What was time?

What was real and what was fantasy?

It was impossible to know down here.

It had to have been days since Gray had dragged me down to this pit of despair and abandoned me.

No one had brought me food, and he hadn’t visited me even once, but I knew these cells.

I’d lived in them for years.

I knew how to count the days. The hours passed in breaths I took, in screams of rage I let out for no one to hear, in the soft sobbing that wracked my chest when I thought about the endless days ahead of me.

I was going to die in this pit. There was no other option. It was just a matter of time.

If only he’d killed me instead. That, I could understand. That, I could accept.

But this?

This was the worst thing he could ever have done to me.

Did he know how it made my skin crawl, how it drove me mad?

I’d tasted freedom, felt the warmth of the sun on my skin and run through the trees with careless abandon. I’d stalked the city streets, feeling the adrenaline pumping through my veins as I hunted my next victim.

I’d been alive for the first time in my life, and he’d stolen all of that away from me.

All because I had to be a damned idiot and save his life.

It had been difficult enough before to pretend there was nothing between us, but in that moment, I’d known I couldn’t live in a world he wasn’t a part of. I couldn’t conceive of a reality without him, even if he wasn’t mine.

Even now, with nothing but my madness to surround me, the knowledge that he was alive and well comforted me.

Sometimes, I sent my magic snaking through the castle to find him, to touch him and reassure myself that nothing had happened to him.

His heart beat irregularly at times, but still, it beat on.

He was alive.

Every time I pushed my magic to its limits like that, it left me weak and trembling. I wasn’t supposed to reach that far, but I couldn’t stop myself. I couldn’t go a day without knowing that he was well.

I’d take the pain that came with it once I was done. I’d accept the fall into unconsciousness. I’d deal with the body-shaking dry heaves that accompanied the overexertion.

All so I’d know he was all right.

Damn him for making me feel this way.

“I miss you,” I whispered.

It was just me down here, so what did it hurt to admit that?

I missed the light in his eyes when he smiled at me. Missed the clear signs of struggle on his face when he forced himself to keep his hands off me, letting me know that he desired me just as much as I did him.

Why hadn’t I let him kiss me when the opportunity presented itself?

So many times, I could have taken advantage, but I’d stuck to stupid morals.

What good did they do me now?

I was going to die down here.

No.

I blinked, stunned by the sudden rebellion in my mind.

You’re going to get your ass up and get out of here.

As if I were being compelled by some outside force, I stood and walked to the door that held me captive, then wrapped my fingers around the iron bars that formed the window in the wooden door.

I wasn’t the same person I’d been when I’d lived in these cells before. I wasn’t weak.

I was stronger now.

A cage couldn’t hold me.

I took two steps back on shaky legs—the starvation was starting to get to me—and assessed the door in front of me.

To my great frustration, I still couldn’t see it. I’d thought my eyes would adjust to the darkness, but apparently, we were too far down for that. All the same...

I took a breath in, inhaling the scent of the cage.

The door was old; I could tell that.

Probably rotted.

When was the last time they’d put someone down here? Not for a while, I’d think.

This was a special place, for the worst of the worst.

I took a few more steps back until my back touched the wall, then bent my knees and took a running jump at the door, feet first.

The pain shook through me all the way to my head, but the door gave way, blasting off its hinges.

Now, I needed to get out of the castle undetected.

I smiled.

Piece of cake. I’d been doing that the whole time.

I let my magic rush ahead of me as I carefully climbed the stairs, bent over so that my fingers brushed each step before I put my foot on it. I wasn’t going to trip, wasn’t going to make a single noise that would give me away.

I don’t know how long I climbed, but it was a while before I sensed a guard before me.

With a vicious smile on my lips, I reached for his mind.

Go away.

I pushed the command at him roughly, not wasting time with a delicate touch, preferring instead to heavy-hand it—to squash all the resistance in his mind. I didn’t bother covering up the obvious influence I’d used. He’d figure it out in a little while, but no matter.

They’d find out anyway, once they discovered I’d escaped the cell.

But, damn them, I wasn’t going to wait around to die.

I continued up the stairs, turning away each guard before I reached them, sending them down the line of cells they guarded so they wouldn’t see me, hiding my scent and stilling my heart for a moment as I passed the entrance to the hallways.

They wouldn’t detect me. I wouldn’t let them.

At last, I reached the point in the climb where a small amount of light was let in, where I could see again.

Things were starting to look familiar. I remembered the flight I’d taken with Conall, the night he’d come to set me free.

I kept a hand on the wall now, rather than crouching to touch the steps, until I reached the alcove that led to the tunnel we’d escaped from.

There, I let out a breath of relief. Finally. I was going to make it out of here.

Excitement started to build inside me as I thought about feeling the sun on my skin again.

Yes. I could do this.

I raced down the hallway until I reached another door, pushed through it, and stumbled into the light of day.

Thank the merciful gods.

Daylight. Everyone but the guards would be in their beds now.

I couldn’t have planned this escape better if I’d actually had information to work with.

Suppressing my need to let out the cheer that rose to my lips, I shot off like a rocket across the grounds and through the woods.

Freedom.