Climbing into the waiting carriage, Tabbie and Tricia rode back to Tabbie’s townhome in silence. Tabbie informed the driver to return as quickly as possible for Luke and Ryker. Tricia didn’t cry, though part of her wanted to. She had told herself it was to be expected. She’d made her choices and she wouldn’t regret them. But their looks had been terrible and, if she were honest, she’d expected to be ruined more quietly. With a gossip column or, perhaps, a ladies’ tea. But to be called out at a crowded ball was so much worse than she’d ever imagined.

At least she’d made arrangements to stay at Tabbie’s so that she wouldn’t have to tell her mother for another day. Her father’s condition had stabilized at least, the only reason she’d been comfortable enough to agree to this entire ordeal.

She wished Ryker had been there. He would have known how to help her.

Ryker.

Tabbie had thought he might ask her to marry him. That was out of the question now. A duke did not marry a fallen woman.

She tried to tell herself that this was what she had wanted before him. At the very least expected. But somehow she hadn’t realized how much Ryker meant to her until she knew she couldn’t have him. A future that allowed her both a family and a meaningful life of charity work. She should have known better. Those futures were only for women who sparkled the way her sister did.

She climbed the stairs with a mumbled goodnight to Tabbie.

“Tricia,” her sister called. “Try not to worry. We’ll have this all sorted by the morning.”

She gave a silent nod as she turned and finished climbing the stairs. Dismissing her maid, she undressed herself, and then looked in the mirror. This was the face of a spinster. A ruined spinster.

But then a new thought occurred to her. If she were to live the life of a ruined woman, shouldn’t she actually be thoroughly and completely ruined? A little thrill raced up her spine. She wanted all of him but she’d settle for his touch, a few stolen moments to last a lifetime.

Why not experience passion once before she dedicated herself to charity? She climbed into bed but her mind simply wouldn’t quiet, thoughts swirling at a frantic pace.

Memories of Herman’s words and the looks and snickers of the crowd filled her with shame. While thoughts of Ryker and the comfort his touch would provide heated her skin.

Slipping back out of bed, she began pulling on more serviceable clothing. Sneaking down the hall, she used the servants’ stairs. Silently, she crept past the kitchen and then slipped out the back door. With any luck, Ryker had yet to arrive home.

She moved in the shadows down the dark streets, the night air filling her lungs and calming her soul.

She knew where Ryker lived, it wasn’t far from Tabbie’s home. The night was quiet and not too cold so she hid herself away near his front door. Saying a silent prayer he hadn’t already arrived home and was safely tucked inside, she settled in to wait.

It was nearly an hour later when the rumbling of wagon wheels caught her notice. She craned her neck up over the shrub she hid behind to see the outline of Luke’s carriage rumbling toward them.

It stopped by the door and Ryker’s voice reverberated through her chest. “Send me word, if you wouldn’t mind, to let me know that they’ve made it safely home.”

“Of course,” Luke’s words more muffled in the carriage but she could still make them out. “The driver said he delivered them, so I am sure they are fine.”

The door snapped closed again as the wheels began to move. She could hear Ryker’s feet on the cobblestones as he made his way up the steps. “Ryker,” she whispered, standing up.

He startled and his hand reached into his coat before his eyes registered her. “Bloody hell, Tricia. What are you doing?”

Skirting around the bush, she made her way up the steps to join him. “Coming to see you, of course.”

His arm reached out to wrap around her waist and then he pulled her tight against him. “I was worried when you left the ball.”

“Oh…that…it couldn’t be helped.” She swallowed a lump in her throat, not wanting to discuss it. It was the very thing she came here to forget. He’d find out eventually, she was sure, but tonight was just about the two of them. She didn’t want Herman ruining that too.

His lips grazed her forehead. “Are you going to tell me what happened?”

“I’d rather not,” she leaned back to look up at him then.

His eyebrows shot up. “You are never dull, I’ll say that.” He paused searching her face. “If not to tell me what happened, why did you come?”

Nibbling on her lip, she searched for the words that might tell him, she wanted him to ruin her without actually saying it out loud. Drat, why hadn’t she practiced this beforehand? “Perhaps we could discuss it inside?”

He paused for a long moment before finally answering. “You’re just going to enter my house in the middle of the night, through the front door?”

Shrugging, she looked away then. “I no longer need to preserve my reputation.”

“I see,” he answered evenly before he guided her to the entrance with an arm around her waist.

Stepping inside, he waved away the staff that made to greet him. With his arm still around her waist, he turned to the right and entered what appeared to be a sitting room.

He lit a candle, sitting it on the nearest table, and led her to a settee. “What happened, Tricia?” he asked as he sat down, pulling her with him.

“I don’t…that is to say…that’s not what I came for.” She turned toward him then.

She heard him give a short sigh. “Well, it’s what I want to know.”

