I can’t sleep.

I stare at the ceiling, lost in thought. All night, all I’ve been able to think about is him. I relive that scene in the restaurant over and over again. I take it farther in my imagination. Picture him flipping me over on that table and thrusting into me from behind. Or maybe pulling me onto his lap on the booth and fucking me while I ride him, my back arching in pleasure.

But every time I’m about to come in my fantasies, I remember the look in his eyes in the car. Distant and closed-off, as he dismissed me.

Will I see him again?

My phone lies beside my bed, charging. I know I shouldn’t, know it’s weak of me, but I can’t resist. I lean over and pick up the phone. Check the First Time for Sale site.

My eyes widen, and my mouth falls open. My auction has exploded in the last 24 hours. The top bid, which is listed at the top of my inbox, is still Declan’s. But now it’s $500,000.

That cannot be right.

There are a ton of other messages from the other bidders. Strangers. I delete them all without reading them, uninterested. Even though Declan was a stranger a day ago on a weird website. I don’t need any other guys to confuse me. One is enough for now.

A new message pops up, and I’m about to delete it when I recognize the sender. Declan.

Why are you awake? he asks, and I realize the site allows you to see other users online.

My heart beats a little faster, realizing what that means. He was online too. Watching my icon. Waiting for me to log in, maybe?

No use pretending I’m not here. He can see that I am.

Kitty: I can’t sleep.

Declan: Still horny, my little virgin?

My breath catches. For a moment, I stare at that message, knowing it would be a bad idea to reply. But he’s right. I was thinking about him before I logged on, after all…

Kitty: I might be. Someone left me with unfinished business earlier tonight, after all.

Declan: You’re in trouble, Joyce. It sounds like you’re already addicted to me.

Kitty: Me? Who was on this website waiting for me to log in tonight, hmm?

Declan: Touché. I guess we may both be in danger here. Luckily, I like danger.

Kitty: If danger is always as hot as you, I could get used to liking it.

I’m emboldened by the screen between us, the fact that he can’t see me blush as I type that.

He seems to read my mind, figuring out why I’m so flirty online.

Declan: I want to see you.

I’m about to reply that I can’t exactly take a bus over to his place in the middle of the night when he types again.

Declan: Turn on your webcam.

I blink, debating. Then I roll over and pick up my laptop. Set it on the desk, sit before it, and switch it on. I log into First Time for Sale and hit the webcam icon beside Declan’s chat screen.

At first, all I see on the screens is darkness. Then we both to switch on the lights in our respective rooms.

“Hello,” I say, and on his screen, Declan grins. Is it strange that that grin of his, the hungry, focused one, already feels familiar to me?

“Hello my sexy little virgin. Having trouble sleeping?”

“I keep thinking about you. About the restaurant. About…” I trail off, my face flushed.

He lifts his eyebrows knowingly. “About the taste of my cock in your mouth? Or maybe about the way it felt to come for me, spread out on that table…”

My cheeks burn, but I hold his gaze. “All of that. And about how badly I wanted to feel your cock inside me…”

“Patience, you dirty girl. We’ll get there. Soon.” His eyes seem to burn with heat as he promises that. Then, those eyes drop lower, taking in the loose nightgown I wore to bed. “Take that off,” he says.

I glance back at his soft black T-shirt. “You first,” I counter, feeling bolder tonight.

He grins and pulls his shirt off in one easy motion. Drops it beside his chair and lets me drink in his body. He’s lean and strong, his muscles not too pronounced, but visible enough that his strength is clear. It makes me want to run my hands over him even more. Trace those abs and pecs and wrap my hands around his biceps.

“Your turn,” he reminds me, and I lean back in my chair. Pull off my nightgown slowly, shivering in the chilly night air. But it’s worth it for the heat in his eyes as he takes in my bare breasts, my stomach, my body naked before him, except for the thin panties I’m wearing. “Those too,” he adds, glancing downward. I sit up in my chair to wriggle out of them next, and sit before him, fully exposed.

He pulls off his own boxers, and his cock springs free, rock hard again. I love that I have that affect on him, can make him hard even if we aren’t in the same room.

“Touch yourself, Joyce,” Declan says, and I trail my hand down my stomach, my palm flat against my own skin. “Tell me what you think about when you masturbate.” His eyes are hungry, tracing the path of my fingers as I start to touch myself. Parting my pussy and trailing my fingers up my wet slit.

“I think about your head between my legs.” I watch him too. Watch the way he wraps a fist around the base of his cock and tightens his grip, his muscles straining as he slowly begins to stroke up his cock. “I think about your tongue inside my pussy, tasting me.” I circle my finger around my clit, brushing it lightly with my thumb the way he did earlier today. “I think about the way you pushed a finger into me,” I add, sliding my own index finger into my pussy.

“Did it feel good to let someone else take control of your pleasure?” he asks, his hand sliding up and down his cock a little faster now. I watch him pleasuring himself, study the way his hand moves, strong and slow at the same time, a steady rhythm, his thumb curling over the tip of his cock with each measured stroke.

“Fuck yes.” I lock eyes with him, and his mouth parts a little in a wicked grin.

“Did you want me to fuck you today, my little virgin?”

“Yes,” I breathe again, leaning in. “I wish you had fucked me. I wish you had spread me across that table and taken my virginity.”

