chapter 1
8 years ago…
Rafael DeMarco leaned over the table, his eyes scanning a digital replica of the city of New York. The digital map carried numerous x marks all over. X marks the spot, Rafe thought. How morbid that each of those marks represented a life. Someone with children, with hopes and dreams. Someone whose days were numbered.
Dead men walking.
Rafe pointed at the X mark currently under discussion. “This isn’t a one man job. Plus, the location is a risk. There will be too many civilians around at that time. I think we should wait until we have more intel or more direct access to the target.” They rarely ever did one-man jobs. The standard rule was two. It built in redundancy.
The head of ORUS, the shadow organization that had nurtured and trained him, narrowed his eyes. He hadn’t changed much over the years, with the same obsidian black hair and dark eyes, but then again he’d already looked like he’d survived a million battles when Rafe had first met him. Harsh and incredibly arrogant, Orion had never been a patient man, but he was usually open to input from his most trusted operatives.
Apparently not today.
“The op is a go. This isn’t a negotiation.”
Rafe remained silent even while he seethed internally. For years he’d bitten his tongue and taken orders like a good soldier, all for the greater good.
The lies upon lies were eating away at him. Especially considering his two bosses; Orion on one end and the FBI on the other. Granted, Orion didn’t know about the FBI, otherwise, Rafe would have been fitted for a lovely casket years ago.
He was so tired of hearing that he was almost done, that he’d soon be free to pursue his own life. Lately those promises rung hollow as he lost more and more of his soul with every life taken. Every order that came in chipped away at him. Especially the ones he could do nothing about. He wasn’t sure how much more he could take.
Most of his missions were sanctioned government hits. When some branch of the government couldn’t do things the easy way, ORUS was called in to do things the messy and silent way.
The Feds had placed him undercover in ORUS because they suspected Orion was taking jobs on the side. And they were right. The ones Rafe could impact, he did. The others…those were the ones that chipped away at him. This particular job was one of those pesky non-sanctioned ones.
He had a vested interest in keeping ORUS away from that house. The house belonged to a drug lord responsible for most of the cocaine distribution on the East Coast. The Del Tinos. The FBI had a man inside who had risen to the rank of lieutenant. Rafe had a sick feeling that he might get hit in the melee and he needed to do what he could to prevent that.
“You ask me for my opinion because you trust my experience. My experience and training tells me this operation is a clusterfuck waiting to happen.”
Orion’s lips narrowed into a thin, cruel line but his dark eyes concentrated on the schematics of the house that were displayed on the upper right corner of the table. The Del Tinos were the scum of the earth. They peddled that shit on the streets of his city while the head of the cartel languished in his luxurious Hamptons mansion every night. Taking him out would do the world some good. But every cell in Rafe’s body said he was not the target.
Someone had likely risked their life to get those schematics to that house. When ORUS planned your downfall, there was nowhere to hide. He glanced over at Orion. Rafe could almost see the wheels spinning in that calculating mind, looking for pitfalls and weighing them against the potential benefits of a successful op.
The problem was that Orion valued a successful op over most anything else, including the lives of his agents. The bastard would think nothing of ordering any of them, even Rafe, to his death if he thought there was something ORUS would gain by it. They were supposed to be taking orders directly from the government but Orion didn’t take orders from anyone.
Then again you didn’t get to a position like Orion’s by being warm and trusting. Or by being a fool. Rafe would have to tread lightly going forward.
“I understand your concerns, Libra.” Orion said, referring to him by his codename. “We’ve taken the difficulties you mentioned into account.”
“Excellent. If there’s nothing else, then I’ll see you next week.” He stood. He needed to get word to his handler to get their man out.
Orion nodded briskly and turned back to the table. Rafe didn’t waste any time getting the hell out of there. He’d just about hit his asshole tolerance for the day. Before he got to the street, he pulled a black skull cap from his pocket and tugged it over his hair. Although he was certain no one had followed him here, it was second nature to protect his identity. He couldn’t even blame ORUS for his distrustful nature; that was a by-product of growing up in Brooklyn. He’d learned early that the only one you could trust was yourself and it was better to never be seen or heard in case someone decided to try to pin their crimes on you.
