“Nash, this is Lana. Lana, this is my long lost son, Nash.”

Nash stared at the woman. She was a far cry from what he’d expected. She was professional looking with shoulder length black hair, very minimal makeup and a welcoming smile.

“Nice to meet you,” Nash said.

“Oh, Nash, I’m so happy to finally meet you. Your father is so proud of you.”

Proud? His father. Surely she had him confused with someone else.

Brick was on the back deck working the grill with Billy while Nash got acquainted - albeit awkwardly - with his soon to be new step mother.

“Proud? Of me?”

“Of course, sweetie. He’s talked about you in such glowing terms since I met him. I couldn’t wait to meet you!” She continued chopping the lettuce for the salad, tossing each piece into a large colander in the sink.

“Wow. That’s interesting. I’m not sure he told you the full story…”

“Sure he did. Honey, family stuff can be hard. I have a grown daughter, and we didn’t speak for six months because of a stupid argument. These things happen. But your Daddy was proud of you even when he didn’t agree with your choices.”

“Good to hear… I guess…”

Nash was having problems processing all of the information he was getting lately. His father’s engagement. Emmy’s cheating, stealing husband.

Things had changed a lot in Whiskey Ridge, it appeared.

“So how did you meet my father?”

Lana smiled as she started shredding purple cabbage over the bowl.

“Oh, now that’s a story in itself. You see, I’m a large animal vet. I had a practice back in Nashville… that’s where I’m from… but hadn’t set up my practice in Whiskey Ridge just yet…”

“How on Earth did you end up in Whiskey Ridge?”

“Well, now, which story do you want to hear?” she asked with a giggle.

Nash found himself smiling. This woman was actually nice. And she loved his father, evidently. A nice woman was in love with his father. Miracles apparently did happen.

“So here I am, my first day in town, when I run into Danny at the pet store…”

“Danny?” Nash said.

“Your father?” she responded laughing.

“Sorry. I don’t think I’ve ever heard anyone refer to him by his real name. Everyone calls him Brick.”

“Yeah, well I’m not everyone. And Brick makes him sound like he either has rocks in his head or he’s a linebacker for the local football team.”

“Sorry, I interrupted you…” Nash said, taking a handful of chips from a bowl on the kitchen island.

“Anyway, I saw Danny looking at some dog supplements. You know, for that old hound dog he keeps at the barn? Well, I knew he could order them online for half the price, but I sure didn’t want the manager to hear me say that. No need to piss off my new fellow citizens, right?”

She was so easygoing as she spoke. Smiling and giggling to herself as she continued preparing what was sure to be the world’s largest salad. And Nash, despite himself, couldn’t help but smile with her. She was light. She had no pretense. She was just vivacious and elegant and funny. And he found himself feeling a little bit jealous of his father’s good fortune to find such a woman so late in life.

“Well, we ended up chatting for so long in the aisle of the store that the place closed and asked us to leave. So we walked over to Duke’s and had a nightcap. And we’ve basically been inseparable ever since!”

“Wow. That’s great.”

Lana looked up from her salad preparation and smiled at Nash.

“I know your father was a bit of a curmudgeon in his younger days, Nash. This isn’t my first time at this rodeo, so to speak. But just because a person has made mistakes in the past doesn’t mean they have to continue making them in the future. Give your Daddy a chance. I promise you won’t be sorry if you just leave open the slightest possibility that he’s a better man today than he was when you last spoke to him.”

“Sounds like he owes that transformation to you,” Nash said softly, being careful that his father wasn’t back in the house yet.

“People don’t change unless they really want to, my boy. And Lord knows, change is hard. Danny wanted to be a better man for you boys… and probably for me too a little bit,” she said with a wink.

Before Nash could speak, he heard the back door open. Brick appeared behind him and then leaned over to kiss Lana on the cheek as she cut up onions and struggled not to cry.

“Goodness gracious, woman, how big of a salad are you making?” Billy said as he walked into the house with a plate stacked with steaks.

“It’s just like Southern hairstyles. The bigger they are, the closer to God!”

Everyone laughed at that, and Nash had a momentary glimpse of what a normal, happy family felt like - something he’d never known in his whole life. And something he’d never realized - until just now - that he needed so much.

* * *

Emmy sat nervously in the chair. Her mother, on the other hand, sat beside her without a care in the world, reading some trashy magazine while smacking her chewing gum.

