The week passed quickly as orders and business began picking up. A long look at her spreadsheets had been depressing since they were way lower than what she’d gotten last Christmas. Still, with all the social media hype she and Mason were both garnering, most of the traffic that came to their corner of Main Street went into both stores. The number of times she saw customers with Mason’s distinctive chocolate boxes or little paper shopping bags in hand was reassuring.
After getting the basic cookies baked and iced for her regular inventory, Ruth got started painting her display cookie. Using a yellow food-coloring marker, she sketched out the figure of Santa Clause in a cozy chair eating a cookie. Beside him, she drew in a table and a cookie box that would eventually have Sugar Lip’s logo on it. It was going to take a fine-tipped paintbrush and a steady hand, but she was up for the challenge. In fact, she was excited about it.
Using food color gels like watercolor paint and diluting them with alcohol like clear vanilla to paint designs on cookies was one of her favorite decorating techniques. On this cookie, she planned to use deep, vivid colors and gold luster dust on a few details to make the cookie dynamic and elegant.
She worked off and on throughout the morning, helping with customers whenever things got busy, and pausing to paint for a moment when they calmed down. But always, always, half of her mind was caught up in thoughts of Mason. How could it not be?
When he looked at her the way he did, and reached for her hand anytime they were close, it created a buzz and flutter in her chest, making it feel like a net full of honey bees.
The question was, could she let herself fall for him? It felt like such a risk since she could imagine a hundred ways she could end up hurt.
But slowly and surely, she was beginning to trust that this was something worth taking a chance on. There was no doubt she missed him when he wasn’t right beside her or that she wanted to kiss him again.
In fact, after the Christmas concert Sunday night, she’d very nearly asked him to kiss her. She had only held herself back because she knew if she took that step forward, there would be no way back.
Maybe she’d already gone too far.
She looked at the clock on the wall and saw that it was noon. The thought flashed through her mind that it would be fun to surprise Mason with lunch. He was making her dinner the next night, so it seemed really unfair that he would be feeding her three times before she’d fed him once. Decision made, she went through to tell Crystal.
“Hey, I’m going to go out for lunch. Think you can cover things for me for a while?”
Crystal nodded wryly. “Yeah. Even with things picking up, we’re never too busy for me to handle alone.”
Ruth frowned at the display cases where the trays were still mostly full. “Well, luckily I’ve got three big orders for Christmas cookies this week. Good thing my custom orders can help float the retail business, huh?”
“Yep. I didn’t mean to depress you. Go get something yummy to eat. And go share it with that yummy man next door.”
Laughing, Ruth headed to the back. “You make him sound like a hamburger.”
As she drove back after getting takeout from one of her favorite Chinese restaurants, she took a stream of deep breaths to relax. Even though her attention had strayed so heavily toward Mason, worry over her business had weighed on her and stressed her out. Sales were fluctuating too much for her to make sense of them—sky high one day if something on social media about her business caught peoples’ attention, almost dead if it had been a while.
With a plastic sack full of little take-out boxes, she parked her car and went in Mason’s back door instead of hers. Inside, she put the bag of food in his office because there didn’t seem to be anywhere to eat in his pristine and sanitized workspace, then went up front to find him. As she went through the swinging door, she saw Brianna leap forward into Mason’s arms. He grinned down at her as he hugged her back and swung her around in a circle.
Ruth stopped and watched with a sharp, sinking feeling in her gut. She let the door shut again and fled.
Before she got to the outside door, Mason called after her, “Ruth?”
She paused and took a deep breath. Closing her eyes, she composed herself the best she could and turned around. Still, she found it impossible to meet his eyes.
“Why are you leaving without telling me you were here?”
“I, uh, saw you were busy. I didn’t want to interrupt.”
“Oh, yeah.” Mason shifted and crossed his arms as if he was uncomfortable. “I guess you saw our celebration just now, huh?”
Feeling strangely numb inside, she nodded. “What were you celebrating?” She found the strength to look him in the eyes then, searching for answers hidden in their dark blue depths.
“Ruth, I got the bid for the ball.”
The last of her strength crumbled to dust. She’d told herself that when this moment came that she would be happy for him. But she hadn’t known that it would come after seeing him hugging a woman who was everything she wasn’t. The picture of Brianna’s slim figure in his arms, being lifted and swung around—like he could do with a woman who weighed so little—still burned in her mind, branding her with self-loathing. And now she had to face the reality of losing her most important visibility platform to him. She needed time to process it all.
But she had to say something. “Congratulations. You’ll impress everyone there.”
“I’m sorry, Ruth. I wish there was some way for us to both get the job.”
She shook her head and looked down. He couldn’t see the tears gathering in her eyes. “I brought you some lunch. Sweet and sour chicken and Mongolian beef. And there’s enough for Brianna too.”
As she started to leave, he touched her shoulder. “You’re not going to stay and eat with me?”
She tried to smile, but it was a poor effort. “I don’t have time today, sorry. But, um…I hope you like your food. And good luck getting ready for the ball. I know it will be a lot of work.”
And then, like a cat running off to hide and lick its wounds, she hurried out, not stopping when he called her name. But he was fast, and got to the door at the same time she did. With his hand at her waist, he bent over her shoulder and said, “Wait, please. I can’t stand to see you hurting.”
“I need some time.” Her voice broke and she took in a shuddery breath. “Please.”
His hand ran up and down her side in a gesture of comfort. “Okay.”
As soon as he spoke, she fled. She burst into her kitchen seconds later, and when the door shut behind her, gave a gasp, then shuddered as the storm of her emotions finally broke.
“What’s wrong?” Crystal asked, running toward her from the other end of the room. “Ruth, what happened?”
“Mason got the bid.” She couldn’t tell her the rest or she’d sound like an idiot. She was an idiot. But in that moment, she couldn’t help it and she didn’t care.
“Okay, but you’ve been expecting that.”
“I know. It’s just that… Crystal, I need to go home. Will you close things down for me?”
“Close early on a Saturday before Christmas? Are you sure?”
“I don’t care. Stay as long as you want, but I have to go. Okay?”
“I understand. I’ll take care of everything here. But call me if you need me. Promise?”
“Yes.” Ruth got her keys and coat, and left, running to her car so that there was no way she would chance seeing Mason again. But when she thought of the fact that she’d have to see him again soon, she burst out crying with another sob. He’d be there every day, right next door. And she loved him.
And she’d just messed everything up.