I spent the night upset with myself and dreaded walking into the studio the next day after I ran out of the club.

After I ran away from Liam.

I didn’t want to show my face. I should have had more control over myself, over my reactions. That familiar smell shouldn’t have pushed me over the edge like that. It was distressing. I'd spent years trying to get over what had happened. I was over it.

I spent the night upset with myself and vowing to keep it together next time I saw Liam.

My resolve almost went out the window when he walked into the studio.

Liam was wearing a tight, black t-shirt, showing off his inked muscular arms. If I wasn’t mistaken, he was also wearing the faintest hint of eyeliner.

Damn. That man was calling my bluff, wasn’t he?

I stood frozen in the doorway.

Liam was talking with Seth. He didn’t notice me for the first few seconds. He turned his head and caught me staring at him. I thought he would give me a knowing look, the kind that said I’m-hot-and-you-know-it. Instead, his eyes were only filled with concern.

That was almost worse. My bandmates already worried about me too much. I didn’t need the same from Liam.

"Is everyone here?" I asked as I walked in.

"Just missing Gael," Seth said.

"He’s probably still in bed with Jessie,” Nathan smirked. "You took off early. Did you find some man-candy last night?"

My eyes flicked to Liam quickly without input from my brain. The look of concern in his eyes was replaced with a smug tilt of his chin, no doubt thinking that he was the man-candy Nathan was referring to.

"Let’s get started without Gael," I said. "We’ve got to get Liam caught up with our songs. We don’t have time to mess around."

"I agree," Liam said. "If we’re going to be ready in time, we’ll need to use every minute we have."

We had only just begun to set up our instruments when Gael breezed in, looking pleased with himself.

"Sorry I’m late," he said, sounding completely unrepentant. "Jessie and I—"

"Stop," I said. "I don’t need to hear what you and your girlfriend were getting up to this morning."

Gael faked an affronted look. "I would never," he said. "A gentleman doesn't kiss and tell."

"Gentleman?" Nathan looked around the room with an exaggerated swing of his head back and forth. "I don’t see a gentleman around here."

Gael just laughed, slinging his bass guitar strap around his shoulder.

"Let’s start with one of the newer songs," I suggested.

The guys agreed. I shuffled through our folder of sheet music and handed the correct piece to Liam.

"Think you can play this on the fly?" I asked him.

"I’m insulted you would doubt my ability."

When we started playing, Liam was perfectly capable of keeping up with us. He was almost so good I had to wonder if he’d spent some time listening to our newer stuff. But he’d only auditioned less than a week ago. He wouldn’t have had enough time.

Liam really was just that good. As much as I thought I’d personally made a mistake in hiring him, I couldn’t deny that having this man in my band could only benefit us. We played through several songs without a hitch.

Maybe this would be easier than I thought. With Liam’s talent, I had no doubt that we would be ready for our tour on time.

After a few hours, we took a break. I left the rehearsal room to get a bottle of water from the vending machine down the hall. I was halfway there before I noticed Liam following me.

I turned around in the middle of the hallway to confront him.

"If you’re going to try and make me talk about last night…" I began to say.

Liam cut me off with a shake of his head. "If you don’t want to talk about last night, you don’t have to," he said. "I want to suggest an idea for the set list."

"What did you have in mind?" I asked "I've thought hard about our set list and carefully chosen each song."

"What if instead of starting with Kneel Before Us, we start with Nineteen?" he asked.

My shoulders immediately tensed. "We always start with Kneel Before Us."

Liam blinked at my strong reply.

"Any particular reason why?" he asked.

"It’s a fan favorite," I said. "It gets the crowd pumped up."

Liam nodded. "Exactly," he said. "Your fans love the song. It’s one of your earliest hits. That’s why I think it would be a great idea to end with that instead of starting with it. Leave them on a high note, you know?"

I pressed my lips together firmly. It wasn’t an awful suggestion, but something about Liam’s confident tone made me bristle.

"We end with Nineteen because it has that emotional impact," I said.

Liam looked at me skeptically. "Ending with that song is kind of a downer, isn’t it?" he said.

My eyes narrowed at his tone. Liam didn't know anything about that song. He didn't know anything about the meaning behind it, the significance of it.

"I think I know my fans better than you," I said.

"Maybe you’re just too close to it," Liam suggested. "There’s nothing wrong with an outside perspective."

A shivery coil of darkness slowly unfolded in my stomach. Of course I was close to the song. I'd composed it. I'd written it about—

I slammed shut the mental door keeping my memories at bay.

"Why don’t you leave the creative decisions to me?" I said. "I didn’t hire you for your input. I hired you to back me up on guitar. That’s it."

"Are you always this resistant to new ideas?" Liam asked.

"When it comes from people who don’t know anything about my band, yes." I crossed my arms over my chest.

I didn’t know why I was so against the idea of switching songs. There was just something about the way Liam had suggested it. As if he knew more than me.

Maybe he did.

Maybe I was too close to the situation.

But now that my hackles were raised, I wasn’t inclined to listen to him. I was being stubborn, and I knew it, but I couldn’t make myself stop. The idea that someone might know my songs better than me, that he might know my fans better than me, was infuriating. The fact that it came from Liam—someone that I already felt vulnerable around—made it worse.

"We need to get back to rehearsal," I said. "The others must be getting impatient."

"Alright," he said. "I’ll go back to being your silent backup guitarist. No more suggestions from me."

If it had been anyone else, I would have said the tone of his voice was sarcastic. Maybe that was just me projecting. I knew he thought I was being unreasonable.

Some part of me deep down agreed with him, but I’d already let my guard down around this man too many times. If I started giving in to him, even if it was just a song selection idea, I might start to give in in other ways.

I turned on my heel and as I walked back to the rehearsal room.

I felt Liam’s eyes on me the entire way.