Patience breathed in deeply and exhaled slowly, begging the ache in her chest to subside; however, it persisted. Would likely stay for some time, much like those endless months following her mother’s passing. Perhaps the ache would never fully disappear, and the piece of her heart that hadn’t left this life with her mother would remain with Sin wherever he journeyed.

The tragic part was that he’d never even know what he’d taken from her.

No, not taken.

She had freely given a portion of herself to him, foolishly thinking he’d nurture and cherish it. She’d outgrown the notion everyone wanted to—or could—be saved, despite her best intentions. If anything, her time in society had taught her that. But she’d allowed her guard to fall.

And this was her punishment.

How could she truly believe she’d given him a portion of herself and yet, never had their lips touched? And now their time together had ended without so much as even a chaste kiss.

It was time she faced it head-on, dealt with her father’s disappointment, made amends with her siblings and decided what direction her life would take in the coming years. Would she move to her family’s country estate and withdraw from society altogether? Could she live a content life without having a cause to champion? Maybe it was long past time she learned.

Patience would not miss London, certainly not; however, she would mourn the distance between herself and her family. Would they visit during the holidays or invite her to return to town to spend the Christmastide celebration with them?

What was the deep of winter like on the island of Brownsea? Did the tides rise? Was the land shrouded by the same gray darkness as London? Did they dine on fish instead of duck and pheasant? Were their soups heavy with crustaceans and fresh vegetables?

Was the crisp breeze from the sea preferable to the coal-tainted air in town?

All things Patience would never know and would be best to keep from dwelling on.

Once she opened her eyes and returned to the house, her moment of mourning would be at an end. Dwelling on something one could not change was a waste of time, though it had taken Patience five long years to realize that fact.

The cold breeze licked at her cheeks, and her nose tingled.

The night grew late, and Patience needed to return inside before the chill settled in her. With any luck, her father would have retired to his private chambers or locked himself away in his study, and she could slip through the house unnoticed. In the morning, she would throw herself at his mercy. No matter what it took, Patience would make things right with her father…she would make it right for everyone. Perhaps she owed Lord Holstrom and his wife an apology, as well as the other gentlemen of the ton she’d harassed over the years.

But not tonight—now, she would retire, though sleep would certainly not drag her down into its inky depths and banish her misdeeds.

Patience hesitantly opened her eyes, the dim night almost too bright after the darkness behind her lids. The sting was a welcome distraction from the emptiness that echoed inside her.

Too quickly, the pain subsided, and her vision focused.

She wasn’t alone in the garden.

“Sin?” Her hushed tone barely traveled farther than her parted lips. “What are you doing here?”

The sight of him, still raw and ravaged from his fight, burned into her memory. She’d never thought to see him again, had never dreamed he’d come to her. Or that her heart would soar at the sight of him, even in his ragged condition.

He was before her in the blink of an eye, and he swept her into his arms—his powerful, comforting embrace—pulling her body against his. Every muscle in his chest and abdomen pressed solidly against her softer flesh as if no barrier lay between them.

Caution prickled within her. “You are injured, Sin. Did the physician examine your hands before you left Seven Dials? I can summon Dr.—”

“Shhhh.” His breath fogged between them. “Do not worry about me. It is you who is hurt, and I am the cause.”

Her stomach fluttered at his words, the emptiness within her suddenly filling as if it had never been as his lips stopped a hairsbreadth from hers. Only a mere tilt of her head and their mouths would meet. Desire pooled at her core, urging her to move and bring them together, but she hesitated when he spoke once more.

“I never meant to cause you pain, Patience,” he confessed, his brown eyes locking on hers in the night. “However, I allowed my own needs to preclude everything else.” He shook his head, their bodies breaking apart. “No, I will not make excuses for my deplorable behavior and cowardly actions.”

Cowardly? Sin was the furthest thing from that.

“Do not say such things,” Patience said, her hand finding his and squeezing it gently. His knuckles likely ached. “You are devoted to saving your family, that is a far more worthy cause than my irrational belief that I could end a sport my mother loved. I was trying to change my past, which makes no sense, while you…you were attempting to make a better future for yourself and so many others.”

“You cannot say that all you do is for the past,” he countered.

“Yes, I can, and no matter what I do, I cannot bring her back. I am only pushing those who love me away.” She shook her head, remembering the look of utter disbelief and injury on her father’s face. “I was—am—selfish.”

Her voice trembled, and Patience hated herself for it.

She was the coward. She was the one who couldn’t accept her past and move on.

“I gave you no option but to lie,” she sighed, focusing her stare on the ground between them. “I foolishly believed that my need to educate fighters about pugilism was a worthier pursuit than your mission to save your family and estate. You must think me a silly half-wit.”

