I DON’T WANT TONIGHT TO be over yet.
My words replay as I drive over to Nori’s. I shake my head for the hundredth time over those words.
Tonight has to end because I have to be up early tomorrow. I never stay out late. Neither does Nori, my poor cousin.
What a trooper she is. It was only nine-thirty when we drove off, but when she says she doesn’t sleep, she doesn’t. Even with her rock crystals. Insomnia and her have a very intimate relationship. One that dates back to eighth grade. She’s a semester away from being a high school graduate.
She’s used to be a very light sleeper. Any shifting or movement would stir her awake.
Her mom says it’s because when she was a baby she refused to fall asleep in fear that she’d miss out on something. It doesn’t help that when a Lawson baby is born it’s a family affair. People fly in from out of town, grandparents camp out in the guest bedroom. It’s basically a party for weeks.
Especially when Nori was born. My aunt Hilary got pregnant by her boyfriend—a guy everyone thought was great, until he found out he was going to be a dad. Then he took off, leaving my aunt pregnant and alone.
I don’t remember much, since I was toddler, but when the family tells stories, they share so many from when they all came into town for Nori’s birth. I still tell her to not let the popularity go to her head—I’m still the favorite grandchild.
She might’ve been a light sleeper when she was younger, but over the years that changed. Once she took up diving, exhaustion become a frequent visitor. Tonight has been no different.
A minute after Xavier put her in the car, she was out.
Sleeping and making these weird little noises.
She doesn’t even wake up when I pull in her driveway, putting her car in park. I barely have the keys out when the passenger door opens and Zay is scooping my cousin up, carrying her to the front door.
He doesn’t put her down once.
Not as I am unlocking the door.
Not when I am guiding us to her room.
He only puts her down when we get to her bed.
Nori doesn’t stir as he gently places a blanket over her, passed out cold. Something I’ve never seen from my cousin.
Something else I’ve never seen is the look on Xavier’s face. It’s so foreign on him, I don’t even know how to describe it.
Soft.
Sweet.
Caring.
I bite my tongue from saying anything as we leave her house and get in his car.
Neither of us say anything on the ride back to the bar.
Not until I’m about to get out of the car.
I give him a look. “What’s going on with you and my cousin?”
He doesn’t answer for a beat. The low music cooing from the radio fills the silence until he says, “I’m worried about her.”
“Me too,” I admit, turning in my seat toward him.
“She’s lost weight.” He sounds helpless. “When I was helping her out of the bar, I felt how thin she’s gotten.”
My stomach clenches. Weight has been a hard topic for my cousin. She eats, just not enough. As an athlete, as a diver, food is really important. But Nori is spending so much time chasing her dream, she forgets to stock up on calories.
“We have to help her,” he continues.
Nori also pushes herself hard. Harder than she probably should. She’s told me she does it to distract from her problems, and from what Zay says next, it’s clear she’s told him too.
“She needs a therapist. Someone who can help her with all the shit in her head. She won’t talk about it with me.” The last part he practically growls.
“Believe me. Unless she wants to address the problem, it won’t do any good. Her mom doesn’t have the money anyway.” Nori wouldn’t want to see anyone at the hospital where her mom works, either. I remember what it was like being forced to see a therapist after my accident. I didn’t want help. I didn’t want to talk.
And I didn’t. Not for several sessions.
My therapist didn’t force me to open up. To talk about anything. She didn’t pressure or push. She waited.
Waited until I was ready.
“She’s going to pass out from hunger one day while she’s on the board and get seriously hurt.”
“As much as I love your concern, why are you stressing yourself out over this? I didn’t think you and Nori were that close.” Please don’t be that close. I can’t have them be that close. I love Xavier. I really do. He’s a great friend, but he travels everywhere, going on adventures—chasing waves and not taking names.
If he makes my cousin fall in love with him, he’ll break her heart.
And then I’ll have to break him.
“Fucking hell, Emery. Your cousin is slowly killing herself! You should be more concerned if I didn’t care.”
True, true, true.
I don’t think she’s killing herself. She’s forgetting to eat and has an extremely fast metabolism. Tomorrow, I’ll just go over there and hang out with her, taking her to lunch and dinner. Xavier doesn’t need to worry. Nori will be fine.
I hope.
“I think Xavier has a thing for my cousin,” I say in lieu of a greeting as Bash opens the door, stepping aside to let me in.
“Hello to you, too.” He chuckles.
“Hi.” I turn around, hands on my hips. “What do you think?”
“About Xavier and Nori?”
I nod.
“Aren’t they a couple?” His joke is not appreciated.
I growl, spinning around to walk into his living room. Bash lives in such a dude’s place. Minimal decorations, a three-seater couch, two recliners, and a TV. Aside from a coffee table, the only other place to eat is the island bar in his kitchen.
He needs a lot of help with decorating.
But not right now.
There are more important things happening.
Plus all the stores are closed.
“No! They aren’t. As far as I knew, they only talked when we hung out. That’s what she does with Geer. She says she doesn’t even want to date. Says she doesn’t have time. He’s going to distract her.”
“Is that what he’s going to do?”
“And break her heart. And make her hate men. And—”
“And?”
“Take her virginity.”
“Em,” he says, but I don’t want to hear how ridiculous I’m being. I don’t need to be told. I’m well aware of it. Doesn’t mean I’ll stop my tangent. And it’s not just Nori I’m worried about. I don’t want Xavier to get hurt either. I love Xavier, he’s one of my ride or dies, and Nori has just as much power to hurt him as he does her.
It’s just Nori’s like my little sister. I’ve been protective of her since she was little.
I nibble on my bottom lip. “And he’s older than her. Why does he want to get with a high schooler? Can’t he get girls his own age? Nori already deals with dipshits in high school. She doesn’t need one in the form of a twenty-two-year-old.”
I remember this one guy she told me about in her chemistry class last year. He’d tried calling her all the time while he was jerking off. It was gross. But she refused to give me a name.
Which was safer for the dipshit.
“Am I a dipshit?” he asks and I look at him.
“Whaa?”
“I’m a twenty-two-year-old guy who likes a girl younger than him. So, am I a dipshit?”
Pause. A moment to acknowledge that Bash just admitted he likes me.
At least, it better be me. Or else I will smack some sense upside his head.
Okay, moment over but not forgotten.
“No, but would you still like me if I was seventeen and in high school?”
“Depends.” He moves closer to me, gripping my arm and pulling us toward the couch. I tuck my legs under me and he spreads his legs apart. “If you acted like a girl who’s seventeen, then no. But if you were mature for your age, probably. Nori doesn’t seem like a kid; she’s three years younger than you, right?”
I hold up two fingers. She’s two years younger than me.
“Well, no offense, Firecracker, but you act more immature than she does.”
“How do you know? She was practically napping the entire night.” I give him a look, then a smile. “I do act like a child. But what’s wrong with not growing up when you can be young forever?”
“Never said there was. You just asked if I would date a seventeen-year-old and I’m telling you my answer.”
I pout. “It would have been better if you just said no.”
“What’s the harm if he does like Nori?” Bash pulls me closer, my shoulder pressing into his side. Just like tonight at trivia. “You said it yourself, she doesn’t date because she’s too busy.”
I concede with a nod. Too tired to talk about this anymore. Plus, there are other things that we can talk about, instead.
“So, you like me?”
The look he gives me sends a shiver down my spine.