I closed my eyes tight and opened them again. Roman was still there. I parted my lips to tell him to leave, but no words came out. He shouldn't be here.

"Leave now," Bastian said, his voice sharp and commanding.

"I'm not leaving without Aris."

Roman had his hands up in front of them, and whenever a vampire attempted to reach him, he shocked them back with powerful magic. I had never seen him fight like this before. The power pressurized the air in the room.

I attempted to get up again, but the whole room spun, and I fell back down. I had consumed too much tainted blood. Rhino dust would be my guess.

A dark figure arrived, and I recognized the long gown. The witch, Jade. She stared at Roman, and her dark eyes turned a brilliant white looking like Roman’s.

"Leave," I gasped and reached for him, but he didn't see me. He was too busy fighting off the witch in a mental battle, his hand outstretched and brow furrowed.

Grinding my jaw together, I raised up as much as my body would allow and began to crawl toward him.

"Go," I begged. My leg slipped out from under me, and I dropped to my stomach. I tried again, nearly losing the contents of my stomach when I had to crawl over a dead body. The motion was too much for me. My hand slipped in fresh human blood. The crimson color was everywhere. What have I done?

I looked up just in time to see Roman's arm snapped by an invisible force. His left arm followed the motion, and he cried out in pain. With his concentration broken, his body was attacked next. He spiraled backward and crashed into a wall behind him. He fell face forward. He lifted his head, and his haunted gaze met mine.

"I have failed," he whispered, his voice full of agony, but it wasn't because of physical pain.

Bastian squatted down next to him. "Had you left when asked, I might've shown you mercy. But there are rules. You were not invited here, and you have incited violence against vampires. The punishment is instant death."

"No!" I said and tried to move faster, but my body wouldn't respond.

Bastian gripped Roman's neck and snapped it hard to the left. The sound of his spine breaking stabbed at my chest. I was almost to him.

"Roman?"

He didn't respond.

Bastian straightened and looked down at me. "You must know this man. Too bad. If only he would’ve followed our rules. You are one of us now, Aris. You have dined with us and shared in a feasting. Break our trust, and we will kill you and anyone close to you."

He turned his back on me and walked away. I barely registered his words. I couldn't stop staring at Roman's expressionless face. I had caused this.

For the next few hours, I watched Roman's body, hoping to see some kind of change in him. He could become a vampire like me. It was possible, but as more time passed and there was no movement, I knew his time had come. He had not survived the change. Roman was dead.

I rolled onto my back, facing away from him. The pain was excruciating, and I sucked in tiny sips of air. Most of the other vampires had left the room. Whether they returned to wherever it was they lived, or to another part of the house, I couldn't tell. My senses were still dulled from the poisoned blood I had ingested. The only vamps who remained were passed out on the floor, uncontrolled like me. Annabella wasn’t among them.

The human bodies had also been removed. So easy to cover up our sins. It’s like they didn’t even happen. Maybe for them. I would always remember.

At least Bastian was gone. I sat up, my head spinning slightly, but my mind was clear. With clarity came an overwhelming, nearly crushing, feeling of guilt and horror at what had transpired. Why had Roman come here?

I cradled my head in my hands, my elbows resting on my knees. The ache in my heart would surely never go away. I would kill Bastian for this, but I couldn’t forget his words. I believed him when he said the Principes Noctis would kill everyone I know. I needed to be careful.

"You look better," Bastian’s voice said from the doorway. I hadn't heard him come in.

He walked over to me and stared down at Roman's body. "It's unfortunate that this had to happen. If only he would’ve listened to reason."

I came to my feet, swaying slightly. "I want his body."

He studied me carefully, probably wondering how far to push me. "You may take him. A sign of good faith between us, but I want something in return."

"What?" I rubbed my fingers across my forehead trying to soothe a growing headache. I’d never had one as a vampire before. I didn’t think it was possible.

"I want you to bring me Victor. He has betrayed us, and for this, he must suffer death. Our plans for the city have not changed. We want to work with humans, not be their enemy."

"And what of the people who were killed last night? Did you want to work with them?"

He worked his jaw as if trying to keep calm. "Sometimes, Aris, humans are sacrificed for our kind. We are the greater species, after all. But we aren’t monsters. The humans we selected were carefully screened. They had no lives to return to, no homes. We consider our actions toward them mercy."

I lowered my gaze to the floor unable to look at him, or really, unable to look at my reflection in his eyes. “I will bring you Victor but,” an idea came to me, “I want one more thing.”

"You’re testing my patience."

"I want to be the one to kill Victor.”

A smile tickled the corners of his mouth. "Then you shall have your revenge. Bring him tonight, after you've rested."

I bent down and scooped up Roman’s body. He was already stiff and cold as ice. This revelation further pained me. I had hoped he might still change.

Darkness enveloped me, as I carried his body outside. The warm air felt sticky and smothering. The sun would rise soon. Part of me wanted to keep walking, never to return to the darkness again. I was slowly losing the people I cared about. At this rate, who would be left?

The entrance to Ironwood wasn't far away. I continued moving, not attempting to conceal myself even when two vehicles drove past me. Who would they call for help? The police wouldn’t come, not until I gave them back some power.

