“What are we to do now?” Robert asked.

They were lying in Simon’s bed, the three of them. Christy was between Simon and Robert, her head on Simon’s shoulder. Robert had his head propped up on his arm, cheek resting on his palm. He’d taken Christy’s hair out of the braid and now was smoothing it out across the pillow. Occasionally he glanced up to give Simon a sleepy, satisfied smile which Simon returned. But his question was one Simon had been dreading.

“I don’t know,” Simon answered honestly. At his response, Christy lifted her head from his shoulder and frowned at him. “I thought you were asleep,” he said.

“No,” Robert told him, chuckling. “She has this breathy little snore when she’s asleep.” He imitated it.

“Robert Manderley,” Christy said in shocked disapproval. “I do not. Take it back.” Robert just made a face.

Simon forced a little laugh. Christy turned back, and he could see she wasn’t fooled. She put her head down on his shoulder again and rubbed her hand along the top of his stomach, the firm line of muscle that separated chest from belly. She seemed fascinated by it. Simon was a little fascinated with Robert’s, to be honest. He was the fittest man Simon had ever seen.

Christy snuggled closer and her breasts pressed against his side and the new distraction pulled his mind back to her. She felt soft and smooth and utterly feminine, and she smelled divine.

“Simon?” she asked. He glanced down and her face was tilted up so she could see him. She was watching him with a worried, expectant sort of expression.

“Sorry,” he said. “I’ve done it again, haven’t I?” He sighed. “Ever since I got back from Africa I frequently tend to get lost in my thoughts and miss the conversation around me. I don’t mean to be rude.”

“That’s all right,” Christy told him.

“No, it really isn’t,” Simon said. “And I know it. I can’t help it. Getting lost in my own thoughts is how I made it through that nightmare. I guess it’s a habit I can’t break.”

“I just asked what your feelings were about us, about where we go from here,” Christy said. “And just so you know, I’m not willing to watch you walk away again. I don’t think it’s in your best interest, and I definitely know it isn’t in mine or Robert’s.”

“Isn’t it?” Simon asked sadly. He hugged her tightly for a moment and then let loose, keeping one arm around her while he stared at the ceiling. “There’s Christian to consider. It isn’t just the three of us.”

“Do you dislike children?” Robert asked with a frown. He stopped combing Christy’s hair with his fingers.

“No, of course not,” Simon assured him. “I rather like them, actually. But I didn’t lay with Christy for a reason. I don’t want to get her pregnant.”

“Why not?” Robert asked. His casual acceptance of the possibility of such a situation astounded Simon.

“Is that what you want? Your wife heavy with another man’s child?”

“It wouldn’t be another man’s child,” Robert said. “It would be your child. That’s completely different. And it would be Christy’s, too. Any child Christy bears is perfect, as far as I’m concerned, and I’d be quite thrilled if she bore yours, frankly. I think you’d make remarkable children together.”

“That’s not what I mean,” Simon told him.

“Then what did you mean?” Christy asked.

She pulled away from him despite his attempts to hold her, and sat next to him. Her leg was still touching his, so it wasn’t a complete abandonment. He didn’t think Christy was capable of abandonment, actually. Perhaps she’d known too much of it herself and so was determined not to make someone suffer it on her account.

He put his hand on her thigh and she smiled at him, a quick, familiar sort of smile. The kind he’d seen his friends share. The kind that said don’t worry, I’m still here and I haven’t forgotten about you. The kind of casual smile he’d always wanted from someone, a level of intimacy he had aspired to. What a complete and utter fool he was for these two.

Robert didn’t move. He just continued to lie there, entirely relaxed as he watched them. Instead of reassuring him, Robert’s apparent acceptance of this intimacy caused Simon’s muscles to clench in distress.

“Look at us,” Simon said, pointing between him and Robert. “We look nothing alike. If Christy were to have my child, it would be painfully obvious. No one would mistake him for Robert’s, not like Christian.”