“Mother, could you please stop cracking that gum?”

“Could you please stop correcting me?” Pauline said without looking up. “Good Lord, would you look at her butt? That has to be fake. God don’t make butts that shape…” She held out the magazine to Emmy.

“Stop it! Aren’t you the slightest bit anxious to hear what Dr. Gaines has to say about your bloodwork?”

“Nah. I’ve had more blood drawn over my life than ten people combined. No big whoop,” she said, looking back down at her magazine.

“Well, I wish I could be as anxiety free as you are.”

“Emmy, you’ve never been anxiety free a day in your life. You came out of my loins all wound up tighter than a ball of yarn.”

“Thanks a lot for that visual image, Mom.”

“Hello, ladies,” Dr. Gaines said as he walked into his office. “Sorry to keep you waiting.”

“Doctors always keep you waiting, mainly because they’re usually arrogant people in general,” Pauline said flippantly before tossing her magazine on the side table.

“Mom!”

“It’s okay, Emmy. Your Mom and I go way back,” he said with a smile.

“Apologize,” Emmy said under her breath.

“Apologize for what? The doc here knows I was just messing around. Right, Doc?”

“Of course,” he said, shooting a grin at Emmy. “I have your blood test results.”

“Am I pregnant?”

Emmy put her head in her hands. “Do you see what I’m dealing with here?”

“I understand, Emmy. And it’s okay. Your mother has always had her own particular sense of humor. Anyway, Miss Pauline, you have one smart daughter here. She was totally right about your B12 levels. They are incredibly low. Have you been feeling tired lately?”

“I’m old, Doc. Of course I feel tired.”

“What about pins and needles in your hands or feet? Any of that?”

“Sometimes.”

“Well, what we’re going to do today is start you on some B12 shots. You will come in regularly for shots and then we’ll reassess in a few weeks to see what your levels are, okay?”

“Sounds like a plan,” Pauline said before digging through her purse for another piece of gum. “Say, Doc, do you happen to have any gum?”

Dr. Gaines smiled. “Why don’t you go talk to Kathleen at the front desk. I think she has some treats we give the younger kids.”

Pauline grabbed her purse and left the room in search of more gum.

“Sorry about her. She can be a bit…”

“It’s okay, Emmy. Your mother has been seeing me for a good ten years. I know her personality well.”

“So do you think these shots might help her forgetfulness?”

Dr. Gaines sighed and sat back against his brown leather chair. “Maybe. I’ve been doing some research, and I want to try a regimen that has helped others with dementia symptoms. But don’t get your hopes up just in case it doesn’t work out, okay?”

“Any hope is a good thing right now. I really appreciate you testing her.”

As Emmy walked with Pauline to the car, she felt such a sense of gratitude for Nash. At least there was a possibility that her mother might get better, thus freeing her up to start her life over again.

The only problem was she didn’t even know where to start.

* * *

Nash groaned as Emmy worked his calf muscle. He’d only been in therapy for a couple of weeks now, but he was already seeing some progress.

He spent most of his day out of the wheelchair, but he was using a walker instead which made him feel a bit like he should be living at the retirement village. Maybe Pauline’s room was still available.

“How’s that pressure?” Emmy asked.

“It’s fine.”

“You okay?” Emmy asked.

“Yeah. Just wish I was progressing faster.”

“I’m doing the best I can, Nash.”

He tilted his head and looked at her. “It’s not about what you’re doing. It’s about the fact that I’m apparently getting old and decrepit, so my body isn’t bouncing back like I’d hoped.”

“You have to give it time, Nash. We’ve talked about this. Turn over.”

Nash gingerly turned over. He was getting faster at it, but certainly not back to normal.

Emmy stacked more pillows behind him, and he scooted up to face her.

“Lift this arm,” she said as he started working on his range of motion exercises. Although she threw other things in each week, he had a specific set of basic exercises they always did.

“Listen, you’re getting better every session. And if you’re doing your home exercises too, I expect exponential progress each week.”

“But when can I ride again?” Nash asked.

Emmy stopped for a moment. “There are no guarantees. We’ve talked about this. But…”

“But what?”

“I think you’re winning the fight against the physical injuries you have, Nash.”

“That’s good, right?”

“Of course. But I’m not so sure you’re dealing with the emotional stuff.”