Roman’s body was heavier in my arms than he should be. I would see him buried back in Louisiana on the Bisou Islands with the Ames de le Terra.

I reached the entrance and carefully maneuvered Roman down below. I attempted to continue, but I dropped to my knees instead. Pain wracked my chest even harder now that I was in my own world. I set his body down and straightened, pacing back-and-forth, my hands opening and closing and hot tears stinging my eyes. I punched at the wall and let out a monstrous roar. I punched it again, over and over, letting out all my pent-up rage, most of it directed at myself, but some of it at Roman. Why had he come?

I slumped against the wall and down to my bum. I had to make this right somehow. I should never have let my bloodlust, no matter how strong, control me.

Rebecca appeared not far from me and gasped when she saw Roman’s body. "What happened?"

I wiped at my eyes. "He showed up at Bastian’s home. Bastian killed him."

She stared at me, aghast. "And you let him?"

"I couldn't stop it," I stuttered. How could I admit the truth?

Her face paled, and she stumbled as if she couldn’t support her weight. "This is all my fault. I should've been with you."

"You are not to blame for this. I bear the responsibility alone." My head jerked up. Maybe there was someone else who held the blame. "Where's Victor?"

"He's back in Ironwood, hiding from the Principes Noctis. They’ve been searching for him." She glanced behind her as if she might see him walking toward us. "He wanted to see you first, but I told him to wait."

I nodded my head in silent agreement, as I came to my feet. I don’t know how I would’ve reacted had I seen him first.

"I want Roman buried with the Ames de la Terra," I said and inhaled a hitched breath I hadn't expected.

She touched me tenderly on my forearm. "I'll take care of everything. I'll leave as soon as I can."

"Thank you." I bent down and scooped up Roman's body again.

As we walked, I asked, "Did you ever find Hacksaw?"

Her expression darkened. "He got away, probably escaped the city, but I will find him. He will pay for what he did to me."

"When the time comes, I want to be there to help you."

We met each other's gazes, a silent pack. That’s what tragedy did to people who share the same loss—bring them together with an unbreakable bond.

When we approached Ironwood, Victor came out to meet us. He froze in his steps when he saw Roman in my arms. I had minutes before dawn. Hardly enough time to have a conversation about what happened. I wouldn't even be here for Oz and Amy when they woke up. Or Emma. One day, when I was an older vampire, sleep wouldn't be as important. I looked forward to that time.

I gently laid Roman down on a bench and asked Rebecca to grab a sheet to cover him. "Victor, would you help her load him into the van at dawn. She's taking him to the Ames de la Terra for a proper burial."

He stared at Roman’s body. "I told him not to go. I begged him, but he knew."

"Knew what?"

He didn’t look up at me. "He said if he didn't go there to stop you, that we would lose you forever. He sensed a pivotal change in your life, and he said he couldn't let that happen. I told him they would kill him, but he wouldn't stop. You were all that mattered."

I stuffed my fist into my mouth and bit down hard enough to draw blood. I feared that change had already happened. I think I killed Lucy. I couldn’t remember. Maybe I had killed more. Could I come back from that? Roman had given up his life believing I could.

"Did you set me up?" I asked point blank.

He looked at me, his eyes bloodshot. "I swear to you, I didn't. I believed the witch. I don’t know why she betrayed me. She hates Bastian more than anyone I’ve ever met. I must have underestimated the hold he has on her. I promise I would never have sent you to the airport had I known the truth.”

"I want to believe you.” My bones ached with wariness.

“Then believe me. I’ve been honest with you from the start. It’s Bastian who has manipulated you. I’ve seen how the Principes Noctis operates. They can get their worst enemy to believe they are best friends. All of them are that way. They love to put on elaborate shows, making them out to be these noble creatures. It’s disgusting.”

I leaned against a nearby post. I needed to find some strength to do what needs to be done.

"Listen, Aris, I know I'm a jackass. I've done terrible things. I convinced myself it was the only way, but in reality, I was a coward. I let my fears control me, and the city suffered for it. I will always regret what I did, but now that you're here, I want to make it right."

“Do you mean that?” I wasn’t sure I could believe him, not yet, but there was one way he could start proving himself.

“I’ll do anything.”

I leaned away from the post. "Then tonight, after I've slept, you and I are going back to Bastian's."

He snorted. "Why would I do that? He’ll kill me."

"Do you trust me?"

He searched my eyes. "If you say I must go, then I will go. I owe you that much."

I nodded and backed up toward my room, feeling the first of dawn’s light. "Please apologize to Emma for me. I will see her when I rise."

I glanced briefly at Roman's body. This would be the last time I saw him. My throat constricted, making it near impossible to swallow.

"I'm sorry about Roman." he said. "I could tell he loved you like a son."

I averted my gaze and ignored his sentiments. Victor may not have betrayed me, but he was the furthest thing from a saint. The blood on my own hands caught my attention. I was just as bad as him. None of us were innocent. We were all monsters.

I turned away and disappeared into my home. In record time, I showered and changed my clothes, adding them to an already bloodied clothes pile from the day before. So much blood and killing. I retired to my coffin at the last second and closed it tight, partly wishing it would never open again.

Roman, my mentor, and father figure was gone forever.