Chapter 9
CASH'S KISS WAS searing intensity and raw need, so desperate that tears filled Bryn's eyes. She clung to him and kissed him back, her entire soul burning for the man in her arms. What had begun as something innocent and pure so long ago was now a tangled web of heartache, tragedy, loss, and connection. Cash had always been a part of who she was, and the sensation of his hands roaming her back and sliding beneath her camisole was incredible. With every kiss, a part of her seemed to settle, and the pain that had been etched in her heart for so long began to fade.
With a low growl that made her heart quicken, Cash rolled her onto her back. He lowered himself on top of her, pinning her beneath the muscled strength of his body. He was a lethal combination of sinewy strength, lightning-quick reflexes, and elemental danger on every level...but he had always been that way. He'd never been soft, except with her. He'd never been gentle, except with her. He'd always lived on the edge, a feral outsider, lurking on the fringes of the society that would never accept him.
But now she knew why. He'd always been a wolf, long before he'd ever shifted. He'd been different from the people who existed in sheltered, empty lives, unable to embrace the depths of who they truly were.
Cash slid his lips over her jaw, kissing down the side of her neck with fervent heat, sending desire cascading through her. Bryn trapped his hair in her fingers as he dragged his teeth over her collarbone and then lower, over the swell of her breasts, his mouth closing over her nipple through her camisole, in a searing swell of pleasure.
She arched her back, needing more, shifting restlessly beneath him as he palmed her other breast with his hand. "I want this," she whispered. "I want you."
"Are you so certain?" His fingers slid over her chest, along the lace of her camisole to the V between her breasts. He paused, tracing the lace as he kissed along the path his fingers had taken. He lifted his head to look at her, and her breath caught at the golden color of his irises. His pupils were dilated in the darkness, an animal adjusting to the low light. He looked wild and untamed, hovering on the edge of control. For the first time, she began to understand what he meant. As dangerous as he'd been before, he was different now, so much more...but so was she.
She framed his face with her hands, her heart aching for him. "I love you, Cash. I always have, but it's different now. You know that, don't you? You understand that's why I want this, right? I'm yours. I always have been, but you're mine, and I'll fight for you as much as you fight for me."
His eyes darkened to a deep amber, and then, with one effortless move, he tore open her camisole, ripping the soft fabric cleanly. The cool air hit her breasts, and her nipples hardened. He didn't move to kiss her. He simply gazed reverently at her body, his fingers brushing over her breasts. "So beautiful," he whispered.
She smiled at the awe in his voice. "They're just breasts," she teased.
He looked up at her, and there was no humor in his eyes. "They're yours, and that makes them beautiful." He cupped one in his palm and pressed a kiss to her nipple, not a kiss of seduction, but a kiss of tenderness and connection.
Tears filled her eyes, and her heart ached with longing. "How is it that you always make me feel so special? You've always been able to do that."
"Because I believe you are." He took her nipple into his mouth then, swirling his tongue around the taut peak, sending sparks of desire shooting through her belly. His mouth felt amazing on her skin, a decadent promise that made her belly clench with desire.
She instinctively arched into his kiss, needing more, wanting more. He continued his assault with his mouth, and slid his hand down her side, over her hip. He'd touched her hip hundreds of times in her life, but it was different now, burning with purpose and sensuality. She felt as though his touch had left behind a path of flames on her skin.
He moved up and kissed her neck, just below her ear, his hand moving in tempting circles on her hip. "I want more," he whispered. "I want skin. All of it. Mine."
Heat flushed her body. "Then take it."
He growled softly, and lightly bit her neck, making her jump. Then he sat up, still straddling her, and ripped off his shirt. His muscles were taut and defined, the body of a predator in prime physical condition. She instinctively reached for him, running her hands over his lean body. "You're the one who's beautiful."
He laughed then, grabbing her hands and pressing a kiss to each of her palms. "Men shouldn't be beautiful. Ruggedly handsome. Hot as hell. Blistering with sexuality."
She laughed aloud. "Blistering with sexuality? Really?"
"Damn right." He grabbed her wrists and pinned them over her head. "I've been wanting to get you naked ever since my first wet dream when I was thirteen. Don't screw it up by calling me beautiful." He kissed her again, hard, penetrating, ruthless. It wasn't until she was panting and squirming that he finally released her.
She dug her hands beneath the pillow, her chest heaving as he kissed his way down her body, over her breasts, along her ribs, across her stomach, to the waistband of her stretch pants. She caught her breath, and lifted her head to look at him.
