CHAPTER 25

HE NEVER IS

Charlie

The grand opening of my bakery was tomorrow, and we were out celebrating. I felt a bit lame that I was celebrating with people I had just met when I started renting the place, but I didn’t have anyone else to invite outside my parents.

They were going to be with me all day tomorrow for the opening.

Brandon raised his beer and everyone at our table joined in. “To Freckles and the grand opening of Cherry on Top.” He winked at me, and I laughed at him and the name of my bakery.

“To Freckles.”

“Cherry on Top.” The voices were already starting to slur. I looked around at our group of friends, and I couldn’t help but feel emotional. These people hadn’t even known me a little over a month ago, but here they were, celebrating me and something I had worked at for so long. I wouldn’t have wanted to be here with anyone else. Even if Staci was a bit scary and Livy was more than a bit nosy, they were becoming my best friends.

Livy hooked her arm in mine, and she smiled at me with a smile that said she maybe had already had one too many to drink. “Come to the bathroom with me.”

I nodded my head and stood with her.

Brandon squeezed my fingers as I pulled my hand out of his even though he was already mid-conversation with Parker and Mason.

We pushed our way through the crowd to get to the bathroom, and I was surprised by how many people were out at a bar on a Wednesday night. I didn’t get out enough apparently.

“Oh my gosh, I have to pee so bad.” Livy rushed into a bathroom stall, and I laughed as I fixed my hair in the mirror.

There was something about me that looked so different. I wasn’t sure if anyone else noticed, but it was perfectly clear to me. It was as if something that had been clouding my eyes before had disappeared. I looked happy. I looked…

“Do you love Brandon?” Livy hiccupped as she came out of the stall buttoning her jeans.

“What?” I tucked my hair behind my ear.

“Oh, you heard me.” She started washing her hands. “Do you love Brandon?”

“I think it’s a little early for that. Don’t you?” It was far too early. It was too early to think of such things let alone say them out loud.

“Nope,” she said dramatically and started pulling paper towels out of the dispenser. “I think that it would be easy for you to fall in love with him.” She turned and looked me over from head to toe. “You have this look about you.”

“I don’t have a look.” I crossed my arms.

“Yes. You do.” She moved so close to me that I could smell the alcohol on her breath. “It looks good on you.” She pressed her finger against my nose like I was her little sister. “Come on.”

She linked her arm back with mine, and we made our way back toward our table.

I spotted a super pretty brunette talking to Brandon as soon as he came in view. The jealousy was instant and brutal, but it was irrational. I told myself to calm down. He wasn’t doing anything wrong, and I didn’t even know who the girl was. But then Livy tensed beside me when she saw her, and she planted a fake smile on her face as she looked over at me. Whoever the girl was, I wasn’t going to like the fact that she was sitting in my spot next to him.

As soon as we made it back to the table, she stood from my chair and said something to Brandon that I couldn’t hear over the noise of the bar. She passed by me and Livy with a smile on her face, and I realized that it was the first time in my life that I had truly wanted to punch another human in the face.

She hadn’t even done anything wrong, not that I knew of at least, but the feeling happened just the same.

Brandon pulled out the seat next to him with a smile on his face. He clearly wasn’t picking up on my irrational thoughts, and I prayed it stayed that way. I didn’t need him thinking that I was some psycho jealous girlfriend who he hadn’t even officially said he was dating.

But the thoughts were overwhelming me. I had no reason to doubt him. So, I let it go. Instead, I laced my fingers in his, and I smiled as he brought my hand to his mouth and kissed it.

Then I enjoyed my friends and celebrated the fact that everything I had been working for was finally happening. It all felt too good to be true, and it shocked me that none of that seemed to matter as much as the man sitting beside me.

Everything came crashing down the moment we got up to leave. Brandon went out to pull up the car since Livy and Staci were both a bit sauced, and I couldn’t stop laughing as the two of them kept telling me stories about the guys and all the stupid decisions they had made over the years.

I made my way up to the bar to grab them both a glass of water. We were having the best time, but the two of them were going to regret their decisions in the morning when they had to be at work.

