Tessa

I wake up to a set of claws digging into my side.

Dick.

Drea’s cat. Well, really, her boyfriend, Scott’s. Two years ago, he asked me to cat sit while they went to Cancun for spring break and I’ve been trying to get him to come and take him back home ever since. I’ve tried repeatedly just leaving him at Drea’s, but inevitably, he finds his way back in through cracked windows or doors being held open a second longer than necessary. Doesn’t help that Drea doesn’t keep him locked in. Or that Scott seems rather disinterested in making the drive back home across town with him, but I’m not giving up hope on a Dickless life yet. Even if I have taken him to the vet twice and bought cat food every two weeks since I ran out of the first bag he came with. Dick is not mine. He’s not.

As soon as he feels me move, he switches positions and comes up to greet me, his motor-box running on overdrive. I laugh when his whiskers brush against my cheek, and finally, I open my eyes even though my alarm has yet to go off.

“Nothing like having a Dick in your face first thing in the morning,” I mumble quietly, although I suppose sarcasm is lost on cats. He noses me several times, waiting for me to finally reach up and scratch his ears. As soon as I do, he drops down on his side and goes back to massaging my ribcage with his pointy little nail extensions. I don’t even care. I’m actually smiling, his sense of contentment is so damn contagious.

Shit. Dick is mine. He is.

Slowly, I drag myself out of my make-shift bed compiled mostly of an old comforter and pillows stacked up in the rarely used and thus semi-empty dining room, and make my way out into the living room, cradling the cat like a baby while he curls into me. If only it was this easy with two legged men.

Drea’s still on the couch where Scott left her, but she’s awake and sitting up like maybe she’s been that way for a while.

“Aw, look at you holding Scott’s Dick in your hand.” She snorts, she’s so amused with herself.

“That joke never gets old,” I grumble under my breath, because sarcasm is also lost on early morning Drea. “Speaking of jokes, where’s Scott?”

She grimaces. She caught that one. “He took off a while ago. Had to get to work.” That explains why he was so agitated about not finding his keys last night. Also accounts for his sober state of being given the firehouse is no place for a hangover. For all his lacking heroics last night with Drea, Scott still turned out to be a decent human overall.

“I take it you two are over your little tiff from last night?” I ask, slowly moving my way around the room, still slightly distracted by the quiet purr of my cat.

“We had a tiff?” Of course, she doesn’t remember.

“You woke up in your prom dress. That didn’t trigger anything for you?”

She shrugs. “Not really. Woke up wearing my grandmother’s wedding dress last weekend. If that wasn’t cause for concern, I’m not likely to be all that worried about waking up in much of anything else.”

I take a minute to let her words sink in. “You ever think maybe you drink a little too much?”

“I’m pretty sure I do,” she agrees, “but you and Scott make it so easy to be reckless.”

I sigh, lifting Dick to mush his head to my cheek. Cat cuddles, man. “I’ll have to talk to Scott about that.”

“Be sure and tell him thank you when you do,” she says, waving her hand at me like she just remembered something.

“Why am I thanking him?”

She smiles, the way only a truly proud girlfriend could. “He unloaded your car for you this morning before he left.”

“He did?” Now I’m smiling. The way only the friend of a proud girlfriend could. “Scott is so nice. I don’t know why we’re always so mean to him.”

She throws her hands up at me, dismissing the statement. “He has it coming. Every time!”

I laugh. They’re a weird pair those two, but I can’t even imagine either one of them with someone else. They just...fit.

“Meanwhile, do I smell coffee? Please tell me I smell coffee.”

“You smell coffee.” She nods. “But it’s not ours.”

“What do you mean?”

She shrugs. “I got up to open the door to the balcony a little while ago because it was so stuffy in here. Scent must be wafting over from your place.” Despite the intruder’s efforts to make nice, I rebuked his suggestion we both spend the night together on account of knowing someone’s name not making them any less of a stranger.

“Is it? My place?!” I drop Dick in her lap and move on to the kitchen. I’ve got my hand on the door to the pantry when I hear her make an almost painful sound. “What?”

She makes a face to match the sound. “I forgot to pick up more coffee when I was out yesterday.” I get it now. The sound. The face. It was in anticipation of the pain I’m about to inflict on her.

“Drea! It’s coffee! Coffee should always be available for those who need it! It’s coffee for God’s sake!” I don’t know why I keep referencing coffee as if it’s a legally required beverage or something. Clearly, I’m the only one who understands and respects the importance of the coffee and one’s need for it. “I can’t believe you, Drea. I need the coffee. I need the coffee like I need the air. No air, no Tessa.”

