CHAPTER ELEVEN
Becca
Zane’s eyes twinkled with a certain charm as he sat across from me in the restaurant he’d chosen, a dark and secluded place lit mostly by candlelight, and despite my best intentions, I felt myself begin to fall for him all over again. It was a slow kind of tumble, nothing like crashing in head first, but I could feel myself falling for Zane Gilford again all the same.
I didn’t mean to, of course, and I silently reminded myself as I looked around the dining room full of candles that I was there for business, not pleasure. I didn’t need to get involved with someone like Zane Gilford. I’d already done that and had my heart broken once.
The problem was the memory of all those nights I waited for him to come back had a hard time against the thought of just how sexy he looked sitting there across from me. When Mandy, the girl at the front desk, told me he’d been nicer to the staff, I felt like maybe I’d had some effect on him, but I couldn’t just allow myself to forget how it had been the first time we were together. I’d ended up with a broken heart, and that wasn’t something a woman just forgot about because a guy looked completely fuckable sitting across from her in a romantic restaurant.
No, I had to remember how important it was to just keep things business related and let that spark of interest die out on its own.
The waiter stopped at our table and looked down at Zane as he cradled a bottle of wine. “Sir, the Riesling you wanted.”
My favorite wine. I couldn’t help but be impressed that he remembered. The waiter poured us each a glass, and Zane held his up to offer a toast. “To the past and the present.”
I looked at him and knew what he was doing. He’d always been so confident, and in our time apart, he hadn’t changed.
“You remembered I liked Riesling. I’m surprised,” I said as I lifted the glass to my lips and tasted the very pale white wine.
“You’re the only person I’ve ever met that preferred German wine. That’s hard to forget,” he said with a smile.
None of that sounded true, but I didn’t answer, in part because I wanted to believe he remembered my favorite type of wine for some sentimental reason and not because he was cocky and arrogant. I wasn’t in the habit of lying to myself, but being around Zane made me think a little white lie about my favorite white wine wasn’t so bad.
By the time the food came, I had drank enough wine to become more talkative, so as we enjoyed our dinner, I explained my ideas for how to let more people know about the inn. “I think when it comes to advertising, we need to focus on promoting the charm of the place. Anyone can promote themselves as a hotel, and there are other bed and breakfasts in the area that do just that. That’s okay, but yours is such a grand old place, and the way it’s situated on the top of the mountain is just breathtaking.”
Zane nodded and smiled. “Sounds good.”
Since he liked what he’d heard so far, I continued. “Some shots of the house with that valley in the background, preferably with some fall foliage, would be amazing. Even summer shots with a nice full and lush grove of trees would be great too. The place appeals to the older crowd but never doubt the buying power of those hipsters I know you have such disdain for. They love old, and they love quaint.” I said, diving right in.
“What makes you think I don’t like the hipsters I see all over this state?” he asked with a chuckle.
“Just the way you said that right there tells me I was right. I know you, Zane. That kind of glomming onto what other people made popular has always bothered you,” I said, sure in my assessment of him.
For all his dislike for the state he currently lived in, he had a healthy streak of New England properness combined with the attitude of old money that ensured he’d dislike hipsters.
Zane nodded, but after a brief smile and a sip of his wine said, “We’ll have plenty of time for that. I’m sure you’re going to do a fantastic job, Becca, but for now, I want to know how life has been in New York. It’s been a long time since we had a chance to talk.”
I shook my head and wagged my finger playfully. “We need to talk about how we’re going to promote the inn. Now to start, we also need some shots of that dining room. I love the pink and red hue to everything that your mother had for so long. It was like Valentine’s Day all year in there. Did you change that, or did she change it?”
He scooped a forkful of sweet potatoes up off his plate and shrugged. “I don’t know. I didn’t change it. Maybe she got sick of one holiday all year long.”
Undaunted by his sudden disinterest, I continued. “The front porch is another gem. With the way it wraps around the entire house and with those adorable rocking chairs guests can sit in and look out at the woods nearby, it’s simply stunning. I saw some kids playing with chalk on the sidewalk the last time I was here. That might be another good focal point. I think the whole appealing to families aspect is always good since sometimes parents can’t just dump the kids somewhere.”
