Meredith

My weary eyes search Gabe's bedroom, confused at first by the absence of Pepto-pink walls. A yawn overwhelms me as I study the landscape for hints about the man whose bed I’m occupying. I lay back on the pillow, stretching my legs and arms as far as they’ll go, thinking about our marathon sexfest. I think about the things I had never done before. About a few things I didn’t know could be done, before last night anyway. I try to trace back which MacGyver-like position caused each soreness I feel in my everywhere this morning. And I smile, thinking about how quickly I’d do it all again, if Gabe were lying next to me. Where is he anyway?

The bedroom is big, but the contrast between this space and downstairs is noticeable. This is more of what I would expect from a bachelor. The walls are white and bare. The furniture, what little there is, has a contemporary, minimalistic feel. A dresser, a bed, no headboard. The room is neat. Everything looks as if it was placed there deliberately. I pull the comforter tight to my chest as I sprawl out in the empty bed. My hand brushes a piece of paper with my name written in block letters on the pillow beside me.

I feel compelled to take Gabe up on his offer, so I slide out of bed to rummage through his closet. I settle on a pair of much-too-big-for-me-sweatpants—their drawstring and bunched ankles will help them fit…ish—and a white t-shirt, like the one held hostage in my room at home. I’m sure I look like a ten-year-old wearing her daddy’s clothes, but hey, they’re comfortable and I like the thought of something of his on my skin. Another yawn reminds me of my need to caffeinate, prompting me to make my way downstairs for coffee.

A loose strand of hair dangles in my face and I loop it behind my ear as I pour myself a cup and recall the pie I never tasted last night.

I look to the refrigerator, deliberating whether or not I should indulge in the sweet temptation.

Gabe’s not here to see me make a pig of myself, and I do love pie.

After our workout, pie for breakfast isn’t a bad thing, right? Heck, my body probably needs the calories.

Satiated from the decadent treat, I top off my coffee and move to the porch to enjoy the morning while I wait for Gabe.

I lean back in an Adirondack chair, my feet dangling several inches from the ground. I am prepared to lose myself once again to my thoughts when I notice a cowboy hat tipped in my direction.

“Chet?”

“Morning. Been a long time,” a voice replies from somewhere under the brim of the Stetson.

I stand and walk to the guardrail of the porch. “I didn’t know you were back from your honeymoon.”

“Yep. We’ve been back a little while now. Two weeks away was nice, but I couldn’t leave Gabe alone any longer than that,” he says as he strides towards me.

I laugh. “Worried he’d burn the place to the ground?”

Chet leans against the railing of the steps and stares up at me with a serious look. “That’s what I’d tell him, but between you and me, I don’t worry about the ranch with him around. Didn’t feel right leaving him alone any longer. Plus, Christy’s far enough on in her pregnancy I sleep better knowing her doctor is nearby.”

“There you are. I wondered where you went,” a soft voice calls from the far side of the house. A moment later, Chet’s wife comes around the corner and waddles over to her husband’s side.

“Doc, this here is Meredith Still—she’s an old friend of the family. Meredith, this is my wife, Christy.” Chet’s introduction is succinct, as is his way.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Christy. And, congratulations to you both.” I lean down, extending my hand over the railing to shake hers. “If you don’t mind my asking, when are you due?”

Christy wraps her arms around her belly and smiles. “The doctor says I have five weeks left, but this little rascal hasn’t been still for more than an hour in I don’t know how long. So, I’m not convinced he’s gonna make it to term.”

“Shit,” Gabe says to Chet as he appears out of nowhere and climbs the porch. “I’ve been trying my damnedest to avoid you all morning.”

Chet clears his throat. “I’ve been looking for you. I tried to reach you on the radio, but you never responded.”

Gabe stands behind me and pulls me into him, resting his chin on my head. “Morning, beautiful. I hope you slept well. Did you eat?”

I nod (just not the eggs).

“Like I said. I’ve been trying to avoid you.” Gabe squeezes my waist. “I’ve got more important things to worry about today.”

Chet looks to me when he responds. “If I promise not to keep him long, would it be okay if we leave you ladies to talk for a few minutes while we look at something in the barn?”

“Umm.” I turn to Gabe, giving him my best, don’t-leave-me, I’m-sure-she’s-lovely-but-I-don’t-know-her look.

Gabe scoffs at his brother. “Twenty minutes and not a second longer,” he says to Chet.

I squeeze his hand, trying again to let him know I’m uncomfortable being left alone, but he doesn’t notice.

Chet kisses his wife on the cheek and tips his hat in my direction. “Nice to see you again,” he says. “Come on then, Gabe. Let’s get to it.”

I hold his hand as he pulls away. Gabe gives me a wink, oblivious to my need for him to stay.

Alrighty then, calm down. This wasn’t intentional. Note to self—subtlety with Gabe doesn’t work.

Christy and I watch the men as they walk away. She turns back and smiles up at me, and I feel compelled to make conversation. “Uh…I really am happy for the both of you. Chet’s a good man.”

“Thank you. He is—I know. So, you’re a friend of the family?”

