Chapter Twenty-Nine
Amanda strolled through the garden of Liningston Abbey. Gabriel had brought her back here after she’d parted from her mother in Colton.
She’d grown nostalgic during those last hours with Mama. They would probably never see each other again. There would be no more periodic letters for Mrs. Bootlescamp waiting for her at the print shop. She would not be in London to receive them even if one did come, from wherever Mama landed.
Mama had been relieved beyond words to be offered exile. Learning two dukes would escort her to the ship did much to make the prospect more appealing. Amanda pictured her, dining with Brentworth and Stratton, amusing them with stories of thieving derring-do. She made Mama promise not to try and seduce either one of them, but she may have heard a lie in reply. She trusted Mama had sized up both men the way a thief would, however, and knew Stratton would never succumb, and Brentworth would never set her free afterward.
It had been a lonely journey back to this house yesterday. Gabriel had not been with her in the carriage. He often rode ahead, galloping hard. He brooded over something. Their parting, perhaps. She could not escape the worry that what he had heard in that chamber had made him question his faith in her, however. Yarnell’s explanation of everything had been terribly plausible.
At least the stolen items were headed back to London. She would have something of herself back once they were returned. With time, in a new world, maybe Amanda the thief would disappear again.
They would leave for Liverpool in the morning. Gabriel had given her the choice to go with Mama to Naples. She had not wanted that, not at all. She would instead go to America, as she so often dreamed. She would leave her entire history behind this time.
She returned to the house and the chamber she had used whenever in this house. She asked for dinner to be sent up to her. Gabriel had avoided her all day, even after they’d arrived. That was probably wise. She did not think she could spend hours on end crying inside but pretending to be normal.
The dinner arrived as the sun set. She watched the last light out the window while servants set it out, and after the door closed behind them. She did not care what had been brought, although she had eaten little all day.
Finally she decided that she should probably consider the future waiting, and her need for health and strength. She turned to avail herself of whatever meal had come.
Only then did she realize more than a meal had arrived. Gabriel stood there watching her. She noticed two plates on the table.
He gave her one of his adorable smiles. He held up a bottle of champagne. “I thought I would join you.”
She looked at that bottle. Memories of how they had shared similar ones rushed into her mind. Her heart broke then and there, with the meal and Gabriel waiting, with the sun sending its final, pink and golden light into the chamber. She covered her face with her hands and turned away and cried so hard she thought she would break apart.
His strong arms embraced her from behind. The warmth of a kiss pressed her crown. “Do not, Amanda. Please do not.” He turned her in his arms and she wept against his chest. “Forgive me, darling. I needed to think about some things. I did not mean to abandon you today or yesterday. I needed to . . . straighten my head.”
She had no idea what that meant, but she nodded. She pressed against him while he stroked her head and begged her to stop crying. She did eventually, dissolving into gasps and shakes while she regained some composure.
He guided her to the bed and sat with her there, waiting for it all to pass. She sniffed hard. “I did not mind that you were not with me. I understand that you face a duty that you do not like.”
“Ah, yes. Duty.” He gave her a kiss. “I think it is not my duty to punish someone more than a fair and honest judge would. It is misplaced honor to think I should. I know what I said to you, and the bargain we struck. It was a selfish one, born of a combination of hurt pride and anger.”
“I thought it quite fair.”
“You have blamed yourself more than necessary, darling. No one could expect you to do other than you did, with your own mother’s life at risk.”
“A thief’s life.”
“Yes, she is a thief. You are not. Not by nature and not by character. Even she saw it, from the time you were very young. She told me that. You were forced to play that role by Yarnell, but that is over now.”
She finally heard what he was saying. Really saying. “I will not sail to America after all?”
“Not unless you want to.”
“What if it comes out? It may someday. Yarnell may talk about it. The world could learn about us, about me. Your title, your name, could be tied to crimes that many will never excuse. What will people say if they learn of it, and it is known that you did not let a court decide my fate?”
“I expect many will say that the most decadent duke finally had his comeuppance, and from a little secretary at that. If there is scandal about the thefts, I will give the true story to Parnassus and live with whatever results.”
She barely breathed while her soul absorbed it. She gave a little laugh at her own astonishment. “I am glad you thought all day if you concluded I should have a pardon.”
“That is not what I was thinking about for so long.” He stood and offered his hand. “Come and share dinner with me.”
* * *
He opened the champagne and poured into the two glasses. Amanda’s high spirits delighted him. She looked so lovely in the light dusk that now lit the chamber. Beautiful and mysterious.
“What is that?” She pointed to several covered plates on another table.
“That is dessert. No peeking now. Eat your dinner.”
She did so, heartily.
“Amanda, in Colton, Stratton told me that I probably know you better than I do my oldest friends. I realized he was right. In the most essential way, I feel as though I know you better than anyone. I have never known a woman this way before, or experienced such intimacy. I never wanted to.”
“Your mystery woman is gone, you mean.”
“You misunderstand.” He took her hand. “I ache to know you in every way that I still don’t. I want to hear about those years at school, and the time you spent as a companion in the country. I even want to hear all about the scoundrel who seduced you. Everything.”
“That could take a long time.”
“Probably a lifetime, because just when I think I know it all, you will probably surprise me and reveal yet another mystery.”
Her expression transformed. Warmth and happiness deepened her gaze. “Are you saying that you would rather not part? That we can be together in London again? Lady Farnsworth did not appear nearly as shocked to learn about us as I expected, so if my situation with her can continue, we might be able to remain very good friends.”
Ah, sweet Amanda. She expected so little from the world. From him. “I would like to be more than friends, darling. I want to marry you. Please say you will. If you decline, I will never marry because, having shared love and passion with you, I am unfit for another woman.”
Her expression went slack. She peered at him, hard. “Is that wise? To marry me? A secretary and a thi—daughter of a thief?”
“Not at all wise.”
She burst out laughing. “You might have said you think it the wisest decision you had ever made, or at least something vague like, what is wisdom in the face of love?”
He laughed with her, then pressed his lips to her hand. “In the event you do not already know it, sometimes I can be an ass.” He looked in her eyes. “It is the wisest decision I have ever made. Promise me that I will have you my whole life, Amanda. I will go mad if you don’t.”
“I will marry you. Oh, yes, I gladly will.”
He raised her up so he could embrace and kiss her. “Are you finished with your dinner? Dessert still waits.”
She turned in his arms and lifted the covers. “Berries and Chantilly. I was disappointed the first time we met at your brother’s house that I had no time to indulge in them.” She stuck her finger in the cream and licked it, unaware of how erotic the little action looked.
“I was more disappointed than you were,” he said. “I had such plans for it.”
“Plans? Other than eating?”
He dipped his finger deeply, then stroked her mouth, and her neck, then the palm of her hand. “Most would be consumed eventually.” He flicked his tongue at the places he had painted.
Her eyes lit with excitement. “I think you should get me out of this dress, Gabriel. Quickly.”
He kissed her cream-smeared lips. He handed her the berries and carried the bowl of cream when he took her to bed.