Day Two

I stare at my ringing cell phone with an empty feeling in the pit of my stomach. My mouth is dry as I stare at the Blocked Number showing on the screen.

I woke up half an hour ago to the sun shining without a cloud in the sky. I felt great as I made some coffee and sat on the balcony, watching the turquoise waves roll onto the beach.

And now this.

These guys always ruin my day.

I should just let it go to voicemail, but for some reason I pick it up.

“Hello?”

“Is this Julia Tanner?”

I gulp. “Yes.”

“This is Richard calling from The Wellington Collection Agency. I’m calling about an outstanding debt that you have with us.”

This is a new one. I’ve been getting calls from Smith and Sons Collectors, the Samuel Group, and the Marion Debt Payment Group, but I’ve never heard of the Wellington Collection Agency.

“You owe us seventeen thousand, six hundred and twelve dollars,” he says.

I look in the mirror and watch as my face goes pale. That’s another seventeen thousand added to my tab of seventy-six thousand. I’m glad I don’t have a calculator on me or I would throw up.

“How would you like to pay?”

“I would like to pay with money, but I don’t have any.”

He doesn’t sound happy. “Then I guess we’ll be over this afternoon to repossess all of your stuff.”

He’s a little late for that. The Samuel Group already emptied out my closet. I had to hide these clothes in Cynthia’s garage.

“You have one week to pay what you are owing in full, or we’ll be forced to sue you.”

“I’m a kindergarten teacher,” I say, starting to panic. “How am I supposed to get seventeen thousand dollars in a week?”

“Steal your student’s lunch money if you have to,” he says. “That’s not my problem. You have one week.”

The phone clicks dead, and I drop down on the bed as nausea creeps up my throat. I’m so fucked.

I’ll be paying my debt until I’m eighty. I’ll never be able to retire, and what’s worse is no man will want to be with me if I have six figures in debt following me around like a weighted ball.

I close my eyes as I lie on my back, trying to calm the raging butterflies in my stomach.

My phone rings again, and without thinking, I answer it.

“Hello?”

“May I speak to Julia?”

I exhale in relief. Debt collectors are never this polite.

“This is her.”

“Hi, I’m calling from the Fitness Unlimited Gym. Unfortunately, your credit card has been declined for the past two months in a row. Do you have an active card that we can put on file?”

I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to keep from crying. “No. I’m all out of credit cards.” My mother cut them into plastic confetti.

“Well, then unfortunately we’re going to have to cancel your membership,” the voice says.

“Okay,” I say, trying to keep my chin from quivering. “I understand.”

The woman hangs up, and I turn off my phone before my hairdresser calls and tells me that I owe her all of my hair.

“Oh, Julia,” I mutter as I cover my eyes with my hands. “What have you done?”

I turn around, stuff my face into the pillow, and cry.

* * *

“Who’s ready to jump off a cliff?” Cynthia asks when I walk into the lobby. We’re all supposed to meet at eight thirty in the lobby, but He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is not here.

Maybe he took my advice from last night and jumped off his balcony.

I grin at the thought, but unfortunately, he comes strutting in a minute later looking hotter than ever in his board shorts with palm trees on them, and a white tank top. His arms and chest look massive in his tight top. For a second, I imagine how his big arms would feel wrapped around me before I catch myself and turn away with a light head.

He walks straight toward me, but it’s too early to deal with him. I’m still upset from the calls this morning, so I head to the safety of my friends rather than let him add to my agitation. I always feel better surrounded by the security of my fellow lionesses.

“I’m so happy that I’m pregnant and don’t have to do this,” Tanya says with a big smile on her face. Tanya is not too adventurous, and she’d much rather be watching from the boat.

Chase’s Navy SEAL friends are hanging around by the fountain near us, looking excited for the excursion. “At least you’re going to have a great view,” I say, grinning at her.

She leans in with red cheeks. “Pregnancy has made me so horny,” she whispers. “I saw a cucumber at the buffet yesterday and got turned on. This is going to be too much.”

Megan laughs. “You’re turning into your Aunt Ophelia. I knew it was inevitable.”

“I hope Ethan is rising to the challenge,” Cynthia says with a giggle.

“Oh, he is,” she says with a nod. “But I’m starting to tire him out. I’ve been craving sex twenty-four-seven the past month. Is that normal?”

“For someone turning into Aunt Ophelia it is,” Megan says with a grin.

“It’s better than the alternative,” I whisper. “I haven’t gotten any in months.” I’ve been way too stressed out to think about sex with all of my debt problems. And besides, where am I supposed to bring a guy home to? My parent’s basement?

We all get on the bus, and I make an effort to stay clear of Tucker. He sits with his mother in the back as I squeeze in next to Tanya. Megan and Cynthia are sitting behind us.

After about an hour of Tanya and Megan trying to get everyone on the bus to sing along to over a dozen songs, we arrive.