He raised his hand and said, “Becca, if you don’t stop working so hard all the time, you’re going to miss this incredible meal and the great conversation we could be having. Tell me, how’s the city? I miss living in one, and you’re like a window to the outside world for me. I can’t remember the last building I saw that was over five stories. It’s like living in Amish country up here sometimes. The Wi-Fi went out for a few hours at the inn last week, and I swear, I damn near lost my mind.”
I didn’t know if it was the wine or the charm that hung off every word, but I didn’t feel like fighting him, so I answered his question.
“New York is New York. It’s busy, like always. They don’t call it the city that never sleeps for no reason, you know. I own the advertising company now, though, so things have only gotten more hectic since I took over about four years ago.”
His eyes widened as he nodded. “That’s impressive. So you were what, twenty-four when you took over?”
I chuckled. “You know full well how old I am. I was twenty-six, making me thirty now. Things got a lot crazier when I went through my divorce, but everything always works out somehow, right?” I said before taking another sip of wine.
Zane looked at me with a puzzled look on his face. “Divorced? You mean to tell me someone married you and messed it up? What an idiot.”
I silently laughed to myself. Dustin certainly was a clown, but it didn’t feel right to bash him in front of someone else who had never met him. Still, he was on the top of my shit list, and I didn’t feel like complementing him either.
“Yes, Dustin wasn’t exactly the perfect match I thought he was. Far from it, in fact. I think one of the biggest issues was that he didn’t seem to be interested in having kids in the future, and I certainly am. There were other issues, as well. Don’t get me wrong. Divorce was just the best way to go. I don’t mind talking about it, but if you think you can keep getting me off track and off work, you’re crazy.”
Ignoring my attempt to steer him back toward talking about our working relationship, he frowned and said, “I’m sorry to hear you went through that, though. That couldn’t have been much fun.”
“I survived. So did he. Now, about the campaign—”
Zane cut me off before I had a chance to continue telling him my ideas for the inn’s advertising. “I have to say, Becca, I’m very impressed. You own your own agency, and you managed to do it all in one of the toughest cities in the world. That’s nothing to scoff at. Good for you. You deserve every bit of success that comes your way.”
He raised his glass to me. “To all your hard work Becca.”
Flattered, I touched my glass to his and took a drink, but something inside me felt hollow at that moment. It had nothing to do with Zane and everything to do with myself and how I had recently come to see my professional career. I’d become disenchanted with my life, even though I had spent such a long time convincing myself that everything I had was everything I’d wanted.
The townhouse, the career, the business, all of it was supposed to make me happy, but something was missing.
“You know, I thought working to get the brass ring was the important thing in life, but then I got it, and I found it meant there was always another ring right ahead. Not that it’s a bad thing. I guess I just envy someone like you who gets to live their life in a place like the inn.”
I finished with a small sigh as I glanced out the window at the quiet Vermont town around us before looking back at Zane as he shook his head.
“It’s not everything it’s cracked up to be. I’d give anything to be able to leave it all behind and head to the city where there are people doing things, creating things, and living lives that don’t revolve around what season it is and what color the dining room should be decorated in.”
“You have no idea how wonderful it looks to me. You get to run your own business and get to live outside the rat race. It sounds like the perfect combination to me.”
He sat quietly for a few moments as we continued to eat our food before saying, “Well, tell me more about you, Becca. I want to know what goes on inside your head. You always had the most interesting thoughts of anyone I’ve ever met.”
I shook my head and rolled my eyes. He was really laying it on thick, and it was starting to become more and more obvious that he considered our dinner a date, even though I considered it work. That’s how it needed to be. It was one thing to get involved with a client, but a whole other thing to get involved with one who had already proven himself to be someone who could hurt me.
“Not now, Zane. We need to get back to focusing on the inn. That is why I’m here, remember? I really think focusing on the rustic charm of The Gilford House Inn is your best bet. That’s why people come and why they keep coming back.”
“Becca, come on. We can talk about that later,” he said with a wink. “Right now, I’m far more interested in you.”
