Chapter Twenty-Nine

Blake

“It’s too late,” Blake told Cole, sitting on his brother’s couch, his head in his hands. He had driven straight to Cole’s house after leaving Kelly, his heart breaking in ways he hadn’t known were possible. “She’s so angry, she wants nothing to do with me.”

Cole sat down beside him, handing him a drink that Blake really wasn’t that interested in. “Give her time.”

“Apparently I’ve given her too much time.”

“She’s hurt, but she’ll come around,” Cole promised. “She knows that it’s best for the child to have both parents involved, and when she sees that baby, she’ll do whatever is in his or her best interest, regardless of how she feels.”

Blake stared down into the amber liquid in his glass. “And what if she thinks I’m not in the baby’s best interest?”

“Then she’s wrong,” Cole said firmly.

“Maybe.” Blake set the drink down and leaned back against the couch, looking up at the ceiling. “Maybe she’s right about me. I keep letting my fear get in the way of everything. I miss her so much when she’s not around, but when I’m with her all I do is trip over my own tongue.”

Getting up, Cole fixed a drink for himself, though he was clearly set to drink alone. “Do you want my advice?”

“I’m here, aren’t I?”

“At this point, words are not going to convince her. You need actions. You need to show her every day that you’re committed and that you’re not going anywhere.” Cole turned to look at him. “Are you willing to do that?”

“Yes. Absolutely,” Blake said dragging a hand over his hair. “I was trying to do that with my visit. Clearly, things didn’t work out that way. But how?”

“Little things,” Cole told him, waving a hand. “Send her flowers. Pick her up and take her to a doctor’s appointment. Read a book on pregnancy and then talk to her about what you learned. Sign up for a birthing class with her. Spend time in her apartment, doing things she likes to do. Rub her feet. Suggest baby names.”

It was a long list of things that Blake had absolutely no familiarity with, yet he suddenly found that he was willing to try all of them if it would bring Kelly back to him. Kelly and their baby. “How, though?” he asked again. “She doesn’t want anything to do with me.”

“Work your way up,” Cole suggested. “Start by sending her a letter every day. Write to her about the ways you’ve messed up. Write to her about what you’re nervous about when it comes to being a father. Write to her about dates you want to take her on. Send her flowers. Have a book she likes delivered to her. I promise you she’ll come around.”

Blake nodded slowly. “I could do that. I think. I want to try anyway. Nothing has ever felt so bad as her sending me away from her apartment. Nothing.”

“Then man up,” Cole suggested, walking back over and clinking his glass against Blake’s before taking a slow swallow and savoring the rich alcohol. “You can do it, bro. It’s not that different than wooing a client, right?” He chuckled at his own joke.

Blake’s mind, however, was on anything but business, for once in his life.

***

Dear Kelly,

I hope you read this. You have every reason not to, but I really, truly hope you do. I read the letter you wrote me. I was an ass not to answer it, or your calls, or your emails, or your texts.

Kelly, there’s no excusing my behavior, so I’m not going to try. I was cruel. Rude. Shallow. Juvenile. Irresponsible. Did I mention cruel? And the reason I did those things was even worse. I was afraid. So, cruel and cowardly. It’s a great look, I know.

But here’s the deal. However badly I screwed up, there’s more on the line than just my own ego and heart now. You’re involved. And so is our baby. Our baby, Kelly. We’re having a child.

I can’t thank you enough for being willing to force me to listen to you, so you could deliver the news that I’m going to have a son or daughter one day. And you were right. She or he isn’t a mistake or a complication. In fact, she or he may be the second-best thing to happen in my life, after you.

Yes, you. You come first, Kelly, from here on out. My dad was a pretty crappy old man, but one thing he and Mom did right was make their relationship a priority. He might have missed all our major life events, but he was there for Mom’s. Mom used to say that a couple has to come first, in order for kids to thrive. I think she was probably right. I aim to find out.

So I’m not giving up. Not on you. Not on us. And definitely not on our baby. This time I’m going to fight for you, Kelly. No matter how hard you push me away, I’m going to fight to make you give me one last chance, and that one last chance will make all the other ones worth your while, I swear.

If you try and disappear, I’ll find you. That’s a promise I intend to keep.

~Blake