Chapter Six
“I’m sorry, but I can’t be your mate. It’s not you. It’s the timing. I’m grieving the loss of my brother and now really is not a good time for me to start a relationship with anyone. It’s…well, it’s just that I’d be disrespecting Joshua by doing this whole mate thing right now.”
It wasn’t as easy to say the words as Jessie had thought it would be. They were certainly all the truth, so the pain burning inside had nothing to do with trying to believe a lie.
No, she knew that as truthful as those words were she wanted nothing more than to find a way to see past Ricard’s weirdness and love him. Her heart told her he was hers, but her mind screamed run.
Jessie watched him. The man was a Neanderthal, a very handsome and well maintained Neanderthal, but a Neanderthal.
Her comment had apparently shocked him into silence, which wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. She needed a way to pump the breaks on this situation. There was not one thing about Ricard that made her fear for her own safety, but she did worry about having an obsessed vampire follow her everywhere she went.
It occurred to her she didn’t know if she’d ever been bitten. “Have you…” Her fingers rubbed over her neck.
“No! Absolutely not. I would never…” His brow furrowed. “…not without asking, and I haven’t asked.” He looked down at his feet, and it appeared his cheeks colored. “I have to admit that eventually I will ask, but if you say no, then I would never.”
Dressed in jeans and a button down shirt with the sleeves rolled halfway up his forearms he stood before her. His beard and mustache were perfectly coiffed and his dark brown hair was cut shorter on the sides and a bit longer on top.
He was tall with strong broad shoulders and a muscular chest, which she remembered resting her head on as he carried her back to this apartment.
Without a doubt he was the most handsome, good-smelling man she’d ever met. He smelled of incense, sort of smoky and clean.
Jessie had never thought about incense until tonight, and now she wanted to burn it all night long.
As plain as she was seated in a vampire’s home she knew she wanted him. She wanted to have him all to herself for the rest of her life. She even wanted him to bite her, and that fact made her hate him. The fact that she could forget Joshua for even a second because of this guy was a travesty for which she could not forgive herself.
This night was turning out to be the worst night of her life. Nothing could compare to losing Joshua, but to add to the crap that was her life—the only man she’d ever met whose mere presence made her believe she could fly was a weird vampire.
The sight of Ricard knocked the breath from her lungs. He was attractive and she felt safe, so much safer than she’d ever felt, when she was with him.
But clearly he was an idiot.
Jessie would not be saddled with a moron or any man who did not know how to treat a woman. She’d rather live alone than be insulted about her hair, which, she could not change or fix no matter how hard she tried. These curls had a will of their own, and she’d learned years ago to stop trying to interfere.
There was no chance in hell she’d waste her life trying to please some man’s hair whims.
“You’re in mourning, and I should have realized that.” He shook his head and turned toward the wall.
The pacing started all over again.
“It was selfish of me not to think of this. I should have appreciated your need to grieve before simply taking you away and pouring out this dribble about the bond.” He turned to face her, stopping across the room. “Please forgive me. Finding you, a mate meant for me, was not ever something I thought would happen and so I was not able to control myself. I will be much more thoughtful of your emotions from now onward.” He gave a slight bow.
“Thank you.” Jessie was unsure of what to do next, and after a long and awkward pause Ricard spoke.
“If you would permit me, I’d like to give you something I believe will assist in your grieving process.”
“Oh, that’s not necessary. We just met.” She could not accept a gift from him. It would send the wrong message and again, it would be selfish of her to take gifts at a time like this.
“Please.”
The vampire stood waiting, unmoving. In fact, Jessie thought he did not even breathe.
It was clear he would wait forever.
“Fine.”
He exited the room through a door beside the waterfall and returned less than a moment later carrying a dog. “This is Canella. She is two and is a soulful little creature.” He placed the small mutt, who must have been part terrier, part poodle in Jessie’s lap. “She will be good company for you. I’ve enjoyed every minute with her.”
“I can’t take your dog.” The little animal wiggled into Jessie’s lap, climbing up her chest to lick her cheeks before nuzzling into her neck. “She’s so sweet, but I cannot take your dog.”
“It would be a great honor for me to give you Canella.” Ricard squatted at Jessie’s knee.
“But she’s your dog.” Jessie remembered having a dog and the feeling of loss when the pup died. She couldn’t possibly take away his pet.
Ricard smiled. “She is one of many. Would you like to see the others?”
Jessie nodded.
“Come.” He led the way to the door where Canella had been. “This door leads to the back entrance of one of the labs.” He pointed across the room. “That door leads to the bedroom and bathrooms, and over there…” He motioned to the kitchen. “That’s the kitchen, which is mostly empty right now, though I will remedy that tonight. The other door is the exit.”
He smiled at Jessie. “I know you are worried. I’ve made you nervous by being too assertive and maybe a bit out of practice regarding complimenting women. I must also admit I was very jealous of Rafe and Gabe and instinctually protective of you. But this is my home, and everything I have is yours. When you want to leave, that door across the room will lead you to freedom.”
Jessie cuddled Canella close and nodded. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” Ricard opened the door to a short hallway. “Get ready. They are not in cages tonight and they are loud.” He paused, holding the door for her. “As well, the two people who brought them here are visiting.”
When he opened the next door, it was as though they’d walked into a wild dog kingdom. Two big Labradors stood on the center island countertop, barking at each other. A German Shepherd sat at a desk chewing a pencil. Four very small dogs chased each other around the room, yipping. Lastly, a huge pig lay on its side while four puppies nursed.
A tall blond vampire and a woman with a solid gray streak of hair going through her black bob hair cut chased a beagle around the room.
“Oh my,” Jessie said.
“Well, yes,” Ricard agreed.
“Where are they from?”
“We’ve rescued them,” the woman called as she ran by. “Hunter! You’re not paying attention.”
“She rescued them. I was forced to drive them all back,” the vampire named Hunter said as he darted past, scooping up three of the small dogs before grabbing the fourth and the woman. “We’re Hunter and Alice.” He stopped before Jessie.
“Ooh, you’re giving her Canella. So sweet. Such a good girl.” Alice squealed and tussled Canella’s floppy ears. “She’s the perfect mating gift. Any dog really is. I gave Hunter three.”
“Gave me three, brought six, found four more.” Hunter released two dogs, and they took off running. “Let’s not forget the pig we picked up on the outskirts of the city.”
“Canella’s not a mating gift. She’s to help Jessica as she grieves,” Ricard said, closing the door.
“Oh, who will be the mating gift?” Alice asked as she bent to release the other two little dogs.
“There will be no mating at this time.” Ricard bent by the pig and checked on the puppies. “Perhaps in the future, but not now. There is no rush. Plenty of time.”
Had she blinked, Jessie would have missed the response. Both Alice and Hunter flinched.
“I’m sorry,” Alice said. Her eyes filled with tears and she turned away.
Hunter clasped Ricard on the back. “I’m sorry.”
“It is fine. The timing is not good for many reasons.” Ricard stood from the pig. “Jessica has experienced a terrible loss, and we have much work to do on this case with Panthera. With the death of Tyrone we need to work quickly to understand what he’s left behind and if Rollins really is taking over the running of Panthera. Timing is everything, my friends.”
Ricard’s face held a smile that Jessie knew he’d put there to hide his true feelings. Those feelings she felt as though someone had poked her heart with jagged glass.