It wasn’t as though I disliked being flirted with. Far from it. But his behavior was starting to get in the way of my work, and that simply wasn’t something I would tolerate. That wink and the charming way he looked at me brought the memory of us together and the breakup rushing back to me, and I knew I had to stop him.
“Let me help you out, Zane. We did this once, and it didn’t work out, so let’s just keep this professional, and I think both of us will be much happier. Now, once again, I can really do a lot for the inn if given the opportunity, but you better be ready for record turnouts this coming summer season. I also think we should make a big push for your Christmas season as well. A whole line of promotion designed specifically to bring up the Christmas cheer of an inn tucked away in the cozy and snowy mountains of Vermont? It practically writes itself,” I said, rattling off all the ideas I had formed on the drive up from the city and ignoring Zane when he tried to interrupt and interject with anything that wasn’t work-related, which of course was all he wanted to do.
Finally, I had gotten through all of my ideas and took a deep breath before finishing up with, “Of course, I’ll wait for your word on all of these things. You’ll be in charge of final approval for any and all projects we work on related to the inn. I won’t begin anything without your signed approval.”
“Sounds great,” he said, finishing the last of his meal and wine. “Now, let’s get back to us.”
I sighed and leaned back in my chair. The man was incorrigible, just like he’d always been, and I began to think nothing I said or did would stop him from coming after me, so I needed to give it to him straight.
“Zane,” I said, taking a long drink and finishing off my own wine while he sat waiting for me to respond, staring at me with those deep brown eyes of his. “There is no us. I can’t make that any clearer for you. I don’t want to be overly harsh since I can see that you’re really making an effort to be charming and sweet, but there isn’t any us, and we need to get back to focusing on the task at hand, which is your inn.”
I set my hands on my lap and waited for him to respond, silently swearing to myself that I was going to stand my ground. I never had with Zane Gilford on any other occasion, so this would be a first.
But an important first.
He smiled and leaned in a little closer. “But there can be, Becca. I’m not the person you knew before. Let me prove that to you. Let me show you that I’m not just some spoiled little boy. I know we got off on the wrong foot when you stayed here last month, but you caught me at a weird time in my life.”
“And I am not as naïve as I used to be, Zane. Trust me on that. It’s much better for both of us that we just keep things professional.”
The look of confusion on Zane’s face was almost comical as he answered, “I should remind you, Becca, I’m not the type of man who gives up when he finds what he wants. You know that from the first time we got together.”
I let out a laugh as I pretended not to remember how insistently he pursued me when we first met. “Thanks for the warning.”
The whole ride back to the inn, I tried to get him to focus on what the advertising campaign I had planned would look like, and he tried to get me to forget work and focus on what it would be like if we got together again. We were both stubborn people, so neither one of us intended to give in to the other person.
He stopped the car and turned it off before shifting in his seat to face me. “What do you say to the two of us having a drink in my room?”
God, he was persistent! I had to give him that, but I had no intention of giving him anything else.
“Thank you for dinner, Zane. It was wonderful. I’m going to go to my room now and write up some more ideas I just thought of for the campaign. Do you want to meet again tomorrow around lunch to discuss everything?”
His mouth slowly inched up into a smile. “I like the idea of breakfast better. We can have it brought to my room and discuss things in bed.”
“You never quit, do you?”
Shaking his head, he slid his tongue across his bottom lip. “No.”
“No wonder your mother left the inn to you. She must have known your persistent streak would ensure the place continued to do well.”
His expression screwed into a grimace at my mention of the inn, but I didn’t give him a chance to reply before I opened the car door. “Thanks for a great dinner! See you for lunch tomorrow! You’re going to love the ideas I have for you.”
And with that, I left Zane sitting in his car wanting something I wouldn’t give him. Not that part of me didn’t want to. As much as my brain remembered what being with him felt like, my body remembered too and wished my heart would get on board so all of me could enjoy him again.
I closed the door to my room and took a deep breath. I’d successfully fended off Zane Gilford, and as I congratulated myself, I remembered all the reasons why it would be harder and harder each time to deny what my body already knew.