I gripped my gun tightly in my hand as I walked along the edge of the shadows, wondering if my eyes had played tricks on me. I had seen the small shadow on the screen not far from the trash can we all had been watching, and for a moment, I had thought I had willed that shadow there. We all wanted to find Amelia, and it was possible that my mind was searching desperately for anything to help find her and bring her home safe. Without her, I didn’t think Benji would survive.

But for now, I was wondering if I had seen anything at all. I had inserted myself into this investigation, and so far, no one had attempted to pull rank and pull me from the case. I was going to ride it for as long as I could and hope that it would have a good outcome. I would deal with any circumstances around my career later on. I really didn’t care as long as Amelia was back where she belonged. At the moment, that was all I could think about. I needed to find her.

Clearing the next alley, I blew out a breath as I saw nothing but a trash can in the alleyway. In my plain clothes, I looked nothing like a cop and more like a crazed woman with a gun in my hands. That was enough to get me shot. Thank goodness I had decided to put on my vest before climbing into that van today. That was one thing I refused to go into the field without. Now, though, I could feel its heaviness as it pressed against my chest, constricting my breathing and causing me to sweat profusely under my shirt. It was a hassle to wear one, but it could very well save my life one day.

Inching toward the second alley, my heart stopped in my throat as I saw a red shoe peeking out from the corner. No way. They wouldn’t be that stupid to do that. Amelia had been wearing red shoes when I had seen her earlier in the day. What if she was? No, I refused to think about that.

Right as I got up to the corner, Amelia’s chubby face peeked around the corner, her expression happy as she saw me. “Oh my god,” I breathed, bending down to pick up the child. A quick assessment told me she was unharmed, smelling like baby powder and something sweet. “Are you okay sweetie?”

She made a sound, and I blew out a breath, holding her close to me. We had found her. I couldn’t believe it had been that easy. Something was up. It was never that easy, but I was going to get her to safety nevertheless and try to figure it out later on.

“Danielle!”

I looked up to see Benji running my way, giving him a tremendous smile as I showed him Amelia in my arms. “I got her!”

He continued to run, the look of panic on his face as a shot rang out, shattering the still evening. I froze, shielding Amelia with my arms as I waited for the blow of the bullet. Benji stopped within inches of Amelia and me before he went down onto the pavement, Amelia crying in my arms and squirming to get to her daddy now that she had seen him. “Benji?” I asked, hurrying over to him with his daughter in my arms, my heart in my throat when he didn’t respond. “Benji!”

A cop in their blues rushed toward me, his gun drawn and I handed off Amelia as I dropped to the pavement, my hands frantically attempting to find the bullet wound on Benji’s body. His shirt was starting to turn dark, and I felt the warmth of the blood on my hands. “Benji, oh dear god.” He had been shot. He couldn’t be shot. It was me, the cop, who was supposed to take a bullet, not Benji. Why had he run out? Why hadn’t he just stayed where he was safe?

His eyes fluttered but didn’t open as I finally found the source of his bleeding, pressing my hands against it to stop the flow. There was a hole near his shoulder, and I didn’t know if the bullet was still lodged on the inside or if was a clean shot but it didn’t matter. Benji was bleeding, and I was struggling to stop it. “Hang on love. I got Amelia. She is safe, and she wants her daddy. You have got to hang on.”

“Parkman, what the hell?”

I looked up, tears streaming down my face as Henderson dropped next to Benji, his hands pressing against mine as he realized what I was doing. “He’s hit. We need to call for an ambulance.”

“Already on their way,” he said briskly, worry on his face. “What, how did you know she was there?”

“I-I don’t know,” I said anxiously, my eyes only on Benji, the worry really starting to set in as the blood started to stain our hands. Benji was also starting to turn pale, his breathing shallow and my heart lodged in my throat at the thought of what could happen on this street. I couldn’t lose him. I wouldn’t let him die on me. We had just found each other. “Come on Benji. Stay with me, love.”

