Cullen
Shit. I’d overplayed it. I could have chased her back to her car and left her there. Why had I insisted on driving off with her? I could have followed at a distance and she never would have known I was there. I could have kept her safe that way. But, I didn’t. None of the decisions I’d made since the instant I heard her voice and scented her made any damn sense if I were truly trying to not get hunted and mauled by other shifters before this fucking day ended.
Now she’d seen. I’d let her see. I could pretend it was all just an accident, but I knew that wasn’t it. Some deeper part of me wanted her to question, wanted her to know. Only now as I stared down the barrel of her gun, I wondered if I didn’t just deserve to get shot already. I quickly dropped my hands from her elbows and took a step back.
“I told you it wasn’t that bad,” I said, putting my hands up, palms out. “He grazed me, that’s all. I guess I just bleed a lot.”
“Bleed a lot? Look at me. Look at you.”
“You’ve been through a lot tonight. You’re upset. I’ll go in and get checked out if you want, but I’d really rather just make sure you get home safe. I wasn’t kidding about what I said. Those thugs could come back. Hell, they might be following us. I know how to lose them if they are. I’ll take you home.”
Anya shook her head. One coppery curl fell over her eyes. The urge to reach out and twirl that curl between my fingers was strong. Hell, the urge just to touch her had clouded my judgment since the second I laid eyes on her. She had no idea the kind of danger she was in. Those bears would come back. If I picked up on what was different about her, they sure as hell had. I didn’t want to think about it, but I knew in my soul it was the reason they went after her in the first place. Thank God they hadn’t wanted to risk drawing human attention to get to her. That might not always be true. But, short of flinging her over my shoulder and dragging her off to a bear den, I wasn’t sure how to protect her without scaring her half to death.
“Do you trust me?” I said, hedging my bets that the very thing that put her in danger would also help her understand she needed me. Hell, I was afraid to even admit it even in my own mind. But every instinct in my body told me the truth of what she was. Anam Cara. A bear’s mate. The instant I said the words in my mind, my own bear flared to life inside of me.
Mine!
I shook him off. It was too dangerous to hope for. Even if it were true, I could offer her nothing. I had no lands anymore. No claim or name to protect her with. My clan had banished me for sins my father had committed.
“Yes.” She gasped her answer and I slowly dropped my hands to the side. Her own body had to be at war with her mind. She felt something around me but probably didn’t understand it.
“You live nearby?” I framed it as a question, but I already knew the answer. I’d touched her. I’d sat inches from her. Her scent was with me, simmering my blood. I could track her for miles if I wanted. Her house wasn’t far, less than a mile from here to the east. I closed my eyes and I could see it. She lived at the end of a residential road abutting the busiest street in Danforth.
“Yes,” she answered. She kept her gun pointed straight at me. Just like the bears in the alley, it wouldn’t really help her against me either. Another bear could hurt me far more than a bullet could. She’d have to hit me straight through the heart or the brain, and that’s only if I didn’t have the speed to dodge it, which I did. With the way her fingers shook, she was in greater danger of accidently shooting her own foot. I took a tentative step forward and carefully closed my hand around hers. I lowered the gun and handed it back to her, barrel first.
“Come on,” I said. “My tetanus shot can wait. You’re more shaken up than you realize. You sure you don’t want to go in there and get yourself checked out? He … they didn’t touch you, did they?”
I knew they hadn’t, but right now I needed desperately to shift her focus off me. Her brain frantically tried to explain away what her eyes and heart told her. I shouldn’t be healed. Her thoughts searched for logic, and I’d just provided the easiest path. She was traumatized. She’d imagined the severity of my injuries. Nothing else would make sense.
She’d been so strong. So brave. She’d stood up to three homicidal werebears without even so much as flinching. But now, my words and reality sank in. Her hands shook and she dropped the gun. I shot my hand out and caught it just before it hit the pavement. I didn’t give her a chance to protest but hooked an arm through hers and took her to the passenger side of the car. Her jaw still slack and her eyes wide, she got in and let me buckle her seatbelt.
I came around to the other side, slid behind the wheel, and started the car. I went east on Webber Road and asked her for directions almost as an afterthought. My wounds she seemed ready to explain away. Best not to give her anything else incredible to process in one night.
I pulled into the driveway of an L-shaped brick duplex with white shutters. She didn’t have to tell me her door was the one at the end of the long sidewalk. She also didn’t have to tell me the second unit was vacant. I could sense all of that as I opened her car door for her and walked her to the door.
“Thank you,” she said, turning to face me as she pulled her key out of the small black purse she had slung across her chest. Color had come back into her cheeks. The tiny pulse in her temple beat slowly.
“I’m just glad you’re okay,” I said. “Do me a favor and lock your doors tight tonight. Don’t go anywhere else.”
She looked around and smoothed her curls away from her face. I drank in every detail of her. Her skin was smooth and pale beneath the motion sensor light. She had a smattering of ruddy freckles across her nose. Her trench coat opened at the collar and my eyes traveled down to the hollow of her throat. I imagined kissing her there and working my way down. Though she had her coat tightly sashed, I could see her small waist and ample rear end, just the way I liked it. I wanted to slip my hands through the gap where she’d missed a button and feel the solid weight of her breasts.
Mine.
The bear hovered just below the surface, and I found myself grateful for the murky shadows just outside the circle of her porch light. She would have seen my bear eyes widen. Standing this close to her, she would have detected they weren’t quite human.
“I won’t,” she said, smiling. She paused for a fraction of a second as she slid the key into the lock and turned back to me. I think she might have been thinking whether to invite me in. I would have said yes, wanting nothing more than to be close to her. But while her night might be over, mine was just beginning.