“Remind me never to sit next to those two again,” I whisper to Cynthia as we get out with our ears ringing.

She laughs. “I think I saw room in the trunk underneath the bus.”

“That sounds like paradise,” I say with a laugh. “We’ll hide in there on the way back.”

After we meet the guide, we begin the beautiful hike through the rainforest that leads to the cliffs. A lush canopy of gleaming leaves covers our heads as we walk along the worn path full of thick, twisting tree roots and sharp rocks. Monkeys are shrieking in the distance, and I look around for them but only see a scattering of colorful tropical birds singing on the large tree branches. The air is thick with heat, and it smells natural, like rotting vegetation. I’d much prefer a shopping mall, but this is okay too.

It takes Tucker less than five minutes to worm his way up beside me.

“I waited all night for a knock,” he says, grinning at me as he matches my stride. “What happened?”

“And I waited all night to hear the splat from you jumping off your balcony,” I answer back. “What happened there?”

He smiles. “Are you ever going to forgive me for what happened when we were kids?”

I narrow my eyes on him. “Are you ever going to apologize?”

“I’m sorry,” he says.

“Not accepted.”

He shakes his head. “Big surprise.”

My heart starts hammering in my chest as I remember all of the things he did to me. “You were such a jerk to me for years, and I’m just supposed to let it all go because you say two simple words? I don’t think so.”

“I wasn’t that bad,” he says with a shrug.

My body tenses as I turn to him with a clenched jaw. He can act like he’s changed all he wants to, but I’ll be damned if he thinks what he put me through wasn’t that bad.

“You made fun of me when I fell off my bike and scratched my knee,” I say, glaring at him. “You hit me and pulled my hair more times than I can remember. You called me names like Mosquito Bites and Julia Fool-ia. You tormented me for years. I hated you.”

A flush creeps up his neck and cheeks as he listens with a cringing face.

“You broke my recorder in the seventh grade,” I say, getting angrier as all the horrible memories come flooding back. “You stole my book report in grade three and tossed it in the sewer. You made fun of every pimple that I had. You made me cry more times than everyone else in my life combined. I hated you. I still hate you. And I will always hate you. Now please, fuck off!”

I storm ahead with heat ripping through my tense body. I’m grinding my teeth so hard that my jaw hurts as I charge up the path, leaving him behind me in my past where he belongs.

When I can’t take it anymore and finally turn to look back at him, I’m shocked to see him looking upset. His head is lowered as he shuffles along the path, looking embarrassed and full of regret.

I whip my head back around and stare forward with a clenched jaw. Don’t feel sorry for him. He deserves more than that.

This has been an all round shitty morning, and I just want to be by myself. I walk ahead of the group for a while, ignoring the beautiful lush rainforest around me, cursing the insatiable debt collectors, cursing the old Julia who couldn’t control herself with a small piece of plastic, but most of all, cursing out Tucker. I hate that he’s here, I hate that his presence is dragging up old painful memories that have been long forgotten, but most of all, I hate that all I want to do is slide my hands up under his shirt as I kiss his soft lips every time I look at him.

It makes me furious. He makes me furious.

I’m actually excited to jump off that cliff. Maybe I’ll get lucky and land right in a great white shark’s hungry mouth.

About twenty minutes later, when I’ve finally calmed down, he comes walking up beside me.

“What?” I snap, staring straight ahead. “If I didn’t make myself clear before, I don’t want you anywhere near me.”

“Oh, you made it clear,” he says in a soft voice. “I just wanted to give you a proper apology.”

I cross my arms and shake my head as I quicken my pace. “I don’t want to hear it.”

He speeds up, staying by my side. “I am sorry, Julia,” he says with a sigh. “I feel horrible for making your life difficult. I was young and very stupid. I had a weird way of showing that I liked you.”

His words are like a punch in the gut. I can’t breathe. I’m seeing stars. “What was that?” I choke out. “You liked me?”

He looks as shocked as I feel. “I thought that was obvious.”

“That was anything but obvious,” I say, staring up at him in disbelief. “I thought you hated me.”

His head jerks back like I slapped him. “I was in love with you. I was obsessed with you.”

My mind is racing. I close my eyes and shake my head, trying to clear the jumbled thoughts, but nothing is adding up. He was in love with me? Tucker? With me?

“Are you sure?” I ask, staring at him with a tightness in my chest.

He chuckles. “I’m sorry, Julia. I wish I had taken a different approach to showing you how I felt, but like I said, I was young and very stupid. I was afraid of my feelings, so I did the opposite of what I wanted. I guess I rejected you before you could reject me.”

“You did a lot more than reject me,” I say, taking a deep breath. “You made my life a living hell.”

He lowers his head and sighs. “I wish I could make it up to you.”

I cross my arms and look straight ahead. “You can’t.”