She laughs at my plight. “I get it; you need the coffee like you need the crack. Why don’t you just go home and ask if Hot New Neighbor can spare a cup? Actually, that’s totally what you should do.” Her eyes light up and she’s suddenly wide awake. Scheming does this to her.

“You’re out of your mind. I’m not asking Hot New – Michael – for anything.” I look at the curtains blowing in from the balcony. “I am going to go and stand out there to try and get high on the scent though.”

“Get that crack, girl.” She giggles and hurls the one remaining throw pillow from the sofa at me, I guess in lieu of cracking a whip at my heels? I don’t know. I do know it hits me upside the head just as I reach the doorway, causing me to step outside looking even more disheveled than I did before.

“Good morning.”

I yelp. “Holy shit. You scared me.” I scramble to straighten my hair, or, at least push it back out of my face. On second thought, maybe I’m better off leaving it there. I’m fairly certain last night’s makeup doesn’t look so hot this morning.

“Sorry. I don’t mean to keep startling you.” But he’s grinning, so I’m thinking I don’t buy that.

“Well, stop creeping up on me and that won’t be an issue.”

He laughs. It’s a baffled laugh. Like he can’t believe the things I’m accusing him of. “I was out here first. If anything, you’re the one creeping up on me this morning.”

“I smelled coffee.” It’s the truth. It’s also the only thing I can think to say. It’s pretty much the only thing I can think period. And not because it’s the crack. Because he’s fucking gorgeous. Ugh. Drea was right. Hot New Neighbor suits him way better than Michael. I must have been really out of it last night not to notice sooner. Well, that and the whole thinking he was a rapist burglar thing did sort of sway my perception of him.

He holds up his mug. Steam is still coming out of it. He must have just refilled it. Bastard.

“Would you like a cup?” God, he’s so nice. Gorgeous and nice. That can’t be right.

“I’m dying for one actually. Drea’s pantry is deprived. Of coffee...” I’m rambling like a buffoon. If buffoons could talk. I think being around him is making me stupid.

“Deprived of coffee, huh?” I don’t think he understands the importance of the coffee either. This helps. He’s losing his appeal already. Plus, he’s still holding a cup of the liquid life source and I’m not, which honestly, I’m starting to feel a bit resentful over.

“When you asked if I wanted a cup, were you just inquiring out of interest or were you actually offering to share?”

He chuckles softly, holding up his finger indicating for me to wait before he disappears inside his – my - apartment. When he comes back out, he’s holding two big mugs.

Good God, he’s hot.

For a moment, he looks as if he’s contemplating the best way to hand it to me from one balcony to the other.

“May I?” I point over to his landing.

“Come over here?” He doesn’t seem to think that’s possible. Little does he know that before Drea landed this place, I was neighbors with Always Locks His Keys Inside Lucas.

Always Locks His Keys Inside Lucas was never comfortable with handing out a spare set of keys, but had no problem with leaving his balcony door unlocked and asking me to break into his apartment on a regular basis. Always Locks His Keys Inside Lucas is in jail now. Broke into someone’s house. Some nights I worry I gave him the wrong idea about things.

I wave my hand impatiently to get him to back up. I really want that first sip of coffee to happen while it’s still piping hot. Holding onto the outside light, I step up onto the railing and then climb into the frame of the window separating our unit from his. If I had a fear of heights this would be problematic, as it is, I pause briefly to remind myself that this is smarter than walking through the apartment and out through the front door because this way Drea can’t see me, then continue onto the neighboring window where I can repeat the steps I took leaving Drea’s balcony to join Michael on mine.

I’m about to hop off the railing and into safety when his hand comes out to assist me. Out of habit, I reach for the light again, cursing myself and my stupid instincts as I do it. Holding his hand would have been nice.

“Impressive.” He grins, retrieving the cup he set down when he thought he was going to help me down, and handing it to me.

“Back at ya.” The words slip out before I can stop them.

His eyes narrow and an awkwardness creeps in. “Excuse me?”

“The coffee,” I say, hurrying to actually have a sip, “it’s impressive. I could tell just by smelling it.” The coffee’s not bad. But it’s not leaving nearly the impression his naked body did last night. Which is somehow all I can think about, now that I’m standing here, looking at him fully clothed. I missed a lot of details during our first interactions. Many of which are coming back to me in a rush of blurred images, bleeding into my mind one after the other, making themselves far more comfortable than I’d like.

