By the time I’d recovered from being caught naked with Joe, I was dressed and buckled into Dean’s rental car like a child. And I was livid.

Most of the crew had already headed back for home. Only Ryan and Jackie had come along with Dean. We’d left them behind as my brother had hustled me into the car.

“You’re treating me like a child… and you’re not listening,” I argued. “He didn’t take me with him, I went on my own. And when that storm hit, he was the one who got us all to safety. He could have been killed, but he took care of us all. You wanted him to protect me… and he did.”

“I wanted him to keep his goddamned hands off my sister,” Dean shot back as he drove. “He’s a decade older than you are, Maggie. He’s got a whole lifetime of experience on you.” He snorted derisively. “You’re a kid out of college.

Did he offer to fund the foundation?” he asked.

“He’s mentioned it…,” I replied.

“And he doesn’t like the risks you take by heading up operations like this yourself?”

“He understands how important my work is,” I shot back. “He loves me…”

“He’s trying to control you, Maggie, and you don’t even see it. I’ve watched him with women for a lot of years. He doesn’t bend to them, honey. They bend to him. He’s lived for TexStar since he graduated college. That’s where his drive is… that’s where his real passion lies.”

I shifted uncomfortably in my seat and looked out the window. Everything about this was wrong. I should have been driving back home with Joe. But I was here listening to this…

“He’ll control your foundation, Mags,” Dean said more gently. “And he’ll control you, too. I trusted him not to cross the line with you… and he did it anyway. I don’t want you to be hurt, honey… and I think it’s already too late. He’s got you convinced that he loves you… but it’s just sex. You’re looking at him as some kind of hero… but he’s never stayed with any woman, Maggie. He’s left every one… That grandmother of his would take his company away before she’d allow him to permanently link their family to ours. We were always the charity kids.” He glanced at me. “If it comes down to a choice… you know where he’ll land.

You can’t really believe he’d give it all up for you…?”

* * *

We made the rest of the trip in silence. I was too tired to argue any longer. Deep in my heart, I knew he was wrong. He had to be. It was Dean who was seeing the circumstances through the eyes of a child. He couldn’t see me as an adult… and he refused to see that people might grow and change over the years.

We reached the cottage long after nightfall. Dean stretched out on the couch, refusing to leave me alone. I closed the bedroom door on him and collapsed in utter exhaustion. I needed a shower, but I settled for stripping off my filthy clothes and splashing water on my face. I climbed into bed and could smell the blend of Joe’s body and mine. What if Dean is right? My conscience whispered. What if none of it is real?

I was worn too thin, in body and spirit, to fight off the wave of fear that washed over me. In the darkness, it grew like the childhood monster… hiding in the closet…

If Joe had been beside me, I could have leaned on his strength, borrowed his courage. But as tired as I was, sleep wouldn’t come. The years of our history flew past in my mind. Joe and I had spent so many years apart… And as close as we’d gotten since I’d been home, Dean was the one who had been his friend… and at his side for the last four years…

Nothing in my gut told me Joe was that guy. The one who can’t resist taking what a girl shows up offering…

But I’d thrown myself at him. Pretty shamelessly, as I remembered. I felt my cheeks burn with the memory. I’d fallen in love with the man I’d remembered… how could I be sure I even knew the man he was today? I’d been a virgin, throwing myself into the arms of a memory. It had happened so fast, and I’d been so sure he would feel the same… Who could blame him for responding and giving me what I’d begged him for…? Jackie’s crude words of wisdom came back, ringing in my ears… Their brains and their dicks often don’t share clear lines of communication…

We’d been caught together in the most extraordinary circumstances. It would hardly be the first time love and desire had tangled in a snarl of confusion. Maybe what we shared was just the kind of thing that happens between two people, under desperate circumstances…

I turned over and buried my face in the hot pillow. My heart was screaming to be heard, telling me all my fears were wrong. But the truth was, my fears were growing… I’d never had a real relationship with a man before… any man…

How could I possibly know for sure… what was truly real?