“Don’t go back to Blackfoot,” I said, trying to make my voice sound less ominous and failing.
Anya cocked her head to the side and furrowed her delicate brow. “I’m going back to Blackfoot. I work there now. That’s what I was doing there. I filled out an application a few hours ago and I got a job at the Bluelight Lounge. I start tomorrow night.”
She took a step back after she said it and her eyes widened. I think she regretted revealing that personal detail. My pulse thundered in my ears. I clenched my fists to my sides, feeling blood welling in my palms where I couldn’t retract my bear claws fast enough.
“No!” My voice dropped an octave and goosebumps raised across her throat. Her skin flushed. I felt hairs bristle at the back of my neck. My bear commanded her and her body responded on a preternatural level her mind couldn’t process. If I needed any further confirmation of what she was, that was it. Anam Cara. I don’t know how I found the strength not to kiss her.
“It’s just … what do you know about that place? It could be a rough crowd.”
Anya shot me a smirk that made me want to draw her into my arms and nip her bottom lip. Standing out here with her was dangerous. The longer I did, the harder it became to control my baser instincts. The harder it was for her too, though she couldn’t possibly understand why.
“I’m a big girl,” she answered. “And you’re off the hook, Cullen. Saving my life doesn’t mean you own it.”
The hell it doesn’t. You’re mine. I gritted my teeth to keep the bear quiet.
“Plus,” she said, stepping forward. “Working there is the entire reason I came out here all the way from Chicago. I’m looking for someone and I’m not leaving until I find her.” She planted her palm on my chest. Her eyes flashed with dark knowledge as her fingers grazed the flesh where the polar bear had gored me. If she lifted my shirt she’d see the raised marks that startled her in the hospital parking lot were all but gone now. I reached up and clasped her hand, pulling it gently but firmly away from me. Instinct took over and I leaned down and kissed her palm. Anya let out a little gasp and her lips formed a surprised “O”. She slid her hand out of mine and pressed her back against the doorframe.
“Just be careful,” I said. “I might not always be there to come to your rescue.” My words felt hollow and a simmering rage bubbled inside of me. I wanted nothing more than to promise her I’d never leave her side. But, I had no right. I had nothing to offer her, and binding myself to her would only put both of us in even greater danger.
“I might not always need you to.” She tapped her purse where she kept Martha. I resisted the urge to tell her that wouldn’t have done her any good tonight. She’d taken in a lot on faith already.
“Good night,” I said, wanting to stay, but eager to finish my business.
“Good night, Cullen,” she said. My name on her lips felt erotic. I wanted to hear her cry it out in the throes of pleasure I knew only I could give her. The bear rumbled in my chest and I felt my claws spring out again. I turned quickly and stepped out from under the glow of the porch light. I gave her a wave and started to walk down the sidewalk.
As I reached the street, she called out to me. “Wait, you drove my car. How are you going to get home?”
I let the noise from passing traffic drown out my need to answer then disappeared into the shadows. If she’d run to the end of her sidewalk just then, she wouldn’t have been able to find me. In the time it would have taken her, I was already three blocks away and running fast.
My heart exploded with rage inside my chest. The Bluelight Lounge. She’d been there already, so it would be too easy to find. I knew every place she’d been in town now. It was nearly midnight before I found the place. I prayed it wouldn’t be what I suspected. But, by the time I saw the blinking blue neon sign on the corner of Main and Broad Street back in downtown Blackfoot, I knew my suspicions were more than right; the reality was worse.
I kept to the shadows. Even being here was risky. I just hoped the bears who’d cornered Anya were so preoccupied with her scent, they hadn’t bothered to fix mine. I knew that was probably a long shot as the polar bear drew blood. Still, it was a chance I needed to take.
Three drunk patrons, two men and a woman, staggered out of the bar laughing. They were human. Well-dressed. Harmless. One of the men looped his arm around the woman. A cab pulled up and they got in together. I crossed the street and peered through the bay window at the front of the bar. It was upscale for the neighborhood. The bar itself formed a large square at the center. A few late night customers sat at round, copper-topped tables. Two waitresses served drinks wearing off the shoulder short black dresses with wide, ruffled skirts. I could immediately see the draw. The girls were gorgeous, their cleavage on display as they leaned own and set cocktail napkins down.
I pulled away from the window and thunked the back of my head against the brick wall. Tomorrow night, Anya planned on wearing that? She’d be there getting ogled just like those girls were. Jealous, protective rage flared within me at the same time my dick stiffened thinking how much I’d like to be the one ogling.
My ears pricked as a deep voice boomed from somewhere down a hallway inside the building. I let out a hard breath and turned back toward the window. He came out a door on the other side of the bar. He wore a white dress shirt, the sleeves rolled up revealing thick, hairy arms. His red tie was slightly askew and he raised a hand to straighten it. Then, he ran a hand through his thick, white hair and barked an order to one of the bartenders.
Another polar bear.
He wasn’t the same one from the alley. This guy was bigger, but the scent off him, even from here, couldn’t be a mistake. He too had a clipped Russian accent as he asked the bartender about the nightly receipts. It wasn’t a coincidence. It couldn’t be. I clenched my teeth and let the growl rip through me.
No wonder they couldn’t scent me. This place was crawling with werebears. And I’d bet my left leg the three that followed her came straight from this bar after she’d been here filling out her job application. They knew what she was the instant she walked through the door just like I did. Which meant Anya would never be safe. She was walking straight back into the bears’ lair.