He’s tall. I’m tall and I have to look up to talk to him. But, he’s not lanky like most dudes his height. He’s got sturdy, broad shoulders and an overall body that looks like it moves often and well. But, he lacks the gym body bulk, which I sort of loathe. I always imagine gym bulk to be the equivalent to fake boobs. It’s perky and big and perfect, but it’s just not natural. Neither is the ink which, as I can attest to, covers the majority of his skin, but I can very comfortably call that art, and art is like a step up from natural. So, you know, it works.

It’s not just the body though that earned him the Hot New Neighbor label. His face is pretty damn nice too. Strong jaw, slight stubble which blends in with the dark fuzz he’s got growing on his head. He’s not bald, or even balding, but he does seem to take a low maintenance approach to hair. It suits him. He’s not a slick back or faux hawk kinda guy.

I’m still contemplating whether or not I’ve seen his full lips stretch into a real smile yet, when he takes a sip of coffee, his mouth disappearing in his cup completely. Automatically, my gaze shifts to his eyes, and stops. I can tell from the way the corners of his baby blues crinkle, he’s laughing at me for some reason.

Some reason. Like maybe the obvious way in which I’ve been ogling him for the last few minutes.

Oh, God.

“Well, this has been...interesting.” I lift my hand to catch the light fixture and pull myself back up onto the railing in a hurry. It’s going to be slightly trickier now with one hand, but I can make it work. I have to. “Thanks for the coffee.”

“It’s the least I can do, considering.”

I jump down – careful not to spill, landing safely on solid ground again. I notice he’s still standing there watching me. “Alright, so...have a nice day.” I do a half wave sort of gesture and hurry for the door. I’ve got one foot in when I hear him again.

“Let me know when you’re ready to talk about our situation.”

I shake my head and move out of his sight, scowling at Drea who’s perched on the sofa anxiously awaiting a full report on my coffee escapades with Hot New Neighbor.

“Don’t. There’s nothing to smile about.”

She doesn’t believe me. “Um, hot new guy - living in your apartment. What’s not to smile about?!”

“The list is long, Drea,” I counter, “but while we’re on that, how could you go all summer and never mention that the new neighbor moved into my apartment?!”

She shrugs. “It’s your apartment. Kinda figured you knew.”

“Yeah. Well, clearly I didn’t.”

“So, now that you do, what are you going to do?”

I frown. “Is that your subtle way of kicking me out already?”

She laughs. “I’m not subtle, Tessa. Ever.”

“Point taken.” I have another drink of my coffee. It’s getting cold already. That’s what I get for wasting all my precious time ogling. “I don’t know what I’m going to do. He’s got a lease. I don’t think I can kick him out, even if I am his new landlord.“

“Or roommate.” She wiggles her brows at me.

“Don’t do that, it looks creepy. Creepy and crazy. Both of which I think of when I consider moving in with a man I know nothing about. Who moves in with a perfect stranger? No one. No one sane anyway.” Drea’s up off the couch and attempting to take the mug out of my hands as I’m speaking. Apparently, the crazy has a strong hold on her this morning. “What are you doing?”

“I just want one measly little sip.”

“Fine. I’ll save you one.” I turn away so my cup is out of her reach.

“Ew. I don’t want the last sip. It’ll be all grounds and backwash.”

I shrug. “Hey, desperate times and all that. Take it or leave it.”

She fakes gagging. “I’ll leave it.”

Thought so.

The clock behind her catches my attention in the middle of it all. Doing morning gymnastics to get my coffee took up more time than I allotted for coffee consumption today. My ass needs to hit the shower, asap. I’ve got my first class in less than an hour, and contrary to Drea’s beliefs, the first week of classes does count.

I’m almost to the bathroom when I notice Drea is hot on my heels.

“What are you doing? If you don’t walk away within the next ten seconds, you’re going to see me naked.”

Drea rolls her eyes at me and leans against the wall, just in case I didn’t get that she was planning on sticking around despite the nudity threat.

“Why? Just...why? I know I did a striptease that one night during our freshman year, but that’s not the norm. So, if you’re sticking around for a show, you’re not gonna get one.”

“You’re an idiot, and also, a mediocre stripper. I’m here for more dirt on the neighbor, not your titties. Explain yourself. Why are you so against getting to know him and just making this situation work?”

My fingers are gripping the doorframe impatiently. I don’t like running late and having to rush. But I’m pretty clear on the fact that Drea isn’t leaving until she’s satisfied.

