CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
The cabin was too warm and sweat beaded at his temple as Boomer stared down at Sidney in amazement. He didn’t just love a woman who didn’t know when to quit, he loved this woman. Yet, after the way he’d treated her, it was almost too much to hope that she still loved him too.
Easing in closer, he couldn’t take his eyes off hers. They were impossibly green, like lush grass on a mountain hillside that made you want to strip off all your clothes and roll around naked. His cock twitched. To hell with the mountain and the lush grass. He just wanted to roll around naked with her. He didn’t care where.
Just when.
Just now.
She licked her lips and said, “Remember all those things you said you wanted to do to me when you were better?”
Suddenly his jeans no longer fit. He swallowed hard and cleared his throat. “How could I forget?”
“Time to put up or shut up.”
He pressed his lips to hers, gentle at first. She traced his lip with her tongue and as soon as he opened for her, she dove in, wrapping her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist. He laughed and stepped back to catch his balance as he palmed her ass and held her tight against him.
“I want you,” he ground out as he buried his face in the crook of her neck and breathed her in—hay and horses and honesty.
When Hank’s truck roared to life, it reminded him it was the middle of the day and his cabin had no lock on the door. She crossed her ankles behind his back and he snagged one of the chairs and shoved it under the doorknob.
Then she thrust her tongue into his mouth and ground her pelvis against him. Suddenly, the bed was too far away. He turned and pressed her back against the door.
He managed to pull back enough to ask, “Was taking you against the door on the list?”
“If it wasn’t, it should’ve been.” She reached a hand down between them and undid his belt and the top button of his jeans.
When she reached her hand into his briefs and grabbed hold of him, he hissed in a breath and rested his forehead on hers. His lungs heaved, but his ribs had finally healed enough and he felt no pain, only pleasure. He rubbed his hands along her firm thighs.
She started stroking him, long and slow and… “You need to stop that. I want to be inside you when I come.”
She released him and tugged off her T-shirt and slipped out of her bra. With Sidney braced firmly against the door, he palmed both breasts, then teased her nipples until they peaked. Unable to resist, he sucked first one and then the other into his mouth, getting lost as he laved and nibbled.
She arched her back. Ran her fingers through his hair. Then eased him away.
“Fuck me, Bryan.” It was a simple whispered command that was easy to understand and impossible to disobey,
God, he loved that word.
His heart kicked against his chest, one hard, rib-cracking thump as he dropped her legs to the floor and quickly stripped her of her boots and jeans. She unbuttoned his shirt. When she fumbled with the last button, he reached down and tore his shirt open. The button popped and dinged against the window before hitting the floor and rolling away.
With his prosthetic, it would take too long to take his jeans off so he pushed his jeans down to his knees and Sidney jumped back into his arms and resettled her legs around his waist. He groaned as her pelvis ground against him. He’d hardly touched her and he was about to explode.
Reaching between them, he rubbed her clit with his finger and slipped his hand farther down. She was already hot and wet for him. His nostrils flared as he caught the scent of her in the air. He plunged a finger in, then two. She strained against him, and her head fell back as her walls clamped down around his fingers.
Then she trapped his head between her hands and forced him to look at her. “Now, Bryan.”
He dropped his head to hers and groaned with the most horrifying thought. “I don’t have any condoms.”
“It’s okay, we’re covered.”
“You’re sure?”
“I’m on the pill. And I had myself tested.” Her cheeks pinked. “Just in case.”
He’d always used protection in the past, and his blood hit a slow, roiling boil at the thought of making love to her without any barriers between them.
“Same here.” He laughed. “The testing, not the birth control.” He poised himself at her entrance and gave her one last out. “You’re sure?”
The pulse pounded at the base of her neck. In answer, she lowered herself onto him until he was buried as deep as he’d ever been. Goose bumps raced across his flesh and the air whooshed from his lungs.
“Holy fuck,” they ground out together.
She smiled.
He laughed. “I think I’m starting to rub off on you. You sure this is such a good idea?”
She kissed him, plucking at his lower lip with her teeth. “Less talk, more fuck.”
“Gladly.”
With his hands on her hips, he nearly pulled out and then drove into her again and again. Her back arched and her nails raked his flesh. Her breath came in soft puffs and pitched moans.
“Faster,” she demanded.