“I will shut down anyone who has the temerity to ask questions,” Robert stated unequivocally. “Any child of Christy’s is a child of mine. Our vows make it so, as well as our tender feelings. I imagine it would be the same with your child as it is with Christian. And I know that you would feel the same. You don’t know him, but I’m sure that in time you will care for Christian as I do.”

Simon’s heart was racing. He resisted the urge to get up and leave, to run away—from them, from his feelings, from the future, from commitment. It had always worked for him in the past.

But wasn’t this what he wanted? Wasn’t it what he’d dreamed about in Africa? A life with Christy? And his new feelings for Robert weren’t a passing fancy. They felt nothing like the shallow infatuations he’d had in the past.

For some reason known only to God and perhaps, someday, Simon, these two people had broken through decades of defenses and stolen his heart. And here, now, they were offering things he never thought he’d have. Things he thought he didn’t deserve.

“Why are we talking about children?” he asked.

“Because it is a consequence of what we are doing, or are going to do,” Christy said. “I, of all people, ought to know that.”

“Always practical,” Simon said, casting a half smile her way.

“Always, from now on,” Christy said. “You’re right. I have Christian to consider now. Every decision I make—”

“We make,” Robert interrupted to say.

“We make, has to be made with his best interests in mind.” She looked at Simon. “This”—she pointed at each of them—“was not done lightly. We both considered the ramification and made our decision based on what we thought was best for all involved, Christian included. Isn’t that right?” she asked Robert.

“Yes,” he said. “At one point, when you first came back from Africa, I thought that I would have to give Christy up. I thought that she would be happiest with you, and I was willing to let her and Christian go with you. I would not have even considered it if I did not find you worthy.”

Simon ran his hands through his hair and pulled his leg away from Christy’s in the guise of bending his knees. “I think you both give me too much credit,” he said. “I have a rather colorful past, you know.”

“So I gathered from things that others have said. From what you said, earlier,” Robert replied cautiously. “I think you should know I have a very colorless past. What we did tonight was…quite extraordinary for me.”

“What we did tonight was very tame,” Simon said with a laugh. “But…” He rolled over to face Robert and mimicked his position. “I found it more satisfying than the most meaningless debauched evening I have ever wasted in my past.”

“I’m afraid I’m like Robert,” Christy admitted. Her cheeks were flushed a becoming pink. “Although I have a bit more experience, it hasn’t exactly been full of variety.” She bit her lip in embarrassment. “What you two did tonight is most certainly the naughtiest thing I’ve ever done.”

“Are you both in a hurry to learn all you can from the infamously debauched Simon Gantry?” Simon asked wryly. “I’ve had quite a few people seek me out for just such a purpose.”

“Oh, Simon,” Christy said sadly. She took his hand and squeezed it. He held it tight. “I’m so very sorry.”

“I don’t think anyone has every been sorry for my sordid sexual escapades before,” he said. “This is a new experience.” He was trying to make light of it, but the fact was her sympathy lightened a burden he hadn’t even realized he’d been carrying.

“I’m sorry, too,” Robert said. “I’ve only known Christy, and now you. And both experiences have been sensual and satisfying, but also wondrous because I shared them with you two. I cannot imagine being so vulnerable with a stranger, or experiencing such joy and not have it be a sharing of souls as well as bodies.”

Simon’s heart did an odd sort of stutter that made him lightheaded and short of breath. “Is that what that was?” he asked quietly. “A sharing of souls?”

“Yes,” Christy answered. “For me as well. The first time we were together I felt it, Simon, though I’m not sure you did.”

He covered his eyes with his hand because they were burning. “I have not been with anyone else since you, Christy. Not willingly.” He took his hand away and met her surprised gaze. “I know everyone thinks I have. I let them think it. I tried, but I couldn’t go through with it. It wasn’t the same. All I could see was your face.”

He glanced briefly at Robert and then back at Christy. “And now I know why. Now I know why I saw your face in my dreams every night. Because you have a part of my soul and I have a part of yours. Inside me.”