Nash rolled his eyes. “Don’t get all woo woo on me, Emmy.”

She laughed. “It’s not woo woo. Emotional scars can have a great impact on the physical body. You may not heal fully until you deal with those things.”

“Like what? How am I emotionally scarred?” he said, holding his hand up to his heart and fluttering his eyelashes.

“You think it’s funny, but it’s real. You haven’t dealt with the idea that you’re getting older and that riding bulls may not be in the cards for you anymore. You haven’t dealt with the emotions of being replaced by younger riders. You haven’t dealt with the issues with your father. You haven’t dealt our…” she stopped herself, her eyes widening for a moment as if she’d almost let something slip out.

Nash stared at her for a moment, not breaking eye contact. “I haven’t dealt with losing the love of my life?”

She cleared her throat and looked down at his arm. “We don’t discuss personal issues here, Nash. This is therapy. Remember our agreement?”

“Then let’s go somewhere else.”

* * *

“Where’s your Mom?” Nash asked as they walked into her small house.

“My cousin Debbie took her out for a day of beauty,” Emmy said as she opened the mini blinds and created a plume of dust. She coughed and fanned her hand across her face.

“And what does a day of beauty include?” Nash asked with a laugh as he lowered himself to the 70’s styled sofa.

Emmy sat down in the arm chair next to him and smiled. “Well, let’s see. Eyebrow waxing, a hair cut, upper lip waxing…”

Nash put up his hand. “Please stop. I shouldn’t have asked.”

“Want some coffee?”

“Nah. I’m good,” he said. Emmy had to admit she was stalling. Never in a million years did she expect Nash to want to talk about their past. He’d never been an overly communicative sort, probably as a result of living with his hard headed, stubborn, jackwad of a father.

“So, what’re we doing here, Nash?” she finally summoned the courage to ask.

“I think you may be right.”

“Wow. You think I’m right about something? Has Dr. Miller upped your dosage?”

Nash chuckled. “I’ll have you know I’m one-hundred percent off pain pills and muscle relaxants, thank you very much. Just taking a little ibuprofen here and there.”

“I’m proud of you for that. I know how hard those medications can be to withdraw from.”

“It was hard, but Dr. Miller helped me taper the dosages.”

Now they were small talking. She knew this avoidance tactic very well.

“So I’ll ask again… what am I right about?”

Nash sat back against the sofa and took in a deep breath.

“Look, I know that I haven’t dealt with a lot of things in my past that I need to. I feel this weight on me all the time, and I know my blood pressure was up at my last appointment. So I think you may be right that it’s hindering my progress.”

“You’re still doing really good, Nash. Better than I expected. Your range of motion is…”

“Em.”

“What?”

“Let me talk.”

“Sorry.”

“I really like my Dad’s fiancee. She’s nice, and she has changed him, I think. He’s softer. Kinder. More open to change.”

“That’s good, I guess.” Emmy still had her own hard feelings against Brick, but she decided not to remind Nash of that right now.

“There’s a lot I may need to talk out with someone… a professional, I guess.”

“I know of a couple of great therapists at the hospital. Dr. Nance and Dr. Gable both come highly recommended…”

“Thanks. I’ll look into both of them. But that’s not why I wanted to talk to you alone, Em.”

“Oh?”

“I think we both need to air out some things. Don’t you?”

Emmy looked down at her hands. They’d never really talked about it once things ended so abruptly. There were no letters or phone calls. One day, it was just over. And there were plenty of feelings to go around. Abandonment. Sorrow. Confusion. Anger. Betrayal. So many emotions that it was hard to keep up with.

But did she really want to open that can of worms? She was just starting to get used to being around Nash again. She was able to do her job and be cordial without strangling him or kissing him.

“Do you really think it’s a good idea that we go down that road, Nash? It’s the past. Maybe it’s better that we leave it there.”

“I would’ve said the same thing a few weeks ago. But when you almost die, it changes your perspective. And I know I wouldn’t feel right if I didn’t say some things.”

She swallowed hard and tried to ignore the fluttering heartbeat in her chest. This was a time of her life she hadn’t visited in awhile.

“Okay.”

Nash took another moment as if he was gathering his thoughts.

“I was young and stupid. I was scared when you told me you were pregnant, and I made the worst mistake of my life in the way I reacted.”