He went faster, harder, deeper, until he felt the tingling at the base of his balls as his climax built. “Touch yourself,” he commanded between harsh breaths.
Her eyes widened, then one hand slipped off his shoulders and down between them. She dropped her head back against the door as she fingered herself and he pounded away.
Then her whole body went rigid and her inner muscles clamped around him, milking him as he moved inside her. Two hard strokes later, he stiffened and poured himself inside her as she slowly came back down.
His legs quaked and their bodies were slick with sweat. Their coupling was fast and hard, which was amazing, but it was also a good thing, because while he’d mostly recovered from his injuries, his strength and stamina were nowhere near where they used to be.
He pulled out and lowered her to the ground, bracing himself with a hand on the door and holding her close with the other. After spending so much time apart, he didn’t want to be any farther away from her than he was at that moment.
Leaning down, he pressed a kiss to her lips.
She smiled and said, “It’s good to have you back.” Then she frowned. “You are back, aren’t you?”
* * * *
Against Sidney’s bare back, the cabin door was smooth and sweaty as Bryan traced a finger along her collarbone. She waited for Bryan to tell her he was back for good. Her heart went into free fall, as if her vital organ had BASE jumped off the Eiffel Tower. Except instead of one of those suits that let you glide safely to the ground, her heart tumbled and cartwheeled as the ground rushed up at a dizzying, death-defying speed.
“Yeah,” he said at last. “I’m back.”
At the last second, a parachute shot out, her heart coasting in for a feather-light landing. She sunk against him, her legs weak with relief as his heart beat strong beneath her ear. Immediately it returned her to that moment with him on the ground, not breathing, his heart thudding weak and discordant in his chest.
Her throat closed and the tears flooded in. “I―I almost lost you.”
Sidney blinked the moisture back as he lifted her chin with a finger.
“Hey, hey.” He leaned in and kissed her. “I’m pretty tough to kill. Have a little faith in your boyfriend.”
She sniffed. “Is that what you are?”
A funny look she couldn’t read flashed across his face. Then he said, “For now. Unless you’d rather tell the town folk I’m your love slave.”
She snorted out a laugh. “Boyfriend works.”
“Suit yourself.” He hitched his pants up over his hips and led her toward his bed. “Though love slave has a decadent ring to it.”
At the bed, he shucked his jeans, briefs, and prosthetic and climbed into the bed and pulled her in with him. “Please tell me you’re off the clock for the day.”
She stretched out beside him, threw a leg over his thigh, and settled her head onto his shoulder. “Finished the last of the touch-up training on the newest five-horse string this morning. Dale has the auction set for Monday morning.”
Over her hip, he traced absentminded circles on her skin. “Good for you. That should give your reputation the shot in the arm it deserves.”
She shrugged. Her reputation was still important to her, but that all-driving need to prove herself to the world had diminished. She had a job she loved, a ranch crew that was becoming her family, and Pepita. That’s what mattered.
And a sex slave. That’s always a plus.
Oblivious to the prattle going on in her head, Bryan said, “Hank told me that because of the publicity from the kidnapping there were a lot of people who showed up for the auction of Rio and the others. Said they brought in more money than they’d ever hoped. Wish I’d have gotten a chance to say goodbye to Donkey, though.” He stared off into space, and even though it was supposed to be a surprise, she hoped Mac wouldn’t be mad at her for what she was about to tell him.
“He’s still here.”
“What? Why? He’s a good little packer. He’s worth his weight in gold.”
“Mac pulled him from the auction to give to you. Said it was getting to be a tradition around here that the neediest stay at the ranch.”
The way Mac had rescued Bryan and her mare, and Sidney had rescued Pepita.
The way he grinned at her made her heart swell, but he said, “She shouldn’t have done that.”
“You’re family to her. She wanted what was best, for you and Donkey.”
He swallowed hard and squeezed her to him. “As tough as she is, Mac’s got a soft heart.”
“And a hard head,” Sidney added.
He kissed her on the end of her nose. “You got that right.”
Without any windows open, the cabin was stuffy. It was summer, after all, in a cabin with no air conditioning. Probably a good thing the windows were closed though, since she might have screamed out a time or two as Bryan took her against the door. Her stomach clenched thinking about it. Her throat was dry from the exertion and the sweat still beaded on her forehead.
Bryan must have read her thoughts because he said, “Thirsty?”