It wasn’t but a few seconds before the paramedics took over, having to pry my hands away from his body and forcing me back so they could get to work on him. I stared at my bloody hands, trembling now as I watched them work, helpless. Henderson draped his jacket over my shoulders, and I realized that I was trembling, not from the cold but from the worry of what was going to happen to Benji. What if he died? Amelia couldn’t lose two parents. She couldn’t lose her daddy, and I couldn’t lose the man I loved. He was strong. He would make it.

“He is strong,” Henderson stated, making me realize I had just spoken the words aloud. “He’s going to make it Parkman, especially since he has you in his corner.”

When they loaded him into the ambulance, I climbed in, daring anyone to question me for doing so. I wasn’t about to let him die on me on his way to the hospital. The paramedic just handed me a wet cloth to wipe my hands, monitoring Benji’s vitals and starting the IV that would keep him alive until we could get some blood in him. Henderson climbed in as well, and we were off, the ambulance speeding toward the hospital, but I was vaguely aware of the ambulance even moving, not sure what to do or say. I took Benji’s cold hand in my own, holding it up to my cheek to warm it so that he knew I was there. “Please,” I said, tears streaming down my cheeks. “Don’t let him die. I’ll never ask you for anything ever again if you save him for me. I love him so much.”

Henderson’s hand touched my shoulder comfortingly. “He’s gonna pull through, don’t you worry.”

I looked up at the detective. “I, I just left Amelia. Will you see to her?”

He gave me a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Amelia’s safe. I turned her over to one of the detectives I trust. She’s going to take her to Hannah until we can get the right people to interview her.”

I nodded, wiping away the tears as I looked down at Benji. At least she was safe and taken care of. I would be hugging her to death later on, but right now, her daddy really needed me more. “Why did he do that? Why did he jump in front of that bullet?”

“If he hadn’t, you and Amelia would be dead.”

My head shot up, and I looked at Henderson. “What?”

Henderson swallowed hard as he looked down at Benji. “He overheard the police chatter, and I think he realized what was going to happen as soon as we saw you find her. I don’t know how he knew, but he shot out of the van like he was on fire. If he hadn’t, you or Amelia would be dead.” I felt the new wave of tears start to flow down my cheeks, unable to believe that he had done that. He had saved my life and that of his daughter’s. It was the ultimate sacrifice.

The ride to the hospital was short, and before I knew it, they were wheeling him to surgery, leaving Henderson and me at the door, unable to go any further. I turned, and Henderson took me into his arms, awkwardly patting my back as I cried on his shoulder. “He’s going to be okay. He’s a tough son of a bitch.”

I couldn’t get the words to form on my tongue. Benji had to be okay. He had no other choice. If he died, I didn’t know what I would do.

* * *

Hours later, we all waited in the surgical waiting room, anxious to hear how the surgery went. Tony and Hannah sat across from me, the expressions on their faces scared me somewhat as if they expected the worst news. Amelia was amazingly unharmed, having checked out fine during her physical exam. No trauma that they could see. Now she was in the safe hands of Henderson’s wife, who had offered to watch the little one since everyone close to Benji was in the waiting room presently.

Paul and Sarah huddled in another corner, Paul’s stern expression the stuff of nightmares. Travis and his wife Julia were in the other corner, all somber in the fact that it had been hours and we still hadn’t heard a word. I couldn’t believe when they all filed into the waiting room, giving me hugs even though they barely knew me and keeping me company during this long process. Benji had some great friends, and I hoped to God that I could tell him just that.

“I can’t fucking wait any longer,” Travis finally said, throwing his paper coffee cup in the trash as he stood. He had just sat down a few minutes before that when Julia had told him that his pacing was making her dizzy. Clearly, Travis wasn’t used to any kind of waiting. “They have to tell us something.”

“No news is good news Sweetheart,” Julia said, rubbing his back in an attempt to calm him. “Benji is a tough guy. He will be fine.”

I looked down at my hands, my nails still crusted with Benji’s blood. I wanted to say the same, yet I had been the only one in this room to see the amount of blood he lost, the way he looked as they had wheeled him back to surgery. It would be imprinted on my mind for a long time.

The door opened, and we all looked at it anxiously, seeing the doctor in the doorway. “Mr. Lomns’ family?”

“That’s us,” Tony said, gripping Hannah’s hand tightly, concern on his face. “All of us.”