“Ah, but I don’t want to rush this. Put another finger in your pussy, Joyce,” he commands, and I obey him without thinking. Slide my middle finger into myself as well, my breath speeding up as I fuck myself faster, imagining it’s him. “I want to savor this experience. Take you slowly,” Declan murmurs.

He’s fisting himself faster too, both of us leaning forward toward the cameras, eyes locked greedily on one another’s bodies.

“I want to watch you come for me now,” Declan adds, speeding up his motions. I move with him on instinct, faster, breathing hard. “Come for me, Joyce.”

It doesn’t take long. I’m already close to the edge, and hearing him talk like that sends me over it in no time. I thumb my clit and thrust my fingers into my pussy, once, twice, and on the third time, I reach the edge. Fall over it into my climax, crying out faintly. Through the haze of pleasure, I see Declan on screen gritting his teeth, his eyes locked on mine as he comes too, groaning. His cum squirts over his hand, some of it falling along his bare stomach and abs. He jolts forward with every pulse of cum, and I can’t take my eyes off it. It’s hot as hell to watch him put on a show like this for me, especially while I’m doing the same.

I pull my fingers out of my pussy and do something I’ve never done before. I lift them to my lips and lick them off, one at a time. I taste sweet and salty at once, different from Declan, but not bad. I lock eyes with him as I taste myself, and he groans again, this time from want.

Good to know I’m not the only one feeling tortured by this wait.

“You are the sexiest creature alive.” He leans forward, watching me until I finish and lean back in my chair, grinning. He makes me feel so confident in myself, the way he watches me like that, with unbridled lust. But then his eyes dart to the corner of his screen, and back to mine, a frown touching his lips. “I’m afraid it is well past both of our bedtimes now, Joyce.”

I glance at the clock and startle. More time passed than I thought–it’s already almost 2 in the morning. “Crap, yeah, I need to sleep.”

“I hope you can now.” He winks, and reaches for the mouse, though not before he locks eyes with me one more time. “Sleep well, Joyce. I’ll see you soon.”

“Thanks. You too,” I say. He ends the connection, my screen fades to black, and I’m left blinking in confusion at the silly First Time for Sale website again.

It’s weird–Declan is so sweet, considering his dark, perverse tastes in sex. Deflowering a virgin, bidding on my virginity online… And yet, he takes the time to wish me goodnight and picks me up when I fall.

I retreat to bed, more confused than ever by the sexy, complicated man I’m coming to want more and more every time I talk to him.

It’s been two days since I last saw Declan, but we’ve spent nearly every waking hour of those two days messaging on First Time for Sale. He messages me under the desk from board meetings, asking me what I’m fantasizing about. I write to him while I’m supposed to be at my desk working, asking what he’d like to do to me right now if he were here in my office.

I can’t count the number of times I’ve had to sneak into the ladies’ bathroom at work, shut the stall door and masturbate, picturing Declan on his knees in front of me. I know I should slow down; I know that when Declan warned me that I’d get addicted to him, this is exactly what he meant. This road could end terribly for me, in a million different ways. He could lose interest, drop off the face of the earth. He could just want me so he can deflower me, and then he could vanish without ever talking to me again, leaving me hooked, desperate for more and unable to get it.

He could lose the auction. I don’t know what he’d do then. What I’d do.

I’ve read up more on the website, between our conversations. The rules section actually made me feel a lot better. All of this is completely voluntary–I can end the auction anytime I want if I feel uncomfortable. The only thing that will happen to me if I don’t go through with this is that the website won’t release the funds to me.

But I was never in this for the money. I still don’t really believe it’s real, that anyone would pay that much money just for one night with me. And besides, no amount of money could make me do something I really didn’t want to do, especially not something like this.

But if it’s Declan who wins…

I shake my head. I don’t know what I’ll do if he does win. Maybe I’ll back out anyway. Maybe I’ll chicken out.

All I know, right now, is that I want him. I want him to win so that he’ll feel like he can finally fuck me. Make all these fantasies we’re sharing into reality.

My phone buzzes, and my face flushes with heat, despite the fact that I’m in the middle of my office, standing next to the coffee machine about to refill my mug.

I’m on a business call, Declan writes, and all I can think about is how I wish you were on your knees in front of my desk right now, with my cock in your throat. I want to watch your eyes when you suck me off. I want to stop you right before I finish. Pull you to your feet, bend you over this desk, and push my cock into your tight, virgin pussy. I want to fuck you until you’re screaming, until you come on my cock again and again, and then I want to come inside you, coat your pussy with my seed…

I shiver, my heart slamming against my ribs, all the blood draining straight to my pussy.

“Morning, Joyce,” my coworker Abbey says brightly as she shoulders past to grab a cup of coffee.

Startled, red-faced, guilty, I shove my phone into my pocket and refill my own mug after her. “Morning,” I call, belatedly, and she smiles at me, though there’s a question on her face. She looks down at the phone in my hand and is definitely suspicious. Dammit. I need to get my head out of the clouds. Focus on right here and now. Not some guy I barely know from a pervy website who I can’t get out of my head.

But when I march back across the office and take my seat, and my phone buzzes again, I can’t resist. I slide it out and tap open his next message, losing myself in his dark desires once more…