He was watching her face, his chin brushing against the elastic. He hooked his fingers over the sides of her pants and grinned so devilishly that she burst out laughing. "And finally, she's mine," he whispered in a voice so sinister that chills prickled down her arms.
"You're terrifying," she said, swallowing hard as he began to tug her pants down.
"Damn right." He kissed her belly button, never taking his eyes off her face. "Don't ever forget it." He kissed lower on her belly, sliding her pants over her thighs.
Heat rushed through her when she realized he was taking her underwear with the pants. "You're not leaving me with any modesty?"
"Fuck that." He ripped her pants off in one swift move. "You can't hide from me, woman. It's far too late for that." Then he grabbed her thighs and dragged her across the bed toward him.
She shrieked in laughter, but the laugh died in her throat when he pressed a kiss between her legs, a kiss that made her gasp in shock. He was ruthless with his kisses, invading her body on every level, biting just hard enough to make her squirm, his tongue masterful, his fingers playing her body like he'd known it his whole life. She was utterly vulnerable to him, exposed to him in every way, completely at his mercy, and he knew it. She could tell in the possessive way he gripped her hips, in the fierceness of his kiss, in the tautness of his shoulders.
Desire built inside her, twisting more and more tightly, until she could barely even think. Pleasure seared though her, the kind of agonizing pleasure that needed relief, but each time she came close, he backed off, not giving her respite, stringing her along until she thought she was going to break. It was torturous perfection, holding her at the precipice, owning her body and making her his. She twisted under the assault, her ankles locked around his shoulders, surrendering herself to him. An orgasm swelled inside her, and he pulled back, cutting her off just before she went over the edge.
She opened her eyes as he sat on the edge of the bed and ripped off his boots. Perspiration beaded on his shoulders, his eyes glowing amber as he raked his gaze over her restless body as he stood up and yanked off his jeans and boxers, his cock springing free.
"You're amazing, Bryn." His voice was reverent and low, almost a growl as he followed her back onto the bed, showering her with kisses so intense that she couldn't even think. "I love your body," he whispered. "You're sexy as hell. Every man's dream."
Bracing himself on his elbows, he held himself above her as he kissed her again, a ravenous, claiming kiss that made her entire body clench with need. She kissed him back, her legs instinctively parting as he sank his hips between her thighs, his cock pressing against her entrance, teasing her, tempting her.
He broke the kiss and pulled back enough so she could see him. His eyes were pure gold now, with not even a fleck of green. He held her gaze, his eyes boring into hers as he shifted his hips. "Now, you're mine," he whispered, and then plunged deep inside her.
She gasped, gripping his shoulders as he filled her. Tears welled in her eyes as he went still, watching her, waiting for her to adjust. "We finally did it, didn't we?" she said, trying to keep the tears out of her voice. It felt so right with him, a lifetime that had led to this moment. She was overwhelmed, almost afraid to feel all the emotions he was stirring up inside her.
He brushed his thumb across her cheek, wiping away a tear that had trickled free. "It ain't over yet, babe." He kissed her again, and then began to move his hips, sliding out of her with tantalizing slowness, before driving deep again.
Again and again, he thrust, always kissing her, always touching, his hands roaming her body and igniting every part of her, gliding over her breasts, her hips, and across the sensitive folds of her body, until she was so tightly strung she felt as though she were going to explode.
And then, this time, just when she was hovering on that precipice again, he plunged deep, tearing away her last vestiges of self-control and unleashing a tornado inside her. She bucked and gasped beneath him as the orgasm rushed through her, clamping down on her so ruthlessly she knew she would be lost forever in his arms and in his lovemaking.
"Bryn." Cash went rigid, plunging into her as the orgasm caught him, sweeping them both into a swirling whirlwind of ecstasy. She clung to him, holding on for dear life, losing herself completely in him, in their joint orgasm, and in the connection that made her complete.
* * *
Happiness was a state that Cash had never been able to comprehend. It had always felt superficial and shallow, a mirage created by naive idealists who wanted to torment people into striving for an impossible state. But as he lay in his bed with Bryn in his arms, he was filled with a sense of satisfaction and peace that had to be pretty damn close to happiness.
She was on her side, her head resting on the front of his shoulder, tucked against his side. He tightened his arm around her, pulling her more tightly against him, and then pressed a kiss to the top of her head. He loved the feel of her body against his, and he knew he would never get tired of it.
