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Never and Always by Khardine Gray (8)

Chapter 8

She just didn’t understand it, and now she was beginning to wonder if she’d done something wrong.

Two weeks had passed since that night Nick came to her rescue at the motel. Since then he was different.

Mia couldn’t explain it, and she didn’t understand. It made her feel foolish for thinking that something had changed between them and there was a connection. But…she’d felt it. She was sure that she felt it.

He didn’t even hang out with her anymore. Not even in the general sense, like having breakfast together or sitting around snacking while they watched a film. And he was always out. Always busy. She knew he was working on their case, but so were the police.

How busy could he be that he didn’t have five minutes to spend with her? She really didn’t want to think he was avoiding her, but she couldn’t help it. And of course if he was avoiding her then the next question was why.

Why would Nick be avoiding her?

It was bad enough to be here with Glenn, who still wasn’t talking to her, but she thought she’d have Nick.

The uncertainty and discomfort was starting to get on her nerves and she knew there was only a matter of time before it became too much again. At least her parents had softened up a little and gave her some money to keep her going. But it came with a caution, and a lecture she really didn’t need.

She knew she’d probably been far too frivolous in the past in their eyes, but she’d more than taken her business seriously and had every intention of rising from the ashes.

Maybe she’d go somewhere else besides Florida, as it had too many painful memories with all that had happened. Rebuilding was definitely on her to-do list, though.

For now she’d get a job, and she had three interviews lined up at beauty clinics across town.

The clinic that was closest to her was what caught her eye, not just for its proximity, but because it was more in line with her own business in Florida, and it didn’t hurt that the pay was slightly more. They seemed keen on her when she spoke to them, too, and explained that she’d had her own business. She didn’t ever like to sound too full of herself, but she knew when it came to beauty therapy she was in her element. It was her thing that she would take pride in and she was determined to take back all that Alan took from her.

Job hunting had provided a much needed distraction from the two men in her life that were seriously getting under her skin.

But she took a little break today when Claire came by in the afternoon. She came bearing gifts from Spain. She brought perfume, a beautiful pink fan with Flamenco dancers on it, and tons of chocolate, which they both indulged on while they talked in her room. It was great to see her and Claire’s presence relaxed her.

“I’m terrible. These were all for you,” Claire laughed, shaking her head. Her ponytail bobbled at the impact.

“They taste better when shared. Also, they’re half the calories,” Mia giggled.

“Yes, that is true. We share the calories, of which I don’t need anymore. I had ten-course meals everyday while I was in Spain.” Claire grimaced.

“And yet you didn’t gain a pound.” Mia widened her eyes when she looked at her friend’s tiny frame.

If that had been her she would have had to work out for years to keep the weight off.

“I did, I’m just dressed smartly.”

Mia smirked at Claire.

“I’m going to leave you before I eat anymore. I have a date later with a fireman.” Claire said sliding off the bed. She stood up, and stretched.

“A fireman?” Mia smiled.

“Yup, the dreamy, hunky kind.” Claire nodded, eyes sparkling. “It’s safe to say that I will be having a very good night. But, my dear troubled friend, before I go, I’ll reiterate my words of wisdom.”

“What words of wisdom?” Mia smiled. Claire was always sharing some form of tip.

“Talk to Nick. Worrying gives people wrinkles. You of all people should know that with your beauty knowledge.”

She’d spoken to Claire about Nick. He was on her mind and she’d been eager to talk to someone who was non-judgmental and friendly. For her that would be Claire.

“And say what?” Mia shrugged.

“Say, ‘I like you and it’s time we cross that line.’” Claire nodded as if that was the best idea in the world.

“No, I’m definitely not saying that. That sounds ridiculous.” Mia held her gaze for a few seconds. “Claire, I think I’ve reached the point where I should stop.”

Maybe that was the answer.

Claire lowered her brows and pressed her lips together. “Stop?”

“We’ve been talking about Nick since I was six, maybe before that. But since I can’t remember I’m going with six. I’m thirty years old. Don’t you think if he was that interested he would have shown it already.”

“He does, though?”

Mia inclined her head to the side and gave her a questioning look. “Claire, we both know if you were me, you would have moved on long ago.”

“We’re not talking about me, miss lady, and to be honest if this was me I would have made some kind of move already. Long, long ago.”

