Gabe stood by helplessly as Livvy’s second round of treatment began. With an awful sense of foreboding, he watched as the hideous bright-red poison slowly dripped into her veins. Anger bubbled up inside him. Why her? When the doctor had given them both the bad news, he’d watched the light go out in her eyes, and it had scared the hell out of him. He needed her to fight this thing with everything she had, but with the amount of trauma that her body had already been through, he couldn’t blame her for thinking she couldn’t go on.

He’d called Ches, who said she would jump on the next plane over. She should arrive in the next few hours. He’d heard the fear in her voice when he gave her the news, but it had been the call to John that had broken Gabe’s heart. Still too ill to travel, John had sobbed into the phone, and it had taken all Gabe had to hold it together. As soon as he’d hung up, he’d been unable to hold back his own tears.

They’d given Liv a permanent IV this time so they didn’t have to keep stabbing her with needles to get the drugs in. It didn’t take long for the sickness to start, but this time, the nausea was accompanied by sweats and chills. Gabe spent his time either covering her with extra blankets or turning the air conditioner up. By the time Ches arrived, Livvy was out of it. Gabe wasn’t sure whether she’d fallen asleep or her body had simply shut down, but Ches’s gasp of horror as she stood over the bed was like a knife to his chest.

“Jesus, Gabe, look at her. And this is how many of round two?”

“One,” he answered flatly.

“Fuck. How can her body take any more?”

Gabe clenched his jaw. “Not helping, Ches.”

“Shit, I’m sorry.” She gave him a hug and pulled up a chair. “It’s the shock, you know.”

You don’t have to tell me.

“How’s Sophia?”

He smiled. “Wonderful. She changes every day.” His smile fell then. “I think that’s what Liv has taken the hardest. Not being able to hold Sophia or touch her for six weeks.”

Ches nodded. “I can imagine. And you, how are you holding up?”

Gabe rubbed a weary hand over his face. “I’m not. When she’s awake, I manage to hold it together, to put on a brave face for her, but when she’s asleep like now…” He swallowed past an enormous lump in his throat. “I’m terrified, Ches.”

“Now you listen to me.” She shook his arm. “Livvy might look slight, but she has the most immense inner strength I’ve ever seen. How many women do you know who could cope with everything she has and not only still be here fighting but have their sanity intact? She will come through this. You have to believe that.”

“I want to, but I’m so damned scared.” His voice broke. “We haven’t had enough time.”

Ches’s arms came around him, and the two of them sat in silence and hugged.

* * *

By week four, Livvy had lost so much weight, her bones were visible through her nightgown. Her immune system was at an all-time low, and as if her ravaged body hadn’t been through enough, she’d caught pneumonia. She also began hallucinating and muttering all sorts of crazy stuff. Even the occasional visit from Sophia in which his mom would hold her up for Livvy to see didn’t seem to brighten her spirits.

When the cold made her body wrack with shivers, Gabe climbed in beside her and wrapped his arms around her painfully thin frame as he tried desperately to give her some of his warmth. When her body would burn up, he would turn the air conditioner to high and press cold towels against her face and neck.

After the fifth session, Livvy regained some of her strength. The pneumonia had receded, and she begged to see Sophia. When his mom held her up to the window and Livvy saw that she’d sprung her first tooth, she began to sob.

“When did that happen?” she asked. But before he could answer, her crying grew. “I want to hold her. She needs me.”

Gabe moved to sit on the edge of the bed. “Liv, God, please don’t cry. I can’t stand it.” Despite trying to be strong for her, Gabe couldn’t hold in his sorrow. As he wrapped Livvy in his arms, desperate to give her what little comfort he could, their daughter continued to smile her toothy grin at them both.

“I’m missing everything,” Livvy said between hiccups as she tried to get a hold of her emotions. “And so are you. It isn’t supposed to be like this. We should be having the time of our lives, bringing up our daughter together. It isn’t fair.”

Gabe couldn’t find the words to console her, because whatever he said would be cold comfort to a woman who’d suffered more than anyone ever should. She shoved him in the chest and turned on her side. He knew her rejection of him wasn’t personal, but it hurt like hell all the same. He looked over at his mother and shrugged. Heather’s face crumpled. She mouthed, “We’ll come back later,” before disappearing with Sophia.

Livvy was right. She wasn’t the only one missing out. They both were, and despite all the videos and journals, nothing would ever make up for the missed weeks and months with their firstborn.

When Ches returned from the cafeteria with a couple of coffees, she took one look at Livvy’s curved frame and flashed a confused look at Gabe.

He shook his head and whispered, “Tell you later.”

Over the next week, Livvy sank into a deep depression. She lay in bed, listless, barely uttering a word, and she wouldn’t look at any photographs of Sophia. Even when the doctors set up her last bout of chemotherapy, not a flicker of emotion crossed her face. If her eyes weren’t open, Gabe would swear she was comatose.

His heart grew so many cracks, he wasn’t sure what was holding it together. He sensed his grip on his wife loosening, and no matter how hard he tried to hang on, it was as though his fingers were being pried away until eventually he would have no choice but to let go.

* * *

“She’s no better, is she?”

Their nurse, Michelle, who Gabe had gotten to know really well, shook her head sadly. “I’m afraid not. The cancer has stopped growing, which is good, but until she regains some strength, we can’t risk giving her another course of chemo.”

“What can I do?” Gabe’s voice was barely above a whisper.

“Exactly what you’re doing. Keep talking to her. Tell her what’s going on at home. Talk about how Sophia’s doing. Give her something to fight for.”

