Twenty-four hours. It's been twenty-four hours since Jude left. I heard Marney on the phone last night talking to Gabriel, telling him that Jude wanted him go and retrieve Cayla.

There’s a sense of dread that clings to me like a cloak, and I can’t seem to shake it. I was on edge when I panicked and told Jude to turn himself in for Cayla, but I know that's exactly what he's gone to do. I saw it in his eyes. He was saying goodbye.

My already battered heart is crumbling in my chest because I've just lost the two most important people in my world, and I have no idea whether either of them will come back to me. The thought that something may happen to him is crippling. The idea of anyone hurting Cayla is a pain I cannot even put into words. I know Jude feels the same, so I can't persecute his actions. If I were wanted I would trade myself for Cayla in a heartbeat, and truthfully, I'd trade Jude as well. I love him with all my heart, but for my daughter—I would sacrifice even him. I would sacrifice everything and anything to keep her safe. And not being able to do so is torture.

Every time I close my eyes, I can't help but picture my little girl scared and alone, suffering at the hands of men who hate her father. My worst fears constantly play out in my imagination and I can't stand it. I can barely breathe knowing she's there. The door opens and Marney comes back in from outside, a cloud of smoke still clinging to him.

"I need to use a phone," I say, chewing on my thumb nail.

Sighing, he looks at me for a second before handing me his phone. I dial Jude's number and place the phone to my ear. It rings once and goes to voicemail. I hang up, clutching the phone in my hand. Shit. He’s been gone too long to have heard nothing. Scrolling through Marney's phone, I stop when I see Gabriel's name. My finger hovers over the call button for a second before I press it. After only two rings he picks up.

"Si?"

"Gabriel."

He sighs and I hear the creak of a chair. "Tor."

"I...do you have Cayla?" I ask, my heart pounding as I wait for the answer.

"I'm sorry. I don't."

I pull the phone from my face, swallowing back a choked sob before I bring it to my ear again. "I know Jude made a deal. I know you were supposed to get Cayla. Where is she? Where is Jude?"

"You do realize that if Jude goes to Jesús, he will fuck me?"

"I don't give a rat's arse if he fucks you so hard his dick comes out your fucking mouth!" I shout. Marney chuckles.

"Trying to seduce me with that foul language will get you nowhere." Gabriel laughs.

"This is not funny. They have my daughter, Gabriel." My temper is spiking dangerously right now. I'm not sure how much more I can take.

"No, it's not. But you and Jude do not understand the ways of the cartel. This is not his little bookie bullshit. The cartel is something the devil doesn't even fuck with." He exhales. "Domingo and Jesús don't negotiate, they provoke fear." There is such a cold indifference to his voice, I almost don't recognize him. "Trust me, I've slaughtered entire families to teach others a lesson, and we rarely trade a life for a life. That's not the kind of message that makes people fear you. That is a message that gives hope. There is no hope in this world."

I swallow back the bile rising in my throat. I don't know what to say to him. I have no words. "Where is Jude?" I ask again.

"I'm handling Jude,” he says, then hangs up.

I clutch the phone in my hand, but I don’t cry even though every bit of hope I had is now crushed. And on the heels of my denial is acceptance. The cartel has my daughter and no one is getting her back. I can't just sit here. I won't. I don't care if I must walk right into the lion's den, I will not leave Cayla alone. If she's with the monsters, then I want to be as well. I have trusted Jude time and time again to fix things, but this time, Cayla is involved and that changes everything. I lean down and slip my hand inside my handbag, palming my gun and slowly bringing it out.

I nervously glance at Marney, holding the gun down beside the mattress as I clear my throat. "Marney, I need a favour.”

"What’cha need?" he says, completely focused on the TV.

"I need to go to Mexico," I say. I know he has orders. I know Jude would never allow this, but I'm done giving Jude chances. Twenty-four hours is too long. Cayla needs me.

"Aw, now, little darlin', you know I can't go doing that…"

I pinch the bridge of my nose, fighting off the tension headache that's threatening. I pull my gun, pointing it at him before I slowly lift my gaze. Marney slumps down in the chair, shaking his head. I like Marney, but I can’t even feel guilty about this. No one is going to stand between me and my daughter. Not even Marney. "Pick up your keys and start walking, Marney."

"Jude's not gonna be happy about this now, Tor…"

"Jude got us into this fucking mess!" I shout, my voice cracking with the strain. "Jude is the reason they have my daughter, Marney."

Marney sighs and shakes his head. "Hell, Tor I—"

"Don't." I cut him off. "Don't try to change my mind. I need to be with her and I don't care what that costs me. Now, take me to the cartel or I swear to god, I will shoot you."

"Easy there," he chuckles as he pushes up from the chair, "you ain't got to go shooting nobody." I keep the gun aimed at him as he opens the door and then I slip it beneath my shirt. He walks to the car and opens the door. "You do realize this is the cartel,” Marney says as he walks out into the car park. “This ain't no gun and pony show. They string guys up out in the streets. They make Joe look like a soft bastard."

Tears prick my eyes. "Yes, and they have Cayla!" My voice is edging on hysteria, but I fight it back.

"Hell, what's it matter? We're all about to die anyway, may as well be Jude that puts the bullet in my head..." he mumbles as he opens the driver's side door to the car. He takes a deep breath and nods once before turning the engine over. The truck roars to life and we pull away.

A mile down the road, I grab Marney’s phone from the dashboard and throw it out the window. I know the second I'm out of this car he'll find a phone and call Jude, but I don't need Jude stopping me before I get there. I know this isn't a plan, but it's what I need to do.