The bartender all but rolled his eyes at me when I ordered the waters, but I didn’t care. It was all I had drunk all night, and I still left a tip on the table.

“Hey.” Someone saddled up beside me at the bar, and I instantly recognized the girl as the one who had been sitting next to Brandon earlier.

“Hi,” I said hesitantly.

“Are you here with Brandon?” She didn’t sugarcoat what she was after.

“Umm.” I looked back toward the table, but neither Livy nor Staci were looking in my direction.

“Sorry.” She waved off her question. “I was just curious. He hasn’t called me in a few days so I was worried. I shouldn’t have assumed though.”

“And you are?” I turned my attention fully toward her. She was pretty. Like seriously pretty and that little seed of jealousy that I had managed to squash earlier bloomed full force.

“I’m Alicia.” She smiled at me like that was somehow supposed to make me feel better. When I didn’t say anything, she continued. “Brandon and I have been off and on for a few years now.”

He failed to mention that to me.

“Gotcha,” I answered curtly before I turned back to the bartender and grabbed the two glasses of water he set in front of me.

“So, are the two of you?” She pushed her hair behind her ear. “Are the two of you dating?”

I felt bad for her. I didn’t know if she was talking to me to be malicious or because she actually cared about Brandon, but either way, it made me sad.

“Not officially. No.” I was honest with her.

“He never is.” She tapped her fingers against the bar and gave me a sad smile. “I’m sorry to bother you.”

She pushed off the bar like she couldn’t believe that she had actually come over and actually said all those words to me, but I wouldn’t forget it. They were branded in my brain.

He never is.

Her words played over and over in my head until I could think of nothing else.

I set the glasses of water down in front of the girls, and I stared down at the table in front of me. I had just told myself only an hour before how irrational I was being, but Alicia came up and pushed it in my face. All my fears.

Brandon never said what he wanted out of this. Is this what he did? I couldn’t believe that Livy and Staci wouldn’t have told me if that was the case, but they were loyal to him.

“You ready?” Parker asked as he looked back through the bar where Alicia and I had just stood.

“Yeah.” I stood and grabbed my clutch.

I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t let myself go here. Not tonight. Tomorrow was the biggest day of my career, and I had already been far too distracted. I didn’t need anything else. I couldn’t take it.

I climbed into the backseat of Brandon’s car without much thought. Brandon smiled at me through the rearview mirror, and even though I knew it was strained, I returned it. He cocked his head to the side, but I avoided his gaze and looked over at Livy as she got into the seat right beside me. Staci was getting in Mason’s truck so it was unnecessary, but there was something about her being so close to me that calmed me. It was like she somehow knew that I needed her right when I did.

She leaned her head on my shoulder, and I pressed my own head against hers as I let every horrible thought I had been trying to push down raced through my mind.

By the time we got to the bakery to drop Parker and Livy at their car, I knew that I needed to go home. To my home. I was too caught up in my own head to spend the night with Brandon. We had spent every night together since that first night he had come to my apartment, and I needed to clear my head.

I moved toward my car, but Brandon caught my hand. “Where are you going?”

“My car’s here.” It was the only thing I could think to say.

“I’ll bring you back here in the morning. Stay with me tonight.”

I shook my head and tried not to let my word vomit happen. “Tomorrow is a big day. I just need to get some rest.”

“I’ll let you get at least a bit of rest.” He squeezed my hand.

His words seemed to flame the fire that was burning inside me. “I’m sure you could call someone else if you need sex that badly tonight.”

He jolted back as if I had struck him. “What are you talking about?”

I pulled my hand from his and rubbed it along my forehead where a headache was forming. “Tomorrow is a big day,” I tried again. “I can’t afford any distractions tonight. I can’t let anything fuck this up.”

He looked at me like he had never seen me before. “So, I’m just a distraction now?”

I didn’t have a clue what he was.

“That’s not what I’m saying. I’m just stressed out and—”

“Fine.” He didn’t let me finish. “You go home distraction free where no one will be there to fuck up your big day.” He started walking back to his car.

“Brandon,” I called out his name, but he didn’t stop.

I knew I was an asshole, I knew that I was ruining everything, but I didn’t stop him.