Gabe nodded. “I can do that. But is there anything else I should be doing? I’ll do whatever is necessary.”

Michelle patted his shoulder. “Pray.”

* * *

The pneumonia returned with a vengeance, and Livvy slipped into a coma. No matter what her doctors did, it was as though her body had simply given up. Gabe spent his days by his wife’s bedside and his evenings with his daughter so she wouldn’t forget who he was. Then he would return to the hospital to sleep beside Livvy. At least he didn’t have to worry about work. His deputy CEO had stepped up to the plate superbly. He only bothered Gabe when he had absolutely no other choice, which meant Gabe could focus all his attention on his family.

“How is she today?” Ches asked as she arrived holding a much-needed coffee.

He took it from her and gave her a grateful smile. “No change. Is John on his way?”

After Gabe had told John how bad Livvy had gotten, he’d begged his doctors to allow him to fly. They’d relented when Gabe offered his private jet and hired a doctor to accompany John back to the States. Whatever it took, Gabe would do. Livvy needed all those she loved around her.

“Yes. He’ll be here this afternoon. I’ll pick him up from the airport and bring him straight here.” She tilted her head to the side. “Do you want to go home and take a shower or something, Gabe? You look awful.”

He shook his head vigorously. “No, I’m not leaving her. What if she wakes, and I’m not here?”

“At least get something to eat.”

He gave her another headshake. “I’m not hungry.”

He shuffled his chair forward and gripped Livvy’s hand.

Please wake up, Liv. I need you.

* * *

“John.” Gabe rose from his chair and shook John’s hand. “I’m so glad you could make it. How was the flight? Are you okay?”

“I’m doing all right. Still popping the pills.” He gave a wan smile. “Thank you for sending your plane. I hated not being able to be here for Livvy.”

John pulled up a chair, took Liv’s hand, and pressed it to his cheek. “Oh, Livvy. What’s going on? Come on now, stop all this nonsense. You have a beautiful little girl at home who needs you. Come on back to us. Please, Livvy. I can’t lose you too. ”

John’s voice cracked, and another splinter appeared in Gabe’s heart. Livvy would leave so many heartbroken people behind if the worst happened.

Ches must have noticed that Gabe was close to losing it because she put her arms around his shoulders and whispered, “You don’t have to hide it from us. We’re your family.”

A sob caught in his throat. “I don’t know what to do. I can’t live without her.”

John nodded. “I know what you mean, son. I thought the same when Beth died, but life goes on. You have an amazing daughter who loves and needs you. Whatever happens, you have to go on, find a way through. But let’s not think such terrible thoughts. She’s a tough one, our Liv. Always has been. She’s in there, fighting her way back to you, and if there is any way she can make it, she will.”

It was the longest speech Gabe had ever heard John make, and he found comfort in the man’s words. He swiped a hand across his eyes and vowed to drag Livvy back to health if it was the last thing he did.

* * *

“You look a lot better, Gabe.”

Ches had finally convinced him to take a quick shower and had brought him a change of clothes. He’d also eaten a quick snack in the cafeteria, but he hadn’t wanted to be away from Liv for too long.

“I feel it. Any change?”

“You’ve only been gone ten minutes. No change, but she’s not any worse, either. Remember that.”

He slumped into the familiar chair by Livvy’s bed and took her cold, skinny hand in his. He rubbed his thumb over her knuckles. “Where’s John?”

Ches grinned. “Heather brought Sophia by, and John couldn’t resist. They’ve taken her for a walk in the gardens.”

At the mention of his daughter, Gabe smiled. He missed her terribly. He hoped it wouldn’t affect her too much having both her parents missing at such an important stage in her life. But what else could he do? He had to be around for Livvy. At that moment, she needed him more.

Gave felt a slight pressure on his hand. He thought he’d imagined it, but then it came again. Hope spiked within him. “Livvy? Was that you? Did you squeeze my hand? Try again, Liv, please.”

Ches’s head twisted around. “Are you sure?”

“I think so. I definitely felt a change in pressure. Come on, Liv. Do it again.”

He felt another squeeze, barely there but real. Then her eyes flickered open.

“Christ, she’s awake. Ches, go get the nurse and get John and my mom. Livvy, can you hear me, darlin’?”

She gave a brief twitch of her head and whispered one word. “Yes.”

“Oh, Livvy. You’ve had us so worried.”

The nurse rushed into the room, Ches following on her heels. She checked Livvy’s vitals and called for the doctor.

“Gabe,” Livvy croaked. “I can’t see you.”

He leaned over her, making sure his face was directly in front of hers. “I’m right here, darlin’.”

“I don’t feel well.”

“I’m not surprised. You’ve been out of it for weeks. Take it easy, okay? The doctor is on her way.”

Livvy blinked several times, then her breathing became labored. Her mouth fell open, and beads of sweat broke out over her face. Her chest rose and fell in an unnatural rhythm.

“What’s going on?” Gabe’s voice was panicked, frantic. “What’s happening?”

“Step aside, Gabe. Quickly.” The nurse shoved him out of the way and pressed a buzzer over Livvy’s bed. An alarm sounded, and a team of people streamed in. A bag was put over Livvy’s nose and mouth, and a doctor leaned over her and began chest compressions.

Gabe’s legs trembled, and he clung to the back of a chair as he stood helplessly by, watching his wife lose her valiant fight. He shoved a fist in his mouth to hold back an imminent scream.

Then he heard Ches shout, “Do something!”