Emmy stared into space, unable to make eye contact. Finding out she was pregnant just before she turned eighteen years old hadn’t been in her longterm plans. She was ready to leave for college at the time, but instead found herself peeing on a stick in the drugstore bathroom.

“I should’ve been more supportive, Em. I should have stopped the whole rodeo thing and told my Dad to back off.”

Brick had gone ballistic when Nash told him Emmy was pregnant. He’d confronted Emmy himself one day when her mother wasn’t home. Of course, Emmy was still basically a kid, and that had rattled her in a big way at the time.

Emmy still couldn’t speak. She didn’t know what to say. That it was okay? It wasn’t. That she forgave him? She wasn’t sure she did.

“Your Dad told me to get an abortion, Nash. Told me that I was going to ruin your life,” she said softly.

“I know. I’m so sorry, Emmy. He was so wrong, and I believe it’s why I still can’t connect with him no matter how hard I try. I’m still angry about it all.”

“And then the day it happened… the day I lost our baby… you weren’t there. You had already taken off to Vegas. All I had was my mother to support me, and she isn’t exactly the best person to help in times of crisis.”

“God, Emmy, I’m sorry.” He slid to the edge of the sofa and looked at her. “I’ve beat myself up a million times over not being there when you miscarried our baby. But you have to understand that I didn’t know about the miscarriage until weeks later, and by then I was afraid you wouldn’t take my calls…”

“You didn’t even try, Nash. Not one letter or phone call. You just left me here to deal with all alone.”

“I was an idiot at the time. And I was scared…”

Emmy stood up, her face feeling flush and tears threatening to spill over. “You don’t think I was scared? I was terrified! My whole life was about to come to an end before it even started. I wasn’t ready to be a mother, but I was committed to it. You left thinking I was pregnant, and you didn’t have plans to come back and be a father!”

Nash tried to stand, but fell back to the couch without his walker to use for assistance. He sighed and rubbed his eyes.

“I did plan to come back. That’s how I found out about the miscarriage.”

“Why did you leave me like that then? You said you loved me.”

“I loved you more than anyone in this world, Em. You weren’t just some high school crush. Even then, I believed I’d spend the rest of my life with you. I just panicked.”

“You panicked? Well, what do you think I was doing?”

“No, you don’t understand. I wasn’t panicked about having a baby with you. I was excited about that.”

“Then why were you panicked?” she asked, sitting back down.

“Because I wanted to be able to provide for both of you. I wanted to buy you a ring… the kind you deserved. I wanted to buy everything our baby needed. And I knew my Dad would make my life, and yours, miserable if I worked for him. I was going to go to Vegas, make as much money as I could and be back before the baby was born with a big diamond ring in my hand. I knew if I told you why I was leaving that you’d say not to go, that we would make it work somehow. But I was a broke kid with no college education and no way to provide for you and the baby. So I took off thinking you’d understand once I got back, that you’d forgive me when you saw I was just trying to make money for us. But then my father called me and told me about the miscarriage. Apparently Pauline had confronted my Dad and told him off.”

“So why didn’t you call? Why didn’t you come home then?”

“I was a coward. By then, I was already getting a name for myself in Vegas. I knew my Dad was angry at me for leaving his business. I knew you probably hated me. I just stayed away hoping you could go on with your life.”

Emmy allowed a stray tear to run down her cheek. “I needed you,” she whispered.

Nash reached across and tried to take her hand, but Emmy stood up.

“Please don’t do that,” she said, rubbing her hand on the front of her pants.

“I don’t know how else to make amends, Em.”

“Honestly, I’m not sure it’s possible.”

Nash cleared his throat. “Fair enough. But I hope maybe someday we can at least be friends.”

Emmy didn’t speak. “I have to get back to work.”

“Of course.”

Emmy retrieved his walker and slid it in front of him before asking if he needed a ride back home.

“Nah, it’s only a few blocks and I need the exercise if I want to…”

“Get back to your real life?” she said, finishing his sentence.

“Yeah. I think that will be better for both of us.”

“I’ll see you Monday,” Emmy said as she walked him to the door.

“Look, if you’re not comfortable working with me, I can find…”

“No. As I told you before, I’m a professional. I don’t quit on people.”

A silence hung in the air as Nash seemed to get her double meaning. He walked out and down the sidewalk without looking back.