After my synthetic feeding, Draven led me to the second floor where Sirus was waiting for me. He hugged me at the door, and I watched him leave, swallowing down the clump in my throat as I took a seat in front of the large mahogany desk. Sirus was sitting at his desk as his fingers pressed over glowing keys. He hardly made a sound in the great office. Behind him was a grand display of books and antiques illuminated by glowing red lights. The keys stopped clicking, and he turned his attention from his screen up toward me. My eyes focused on the pale blond with sparkling green eyes and I let out a slow breath as I waited for him to speak.

“My dearest Riley,” he said with a sinister grin. “You're looking pale. How are you feeling?”

“I'm feeling fine,” I replied. “I've just eaten.”

“You mean you've just sustained,” he corrected. “You can hardly call that food.”

I rolled my eyes and stared at the antique picture frame on the desk, studying the figures standing inside the silver frame.

“That goo Draven creates is nothing like the real thing,” Sirus went on. “It's like taking methadone when you could have heroin.”

“It keeps me going,” I said. “And it proves that you can live without killing.”

Sirus offered a polite grin and smiled, a white fang poking from underneath his pink lip like a cat eager to hunt.

“That's no way to live,” he said. “That’s no life.”

“Killing to live isn't quite logical either,” I retorted. I knew I was pressing on his nerves, but I refused to give in to their way of life. Not when there was an alternative.

“Oh, my dearest Riley,” he said while standing from his chair. “We live in a time of the individual. This is when the lesser man strives to be the greater man by merely existing as an individual entity. In order to progress, we must do better than the lesser man. We must kill the lesser man.”

“I don't understand,” I said.

“Man has created vaccines, encouraged equality, and essentially eliminated natural selection. They've destroyed population control. We are the ones who must take that responsibility and help humans remember their place in the food chain,” he explained.

I cringed.

“You sound like a madman,” I commented.

“I am merely stating the truth, my darling Riley. There is no reason I shouldn't,” he said pointedly. “If you wore the same glasses, you would be able to live your life more freely as a member of this coven.”

“I didn't choose this coven,” I said.

“No, it chose you,” he growled. “And I chose you.”

“It wasn't your choice to make, Sirus. I didn't want to become this wretched thing,” I said while standing from the chair.

I walked to the window that looked out into the courtyard, looking down upon the small groups of vampires roaming around the concrete area. The center held a fountain decorated with gargoyles. Liquid poured from their mouths and splashed into the main area as a few well-dressed coven members sat around the edge. Long shadows danced across the courtyard from the many torches lit around the perimeter, making the whole scene look like it came straight from an M. Night Shyamalan film.

Draven made an appearance down below. I watched him bounce easily between each group with a polite grin, bowing and tipping his hat to each vampire he greeted. He was so smooth with them. I wish I could do the same. Part of me did, at least. The other part just wanted to run.

“I could have left you there out in the field where you were bleeding, but I purposefully instructed Cronin to bring you in,” he said. “Would you have preferred to die alone in an empty field where no one would have found you?”

I remained silent.

“Nothing is keeping you from becoming a true family member except for the denial of your function,” Sirus continued.

“I just don't understand why you won't stop killing if you have an alternative,” I said to the windowpane.

“It's simply not possible, Riley,” he replied. “There is no such thing as a vegan vampire. There's never been such a thing. If we weren't supposed to kill humans, we wouldn't have been made to do so.”

The window fogged as I sighed, and I tucked my hands away into my skirt pockets and fingered the dagger I carried, looking down at the long strands of silk falling from my black belt. It was my uniform. Many of the new vamplings wore formal clothing with a red patch tied to the belt so as to easily be identified. Not that it wasn't terribly obvious who I was. Everyone in the coven knew me by name. They jeered in my direction for my verbal outcry against killing humans. I've become somewhat infamous here.

Soft, massive hands rested upon my petite shoulders. I shook them away.

“It offends me that you defy me in such a horrid manner,” Sirus whispered as his grip returned over my shoulder. “Why do you pull away from me after all I've done for you?”

“I'm just uncomfortable, Sirus,” I replied.

“You will address me formally, or you will remain silent. You know the rules,” he said sternly.

My lower lip quivered. I looked down at the ground with mournful eyes, wishing Draven was at my side to defend me as he typically did. But he was out in the courtyard. I was alone here.

“Address me formally,” Sirus repeated in a low voice.

“I am uncomfortable, Master,” I whispered.

He turned me around slowly, hugging my shoulders with his giant hands.

“And why would you be uncomfortable in my presence, little vampling?” he asked.

“I am not accustomed to this place,” I replied. “It frightens me. This place, these people. I’m not cut out for this.” Perhaps honesty would help him understand.

Sirus shook his head, his long blond hair flowing like silk over his shoulders. A cold thumb ran over my soft cheek and landed on my still-quivering lip.

“You are cut out for it, you just need to see it for yourself.”

I tilted my head and met his gaze. “Why me? Why waste your efforts on me?”

Sirus let out a slow breath and looked me up and down with a quizzical eye. “The timing was right. We needed a twelfth in our coven before the Centennial de Sang. It’s as simple as that.” His sharp voice snapped me out of my daze. That was the first I’d heard anyone admit it was just a matter of timing. I knew I wasn’t anything special. I was just filling a hole so they wouldn’t sink.

“Well, there you have it, I guess. That’s what happens when you have to pick from the bottom of the barrel of what’s available. You’re stuck with someone who refuses to feed on humans and who is too weak to feel comfortable among your kind.” My voice was angry and bitter, more so than I intended.

“Our kind, Riley. And don’t say such things. You’re one of us now, and you will act as such. There is no need to fear this place. We want nothing but the best for you. I've already made the arrangements for your twenty-first birthday,” he said. “It's going to be extravagant.”

His green eyes were glowing with excitement as his thumb rested on my chin, a sharp nail curling over my cheekbone.

“I've called the caterer for some delicious human foods that I'm sure you've missed, and we've arranged for the orchestra to visit. We'll have dancing, red wine, and we'll let you choose which human you get to sacrifice for the lot of us to see,” he explained. His voice then darkened slightly. “And, of course, the council will be there to observe.”

I shook my head. “I can't,” I whispered. My throat tightened as I spoke and I barely managed to get the word out.

I pulled away from him again and crossed the room, leaning against his desk.

“You must,” he said firmly. “You must, or you face death. There is nothing worse than a vampling's death, my dear, and you won't be the first or last, but it would pain me to put you through such a thing. Do you really want that?”

His voice had risen to a booming pitch that shook me to my core. The tears fell freely now and landed on the mahogany desk, little dark circles decorating the luscious wood. I relished in those tears, letting them fall freely, knowing full well that if I were to turn into a full vampire that they would be among the many things I would no longer have. They were my tie to my own humanity, and I had no reason to hold them back from him.

“I've given you everything!” he roared. “And you still defy me!”

“You've given me darkness,” I growled as I slammed my hand against the desk. “And I'm paying for your crimes!”

I fled from the room and sprinted down the hall, nearly colliding with a servant as I turned a corner. I muttered a quick apology and continued to run until I reached the front doors. I hadn't intended to come out towards the courtyard, but perhaps I needed the air. It might have done me well to be out in the open.

Or would I just be scorned by the others?

I shook my head and pushed against the doors, greeting the cool night air that met my burning eyes.