The doctor nodded, pulling off his surgical cap as if he had seen everything before. “Mr. Lomns lost a lot of blood. The bullet nicked one of the major arteries in his shoulder. I repaired it best I could and can’t guarantee that shoulder will ever be back to one hundred percent but that will be up to God and Mr. Lomns once we start testing out that shoulder. The bullet did a lot of vascular damage, and he will probably struggle with some feeling in that arm for quite some time.”

“So, he’s alive?” Paul asked, going straight to the point. The doctor nodded, and I felt my knees weaken, falling back into the chair. Benji was alive. So what if he didn’t have great use of that arm? He was alive, that was all that mattered.

“He’ll spend a few days in the hospital,” the doctor said. “He’s in intensive care right now and the next twenty-four hours will really tell the tale. I can say that he’s stable and his vitals look good.” He then drew in a breath, looking quite tired. “We only allow one visitor at a time. Who wants to see him first?”

“Danielle,” Tony said, surprising me. “She’s his girlfriend.”

I looked around the room, tears springing to my eyes. They all knew what Benji and I had been dancing around for the longest time. “I…”

“Go on,” Tony replied, giving me a nod. “He would rather see you than our ugly mugs anyway. Just tell him that we are all going to visit so he can be prepared.”

“Thank you,” I said softly, following the doctor out of the room. They had just given me another reason to love this group like family. It would have been easy for them to make me step aside, but clearly, they understood our feelings better than we probably did ourselves. Well no longer. I was going to tell him exactly how I felt. The doctor took me down a long hall and into the restricted area, the sounds of beeping machines and smells of antiseptics hitting me hard and reminding me of earlier times, times that didn’t have a good outcome. Pushing that thought aside, I forced myself to focus on the present. “He’s unconscious,” the doctor explained as he halted in front of the room. “We will wake him up tomorrow once we get all the blood in him. You’re going to see a lot of tubes and machines, but all of that is normal given the condition he was in. He can hear you so make sure that you speak to him, let him know you are there. It’s all part of a good healing process.”

“T-thank you,” I said, steeling myself for what I might see, my stomach in horrible knots. The doctor nodded, and I entered the room, gasping as I surveyed the scene. Benji didn’t look like Benji at all, with a tube sticking out of his mouth and his gorgeous body having tubes run out of it like some sci-fi movie. His left arm was bandaged up, his broken hand in a cast finally. This man was far from the strong fighter I had come to love. This man looked weak, and I was scared for him.

Approaching the bed, I chose to go to his good side, my hands shaking as I reached out and touched his arm. His skin was warm to the touch, and I exhaled, my fingers cupping his hand lightly, squeezing it so he would know I was here. “Oh Benji,” I said, tears springing to my eyes. “Why did you take that bullet?” He had saved my life. Henderson had told me more than once over the last few hours, stating that the shot had been directed at whoever found Amelia. “You’re lucky to be alive Parkman,” he had said before leaving. “You and Amelia.”

But now Benji was suffering for it. I just hoped he had seen that Amelia was alright before he was hit. “Thank you,” I said finally, bringing up his uninjured hand to press a kiss on the back of it, tears streaming down my face. He didn’t have to do what he did, and if that was not a declaration of some strong feelings between us, I didn’t know what would be. “Now you must get better so that you and Amelia can have the life that you deserve.” They had both been through so much since finding each other, and I hoped that he took some time off after this. Not that he had much of a choice.

Gripping his hand lightly, I drew in a breath. “I’m sorry Benji,” I said, hoping that he could hear me. “So sorry for what you have been through with me in your life. I never meant for you to take on my baggage, to get hurt like this. I never wanted you to get hurt.” A tear streaked down my cheek, and I wiped it away. “There’s not a moment we have had together that I regret. You brought something into my life that I desperately needed and I will never forget it.”

Standing, I pressed my cheek to his hand before laying it back down on the bed carefully, leaning over to touch my lips to his forehead. “I love you,” I whispered, hoping that I wasn’t making a mistake in letting my heart go with this man. He had taken a bullet for me, saved my life, and I could never repay him for what he had done for me. “Please, you have to pull through.” I couldn’t live without him.