Chapter Nine
Despite the nervous glances from the rest of the gang, Hoodoo fairly beamed when he saw her. She wasn’t exactly sure how she felt about that. Right now it was somewhat intimidating. The man could have all the exuberance of a Great Dane puppy.
“Listen.” Tracy took a deep breath and let it out slowly, trying to ignore the interested looks from the rest. “I was… rude. And I am sorry, I really am. I never should have slapped you. I’m just getting to where I don’t even want to hear about…” He went into debt with the mafia for you, don’t sound ungrateful. “…anything anymore, I just closed off. I reacted badly and I do appreciate your attempt to warn me. I actually do.” She looked around at the others, “I suppose that goes for all of you. I do feel very grateful that you’re looking out for…” the damn bike “… me, thank you.”
Each of them nodded, but their expressions were wary. She’d put a gap between her and them and they were taking their clues from the leader of the … damn, there goes that song again.
“Tracy,” Hoodoo stood and lay a hand on her shoulder. It was easy to forget how big the man was, as though her mind just could not wrap around the size of him without actually seeing him. Right now she felt like she was wearing him. Seriously. Her entire shoulder was covered. Completely. “I didn’t mean to creep you out, it was just a coincidence, no one was spying, I swear.”
Tracy nodded, not sure she believed that entirely. “Yeah, I realized that, eventually. Once I was able to let go of the anger, I figured it out.” She paused and the group seemed to be searching as one for something to say to break the uncomfortable silence.
“Well,” Tracy said, forcing a half smile to her face. She decided that it would be best to go back to the RV and feast on PB&J if she could find the jar of jam. Or maybe instant noodles, which might be easier. Suddenly she’d lost her taste for hot dogs, especially if eating them meant staying around where she was clearly not wanted. At least it wouldn’t be as awkward.
“Hey, Hoodoo man.” The girl piped up, Sal or Val or something. “Why don’ you take the lady for a drink? Huh? We got this.”
Tracy forced her expression to remain neutral but she could have kissed the girl. It was an interesting image. She almost laughed thinking about the reaction the boys would have to that. She looked up, noticing Hoodoo’s cautious look. So she wasn’t the only one who was wary. “I would like that,” he said carefully, waiting for her reaction.
Go for it. What do you have to lose?
She honestly didn’t want to answer that question right now. She’d lost a lot of things when they’d broken up. Her heart. Her peace of mind. Her self-respect.
“Me too.” Tracy said, her own answer coming after too long of a delay. “If that’s an invitation.”
“Probably the best one you’re gonna get,” one of the two who looked so much alike said.
“Boss isn’t big on flowery speeches,” said the other.
She shot them a glance. Sarcastic? Or sincere?
Quit analyzing. Just…take the plunge!
“Well, in that case…” Tracy took another deep breath and this time when she let the air out, she nodded. Focused. Determined. How bad could it get? “How could a girl resist?” she asked, with a smile so forced her face hurt. Yeah, she could do this. She looked at his bike shining in the afternoon sun like a suddenly remembered dream and asked shyly, “Back seat still open? I don’t have my ride with me.”
Hoodoo smiled. “It’s still yours. That don’ change.”
Tracy smiled at the girl in the vest of the Gilas and looked away before a glimmer of a tear betrayed her. It mattered who sat there. To him. It mattered that she sat there. With a combination of pride and an odd touch of shyness, she swung her leg over the bike and waited while he did the same. For him, it was more like stepping over a low barrier, but he fired the bike up and sat. The whole bike settled a little lower with his weight. He truly was a giant of a man. Tracy settled herself behind him, taking comfort and pride in the position. It wasn’t that she couldn’t ride; if she couldn’t maybe none of this would have happened, certainly she and Hoodoo wouldn’t have been together. But this place was hers even though she’d rejected it. Even though they’d broken up, it was still her place.
Hoodoo dropped the shifter into gear and they slipped through the dirt where the stand was located and dropped smoothly into the steady stream of bikes running in and out and through town. Hoodoo waggled the bike, moving his hips from side-to-side and letting the bike weave in a tight pattern as they drove. She’d asked him once why he did that, with a mischievous grin he admitted that it was just fun. In some ways, he’d been able to hang on to the boy that still loved a little trick and playing in the open sunshine. It was part of what she’d loved about him.