Swallowing, she shook her head. She didn’t want to talk. Summoning her courage, her tongue darted out to wet her lips. His gaze fell to her lips, his eyes following the trail of her tongue. Pushing all thought aside, she leaned in and placed her lips on his. He didn’t move and for a moment she wondered what to do but then her body took over. Remembering his kiss in the garden, she pulled back slightly and then kissed him again and again, until his lips responded. She barely had time to register his response when he’d pulled her into his lap, her body pressed to his, his hand in her hair as his tongue ravaged her mouth in the most delightful way.

This is what she had wanted. To lose herself in his strength, his passion. It was exciting and comforting all in the same moment.

His other hand slid down her body, cupping her behind. The press of it felt so delightful, she moaned into his lips without intending to.

He gave a growl of response. “What are you doing to me, Tricia?”

She wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling them closer together. She didn’t want to talk, only to feel. To forget.

He slipped his hand out of her hair and brought it to her cheek. As he did so, his thumb brushed something warm and wet. He pulled back at the same time she realized she was crying.

“Sweetheart,” he murmured then, giving her another very soft kiss. “Tell me.”

It was only then that she managed to tell him the story. Sitting in his lap, wrapped in his embrace. Herman’s words, the looks of the crowd. “I know I deserved it, Ryker,” she choked out. “I knew what I was doing but I didn’t expect it to hurt so much.”

“I know what you deserve and it wasn’t that.” He wiped her tears again.

“I’ll be better tomorrow,” she whispered. “I always knew I’d be a spinster but it was so much harder than I thought it would be. I’m sorry to bother you like this. I guess I thought…” She trailed off because the words made her sound like a harlot.

“What did you think?” He stilled under her, his thumb no longer stroking her cheek or wiping her tears.

“I thought…” She was glad for the dim light, it hid her blush. “That being near you would make me feel better. And that if I were to be ruined anyhow…” She gulped as she went to say the next words. “I may as well actually be ruined.”

She heard him suck in his breath and for a moment there was no sound at all. Then, without warning he let out a choked laugh that startled her near to death. She made to scramble off his lap but his laughter abruptly ended and he pulled her back down against him. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. I didn’t mean to laugh.”

“Then why did you,” she huffed.

His thumb came to her cheek again, his palm cradling her head. “It’s just that every other lady I’ve ever been acquainted with would have used this meeting, and our prior ones, to ensure her own future by demanding we wed.” He paused to give her a small kiss. “Had that even occurred to you?”

A blush again rose in her cheeks. Not only was she a wanton woman, apparently she was a dimwitted one at that. “Should it have?”

“I’m glad it didn’t,” he whispered. “It’s the very reason we will, in fact, be wed. Even though you are heaps of trouble. Sneaking out, causing scandals at balls.” Then he kissed her again, a deep, hard kiss that left her mind spinning. She barely processed his words as they pressed together. But slowly, they cut through the haze that seemed to penetrate her thoughts whenever he touched her.

“Married?” she whispered then, pulling back. “You want to marry me?”

He quirked a brow as he gave her lopsided grin. My lord, he made a woman breathless like that. “I do.”

She blinked several times. “But you don’t want to get married. You said so the first night I met you.”

“Marriage is required of me.” His hand trailed up her back in a slow, light caress. And while the touch spoke of affection, the words left her rather cold. “And while I intended to wait, I doubt I will find another woman quite like you.”

Well that warmed her. It was a declaration of affection at the very least.

But he wasn’t finished. “And our match could be mutually beneficial.”

“How so?” she asked as his lips brushed hers once more. Which wasn’t entirely fair. How was she to make a wise decision with him touching her like this?

“I require an heir. You would like to do charity work. If you might agree to helping me fulfill my ducal obligations, I’ll aid you in your societal ones.”

“How many?” She pulled away then wanting to see his face. His words made complete sense but her heart wanted something more. She had been content not to marry, but here in his arms it sounded better and better. Though not if it was only an arrangement of convenience for him. Somehow that seemed worse than being a fallen spinster.

“Orphanages? As many as you desire.” He searched her face, still holding her close. His words did ease her sudden fears. At least, if she agreed to this, she’d still be able to help society. Because part of her wanted to say yes. Desperately wanted to say yes.

“Children,” she corrected. His offer was so sterile, despite their current seating arrangement, that she felt the need to clarify. What if, after one child, they became a business partnership? The idea filled her with absolute dread.

But there was nothing sterile about his gaze as he answered her. It was hot and wanton and it made her fears ease considerably. “Also as many as you desire. Though I must insist on two at least.”

Before she could answer, a banging noise erupted from the foyer. It startled Tricia so that she nearly jumped from his lap. But he held her tight. “Someone is knocking on the door.”

“At this hour?” she asked incredulously. She wondered whom it might be but it didn’t take long before she had her answer.

“Open up, Landon,” Luke’s voice called clearly through the door. “I know she is in there.”

“Oh no,” Tricia gasped. Apparently today she couldn’t get away with anything.

“Oh yes,” Ryker winked at her. Then he called out, “Let him in.”