She nodded and started to get up.
“Stay here. Don’t move. I like seeing you like that.”
“Like what?”
“Naked and all mussed up from monkey sex.”
She stretched languorously and he groaned and kissed her a few times and slowly worked his way down between her breasts to her belly button. Before he went any farther, he tore himself away with a groan and crawled over her and slipped on his briefs.
Hopping to the end of the bed, he grabbed the single crutch leaning against the wall and maneuvered around the cabin, sliding open the windows to get a cross breeze. Sidney lay there while the fresh air cooled her skin.
He dug around for some ice, then opened the refrigerator. Something heavy hit the counter. Sidney rolled over and looked his way. He’d pulled out a nearly full bottle of whiskey. She sucked in an audible breath as he stared at the bottle.
Just like that, one moment and her perfectly fragile world spun and tilted and threatened to roll off into the void. She scrambled out of the bed, nearly tripping over his prosthetic and pants laying on the floor. She picked up his jeans, held them in a knotted bunch, and tentatively padded over to him.
“Bryan?”
Glancing up, he refocused on her and rubbed a thumb over the crease between her brows. “Hey, hey, hey…Irish,” he said. “No worries, okay?”
Palming the bottle, he unscrewed the lid and dumped about fifty dollars’ worth of premium Glenmorangie down the drain. Her dad or mom never would have done that.
“That,” she said with a toss of her head toward the bottle, “doesn’t bother you?”
“No.” He said it with finality, a certainty that gave her real hope. “I’m still an alcoholic, still an addict. I still have an addictive personality. I’m not saying there won’t be times when I struggle, because I know they’ll come, but right now, at this moment, I’m good.”
She blew out a breath of relief and he rinsed the remains of the whiskey away and filled the glass with water. She realized for the first time that while he and her parents both suffered from an addiction, he was not like them in any way. While her parents had spiraled out of control until their lives imploded, here was a man who had taken control of his life, of his demons.
And slayed them with a sharp sword of determination and quick, wicked jabs of resolution.
Here was a man worthy of her support, her commitment, and most of all, worthy of her love.
He hugged her to him and she wrapped her arms around his waist as he kissed the top of her head. “Though I’m afraid I’ve traded one addiction for another.”
Sidney’s heart tripped. “What do you mean?”
“I love you. I’m addicted to you,” he said with complete sincerity. “It’s why I walked away from you at the facility. You were like a drug that ran through my veins and all I wanted, all my body craved, was you. I had to prove to myself I could live without you. That I could live with myself with all my flaws and be the man we both need me to be before I could come back to you.”
She stepped closer. “Say that again.”
His eyes widened and he glanced up like he was scanning his memory banks. “Uh, which part?”
“The first part.”
She could hear his gears spinning and almost offered him some lubricant to keep them from seizing up. Then a cog must have slipped into place and he smiled and wrapped an arm around her waist and held her against him. “I love you,” he said.
“I love you, too.”
Standing on her tippy-toes, she brought the kiss to him. Instantly, he deepened it, raking his tongue into her mouth, Sidney tossed his jeans onto the floor and grabbed onto both sides of his face. There was a rattle behind her, like something hitting the floor that wasn’t denim. Bryan froze and color ran up his face.
Sidney glanced behind her. About a foot away from his pants sat a little blue box lying haphazardly on its side. She went to pick it up, but even without a crutch or prosthetic he beat her to it, closing a tight fist around it. He tried to shove it in his pocket, but since he wearing his briefs, he was out of luck. He turned a funny shade of green, like he’d eaten eggs way past their sell-by date.
“Bryan.” Her scalp pricked, feeding off his half-panicked vibe. “What’s that?”
“Nothing.” He dropped the box on the counter like it was a twig or a piece of broken glass he’d found on the floor.
“Must be a fancy nothing for it to be sitting in a velvet box.”
“Yeah, well…” He blew out a breath and ran a hand through his hair. His eyes darted to the door like he was contemplating running, but without his prosthetic, or his pants, it didn’t look like a viable option. Instead, he reached up, cupped her cheek, and ran a thumb across her bottom lip.
She nipped the pad of his thumb and he jerked his hand away with a squawk of protest.
“Quit stalling,” she said.
He was making her nervous, and she was starting to wish the damn thing had stayed in his pocket. Had he gotten her earrings? That didn’t make sense. Her ears weren’t even pierced.