My cheeks burn. “Well, yes. Technically. I think that was Chet’s way of trying not to embarrass me. Gabe and I were…high school sweethearts.”

Christy’s notices the too-big-for-me sweatpants and t-shirt and I can almost see the pieces coming together as her eyes go wide. “Oh. I see.”

“Yeah... ” I smile sheepishly. “It's...he's...I mean. I guess some lessons are just hard to learn. Gabe's kind of my Kryptonite. It’s all still a little confusing. ” I nervously tap my fingers along the railing. “I’m so sorry. I don’t mean to babble on about my situation. It’s just—I’ve been bottling my feelings up for weeks because I don’t have anyone to talk to. And…anyway. I’ll shut up now.” I turn a pretend key with my fingers to lock my lips together.

Christy carefully climbs the steps up the porch. “I can relate to having no one to talk to. When I moved out here from Pennsylvania, well, in the beginning I’d never felt more alone in my life.” She sits in the chair adjacent to the one with my coffee cup on the armrest. “You can talk to me. If you’d like.”

I shake my head. “That’s very sweet of you, but I’m sure the last thing anyone wants to hear about is some total stranger’s drama.”

“Hon, if you’re going to be the woman to finally tame Gabe Wilde, you’re gonna need someone to talk to. Come and sit.”

I pause, trying to decide if this is simply a polite offer, or someone whose traveled down a similar road and is genuinely offering an ear. “Really? Are you sure you wouldn’t mind?”

Christy pats the seat of my chair.

I sit and place my hand on her knee. “You have no idea how much I appreciate this. Because things might be getting a little crazy in my head.”

Don’t go overboard. Keep it high level, this woman is not your therapist.

“See, the thing is, everything is great. We’re having an absolute blast,” I begin as I sit next to her and pick up my coffee mug.

“That’s wonderful. Isn’t it?”

“It is. Or, I mean, it should be, right? ” I sigh. “But...see... ” I shrug and look Christy in the eye. “I don't know how much of this you already know. Small towns and close families being what they are.”

“Not much at all,” she says, sympathetically.

“My God... ” I draw my feet up into the chair and hug my knees. “I loved Gabe so much when we were kids. Like, so much. I couldn't imagine life without him, you know? ” I turn to Christy who nods. “And we were amazing together—until we weren't. But the way it ended...I was devastated. I didn't know how to exist without him. I had to totally rebuild myself, but it always felt like I was missing something. Years after I'd moved on, I'd find myself thinking about him. Wondering where his life had taken him, or what our life would be like if we’d stuck through the rough time. Even when it was completely inappropriate to do so. And now? It's been what, eighteen years? He says he's grown and changed. And that's true. ” I nod vigorously. “He's definitely different than when we were kids. But then again, he's not that different. He's still Gabe, you know? And here I am. My life is in shambles. A failed marriage under my belt. I'm living with my parents for God’s sake. Which is a whole drama in and of itself. And then? In walks Gabe—back in my life as if nothing ever happened. Being with him again feels amazing, but we already messed this up once. Is it really possible for two people to get it right on the second try?”

Christy nods thoughtfully as she soaks up everything I just overshared. When she’s ready to speak, she attempts to lean in but her belly gets in the way. She struggles briefly and then flops back in the chair with a sigh. “I swear, I am so ready to evict this little guy,” she says, rubbing the basketball in her lap as she closes her eyes. After a breath, she looks to me. “So, things with Gabe are great, at least right now?”

I nod. “Yep. At least right now.”

“And, you believe he is sincerely trying to show you he’s matured?”

I nod again. “I do. I mean, he’s definitely trying to show me he’s different. But part of me isn’t convinced he’s actually different. Or that I am. You know?”

“I think I do.” Christy smiles. “If you don’t mind my asking, what do you do for a living? I only ask because…well, are you planning to stay around Logan county and find work? Or will you end up having to move away again? Maybe, the issue is less about whether Gabe is right for you, and more about whether Gabe fits into your plans for the future.”

I pause, contemplating her words, but we’re interrupted before I have the chance to respond.

Gabe yells as he approaches. “Christy, would you be a dear and get your husband off my back? Twenty minutes my ass. Jesus, you’ve been home…what, not even a week and I’m ready for you to take him on another honeymoon.” Gabe’s face appears serious as he approaches the house, but when his eyes meet mine, his demeanor changes, softening to match his gaze.

Christy grabs the armrests of her chair with both hands, pulling herself out of the seat. “I’ll leave you two to talk. Sounds like I need to chase my husband down, anyway.”

Gabe takes her hand and helps her down the steps before climbing up on the porch to sit beside me. “You two have a nice chat?”

“Actually, yes. She seems like the kind of person you can’t help but enjoy being around.”

“True. She’s the complete and polar opposite of her husband.” Gabe laughs. “Now, how long do I have with you today?”

“You know me always busy, busy, busy,” I joke.

Gabe takes me by the hand. “Well then, why don’t you come inside, so we can make the most of the time we have.” The twinkle in his eyes makes his intention clear and the heat between my legs says my busy afternoon of watching tv and missing Gabe can wait a little longer.