“No.” He pulled his hand free from hers, and Patience wilted. “I think you are brave and overcome with compassion. Not many women would face the wrath and scorn of society for any cause, let alone for a sport so vastly popular.”

“But I persuaded you to agree to my terms.”

“I willingly agreed to your terms merely to keep seeing you,” Sin confessed. “Do not think you put me at a disadvantage. Besides, I broke at least two of them, and you have not collected on the third.”

Patience’s brow furrowed as she thought back to her demands. The first was that he would listen and heed her advice. Sin had certainly broken that rule. He would win his freedom from Holstrom, and they would work together to find a solution that did not end with Sin suffering head injuries. While he’d voiced his agreement for future matches, Sin hadn’t fought any yet. But it would be selfish of her, once again, to beg him to abstain from prizefighting.

The third…the meaning behind his name.

“Sin,” he said, as if reading her thoughts. “My younger sister, Juliette, could not say Sinclair as a babe. Sinbar…Sintar…Sincar. After months of corrections, she settled on Sin.”

“It was not because of your devilishly handsome good looks?” Patience teased.

“You think I am handsome?” he retorted, his eye widening in mock surprise.

She ignored his question but couldn’t hold back her smile. “I am pleased to know it was not given due to an adverse demeanor.”

“A handsome devil with a tendency for wicked behavior.” He rubbed his stubbly chin as a wayward lock of hair hung over one eye.

“I think you would be best described as a seafaring pirate with a delightful demeanor.”

How had he banished her dour mood so readily?

For a brief few minutes, Patience was able to forget about the dire situation awaiting her in the house. Her heart didn’t ache as it had when the rain had pelted her upturned face. She wasn’t dwelling on the thought of never seeing Sin again.

He stood before her, towered over her. And she was content to realize that his presence made her feel safe and cared for. Not overpowered and ignored.

She’d thought Sin had once and for all crushed her hopes for the future and would depart London with a piece of her heart hidden on his person.

Could it be that did not have to be her fate?

“When I told you I pondered offering myself to you in marriage—along with my sizeable dowry—I was gravely serious.” She’d dispelled the light, jesting air that had settled around them; however, Patience could not allow Sin to depart without knowing what her heart held, even if his feelings did not mirror her own.

“You would do that to keep me from fighting?” he asked.

“Partly.” Nothing in her years of getting in the fighting ring or going after the wealthiest, titled men of the peerage to plead her case had prepared her for this moment. She sensed his next question before he spoke the words—and she knew he deserved the truth.

He drew closer to her, his warmth a welcome reprieve from the night. “And the other part?”

“Because I cannot imagine a future without you,” she murmured, embarrassment staining her cheeks. “I know you likely think that just another naïve notion. We have known one another for such a short time, however—”

“I have never thought any such thing.” His hand cupped her cheek, turning her eyes to his, and she swam in their warmth, nestled against the heat of his palm. Unease and anticipation burrowed within her when she saw her own desire and longing reflected in his eyes. “I could not accept your offer, no matter how much I longed to. London is where you belong, while I belong on Brownsea Island, close to my people and the ocean. I cannot ask you to leave your home, just as I know you would never ask me to remain in town.”

“And if I told you there is nothing left for me here?” she challenged.

“I would disagree, vehemently.” His fingers caressed her cheek. “What of your family?”

Patience scoffed. “I love my family, but I have hurt them all with my crusade. My father has lost friends. My siblings…I can only image what my actions have done to them.”

“They love you.”

“As I love them, but even before you arrived, I had set my course on leaving London,” she said. “Perhaps retiring to my father’s country estate.”

“What in heavens would you do there?”

It was the same thing Patience had pondered. “Teach in the village schoolhouse. Mayhap take up tending the garden—my mother loved it so. Or I could learn a new sport. Archery is acceptable for women.”

“And what of marriage?” His eyes narrowed. “And love?”

Patience chuckled. “You know I am not particularly fond of any man who’s made my acquaintance. And love?” Her chest seized. “I shall come to love the country, the villagers, and perhaps a quiet existence. I will take up reading or science.”

“You could do those things anywhere,” Sin mused.

“I suppose I could.” Was he agreeing to her idea of moving to the country, or was he saying she should remain in town? “However, I do know London is not the place I wish to live.”

“Brownsea has gardens and a wonderful village brimming with kind people.”

“Brownsea?” Patience’s heart stopped before stuttering several times. “You cannot mean…”

The words died on her lips. If she said the wrong thing, what would Sin think? However, remaining silent didn’t seem right either.

“Lady Patience Lane.” He paused, clearing his throat, and Patience’s entire body tensed. He hadn’t been about to say what she longed to hear.

A sob threatened to betray her disappointment. Could she survive another parting like the one in Seven Dials? At least she’d been the one to walk away then, and Sin had been made to watch her retreating back. This time, it would be Patience frozen to her spot as Sin walked away and out of her life.

