fallen in love with some man you had a quickie with.”

“Not love. Nothing like that. But I do enjoy this feeling. I wonder sometimes if he’s thinking about me like I am about him,” I said.

“The hard truth of the matter is he’s probably not.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Men and women deal with this stuff differently. For men, quickies with strange women are a thing. They do if often, and if they’re hot, they do it very often. With women, it’s different. More intricate and more emotional.”

“You don’t seem to get attached,” I said.

“It takes practice to be like me,” she said with a wink. “Just give it time. It’ll die down, and as time passes he’ll fade into the background and you’ll be okay.”

I cast my gaze back out the window as Robert rolled around in my mind. At least he didn’t have to worry about anything with me. I couldn’t have kids naturally, so the perk to being with me was men could make me their quickie all they wanted. I grimaced at the thought as I took another sip of my tea, watching as people passed by the coffee shop. I wondered what their lives were like. If they were in love or if their hearts were broken. Did they have someone at home who loved them, or did they open their door to an empty apartment? Were they headed to a date or a business meeting? Possibly a bit of both?

“You’re zoning out on me again, Joanna. You okay?” Lacey asked.

“Believe it or not, people can zone out without you interrupting their thoughts,” I said.

“You’re in a fragile emotional state. I want to make sure you’re okay,” she said.

“I’m fine. Seriously.”

“You sure?” she asked.

“For now, yes. But if I’m ever not fine, I’ll come to you.”

“And don’t wait three weeks. That’s a rule, too.”

“I’ll only wait two next time.”

“Good. So, this is our second to last performance.”

“Yep. We’re off to Chicago after this,” I said.

“I love Chicago. That’s where I eventually want to plant my roots. St. Louis is gross. There’s too many people who want to always ask you how you’re doing. People in Chicago mind their own business.”

“St. Louis hasn’t been so bad, but New York will alway have my heart.”

I closed my eyes and sighed as I felt Lacey pan her gaze to me. I could feel her worry radiating against my body and I didn’t have time to try and talk it down. New York had made an impression on me. An impression I couldn't shake. And not because of Robert and our encounter in the room, but because of that performance.

There was something different about that performance. I was more rooted than I’d ever felt before. The way the crowd chanted my name and the way the entire city seemed to envelope me in its embrace.

For the first time in my life, I felt like I was home in that city.

“It felt like home, Lacey. I know what you’re thinking,” I said.

“I’m worried about you, that’s all. You seem… attached.”

“New York made an impression on me, that’s all.”

“You sure it was the city and not the man?”

“Yes,” I said with a sigh. “I’m sure. The Met was the biggest stage I’ve performed on thus far in my career. The crowd, they chanted my name at the end of it all. I wasn’t even the leading soprano.”

“You were one of the leading sopranos,” she said.

“Everything about it was… breathtaking. It felt like the city embraced me. Welcomed me in despite everything that’s happened up until this point. Do you feel like that with Chicago?”

“I like the fact that people keep to themselves in Chicago. And that might be the biggest stage now, but when you perform in Sydney, Australia, your heart will enjoy the outback more.”

“Sydney?” I asked.

“Yeah. Sydney. It’s one of the stops on the European tour.”

“You talk like we’ve been hired for it already.”

“We haven’t, but I know we will be. You’re too good and your name is building in the classical community. They’ll be stupid not to pick you for it,” Lacey said.

“They’re really going to Sydney? How do you know this?”

“I may or may not have flirted with Barry the backstage man a little bit while you were getting stuffed like a Thanksgiving turkey.”

“I hate you,” I said.

“You love me and you know it. Now, what do you say we finish up these drinks, get back to the hotel room, and relax with a movie before this performance?”

“Is a nap considered acceptable?” I asked. “Because I’m exhausted.”

“We can definitely do a nap. Come on. Finish up that tea and let’s go.”

I downed the rest of my drink before I got up and followed Lacey. We stepped out onto the busy sidewalk of St. Louis and people started taking pictures. Lacey linked her arm with mine and started pulling me towards a cab as people called out my name and asked me to smile for a picture. But my mind rushed back to New York City the moment the cab took off from the sidewalk.

New York City, and the man with the steely gray eyes.