Julian may have rolled his eyes, but I got the rest of the scotch.

Half an hour later, sitting in the Jacuzzi tub, I couldn’t be bothered to give a shit about much of anything as I drained the last bit of the bottle and set it aside. The jets worked away at the tension in my shoulders, and for the first time in the last sixteen hours I felt like some semblance of my usual self. A pounding head from interesting life choices and drinking a crap ton of booze beat out lighting shit on fire and throwing myself at the Horsemen any day.

There was a knock at the door before it swung open.

“You know, you can’t keep hiding out in here forever.”

Moira’s voice drifted over me as she walked into the bathroom, barefoot but dressed like she just got back from clubbing. She wore a little black dress and onyx stud earrings that reflected in the dim light. Her dark green hair was pulled back into a massive ballerina bun, not a single hair out of place. It made her blue eyes pop and the pentagrams swirled. The devil’s mark—my mark—forever branded on her.

“I’m not hiding,” I lied. “I just don’t feel well.”

Moira gave me a no-nonsense kind of look and I groaned leaning back to rest my head on Bandit since he chose to sprawl out on the edge of the bathtub behind me. He purred, curling his tail around my neck. I absentmindedly reached back to scratch him behind the ear.

“Of course you don’t feel well. You’re entering the transition. I’d be shocked if you did.” She came to sit behind me, her footsteps almost silent against the stone floor. “Every time you’re around one of them, you either want to fuck ‘em or kill ‘em, and funny as it is…that’s not you. It’s the hormones, or whatever you want to call it.” I felt her hands in my hair as she undid the messy knot I’d pulled it in and began working through the tangles.

“I’m frustrated they feel they can tell me what to do and decide what’s best for me, and given the complicated relationships at the moment, I don’t think that’s unreasonable,” I grumbled. Moira gently massaged my scalp, her steady warmth and contentment bleeding into me.

“They are…trying. This isn’t exactly the most conventional situation. You’re a hell of a lot more powerful than they expected, and your moods are all over the place. Sorry, but it’s true,” she added when I opened my mouth to object. “Plus, the beast has already made it clear she intends to claim them. Not to mention the whole familiar thing, which we haven’t even gotten a chance to talk about.” I opened my mouth to apologize and she tugged a little on my hair. “Don’t even think about apologizing. There’s enough crap going on. It can wait until we have a chance to breathe. Seriously. I’ve been your familiar for years if the Horsemen are right. You branding me just makes it official.”

I don’t know how I ended up so lucky to have a best friend like her. For as crazy as she may be, she was the rock I needed when the world went to shit. A tear pricked my left eye, and I wiped it away before it had the chance to fall.

“Are you upset that I branded you?” I asked quietly, increasingly aware of the sound of water dripping from the faucet and three heartbeats filling the huge space.

“Hell no. Why on earth would you think that?” She didn’t even have to think about her answer.

“Because I know how you feel about branding in general and I don’t want you to think this means I own you or some shit. I’m not that kind of demon.” I swallowed hard. “I didn’t mean to…I just wanted to save you.” Moira released my hair and came around to sit on the side of the tub.

“You don’t need to apologize for this, Ruby,” she said and motioned to her eyes. “I know what kind of demon you are, and I know you didn’t brand me out of some fucked up possessive complex. You saved my life, and the way I see it is Hell is going to be a lot safer with your mark on me. No one fucks with a demon carrying the devil’s pentagram. People will think twice before trying something.” I reached over and took her hand, squeezing it gently. She wrapped both of hers around mine and squeezed back. “The Horsemen are also fucking livid because they were supposed to be your familiars. I like that being one means they can’t just take you from me. They and everyone else knows where the score is now.”

I chuckled under my breath. Of course she would see it that way.

“We’re a package deal,” I agreed.

“Yup. You, me, and the trash panda,” Moira snickered. Bandit grumbled and tucked his tail tighter around me.

“Raccoon,” I corrected her.

“He literally ate trash before you took him in. You can’t even argue he’s like a less domesticated cat. He ate trash—”

Another knock at the door and it cracked open.

“Everything okay in here, love?” Rysten called.

“We’ll be out in a minute,” I said. Moira rolled her eyes as the door slammed shut. “How was Bourbon Street with him?”

She groaned. “It’s hard to have fun when you’re being babysat by someone who doesn’t want to be there. I swear, he spent the whole time pouting because you were back here, and he didn’t want to be on ‘Moira duty’. What the fuck is that anyways?”

“Well, I’m sorry you couldn’t get laid,” I chuckled, not feeling all that sorry. I’m sure she’d have a plethora of demons lining up at her door in Hell, where I hoped she would be safer.

“Speaking of getting laid”—she paused and raised an eyebrow—“what’s the deal? I could tell you were having some issues earlier. Is it the whole branding thing? What’s going on there?”

Oh man.

I wasn’t sure I wanted to have this conversation, but I was running out of time where choice would even be an option. Pulling my head up from Bandit, I slowly scooted forward so I could get out of the tub. The warm air fanned my wet skin, making my head feel fuzzy.

“It’s complicated. I do want them. All of them, but we’ve got some issues to sort out. I don’t want them making choices for me.”

That was putting it mildly. We had several big problems to sort through, but I wasn’t sure how much I felt like going through it all in my very limited time with Moira. I released her hand to step out of the tub and my toes curled into the shaggy white rug beneath me.