A half hour later, he walked through the door of the brownstone where his grandmother had raised him and his sister. Voices and laughter filtered through from the back of the house and Rafe paused, allowing the warmth and comfort of the sound to flow over him. Before he approached his loved ones, he liked to let the stench of his association with Orion roll off him. He was a man with many different layers, but he never wanted the different sides of his life to touch. His family deserved better than that.
There was noise and before Rafe could categorize it, his arms were full of giggly girl and he had a face full of his baby sister’s wild, curly hair.
“Whoa, you’re getting stronger Lulu. I can barely breathe.”
He made an exaggerated choking sound, and Lucia relaxed her stranglehold on his neck. He set her on her feet gently and smiled as she tried to push her hair behind her ears. Finally she gave up and grabbed his hand.
“What are you doing out here? We’re already eating but we’re still on the antipasti. Come on!”
He allowed her to drag him through the living room and into the dining room where he was greeted by a chorus of hellos and slaps on the back. A few minutes later, Nonna handed him a plate filled with all the things he loved, tomato slices, mozzarella and a heap of prosciutto. Lucia kissed his cheek and then sat back down in her usual seat and started talking to her friend Jessica.
“Hey, I’ve been meaning to ask you about Lucia’s birthday.”
He glanced over at his friend and mentee, Noah Blake, before checking to make sure Lucia wasn’t listening in. Everyone else was busy eating and talking so no one paid them any attention. Rafe was planning a party for Lucia’s fifteenth birthday and was determined to actually surprise her for once.
“Do you know what music she’s into lately? I wanted to get her something more personal than a gift card, you know?”
Rafe smiled. “She’s into one of those boy bands. Honestly you could probably just guess, and even if you got it wrong she’d still love it.”
Lucia was a sweetheart, despite losing their parents young and having only him as a father figure. Rafe sighed. He’d been fifteen when his parents died in the car accident. Young, but he’d had the benefit of a strong father growing up who’d made sure he understood what was important in life. Family. Honor. Self-respect. He’d tried to help Nonna instill those same virtues in Lucia, but he was pretty sure her sweetness wasn’t due to his efforts. She’d always been a sweet kid.
“Everything okay?” Noah asked.
The kid was mature for his age but definitely looked every bit of the five years younger he was than Rafe. He was still growing into his large hands and feet, so he’d probably end up as tall as Rafe, easily a few inches over six feet when it was all said and done.
“Fine. Just had to meet with the top dog.”
He didn’t have to explain further. Noah would instantly know who he was talking about.
“You should have brought me with you,” Noah mumbled.
Rafe acknowledged the comment with a grunt but didn’t bother responding. The kid had been asking for more responsibility lately, wanting to be more involved in the planning and research phases instead of just the execution.
Rafe had always been able to put him off so far, but he wasn’t sure how much longer that would work. There were so many things he wished he could tell him, so many times he’d wondered what would have happened if he’d never been introduced to a young apprentice looking for guidance. But if the kid hadn’t been brought to Rafe to train, he would have just ended up with someone else or in jail. At least Rafe had the ability to try to instill some values and honor into him, or at least he hoped he had.
“I don’t leave you behind because I don’t think you can handle it. I leave you behind because I want more for you than this.”
Noah’s scowl relaxed slightly. “We’re doing good. What’s better than that?”
Rafe buried his instinct to tell him the truth. It killed him sometimes, his double life that required him to constantly mislead, omit or deceive. He wished sometimes that he could go back in time and change everything. Then he wouldn’t have to hide who he was, and more importantly, he wouldn’t have to wonder every day when his decisions would blow back and hurt the ones he loved most.
“One day you’ll understand. I promise. But for now, I’d rather have you here with them.”
Noah looked down the table to where Nonna and Lucia were. Rafe wasn’t sure if the kid understood how much trust it took for Rafe to leave someone else watching over his family.
“You’re the only one I trust to take care of them.”
Noah seemed to understand the importance of the statement. He nodded once and looked Rafe directly in the eye. He only knew the bare bones of where Noah had come from, that he’d been bounced between a bunch of foster homes before ending up on the streets. But Rafe knew when a man was worth his word, and Noah looked like he’d just accepted a blood vow.
“I’ll always take care of them. Not just because they’re your family. But because they’re mine too.”