“He was naked.”

Her eyes widen. “On the balcony?”

“No! Last night, when I busted in on him. He was completely naked. I saw...everything.”

“So?”

“So, now it’s weird. I can’t look at him and not see him naked,” I hesitate to tell her the last humiliating bit, “and...I’m pretty sure he knows.”

She smirks. “Can’t stop staring at his crotch, or something?”

“Drea!”

She laughs. “What?! You’re the one talking about his nakedness being a distraction.”

I sigh. “The whole thing is just too weird. And frankly, he would be nuts to agree to living together after what he’s witnessed from me thus far.”

“Because you’re the scary stranger in this equation now?” Drea’s tone of disbelief is only slightly hidden in her desire to keep up with this conversation and the winding trail of thoughts I’m taking it on.

“I tried to kill a naked man with Aunt Edi’s umbrella.”

Amusement twists her mouth up as she tries hard not to laugh again. “Man, I’m never drinking again. I miss all your best shenanigans when I’m passed out.”

“This is serious, Drea. There’s a stranger living in Aunt Edi’s room. Sleeping in her bed. Using her old dresser. All of her stuff is still in there. I’ve spent weeks, dreading the moment I would have to come home and face all of it, knowing she would never come back to claim it, but to come home and find him? Invading her space, taking it over? If I take even a nano-second to truly think about what that means, I will lose it.” I shake my head. “I can’t live with him. I can’t even think about him. I just want him gone and the condo back to the way it was before.”

All laughter has died from Drea’s face. “It’s never going to be the way it was before, Tessa.” She reaches her hand out to squeeze mine. “Maybe that was Aunt Edi’s whole point for moving him in. Making it as non-like it was before it could possibly be.”

“I don’t think Aunt Edi did this, Drea,” I say quietly. “I think it was Meredith. We all knew Aunt Edi was dying. It’s the whole reason we all went up there, to say good bye. Makes sense Meredith would lease out the place. She’s the oldest, handling assets falls to her. Just turns out, the condo wasn’t one of them.” That part surprised me as much as anyone.

Drea smiles sadly. “Well, jokes on her, I say. He’s gorgeous and seems nice. I bet he’d switch rooms with you in a heartbeat if you asked.” She shakes my hand back and forth trying to wiggle me out of my funk. “Just give this a chance, Tessa. Aunt Edi would be the first person to point out that everything happens for a reason. Even this.”

“But...it’s weird. And he could be weird. And unstable. Possibly even dangerous. Although, he does make a solid cup of coffee. But that doesn’t speak to his sanity. Plenty of crazy people are fond to the caffeinated brew. Probably aids them in their craziness. Gets them all wired and shit.”

“Yeah,” her eyes bulge out dramatically, “I’m aware.”

“Fine. I’m crazy, he’s crazy. We’re clearly meant for each other,” I release in a loud exasperated huff. “Now then, can I please get in the shower before I miss my first class completely?”

“Who’s stopping you?”

Unbelievable.

––––––––

WEIRD. AND UNSTABLE....and Possibly Dangerous Hot New Naked Neighbor.

I like her.

That’s going to be a problem. Especially since I’ve already offered to room with her once. What’s to stop me from doing it again? And this time on a more permanent basis? It has bad idea written all over it.

For starters, she’s young. Way young. And most importantly, she’s female. And females are not included in my current life plan.

Then again, she’s young. Way young. Even if we did decide to suck it up and deal with our current living situation as it is by rooming together for the time being, nothing would happen. Nothing.

“What are you looking at?” I demand of Mr. Grey Cat. He’s not my cat, hence the really lame not really his name - name, but he’s been coming around ever since I moved in here, and I let him, because, well, sometimes it’s helpful to one’s sanity to not technically be talking to yourself. He doesn’t answer of course, but I still get the sense even he knows I’m lying to myself where Tessa is concerned. Then, because he’s a cat and cats don’t give a shit, he lifts his snooty little nose and turns away, tail slinking along behind his lanky body as he makes his way out onto the patio. I probably won’t see him for a while after he disappears out there. Wherever he lives, and whoever he belongs to, must be close by.

With my last cup of coffee having been donated to the cause for the sake of the greater good this morning, I’m out of reasons to procrastinate. Time to get this day rolling and face the next phase of operation ‘New life and New Michael’ - The new job.