In that moment, Patience understood the pain her father had faced when her mother’s illness had progressed, and she passed away. She wanted to wrap her arms around Sin and hold him so tightly that he would be unable to leave. She would tell him anything, live her life doing his bidding if only he would promise never to leave her. Never to condemn her to a fate similar to her father’s.

An empty shell.

Without thought, Patience grabbed Sin’s shoulders and pulled him toward her at the same time she stood on her tiptoes.

“Sin.” She closed her eyes and pressed her lips to his, silently begging him not to pull away. It was a sensation of new beginnings, of longings always denied. His mouth was tender against hers as the draw to be closer to him, to wrap herself in his warmth, became inescapable. There was no room for doubt or uncertainty.

Her heart soared ever higher when Sin wrapped his arms around her, pulling her so close to his body that her bosom pressed against his chest. The hammering of her heart kept pace with his as their lips melded.

Suddenly, her heart stopped, and her breath hitched. Sin, with her in this moment, was the only thing that mattered to Patience. Not her father, not her past, not the many questions that would follow this moment. None of it held any significance if Sin was not with her.

Patience’s fingers grasped his coat, refusing to allow him to move away.

The feeling inside her…the urgent desire to be close to Sin, would not be fleeting nor diminish with time. Even distance would not lessen her longings.

This was where Patience was meant to be, and it had nothing to do with London or the country or Brownsea.

It wasn’t about a place but a person.

Her mother, Ivory Bess, had been her father’s home…and Sin was hers.

Wherever he was, so would be her heart.

Too soon, Sin pulled back, cupping her face and bringing it close to his as Patience quivered, her legs straining from being on her tiptoes.

“Lady Patience Lane.” This time, he didn’t pause, nor did he look the least bit hesitant. “If the offer stands, I would be honored to take you away from London to Brownsea Island—as my wife and countess.”

“But, I thought”—She sucked in a deep breath—“I thought you said…”

“I said I would never allow you to sacrifice your future to save my estate,” he finished for her. “However, if you shall have me, I have no intention of wedding you for your dowry.”

“It is all I can bring to the union.”

“You could not be more wrong,” he whispered, placing a gentle kiss on her lips. “You will bring hope to Brownsea. You will bring your passion for helping others. And you will bring love.”

Patience’s heart swelled at the mention of love. It was more than she’d ever dared to hope for.

“We shall return to my home and bring with us our love.”

Patience reached forward with trembling fingers and brushed a lock of hair from his face, sweeping it behind his ear. “For your people?”

“Love for each other.”

She’d known since the moment she agreed to return to Southlund’s House—for him—that her heart was no longer her own. But daring to hope that he felt the same was something she hadn’t allowed herself.

“Patience, I love you with a depth I never thought possible. A moment without you by my side would be an eternity of emptiness.”

“I love you, too, Sinclair Chambers.” She uttered his name for the first time, but it wasn’t right. Even St. Seville didn’t fit him properly. “Sin,” she corrected.

Just as her father had fallen in love with a bonny lass from Seven Dials, so had Patience fallen in love with a Corinthian prizefighter. There was a certain poetic note to the entire situation. She was certain they would face their own trials and tribulations, but that was more preferable than a lifetime without Sin.

“St. Seville!” The sudden shout echoed across the garden, startling Patience from Sin’s hold.

They both turned to see Valor leaning so far out Merit’s window he was in jeopardy of falling into the overgrown rose thicket below.

“Whatever are you doing?” Patience shouted back. “Get back inside before you fall out.”

“St. Seville. If you wed Patience, you will have no choice but to give Merit and I entrance to the Wicked Earls’ Club. I will have it added to the betrothal agreement.”

“What in heavens?” Patience turned her questioning stare to Sin.

He only shrugged, pressing his lips to her ear as he whispered, “They helped me back here, so I suppose I—we—owe them a small favor.” He turned and smiled up at her brothers. “I will speak with Coventry and see what I can do.”

“See that you do,” Merit called over Valor’s shoulder.

“I do not think it is a good idea at all, my lord,” Patience mumbled for Sin’s ears alone.

“I have no doubt it is a terrible idea; however, if it is in the betrothal agreement, I will agree to anything to have you.”

“You have already proven that.” Patience laughed, the sound echoing across the garden.

Above them, the window closed, and her brothers disappeared from view, leaving only Sin and Patience—and the growing desire that had blossomed the moment she spotted him bare-chested in her home.

Sin pulled her against him once more, and Patience didn’t stop herself from throwing her arms around his neck.

She wanted this moment to last forever, this glimpse in time with the moon bright above and the air cold on her skin…with the promise of many more kisses to warm her.