I quicken my pace again, but this time he stays back. I’m disgusted with myself that I’m sad that he does.

He’s your nemesis. Just because he’s hot doesn’t excuse him for all the shit he put you through. Don’t fall for his game.

A few minutes later, we arrive at the cliffs. “Oh, shit,” I gasp when I look over them. They’re higher than I thought.

The wind is fierce and unforgiving as it smashes into me, making my hair whip around. My stomach drops as I inch toward the edge and peek down at the deep water below.

Tanya is sitting in a boat that is there to pick us up from the rough ocean after we jump. She looks like a little minnow from this height.

“Holy shit!” Megan says, swallowing hard as she joins me at the edge. “We need parachutes to jump off this thing.”

Cynthia’s face turns white when she joins us. “I’m going to die before my wedding,” she says, looking paralyzed with fear as she peeks over. “It didn’t look this high up in the brochure.”

Chase’s Navy SEAL friends look excited as they take off their shoes and tie the laces around their arms. They’re used to more dangerous things than this. This is as relaxing as a spa day to a Navy SEAL.

One by one, they start leaping off the cliff, doing flips and spins and other moves that have us wanting to puke with worry.

They all land in the water and swim to the boat, laughing like they didn’t just risk their lives for a few seconds of fun.

Chase and Ethan approach the edge, grinning as they look over the deadly cliff from hell.

“That’s high,” Chase says with a laugh. “You girls can walk back if you want.”

“Can I walk back too?” Ethan asks with a gulp.

Chase grins at him. “No way. You’re jumping.”

Ethan looks up at the sky, says a quick prayer, then runs and jumps off with a howl.

My stomach drops as I watch him sail through the air like Superman and then land feet first with a huge splash.

“I’m not doing that,” Megan says, shaking her head. “Fuck this.”

She looks up at her husband Lucas, who is shaking in his flip flops. “I better walk her back,” he says with a gulp. They both hurry back down the path before anyone can make fun of them.

Chase grins as he looks at Cynthia. “What are you thinking?”

Cynthia’s jaw is clenched as she stares down at the water. The harsh wind is whipping her curly brown hair around. “I’m thinking I want to follow Megan and Lucas back,” she says. “But I’m also thinking that this is my wedding week and a perfect time to jump into things with both feet.”

Chase holds out his hand and grins. “That’s my girl.”

She takes a deep breath and then slaps her hand into his. “On three.”

The bride and groom kiss each other on the lips and then count. “One. Two. Three.”

My heart stops as the two of them leap over the cliff while holding hands. They land in the water down below with a huge splash, and I don’t take a breath until their heads pop out a few seconds later.

“I can’t,” I say, turning to catch up with Megan. Instead I crash right into Tucker’s hard chest.

“Not jumping?” he asks.

I shrug. “I don’t feel like dying today, so…”

“Okay,” he says, walking past me. “I’ll see you at the bus.”

I take a few steps and then stop. “Are you jumping?” I ask, turning around.

He nods. “Look,” he says before taking a deep breath. “If I die right now, I want to die with a clear conscience. I don’t expect you to forgive me, but I want you to know that I’m—”

I raise my hand, shutting him up. “I don’t want to hear it. You don’t get to have a clear conscience after what you put me through. Got it?”

“Julia,” he says, locking eyes on me. “I’m telling you. I’m—”

“Fuck this,” I mutter and just start running. I don’t know why I do it, but I just can’t stand to be around this guy for a second longer.

I sprint with all my might to the edge of the cliff and leap over with my arms and legs flailing.

I regret it as soon as my feet leave the ground.

My stomach is in my throat as I plummet down to the water with the wind whipping me violently. I’d scream until I pass out, but the air is ripped from my lungs, and I can’t make a sound.

A million thoughts race through my head, but I have a moment of clarity right before I slam into the water. One thought stands out.

I’ve always loved Tucker too.

The thought is as jarring as my landing. I slam into the water with a force that knocks the wind out of me. I rocket down into the depths of the ocean like a torpedo and don’t stop until the water is freezing cold and my head feels like it’s about to explode from the pressure.

I frantically kick my legs and swim up as my chest burns for oxygen. My head starts to get light as I run out of the air that it desperately needs. I kick and kick and kick as I force my mouth to stay closed. It’s demanding me to open it and take in a breath of air, but all it’s going to get is a mouthful of seawater.

Finally, my head pops out of the water, and I take the most glorious breath of air I’ve ever had. My arms and legs feel like heavy weights as I look around for the boat.

Oh no.

It’s too far away. The waves are picking up, and it’s drifted so far. Too far…

I can barely keep my head above water as my wet clothes and heavy shoes weigh me down. The tide starts taking me away from the boat, and I’m too weak to fight it.

I try to call for help, but I get a mouthful of sea water instead.

And then…

I start sinking.