Five weeks later…
This is bad, thought Hannah, checking her phone. But…it can't be?
Hannah sat on the side of the tub in her bathroom, her phone in hand. She stared hard at the pregnancy planning app, the one she'd installed back when she and her husband were planning for a kid, but before she knew that having one would be impossible. Hannah looked at the dates which confirmed that, just as she thought, she should've had her period weeks ago.
It can't be right. There was no way she could be pregnant; the doctor told her so himself. He had said that the odds of having a child were so low that it wasn't even worth considering.
But still, she was late. And on top of everything, she had a strange feeling, one that seemed to tell her that something had changed in her body. The dreams, too, had grown in intensity. Instead of once every week or so, they were now just about every night. They were strange dreams, ones that involved Hannah riding Alexander in his bear form to the edge of the forest. Each time they got a little closer, but the thick line of trees that made up the border always seemed just out of reach.
As she finished getting ready, Hannah did her best to try to put all of this out of her mind. But it wouldn't go away.
She tried to think of her options. I have insurance now; I can actually see a doctor. So, once Grace is at school, I'll make a quick appointment to see if I'm pregnant.
Her heart fluttered in a light panic.
Once the decision was made, all she could think about was what the results would say. Part of her realized how crazy it was to imagine that she was pregnant, but she couldn't think of any other explanation for what was going on with her.
"Morning,” Alexander said as Hannah entered the kitchen and made a beeline for the coffee pot.
"Morning!" shouted Grace, a big spoon in her hand as she sat at the kitchen bar and ate her cereal.
Hannah muttered her hellos and sipped her coffee as she looked out onto the city. The situation with Alexander was also cause for no small amount of stress; they'd been keeping what had been going on between them on the down-low for the last month or so, Alexander figuring that letting Grace know about their relationship wasn't something he was ready to do. Hannah wasn't crazy about all the sneaking around and sleeping in separate rooms, but she understood his concerns. Not to mention the lovemaking that they'd been up to was enough to make her forgive just about anything.
"Something up?" asked Alexander, seemingly picking up on Hannah's distance.
"Huh?" she said. "Oh, nothing; just didn't sleep very well last night."
"Well, grab a nap during the day if you need to," he said. "Gracie has her art show tonight at school."
"Yeah!” Grace said. "And you'd better be there!"
"Wouldn't miss it for the world, kiddo,” Hannah said.
"And,” Alexander said, "I'll be out this weekend for work."
"Oh, that's right,” Hannah said. "Time for the big contract operation."
Hannah still found it strange to talk about Alexander's security work as though it were any other office job. Not to mention just how nervous she got whenever he went out.
"That's right. So it'll just be you two girls."
Grace flashed a toothy grin, happy about her weekend of freedom.
"Okay,” Hannah said. "I think it's about time to get your little butt to school."
"Fine,” Grace said before drinking the rest of her milk from the bowl.
"And I need to get going,” Alexander said. "You girls be good today."
"We will,” Grace said.
And with that, Alexander was off. Hannah always found herself expecting a kiss as Alexander headed out the door, as though she were a housewife seeing her husband off.
Don't forget this is just work, she told herself. Just with a little extra…perks.
Hannah helped Grace get her things together and soon the two of them were out the door. As soon as Grace disappeared through the large doors of her school, Hannah yanked her phone out of her pocket and looked through Google for any doctor in the area who'd be able to run a pregnancy test. After a little searching, she found one that had a last-minute cancellation and would be able to get her in, provided she came as soon as possible.
Fear brewing in her stomach, Hannah rushed off to the doctor's.
***
Hannah stared with disbelieving eyes at the test results on the computer in front of her.
"This has to be some kind of mistake," she said. "I mean, I've been to a doctor before; they told me the odds of me getting pregnant were a thousand-to-one."
But sure enough, clear as day, was the word "positive" written in big, bold letters.
"And if I'd been your doctor, that's what I would've said too," said the attending doctor, a middle-aged woman with graying blonde hair. "We ran the same tests you'd had done before, and they showed that really, this shouldn't be possible."
"Then how am I pregnant?"
The doctor shrugged. "Well, the odds of dying from a spider bite are astronomically low, but every year it happens to a handful of people. Just because the odds seem impossible doesn't mean that it can't ever happen."
Then she looked away in thought.
"Still, according to this you should be essentially infertile."
"Does that mean…there might be something wrong with the baby?"
Fear gripped Hannah as she spoke; she was almost too afraid to ask the question for fear of the answer.
"It's hard to say so early, but from what I saw, everything looks good so far," said the doctor. "No signs of any complications. I don't want to speak too out of turn, but if things go the way they're looking now, you're due for a healthy baby. It might be a little premature, but I think it's okay for you to not worry. Maybe even get a little excited."
Hannah wasn't sure if that was the exact emotion she was ready to feel. Finishing up with the doctor, she walked out of the office and back out onto the city streets feeling as though she was having an out-of-body experience. Needing to sit down, she found a little bistro nearby and ordered a cup of coffee and a sandwich. Sitting on the terrace, she watched the world pass by in a blur.
What the hell do I do now? I'm pregnant. I'm actually pregnant.
But she knew the circumstances were hardly ideal. The father was a man who, not only was she not married to, but someone she wasn't even in an official relationship with. And they'd been as careless with their precautions during sex purely on account of Hannah telling him that she wasn't able to have kids. She felt like telling him that she was pregnant would be some kind of betrayal.
Time passed by, and Hannah's coffee went cold as she sat in her chair.
Should I even be drinking this? Is caffeine bad for babies? I mean, I know alcohol is bad, but I have no idea about coffee. Should I be taking supplements? What am I supposed to be eating?
The questions raced through her mind as she sat. Finally feeling too antsy to stay still, Hannah paid her check and forced herself to take a few bites of her sandwich before leaving.
She’d have to tell Alexander. But she’d wait until he got back from his mission this weekend. She didn’t want to stress him out too much.
Hannah took a long stroll through a nearby park, thinking back to the lovemaking her and Alexander had done in the woods the night she rode him in his bear form.
Bear…He's a goddamn bear shifter! What the hell does that mean? Is this kid going to be one too?
It was all so much for her to process. But in spite of her fears, the more she thought about it the more excited she became.
I'm going to be a mom.
A broad smile broke out across her face as she walked through the curving paths of the park, the noonday sun beaming down on her happy face.