“Me being pissed with Allistair when I woke up could have been avoided if they’d told me, ‘hey, you need to feed’ versus knocking me out and putting me in a room with him. That really wasn’t cool, and while I do feel better, that doesn’t excuse that it was a shitty thing to do.” I reached over for a fluffy white towel and dried myself off.

“I don’t know if you can tell, but to the rest of us you haven’t been thinking that clearly. You gotta remember that, and this is coming from me. You know I’d shove my foot up any of their asses if I thought they were doing something they shouldn’t be, but as it is, you started a fire in the living room. A fire no one but you can control.” She paused to press her lips together in a troubled smile. “I didn’t think what Allistair did was all that smart. I told them it would probably piss you off more, but I also get why they did it… the bigger thing here is I’m trying to make sure this is what you want, because you already claimed that fuckface, War, and pretty boy, Famine. Pest is champing at the bit to be next. So if you don’t want this…”

She left her prompt in the air, but we both knew what she meant. If I don’t want this, it’s a little fucking late. Brands can’t be undone.

Wish someone would have gone and told the beast that before she pulled this.

I shook my head turning to the opaque white counter where a pair of yoga pants and my favorite tank top undershirt sat waiting for me. In Oregon, it had been too cold to wear anything sleeveless this time of year, but down in New Orleans and its sticky Louisiana heat, the humidity stayed year-round.

I dressed slowly, taking my sweet time while I tried to sort through my thoughts. Already the fuzziness was starting up again. I didn’t give myself an hour before I was delirious.

“My life was already changing faster than I was comfortable with. Now I’m starting the transition to becoming immortal with two mates, but the beast wants more.” I pressed my hands together, twisting my fingers around. “It’s not the sex that gets me here. It’s my lack of control in branding them. I didn’t mean to brand Laran. I sure as fuck wasn’t planning on branding Allistair. The beast did that shit, and now they’re both my mates even though we haven’t consummated it. She wants all of them and I have no way of stopping myself from tying them to me in every way.” I paused, finally feeling like I was getting to the crux of the matter. “But what if they don’t want that? I mean—I know Rysten does, but Julian? He’s made it pretty clear he doesn’t want to go further, even though he’s greener than you. He should get the right to choose that, just like Allistair and Laran should have… but I’m afraid if they don’t want me, the beast isn’t going to let any of them choose someone else either…”

I let out a heavy sigh, my shoulders folding in. I cared about the guys. All of them. I really did, but would I feel that way in hundred years? What about a thousand? I already had Laran and Allistair to worry about. Having this talk with them wasn’t going to be nearly as easy as it was with Moira. Having it with all four of them? The idea of it made my head spin.

I leaned my hip against the counter and rubbed my temples. I guess this is what it means to have demon problems and commitment issues, but what could you expect out of someone who couldn’t give a guy a blowjob without them going nuts?

“Okay, first, Julian is fighting a losing battle. We all know this. Hell, even the trash panda knows it—” She broke off to frown as Bandit let a chittering kind of…laugh. Almost like he was chuckling. “Point is, he’ll get over it. Second, have you met the four of them? Are we talking about the same Horsemen?” Moira asked, crossing her arms over her chest. I scrunched my eyebrows together, confused as to where she was going. “Because those four have been fucking crazy about you ever since they showed up.”

“That doesn’t mean they wanted to spend forever with me, Moira.” Bandit walked over and tugged on my pants, signaling for me to pick him up. “Or that I wanted to spend forever with them,” I added as I gathered him in my arms.

“You’re spending forever with them whether you fuck them or not,” she pointed out, tapping her foot almost impatiently.

“Yeah, and I’d rather the beast not try to rip anyone’s balls off because they decided they didn’t want to be with me anymore, or with me to begin with,” I snapped, impatient as hell back. Her own moodiness at my hesitation was bleeding over into me.

“But if you can’t stop it, then it’s going to happen either way.” She lifted both eyebrows and pursed her lips, making her point. “And have you stopped to even ask them how they feel instead of just assuming? I mean, for devil’s sake, Ruby, their entire existence is wrapped around you. In their eyes you could have hung the fucking moon, babe.”

“Didn’t we already have this talk about diving into things without about thinking it?” I asked in almost whine. Bandit held onto me tighter and used one paw to stroke my cheek. Moira rolled her eyes.

“Yes. We did, and we came to the conclusion that you’re the fucking Queen of Hell whether you like it or not. This is no different, Ruby.” She marched right up to me and grabbed me by my chin, pulling me down to her level. “You’ve got four insanely hot guys that that beast of yours chose and sitting here in denial isn’t going to change that,” she said in a calming voice. “Now you can she-demon up just like you’ve done with everything else in your life, or you can sit in here being pouty and drinking scotch. What’s it going to be?”

My lips pressed together as I glanced over at the empty bottle.

I knew this. I knew before we even talked what I needed to do. I just didn’t want to admit it.

But that’s the thing: I either keep up with the program, or one of these times the problem will get ahead of me. I wasn’t going to let that happen.

I was Ruby Morningstar, for devil’s sake.

I’d found out I was Lucifer’s daughter and survived multiple assassination attempts. I’d lived through abuse and came out stronger. I’d learned I had more gifts than I ever thought possible, and now—I was going to transition like a motherfucking boss.

Hopefully. Because it’s not like this job came with a training manual.

And I was running out of options.