Chapter 19
“Chaos is a friend of mine.” - Bob Dylan
Avery
“Well?” I asked as the thick air of silence hung like a shroud over us, “Is Mandy the girl you left behind, Bryce?” My voice cracked and I hated that it did.
Bryce turned from me and ran a hand through his still damp locks. “Come in,” he said, “Tell me what she said.”
I followed him inside and watched as he went through the motions of pulling his boots on. He was too calm. Too devoid of emotion. I was freaking out here but Bryce was cool as a cucumber.
“She showed up at the house looking for you. My dad answered the door. He came up and got me to fetch you. Her belly is out to here,” I continued, “And she has a black eye. She said you’re the father. There. You now know as much as I do, Bryce. Who is this girl to you?”
“She’s nothing to me, Avery,” he said with a sigh, “We had sex one time. I used protection. She’s probably lying about it all. I’ll go talk to her. Send her on her way. I don’t do drama.”
That wasn’t an appropriate answer in my book. “You admittedly had sex with her,” I snapped, “As much as you want to send her on her way, one night stand or long term relationship, the girl came a long way to find you if it’s a lie, don’t you think? Why now?”
“I don’t know,” he snapped, “I’ll deal with it, Avery. This has nothing to do with you.”
“Nothing to do with me? Seriously, Bryce? How can you say that? It has everything to do with us! You realize this is a no-win situation, right?”
He stood there, one hand on his hip, the other rubbing his stubbled jaw and gazed down at me under those thick, sooty lashes. “Don’t start tripping, Avery. You’re jumping the gun here. I need to get the facts first.”
“You do that, Bryce,” I snapped, “And then you tell me where we stand,” I finished, turning on my heel. “I’ll send her up to your cottage. We don’t do drama at the main house.”
I didn’t give him a chance to respond. I was out the door and jogging down the walkway towards the steps. My mind kept replaying those two words over and over again: Why now?
This was an impossible situation. Bryce was simply avoiding the obvious. If he turned his back on this girl who was possibly carrying his child, I’d never respect him again. If he did take responsibility for her and the child in some way, we would never be the same. I could see this, why couldn’t he?
Tears blurred my vision as I went through the back door into the house. My father was right there, pulling me into his arms. “Can you have someone take her to Cottage 3, Daddy?” I asked, trying to muffle a sob. “That’s Bryce’s cottage. I’m going to my room. Can you let Mom know I won’t be going to the barbecue today? I don’t feel well.” I pulled away from him, taking the back staircase up to the second floor, running to the solace of my room before my tears let loose full force.
About an hour later there was a soft tapping on my door. “Avery?” Mom called out, “Can I come in?”
I pulled myself up into a sitting position, and wiped my eyes. I was all cried out for now. “Come in,” I said.
She came in and by the look on her face, Dad had filled her in on everything. I was glad he did. I doubted whether I could’ve made it through the story without shedding more tears.
She sat down on the edge of the bed, and brushed a few locks of hair off of my face. “You know, these things have a way of working themselves out. I know at the moment you must be feeling vulnerable and threatened by what happened, Avery, but I want you to stop and think about the girl who showed up here. Can you imagine how scared and vulnerable she feels at the moment?”
“I get that, Mom,” I replied, “But why now? I just don’t get it.”
“Maybe she had her reasons. But if you really care about Bryce, which appears to me you do, then you have to give him some space to deal with this situation. Trust him to do the right thing.”
“That’s just it, Mom,” I said, my voice sounding small and defeated, “I think he will do the right thing, and it scares me. I know that sounds selfish, but it’s the truth.”
“Just give it time, sweetie. One way or another, it will work itself out. If it’s meant to be, it will be. Nobody knows that better than me.”
“It hurts, Mom. We’ve barely just begun, but it hurts so much. I think I might love him.”
She wrapped her arms around me in a motherly hug. “Sometimes love can hurt. But you can’t go through life without risking it, sweetheart, I can tell you that much. We’re all here for you, Avery. Now come on, we want you to go with us to the barbecue. Believe it or not, your family will always be there to support you in times like this, so consider it one of the perks in having a large one, okay?”
I nodded and gave her a hug back. “Give me ten minutes, Mom. I’ll be ready.”
It turned out Mom was right about family. I filled the twins in on the latest, and although Hannah knew Bryce from over the summer, Sarah was just as horrified as her twin. “What do you think he’s going to do?” she asked. “How can he really be sure he is the father if this chick is well…easy?”
“Duh, Sarah, have you heard of DNA testing?”
“Well yeah. But they can’t do that until after the baby is born. When is she due, Avery?”
“How the hell should I know? You two know as much as I do. All I know is this: from this minute on Bryce Slater is history for me. I know Mom is trying her best to soothe my hurt feelings, but I’ve kicked into survival mode now. I will wipe him from my mind and go on with my life. I no longer have any expectations. He said it has nothing to do with me, so be it. He has nothing to do with me from this point forward,” I said, taking a sip of wine. My mother hadn’t objected when I’d poured myself a glass.
I was nineteen. Not officially legal, but I felt as if the last few hours had pushed me up and over the age of twenty-one, so I deserved it. At least, that’s what I thought.
She hadn’t seen me pour the other two though. By the time we left for home, Bryce Slater was absolutely positively the last person I ever wanted to see again.
Unfortunately, he was the first person I saw at the barn the next morning as I finished writing up the two page list of additional things I needed him to complete for the day. Yeah, I knew it was a bitchy thing to do, but what the hell? I was hurting. Being a bitch was my coping mechanism of choice.
“Hey,” he said coming up beside me as I stuck a tack into the list I was placing on the bulletin board that hung over the time clock, “I wanted to talk to you. I’m getting my phone reactivated today, but I needed to see you before that happens. I owe you an explanation.”
I turned to face him, looking up into his tortured eyes. “You owe me nothing, Bryce. I’m late for class. Here’s your list for today.”
“Avery–wait, please. I need to talk to you. I need to see if it’s okay if Mandy stays with me…well at least until I get things figured out. She has nowhere else to go.”
My heart crumbled into a million tiny pieces. He was going to live with Mandy. They were expecting a baby together. I could never ever compete with that. “Sure Bryce, no problem. Just make sure there’s no drama or all bets are off. I have to go.”
He reached out, grabbing my arm as I turned to leave. “Will you please fucking let me explain shit to you?” he demanded, his blue eyes now morphing into a scary shade of dark grey. “This isn’t as simple as you think.”
“It’s perfectly clear to me, Bryce. You and me? Yeah, that’s over. So, if you want to cohabitate with Mandy, raise a family in that tiny cottage, well–that’s your gig. But the first time it becomes a problem for Sinclair Stables, LLC, all of you are out of here, got it?”
His eyes blazed a hole in me. I couldn’t believe my words and I’m the one who’d just tossed them out there. He studied me for a moment in disbelief. As if I was the one being unreasonable. Fat freaking chance.
“Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a class to get to. Make sure you get everything on this list completed to my satisfaction.” I turned and walked toward the door of the barn, but I heard his words behind me.
“Yes’m Ma’m. I sure will,” he said with a Southern drawl that he didn’t own and a military salute.
Fuck him for mocking me.
Fuck him for breaking my heart.