I brushed my hand through the green leaves as I watched Danny wash her hair in the sapphire river passing through the forest. The glint of the sun illuminated her face and a while back, the playful rivets in the water would’ve elicited a smile from her face. But not now, not today. Not after what happened.

The frown between her eyebrows added almost ten years to her real age and I would’ve tried to make her smile if I knew how to myself.

“Danny?”

Her back tensed and she stopped splashing water in her face. “Yes?”

“It’s t-time to go, Darren and Regan are w-waiting,” I said, my voice trembling slightly. My stutter was always a lot better when it was just her. But even all the comfort and love couldn’t completely erase the tremour I picked up years ago.

She sighed, her shoulders falling. “I’m almost ready.”

“O-Okay.”

I watched as she wrung the water out of her hair and flicked it over her shoulder. The sun reflected in every single droplet and under different circumstances, she would’ve been radiating. Now she was just hauntingly beautiful.

She tucked her shoulders back into her shirt and pulled her robe closed. With a longing look, she weaved her hand through the sapphire water and sighed. She turned and a weak smile graced her face as she saw me. The usual spark in her eyes reduced to a dull glimmer that made me ache. She was unhappy and there was nothing I could do to help.

“I-I miss them,” I admitted, hoping that my empathy would make her feel better.

“So do I, JP… So do I.” Briefly, she rested her head onto my shoulder and I felt her melt into me. As if she were made of glass, I wrapped my arm around her as tenderly as I could. She was mine to take care of, even if I wasn’t good at it, I still wanted to. I needed to. It pained me to see her so restless and solemn. The lethargy was seeping into her bones and I feared it would never leave.

“We don’t need t-to move today, if you’re not up f-for it. W-We can stay another night h-here.”

Danny nodded and curled into my embrace. There was something so incredibly soothing about having her in my arms, even though nothing about it even remotely solved our problems.

“I’m glad I have you with me,” she murmured, her warm breath fanning against my skin. Even with all the anxiety and worry swirling in my chest, having her with me brought some of my previous vigor back. From before the bad times all cascaded down onto us.

“E-Everywhere you g-go, you will h-have me.” I pressed a soft kiss on the top of her head and breathed in her scent. Even in the grey and dark winter, she smelled like summer. If only I could bring back the smile on her face, the same smile she had when we fell in love. I just wanted to bring that back, but how? What could I do that would make her forget about all the sadness in this world and lighten the burdens she was carrying on her shoulders? Maybe I could try and pick her flowers? Or take her on a date?

Oh, that was not a bad idea. We passed a village not too far back, maybe I could venture back and grab some supplies. Candles and fresh bread, or maybe some marinated meat and aged wine. She’d like that.

“You look deep in thought?”

“J-Just wondering i-if you wanted to s-spent tonight w-with me.”

“Just with you?”

“Y-Yes, just w-with me,” I confirmed, hoping Regan and Darren wouldn’t mind. But I couldn’t imagine why they would. Not if they knew it might cheer her up.

“I’d love to, JP.” A half-smile lingered around her lips, but it never really reached her eyes. Heartbreaking. Witnessing my woman so sad and defeated was heartbreaking. And there really was nobody to blame for this. Not even Chesca was left to blame.

With our fingers intertwined, we climbed the steep hill back up to our campsite. The fire crackled softly in the middle of the stone ring and was surely warming up our tent. Just our lonely tent.

It really was weird being without the twins and Akira. Aspen and Ashleigh had been with us for years now. We travelled across the country, fought enemies in group, grew hungry together. They were like family and goodbye had not been easy. Even Akira had become family in no time. Not that we had a choice in that as Ashleigh’s mate.

A slight twinge of melancholy took over my heart as Regan greeted our woman. He kissed her softly and I saw something flit through her eyes. Something I could only describe as a little spark of hope.

There surely was something magical about the wolf-mates. And I didn’t really fit into that picture. I had a place in her heart and I knew I did, but I would never have a connection like theirs. Not something so predestined, something so strong.

It almost brought sorrow onto me. Almost. I couldn’t feel bleak about her being so loved, that would just be small of me. And nothing about Danny made me feel small. No, she made me stand up a little straighter, feel a little taller, gave me a bit more courage. She made me grateful that after all the troubles we ran into and all the troubles that chased us, she stood by my side. That she was still here.

