My nerves were no better now than they had been before I ended things with Kane.

The nightmare had come again, although this time, it hadn’t featured Kane front and center. It was more like a vague blur of fogged memories, stuck on repeat in my dreams.

It had been several days since Michelle had called me to let me know she’d delivered the message to Kane, then offered a shoulder if I needed one. I’d almost took her up on that and I might yet, but I wasn’t sure I wanted to go down that rabbit hole, and all that might be exposed if I finally let myself open up.

Near the display in front of the store, I checked the time, eager to be out of there so I could go home and just…be away from people.

The bell over the door chimed, and I turned, a smile in place to greet the customer.

It froze as I saw who the customer was.

Chad.

Son of a bitch.

It was Chad.

“Raye…” He stepped toward me, an expansive smile on his face.

When he went to touch me, I backed away in a hurry, barely escaping his hands before he could put them on me.

He chuckled. “Sorry. Probably shouldn’t be going and hugging on you while you’re at work, huh?” He gave me a quick wink and looked around, rocking back on his heels as he did so. “I knew that was you I saw in here when I came by the other day. You disappeared so fast, I didn’t have time to talk to you. I guess you were going on break or something.”

“Or something,” I said stiffly.

My breathing hitched in my lungs, and my throat shrank down to the size of a pinhole, making it almost impossible to draw in air. Heart hammering against my ribs, I felt the tips of my fingers going numb.

Panic attack. I recognized the symptoms. I’d had them before but not recently. I had to get control of myself.

If I didn’t, I’d end up crouched in a corner and the thought of Chad seeing me like that was more than I could bear.

Breathe, I told myself. You can breathe.

Flaring my nostrils wide, I drew in a slow breath of air and forced my lungs to accept it. It’s mind over matter, Raye. Remember that.

Chad was still talking. I had no idea what he was saying.

I managed another breath.

Some of the white noise in my head retreated.

Swallowing, I darted a look around, hoping I could find one of my co-workers to dump him on, but the only one nearby was already talking to a young woman roughly my age.

Chad’s mouth finally stopped moving, and he stared at me expectantly.

“Is there something I can help you with?” I managed to say.

“Well, I’ll be honest…” He stepped in closer, but not so close that it would appear inappropriate to anybody standing nearby. “I came by to see you. It’s been a long time. I had no idea you’d moved to New York. Honestly, I haven’t seen much of you since…” His eyes narrowed as he cocked his head. “Man, I guess it’s been a couple years. Didn’t see you around much after that frat party. Hell, that was some party, wasn’t it? Remember?”

His tone dropped lower, almost intimate.

Did I remember? I felt like I was going to hurl. My hand clenched, and some part of me wanted to hit him.

“I’m afraid I don’t think a whole lot about that time, Chad,” I said, my voice rigid. “I left Texas A&M a while back, and honestly, that time doesn’t cross my mind much.”

Something flashed in his pale, watery blue eyes, and I braced myself for his reaction. But all he did was laugh. “Shit, maybe that’s the way to handle those wild times in college. We all have them, don’t we?” Another quick wink and he added, “You had some wild times, didn’t you, Raye?”

Wild times.

Son of a bitch.

That son of a bitch.

He sidled another step closer to me, and I backed away a bit, circling around the table to keep it as a barrier of sorts between us. From the corner of my eye, I saw that my co-worker had finished with the girl she’d been waiting on. “Chad, my shift’s nearly over so I need to go wrap some things up. I’ll turn you over to Emery, and she can help you with anything you might need here in the store.”

He opened his mouth to say something, but I flagged Emery down.

She was at my side, a bright smile in place before he could say a word, and I made quick my escape.

Darting into the back of the shop, I locked myself in the bathroom and braced my hands on the sink, staring at my pale face and struggling to keep the air going in and out of my lungs.

I had to breathe.

I had to keep breathing.

If I didn’t, I’d pass out, and even though he was in the front of the shop and I was back here, I refused to be in that sort of vulnerable position with him anywhere near me.

Turning on the cold water, I bent over the sink and cupped my hands under the flow, catching some and splashing it on my face. The encroaching fog washed back some. I breathed in deep. Splashed more water on my face. Breathed more.

Turning off the water, I stood there and focused on breathing.

After a couple of minutes, the rest of the panic edged back.

I needed to get out of there.

But the idea of going home no longer sounded at all appealing. Being at home where my memories swam in and engulfed me?

No, thanks.

But where in the hell was I going to go?

It wasn’t a surprise when a particular face flashed through my mind.

Kane.

I wanted to see Kane.

I thought about the nightmare but shrugged it off far easier than I had any other time.

Fuck that nightmare and fuck my nerves. I wanted to see Kane. He made me feel safe, and right now, I felt so far from that, it was almost laughable.

I peeked out the front and saw that Chad was still out there, talking to Emery. Grabbing my coat and purse, I slid out the back and hurried up W. 35^th. I was getting out of there and going to see Kane.

Hopefully, he’d understand that I just freaked out a little bit.

Maybe I’d explain why.

Michelle had offered a shoulder to cry on, but the shoulder I really wanted was covered in intricate tattoos.