By the time I’m showered and dressed I’m back to looking for ways to waste time. I guess that’s what living alone is. Time. Time I used to be able to fill with taking turns or, simply waiting. I never took into account just how much of my time was taken up through the basic dynamics of coexisting with another human being, and I certainly never expected how empty those moments would turn when alone.

I’m on the verge of heading outside and tracking down Mr. Grey Cat, just to have another living being to talk to, when there’s a knock on the door, followed by a key turning just before the whole thing swings open.

“Sorry!” she calls out, passing me in a hurry. Her hair is soaking wet and her body is wrapped in nothing more than a rose-colored towel that barely reaches beneath her ass. Practically running isn’t helping her parts stay covered either.

Averting my eyes slightly too late, I retract my previous plan to converse with the neighbor’s cat and opt for Tessa instead. She’s already far more interesting than any four-legged fur ball will ever be.

When I find her, she’s hunched over in the most dangerous position imaginable, searching her mountain of bags for something I’m hoping covers her more than that towel does. Well, I’m sort of hoping. Sort of not.

“I’d apologize more thoroughly for busting in on you twice within the last twenty-four hours, but this is partly your fault, so I’m not gonna,” she mutters, digging through a large duffle bag.

that confused about whether or not you’re breaking in, we can call the cops and ask them. I’m pretty sure that won’t play out well for you though, what with my lease and all. And second, I’m still not clear on how any of this can be blamed on me. As far as I can see, I’m the only real victim in this mess.”

A sage green shirt whips out from the depths of her bag as her hand flies up into the air in some sort of act of victory. It’s short lived however, and she pursues her search for more articles of clothing in the next suitcase over. “Victim, my ass. I’m the homeless one here,” she grumbles on, “and you might have mentioned that all of my possessions were delivered to you when I was here earlier for coffee!”

I shrug. “I figured you already knew that. It’s your stuff.”

She stops, adjusting her towel in a huff. “People really need to stop making assumptions like that! I’m not nearly as well informed as everyone thinks.”

I lean my shoulder into the doorframe, crossing my arms over my chest and settling in for the duration of this chat. “I’m starting to learn that about you. What’s up with that? Do you lack a healthy sense of curiosity? Too self-involved to ask a few questions every now and again?”

Her eyes widen and I notice the striking green of her irises has brown flecks near the pupils. I also notice she’s pissed. And alarmingly close to bursting into tears.

“Are you kidding me with this?”

“Shit,” I drop my arms and step into the room, squatting to be at eye level with her. “No. I mean, yes. I’m kidding. I’m sorry.” I run both palms over my face trying to conjure up a clear thought that isn’t in some way tainted by her beautiful eyes or the distracting way more of her skin keeps popping out of that towel. “It’s been a weird night...and morning, for me. For both of us. I’m sure this isn’t easy for you. Making stupid jokes is just my way of making light of it all.”

I start to reach for her shoulders then stop short. I have no business touching this girl. And the last thing I want to do, is freak her out even more than she clearly already is. “What can we do to make this work? For both of us.”

She sits back on her duffle bag, sighing loudly. “Do you really think we could live here together?”

No. Definitely not. As a matter of fact, seeing her in her towel is all the proof I need to be completely certain it’s the worst idea in the history or worst ideas. However, I find myself nodding and saying, “Sure.”

“Have you ever had a girl for a roommate before?” she asks, like someone who thinks it’s important to ask questions, but has nothing really specific they want to know.

“Yep.” She wasn’t technically my roommate, but close enough.

“And your name’s not going to pop up on any sex offender list, right? Because I’m gonna check.” Her pointer finger darts out as a warning as she says it.

“Clean record. Promise.” I hold my hands up, demonstrating my innocence. “Had to pass a background check before my lease was even approved.”

This information does seem to appease her.

Then a second wave of shadows moves in over her face. “There’s something else.”

“Name it.”

“It freaks me out...you staying in my aunt’s room.”

I can see how that might be a bit much, given her current frame of mind after just having lost her. “I can move into this one.” I take in the purple walls, remembering why I chose the other room in the first place. “Provided, I’m allowed to paint.”

“You’re allowed.” She smiles. Briefly. It’s sweet and innocent, combined with her flushed rosy cheeks and fresh, clean skin, there’s no denying she’s a natural beauty. I wonder if she knows. Probably not. She seems unusually unaware of herself.

“So, it’s settled?”

She nods. “Looks like it, Roomie.”

I grin. This is such a bad idea. But she’s such an excellent distraction. And I could really use one of those right now.