Chapter 51
Reese
I roll over in bed and Leo’s spot is cold. Panicked, I bolt upright in bed.
Whenever he’s missing from bed at this hour, it means he’s spent the better part of the night having nightmares until they finally chased him out of bed and into the shadows of the back porch.
My chest tightens as I pull a sweatshirt over my head. It’s been a few months since he had one of those night terrors. He’s been so much better since he and Brent moved in with me. I thought that he’d finally shrugged himself from the ugly grips of the disorder. I thought that we’d beat it. But PTSD isn’t something that ever really goes away.
It’s managed. It’s dealt with.
It weaves and wanes and sometimes it fades until you can barely see the stains but it’s always there.
I hate feeling so powerless. I hate that it’s something that I can’t fix. All I can do is support him, throw my arms around him. And that’s what I’m going to do right now.
I tiptoe past Brent’s room and down the stairs. I step into Leo’s big shoes on the mat and slide the back door open.
There he is.
His shoulders are as wide as ever. I can’t help but admire his powerful body as I approach him from behind. He glances up at me over his back and grins.
“Hey.” I lower myself to the spot beside him and run my hand across his back.
“Hey.” He stretches his hand out to me, offering me a sip from his juice box. Long gone are the days of drinking whiskey from a red plastic cup. Apple-grape fruit punch is his drink of choice these days.
I giggle, leaning in to suck on the plastic straw.
Lust and adoration fill his eyes as he watches me drink. “What are you doing out here?” I ask softly as I run my hand tenderly over his knee. “Nightmares?” It’s fall now. It’s cold. I wish he wouldn’t sit out here.
He looks up at the sky and smiles on a deep exhale. “Not nightmares. Good dreams. Happy ones.”
Pleasantly surprised by his answer, my lips inch up, too. “About what?” I lean my head on his shoulder and his arm comes around me.
“About us. About our family and what’s next for us.”
“Really?”
He nods and kisses my forehead. “Really.”
My heart does all kinds of twists and flips in my chest. I’m so in love with Leo and Brent and the life we have together and the thought of what the future holds tickles the pit of my stomach.
I look down at his hand and realize that he’s flipping something around between his fingers. Before I can make out what it is, Leo angles himself toward me and pushes me back softly by the shoulders. “Is it crazy that I want to marry you, Reese? I mean, I really want to marry you. Now.”
My breath gets caught in my throat and my pulse goes erratic. We’ve talked about marriage and babies. Only in vague terms. This is the first time he’s mentioned it in a direct way. That look of determination in his eyes is nerve-wracking. My heart feels like it’ll pound right out of my chest.
He sinks to the bottom step, stooping on one knee. The diamond on the thin band between his fingers catches the moonlight and glimmers. “I was gonna wait to ask you…Y’know, so Brent and your family could be here to witness it…But I don’t wanna wait any more. Marry me, Reese. Be my wife. Please. I don’t deserve you. But I want you. Forever.”
“Oh my god, Leo.” Tears spill readily down my cheeks. “I want you to be my husband. Yes, I’ll marry you.”
His giddy smile is brighter than all the stars in the sky. He does a corny fist pump that makes me laugh. “Yes!” He grabs my left hand and slips the ring on. It fits like it was made just for me. It’s beautiful. Perfect.
Orgasm Man. My very own superhero. My lover. My best friend.
I grab his fingers and lift his hand to my mouth. I press my lips to the skin grafts on his knuckles. The burns and scars he got while he was saving my life.
“I love you, Leo. I won’t ever stop.”
“I love you, too, Cupcake Girl. Forever isn’t nearly enough for us.”