I beckoned Darren, hoping to speak to him privately. I whispered my plan in his ear, asking if it was okay if I planned something for Danny tonight. He nodded and patted my back, a smirk cracking his face.

“She’ll love it,” he grimaced, nodding at the fire. “Regan and I will tend to the fire.”

“T-Thanks, mate.”

He nodded, slightly bowing his head. It looked so gracefully out of place, it was almost comical. Even though he denied his heritage, there was something elegant about Darren that made him stand out in the wild. Almost as if the forest had no grip on him and the dirt just rolled off of him. He strolled through the camp and bent to inspect one of the rare flowers growing in one of the ditches. A stray glint of sun illuminated him and it was almost if the branches bowed for him.

Yes, even if he didn’t see himself as a prince, the world sure did. And the warmth Danny held for him couldn’t be mistaken with anything else than love. It was easily one of the purest things I’d ever seen. Well, all of the mating bonds were just that. Pure. Natural. Destined.

And Darren and Regan graced me by letting me stand by in their midst with Danny. Something I couldn’t help but be eternally grateful for. I’d seen first hand how strong their wolves made their bonds. Aspen showed me in a way I would never forget. Something else I wished I thanked him for.

I shook the solemn thoughts out of my head and focused on the task at hand. To make Danny smile as if there were no worries in the world. I didn’t think I could make that happen, so I’d settle for just a smile.

With a glance, I left Danny wrapped around Regan and grabbed one of the horses. If I made haste, I could reach the village before it was dark. The chestnut horse neighed softly as I rode through the last of the shrubbery and into the small settlement down the stream. The typical scent of smoke and food greeted me before I reached the inns. A soft rumble could be heard from all of the inns. At least they were actually full and it wasn’t just a lie they made up to get us out.

It’d be nicer if I could’ve organised a nice warm bed for my woman though. But she didn’t seem to particularly mind sleeping in tents in the forest. But still… She deserved a nice, warm home. Like Regan’s castle. Or Darren’s Keep. All nice and suitable places for her.

But what did I have to offer her? A tent in the mud and if I was lucky, a piece of aged ham.

I counted the coins in my purse and sighed. Maybe not. What was she even doing with me? The war was over and Aspen found his destiny. There was no reason for us to be camping in the wild and trekking through no-mans-land.

Disheartened, I skipped the stall with meat and moved to the next one. If I interpreted the map correctly, we were near the barley fields of Jurac. And that meant… Cheap beer and tasty bread. And Danny happened to love both of them.

“C-Could I have a j-jug of ale a-and a small l-loaf of bread?” I asked, shaking out the copper coins into my hand. I just hoped it was enough. After the three month trip with Akira, not a lot of our riches were left. And until we routed back to our home, we’d have to make do with the money we brought. At the moment, that wasn’t a whole lot. Was it really fair to spend some of it for just Danny and I?

“H-How much is t-the b-big one?” I asked, changing my mind about being alone with Danny. Darren and Regan deserved some down time too and food really was better when shared between friends.

“A silver piece,” the man grumbled, eyeing me suspiciously. With my ripped clothes and dirty face, he probably doubted I could afford it. I counted the copper coins in my hand and parted with more than half of them.

“I-I’ll take the a-ale and t-the big loaf.”

“Right.” He shoved the bread in a simple wrap and pushed the jug to my side. Happy with my choices, I tucked the wonderfully smelling pastry in my knapsack and decided to carry the jug until I found something else I liked. Regan did have a soft spot for goat cheese, maybe I could find him a piece. Or some some sweet nuts for Darren, although I doubted I could afford them.

I pottered through the little village until the sun touched the horizon. With a couple of dates and a tiny sliver of cheese, I rode the horse back to the campsite. It certainly wasn’t a feast, but I hoped it would put a smile on their faces anyway.

Before the night completely fell, I found the red hue the fire cast on the desolated forest. The soft murmurs of hushed voices made me pause for a moment as I studied my friends and Danny from afar. With Darren on one side and Regan on the other, she looked so… Complete. Even though she was resting her head on Regan’s shoulder, she was holding Darren’s hand. The sorrow was still visible in her eyes, but there was something else too. Something that made me confident she would be okay, as long as she had those two.

A branch snapped as I broke the spell she had over them and smiled to show it was me. I pushed the discomfort back and ignored how uneasy I felt. I wasn’t intruding, Danny was also my woman and Darren and Regan were two of my dearest friends.

And yet, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I didn’t belong.