Nate coughed into his palm, the muscles of his bare torso flexing as he stared down at me. He looked even better than I remembered. Dark hair, bright eyes, and a toned body.

My heart swelled, and my glee barely remained caged inside me. My ploy had worked perfectly. I stood beneath his balcony, and he kept glancing away, trying to look at anything but me. It didn’t work—his gaze always returned to my face and lower. The growing darkness cast him in shadow, but I could feel his eyes roving over me.

“You, um, you’re back from school then?” He gripped the balcony railing.

“Yep. I’ll be heading to Temple in the fall, remember?”

He likely didn’t remember at all. I’d sent him an email about it in the winter when I’d gotten accepted, and he had responded with a perfunctory “congrats.”

We hadn’t seen each other for five years. He’d kept me at my boarding school and sent me on vacations rather than seeing me during the summers or over holidays. I’d stayed away from Philly, and I’d abided by his wishes. But not anymore. I was eighteen and ready to come home. I was also ready for Nate Franco, though I knew he wouldn’t be ready for me.

“Right. Temple.” He rubbed a palm down his jaw, the other hand gripping the railing so tightly the knuckles were turning white.

“In town. So, I can stay here … if that’s all right with you?” I clasped my hands behind my back, knowing full well it pushed my chest out farther. My breasts weren’t large, but they filled out the bikini top. “I know you don’t have to be my guardian anymore since I’m of age, but I was hoping I could stay around even if we aren’t really related or anything.”

“Stay around?” His voice had a rough, gravelly quality. I’d forgotten that tiny detail, but it all came back in a rush of memory. “You’re safe now. I swear.” The first words he’d ever said to me ricocheted through my mind, the rich timbre of his voice just the same. The moment I’d fallen for him sealed into my memory, even if I hadn’t understood it at the time. I’d been too young, too traumatized.

“Yeah. Here at the house.” I smiled. “With you.”

“That’s …” He cleared his throat, but didn’t seem inclined to continue.

“Are you hungry?” I unclasped my hands and toyed with the string bikini tie around my neck.

His head tilted, following my movement. After a heavy pause, he gritted out, “Yes.”

“Come down to eat?” I tugged on the string just a little.

He slapped his hand down on the rail. “I—no.” He coughed again and shook his head, as if trying to clear away a haze of thoughts. “I have work to do.”

Had I overplayed it? “Oh.” I pouted and dropped my hands to my sides. “I was hoping we could talk about college.”

“Maybe tomorrow. At breakfast.” He backed away, though I could feel his gaze. “Like I said, I’ve got lots of work, so I’ll see you then. At breakfast.”

“Okay.” I shrugged and walked around to the stairs, swaying my hips as I went. Dropping onto the top stair, I reached up, stretching my body taut, then dove into the pool and swam end to end. When I emerged again, his balcony doors were closed, and I couldn’t see him, but the prickling sensation along the nape of my neck told me he was still watching. I made a show of arranging my towel on a pool chair and lying down, letting the warm night breeze dry my skin.

Reaching up, I slowly pulled the string at my neck, untying it and peeling the strings down to the thin material of the triangles over my breasts. I stared at his window, and I wanted to pull the top all the way off, to show him what was his. But I didn’t. I let the strings lie on my stomach and I wriggled down onto the lounge chair, the fabric still covering my hard nipples.

Closing my eyes, I imagined him coming down to the pool. He’d stand above me, then pluck the bikini top away so he could see how hard my nipples were for him. His green eyes would survey me, take it all in, and then he’d drag his fingertips down my wet body until he found the slickness between my legs.

I threw my arms over my head and pressed my thighs together at the heat my imaginings stirred inside me. I should have known better. Fantasizing about Nate had become my favorite pastime at boarding school. I’d spend my alone time thinking about him, planning how our first time together would be, imagining his body on top of mine. The other girls at school were losing their virginity and racking up boyfriends while I had an imaginary, smoking-hot relationship with my guardian. Seeing no evidence of my interest in boys, they judged me to be a prude. But they were wrong. My issue was simple: I didn’t want a boy. I wanted a man. One man in particular.

My mind wandered further, to what Nate would do to me once we were both naked. I’d spread my legs for him, showing him something that I’d never offered to anyone else. What would he say? I longed to reach down and pleasure myself, but if one little twirl of my bikini top had spooked him, a full-on masturbation sesh below his balcony might be the wrong approach.

I sighed and wrapped my towel around me, then sat up. Walking around the pool, I gave one more glance to his window and decided I would continue my imaginings alone in my room.