Sometimes guys aren’t very observant, Practical Sidney said.
You can always get your ears pierced, Impractical Sidney added. Especially if they’re diamond earrings.
Yeah, Practical Sidney said with an exaggerated eye roll, I hear diamonds are the height of fashion when training mustangs these days.
Sidney clamped a mental hand over both their mouths and raised a brow at Bryan. Without taking his eyes off her, he snagged the box off the counter and turned it toward her and opened it. His eyes were so intense, so clear, she couldn’t look away.
Then he said, “Irish, will you marry me?”
The breath whooshed from her lungs. She closed her hand over his, forcing the box closed with a snap without even looking at it. Her heart stopped beating and all the blood drained from her brain and all she could think to say was, “Are you crazy?”
“All the doctors say no.” He smiled and gathered both of her hands in his. “For the first time in a very long time I’m thinking clearly. I love you, Sidney. I want you in my life forever.”
Her mouth opened and closed. No words came out. Then an errant red blood cell must have made a wrong turn and ended up in her brain because she said, “You can’t ask me that. I’m naked.”
With an effort, he retrieved his T-shirt and tugged it on over her head. “Now will you marry me?”
“I can’t just marry you.”
“Why? You already married?”
“No.”
“Legally separated?”
“No.”
“In a relationship with another man?”
“No?”
“…or woman?” His smile was sly.
She rolled her eyes. “Of course not.”
“Then since you seem to be unattached, I don’t see the problem.”
“It’s just that…that…” Then her heart kicked back in and put a rush order on blood to the brain. Her stomach dropped two and a half floors when she realized the problem. “Pepita,” she managed.
Bryan leaned back against the counter and crossed his arms over his chest. “What does Pepita have to do with anything?”
On wobbly legs, Sidney collected the official paperwork from out of her suitcase and handed them to him.
He flipped through the pages forwards and back. “What are these?”
“With Sheriff St. John’s help, I was able to get emergency status as a foster parent while they search for her family. I filed paperwork to be a permanent foster.”
“What if they can’t find her family?”
“Then I’m going to petition for adoption. I’ve had her a few months, but she’s already so much a part of my life. I love her. I can’t give her up.”
“No one’s asking you to.”
“What are you saying?”
“I’m a sucker for a good two-for-one special.”
She blinked at him. Once. Twice. Three times. “Wait, you’re serious.”
He dropped the papers on the counter, then pulled her into him. “If it works out, and I hope for all our sakes it does, then I’d be honored to call Pepita my daughter.”
Her heart skipped through her chest like a five-year-old on the way to the circus. She ran her fingers through her hair to re-spike it, then ran her hands over the T-shirt to smooth out the worst of the wrinkles.
“Okay,” she said when she was ready. “Ask me again.”
He chuckled. “What?”
She grabbed the ring box off the counter and placed it in his hand. She couldn’t help the foolish smile on her face when she looked back up at him. “Ask me again.”
He opened the box toward him, then slowly turned it around. She gasped at the platinum band wrapped with diamonds. He plucked it from the satin pillow. “I had it specially made so that all the diamonds lay flat, nothing sticking up, no prongs to get caught, so you can wear it every day and not have to worry you’ll damage it.” Her hands trembled as he slipped it onto her ring finger and said again, “Sidney, will you marry me?”
She beamed up at him and watched as the light reflected in his eyes. “Yes. Yes, I’ll marry you.”
A large smile flashed across his face as he ducked his head and kissed her lips with a tenderness that shocked her. Then he planted his hands on her hips, boosted her onto the counter, and settled between her legs. He grabbed her rear and snugged her tightly against his arousal.
Her breath caught as he sucked at a breast through the thin cotton. “Not much privacy in the cabin for us and a ten-year-old.”
He nipped at the other breast and watched as it peaked beneath the fabric. “I’ll add a room. No, make that two. On opposite sides of the cabin,” he added. “You get kind of vocal when you come.”
She whacked his shoulder and laughed. “Do not.”
“Do too.” He pulled a face, feigning hurt. “I can prove it.”
Sidney leaned forward and practically purred in his ear. “I’d like to see you try.”
With a mischievous glint in his eyes, Bryan let his hands rove up her thighs and under the hem of her shirt. “Gladly.”