Ever.
They'd fallen asleep after making love, and it was late evening now. Christmas Eve. Thirty-six hours from when she was supposed to show up in court.
"Cash?"
He smiled at the sleepiness in her voice. "Yes, sweetheart?"
"You know I love you, right?"
His smile faded, and his throat tightened up. They'd told each other a thousand times that they loved each other when they were younger. He was so used to saying it with her that it just slipped off his tongue without thought. But the way she'd just said it was different. It was more, the kind of love that a man would never walk away from, the kind of love that deserved to be honored and cherished. The kind of love that involved long, leisurely nights of hot, sweaty bodies, not innocent hugs of friendship. The kind of love that could destroy someone.
She poked him in the chest. "Hello? Are you there?"
"Yeah." He rolled her onto her back and settled on top of her, bracing himself just enough to keep his weight from crushing her. He tangled his fingers in her hair, studying her carefully. Her hair was lighter than it had been, and longer. Her blue eyes were the same, but there was more weight in them now. Sadness. A grim awareness of the dark side of life. She was his Bryn, but there were shadows on her soul that hadn't been there before...as there were on his.
She smiled, her face contented and peaceful. "You look very handsome."
He grinned. "That's better than beautiful, but not rugged enough."
"You're a lethal, dangerous predator who looks good enough to spend the night with?"
His smile faded at her joke. "Too accurate."
She sighed and locked her hands behind his neck, resting her forearms on his shoulders. "So, what next?"
"With us?" He wanted to snatch her up, throw her into the back of his truck, and disappear with her...but he couldn't. Not with Jace's life at stake. And the truth was that Damien still wanted her dead. She was tangled up in the grittiness of his life, and he hadn't figured out a solution.
"With Jace. With Damien."
He dropped his head, burying his face in the crook of her neck. "I don't know." While she'd slept, he'd lain beside her, wracking his brain for a solution that would clear them from Damien, but nothing worked. Even killing Damien wouldn't free Jace, and the man was too smart to be trapped in a confession. "I don't fucking know what to do."
She wrapped her arms around his head, cradling him to her. "I'm not afraid," she said softly. "I'm not afraid to die, so don't worry about that."
"What?" He lifted his head, staring at her incredulously. "You don't want me to worry about the possibility of you being killed? Are you kidding?"
She blinked. "When I told the police I'd seen Jace kill Melissa, I knew that I would most likely be killed by Jace's pack. I accepted that." She touched his face. "I've found you again, Cash. If I die, I won't be alone now."
"Jesus." He rolled off her, too tense to lie still. The idea of her dying was like an electric shock to his system, a threat so severe that he could barely think. He'd just found her. He'd just claimed her. She couldn't die. Sweat broke out on his forehead at the idea of her being killed. "Don't talk like that." He grabbed his jeans and yanked them on, adrenaline racing through him as he fought for control. His wolf was raging, desperate to be unleashed to protect his mate. He could feel his temperature rising, his skin prickling, his muscles burning with the need to shift and defend that which was his.
"Cash?" Bryn was staring at him, her face pale. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing." He turned away, bracing his hands on the counter of his kitchenette, fighting for control. He bowed his head and closed his eyes, gritting his teeth as he tried to clear his mind. But his wolf was angry now, enraged, on the defensive. The mere mention of her death had sent it into a rage, and it wasn't backing down.
Bryn touched his back, making him jump. He spun around and grabbed her upper arms, yanking her toward him. He crushed her against him, kissing her fiercely, pouring his wolf's anger into the kiss, claiming her, showing his wolf that she was safe, that she was his, that she wasn't in danger.
Bryn made a noise of protest and pushed at his chest. "Your skin is on fire," she gasped, her eyes wide. "I feel like you're going to burn me."
"It's my wolf." It was all he could say through his clenched teeth as he kissed her again, hard, ruthlessly. "He won't let you die." He backed her against the counter, his body hard and taut, his wolf raging to be unleashed. "I can't hold it back," he gritted out. "Son of a bitch."
Bryn grabbed his shoulders. "What do you need?"
"You." His voice was a guttural growl, his wolf fighting to get out. He knew what happened when the wolf came out on its own. It was bad, so fucking bad. He'd have no control. He'd be owned by the animal. "I need to show my wolf you're safe. That you're mine. I need to fucking mark you."
Her eyes widened. "Okay."