They parked a fair distance from the bar she’d seen him at the previous night. It was still fairly early, but during the rally, beer was a breakfast food and breakfast was served all day. Hoodoo killed the engine and for a moment, Tracy rebelled against getting up again. He sat between her thighs, his waist in her hands. Riding alone wasn’t nearly so pleasant. Some, like that girl who’d helped her out, would prefer to have their own ride. Others might even look down on a girl who liked to be behind anyone. But to Tracy it was intimate and public all at once. Her legs ached to have him between them again.
Hoodoo locked the ignition and they walked down to the bar. Tracy felt a sting of envy for the ease in which he did that. He had a beautiful bike; it had a lot of work in it. The bike had a certain style all its own, and his artwork was gorgeous. But when he got somewhere it wasn’t a classic, one-of-a-kind jewel that had be protected and wrapped in bubble wrap to keep everything safe and sanitary.
She envied that. She never realized just how much until she’d lost that ability.
They were almost at the bar when she felt his hand brush hers. In his case, his hand was twice her size, and it always made her feel like a little girl when she held his hand while walking. Not that it was a bad feeling. She rather liked the way she’d always felt protected and safe when she was with him. Not that she couldn’t hold her own when she had to – but she was able to relax more with him. There was no need to be super woman 24/7 when he was around and it was a nice break. She supposed in an ideal world, she wouldn’t have needed to ever feel like she had to be on her guard at all, but she’d grown up in Chicago and was a realist.
Besides, if there were no more dragons, then there would be no more need for dragon slayers. So living in a world that was a little bit dangerous felt…more fun. And having a giant on your side, gave you a lot of freedom to take on dragons for yourself.
So she took his hand almost out of reflex, and smiled. It was wrong, it was stupid and it wouldn’t/couldn’t end well. But it felt right. Being tucked in at his side like that, her hand in his was Christmas and coming home.
I just want to enjoy this. Tonight I’m going to have this much.
Hoodoo entered first, his bulk pressing a hole in the crowd for her to follow in his wake. He didn’t let go of her hand. Neither did she.
It was the little things that meant so much. There were men and women making out on barstools, in the street, on bikes, on every surface, but somehow holding hands while walking was a quieter, softer version of lovemaking, the gentle intertwining of fingers a silent intimacy that went almost entirely unnoticed. Especially in a crowd like this.
There weren’t any chairs left in the place, so they ordered a couple of beers and left to drink them on the front porch, sitting on the railing by the street.
“Huh,” she said after a minute, nudging him and pointing, “Wonder what happened there?”
“Where?”
“That upright… post thing that looks like it’s broken in two. Was there a fight?”
Hoodoo seemed to choke on his beer. “Ah… might have been? Maybe?” He took another cautious sip. “Kind of reminds me I need to talk to someone later.”
His expression was carefully neutral. Too carefully neutral. She opened her mouth to speak, then closed it again.
“I miss you,” he said into the pause as more bikes rolled past. She wondered if she knew any of the riders. If her being out here with the most visible guy of the rally would somehow get back to her father. And what he would think. The object of going to Sturgis was to be seen at Sturgis, but just now, Tracy wished she was less visible. This time it was her turn to get stuck mid-swallow. She slowly lay her hand on his thigh. It was like resting on a fallen tree.
“Yeah.” She said and took a deep breath. He deserved to hear it, not matter how hard it was to say. “I miss you, too.”
As the sun began to trace long shadows across the road and the bikes turned on headlights to illuminate the endless steel dragon that prowled the streets for ten days each year, Hoodoo raised his arm and, bit by bit, lay it across her back, his hand resting on her hip.
Tracy stiffened and took a drink, thinking about this. The problem was she liked it. It felt good to have his arm there. Safe. Warm. Trying not to overthink things, she shifted so that she leaned against him, and rested her head on his chest.
They leaned against the shadows of the day and watched the lights parade by them.