He fisted her hair, his vision starting to shift to black and white. "I'm not going to be gentle." He had only a minute, maybe two, until he lost the battle he hadn't lost in years.
She lifted her chin, defiance blazing in her blue eyes. "I'm not a porcelain doll, Cash. You won't break me." Before he could make a decision, she grabbed his face and dragged him down to her, kissing him fiercely.
Her kiss unleashed the predator. With a furious growl, he spun her around and shoved her up against the counter. His head was spinning, his mind fragmenting, spiraling into that place where sense and logic were crushed by animal instincts. He shoved his pelvis against her ass, cupping her breast as he fumbled for the fly on his jeans, trying to get his cock free. It took seconds, precious desperate seconds, but then his jeans were unfastened.
He grabbed her hips and dragged her back toward him. She came willingly, and she was wet and hot when he sheathed himself inside her. His body went rigid, screaming for release as he drove deep, gripping her hips with a frantic need he couldn't control. She braced her hands on the counter, arching back, encouraging him, calling him to her, pushing back toward him as he drove into her.
He grabbed her hair, pulling her head back toward him as he drove into her, pummeling her more fiercely than he could control. He knew he was being too rough, but he couldn't stop himself. His wolf was in control now, needing to dominate her and claim her. His fingers sank into the soft folds between her legs, and she gasped, her body convulsing instantly as the orgasm took her. The instant she bucked against him, he lost control, and plunged deep, his seed spilling into her with such fierceness that he roared her name as he came.
It was rough. It was brutal. It sated his wolf.
Gripping her hips, he collapsed against her, resting his cheek against her back as the orgasm shuddered its last gasp and left them both. They were both slick with sweat, and he could feel her legs trembling. He wrapped his arm around her waist to support her, guilt tearing through him as he eased himself out of her. "I hurt you, didn't I?" He swore. "Fuck, Bryn, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean—"
"Don't." She turned around to face him, sweat beading on her breasts. "You didn't hurt me."
She looked so vulnerable and innocent that something inside him cracked. Her hair was streaked with sweat, and her hands were red from griping the counter so tightly. What the fuck had he been thinking, claiming her? Dragging her into his life? She deserved so much more. He spread his hands, feeling lost and shitty. "That was my wolf. That's what I am. I—" He ran his hands through his hair, trying to pull himself together. "I didn't know it would be like that. I thought I had control. I—"
"It's okay." She put her finger over his mouth, silencing him. "You didn't hurt me. I love the fact I helped you regain control of the wolf. You did, didn't you? That worked?"
"Yeah, it did, but I don't want you to become some fuck-bunny for my wolf. You deserve more than that—"
"Shut up, Cash."
He shut up, surprised into silence.
"There's no way I could ever feel like some piece of ass to you. You're not broken, but you have a dark side. I can help with that. It's okay. I've always been here for you." She shrugged, and her cheeks flushed. "It was kind of hot, actually."
He stared at her in disbelief. "Really?"
She nodded. "I admit I was a little freaked out by how hot your skin was at first, but..." She grinned. "I adapted."
Slowly, the faintest hint of a smile curved the corner of his mouth. "You're serious. That didn't...scare you? Disgust you?"
She rolled her eyes. "Oh, for heaven's sake, Cash. Seriously? Get over your drama. It was awesome." She grabbed his face and kissed him hard, with just enough sass to let him know that she meant it.
Relief poured through him, and he slid his arms around her, kissing her back. "It's your fault, you know," he said, as he kissed his way down the side of her neck. He still felt guilty as hell. He didn't know how to make it right. He had a bad feeling that this was it, his last stand with her, because he couldn't do that to her again. "You started talking that shit about how you didn't care if you died. Don't do that again, unless you want to see me turned into a four-legged demon. Got it?"
She laughed as he scooped her up. "I might say it if I want rough, hot sex, though, just to see."
He raised his brows at the serious undertone to her comment. "You liked it."
She grinned. "I did. I mean, making love in the bed was amazing, too, but there was something about being pinned against the counter that was just…sexy as hell."
His cock immediately got hard again, and he dragged her closer, exhilaration rushing through him. "Then we might need to do it again—"
A sudden, frantic beeping cut through his comment. He swore and spun away from her, lunging for his computer. He quickly called up the screens, targeting the area that had set off his alarms. "Get dressed," he said, staring at the data on the screen. "Someone's in the tunnel, heading right for us, and they're moving fast."