“You want me to make a move on my brother’s best friend?”

“Why do you make it sound so weird? Okay, let’s do this. Mia, do you like the guy?”

Oh God. What kind of question was that? It was clear that she always had and never stopped.

“Claire, unfortunately, if I didn’t, we wouldn’t be having the conversation.” Mia shrugged.

“It’s a valid question, Mia. Since you’ve been home we just slipped back into our silly girly habits and that was one of them. Our routine is this: eat tons of chocolate, talk about hair and makeup, what’s on sale at Nordstrom, and then we talk about Nick. Even when you didn’t see him for years he still got a mention. So I’m not asking you if you like him in that casual way you’re used to. I’m asking you to search your feelings and decide if you like him enough to do something about it.”

Oh.

Mia completely understood, and the way Claire explained it was almost a little scary. There was a difference, and that made her search her feelings, indeed.

“Yes.” She said it effortlessly as she gazed ahead to the row of pewter-colored candle sticks by her window. “I do, but it’s weird between us. It’s weird because I feel like there’s that line I shouldn’t cross. Or sometimes the line feels like a wall. I thought we made a connection weeks ago, but then the wall came up.”

Claire offered a sympathetic look. “Aww sweetie. How about you just talk to him. Ask if he wants to hang out. You guys do that so it wouldn’t be weird. Whatever you do, try to find some way of talking to him. I agree that this has been going on forever. What I won’t agree with is worrying and wondering. There’s no point to that.”

Mia had to agree. “Okay, I guess I can do that.”

“I think you need to. Because, my dear friend, it sounds like you’re feeling a tad more than attraction for our gorgeous Nick.”

Mia tried to laugh that off and make it sound like what Claire was saying was absurd, but then she realized she was the one that was being absurd by attempting to deny it or make it seem ridiculous.

Claire saw the realization in her and laughed at her. “It’s cool, Mia, remember this is me.” Claire pointed to herself and smiled brightly. “I’ve known you forever and you’ve never talked about anyone the way you have with Nick. But hey, how about you take small steps and we can cross bridges another time.”

“I like that idea.” Mia nodded getting off the bed.

They walked down the stairs. As soon as they got to the bottom she saw Nick in the corridor near the kitchen. He had on his white biker jacket so she couldn’t tell if he was coming in or going out. He didn’t see them as he was looking at something on his phone.

“Now’s your chance,” Claire whispered. “And he looks really good in that jacket.”

He did look good. And Mia liked the way his dark jeans displayed the strength and definition in his long legs.

“Bye,” Claire whispered, giving Mia’s shoulders an encouraging squeeze.

She left, going through the door as quietly as she could.

Mia turned to watch her go, and when she looked back to Nick she saw that he was already looking at her.

“Hi.” She smiled at him, feeling knots form in her stomach.

“Hi, babe,” he replied.

She moved closer to him, feeling the anticipation build within her. “I was beginning to think you were this mythical creature I wouldn’t see again.” She smiled, going for light-hearted conversation.

Something about him seemed uneasy, uncomfortable even.

“I’ve been busy working on the case and setting up my office.”

“Oh,” she said and bit the inside of her lip.

He gave her that look where he stared deeply into her eyes, then he looked down to his phone and back to her.

“Do you want to hang out? We could watch a movie.” There, she did it, just like Claire suggested.

“I have some stuff…stuff I have to take care of.”

“Oh, sure, that’s fine. Maybe tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow’s…not great.”

This felt like that thing most guys did when they no longer had interest in you. However, that was usually after something had happened. It felt like something had happened to them, but she didn’t know what.

“Have I done something, Nick?” Again, like Claire said, there was no point worrying and wondering.

“No, of course not. Why would you think that?”

“Well it’s kind of hard not to when you tell me you’ll take care of me and then I don’t see you.”

“Babe.” He reached out and touched her cheek. “I’m sorry I…” He lingered by her chin for a few seconds and then pulled away.

“What?”

“I’ll make time soon. I promise. Okay?” He smiled.

“Okay.”

Silence filled the space between them for a few awkward seconds and all they did was look at each other. He broke eye contact and looked down to her breasts, but she knew he wasn’t looking at her in the pervy way that most guys did.

“Are you wearing it?” he asked, keeping his gaze there.

He could only mean the necklace.

She smiled and nodded. “I am.”

It was only some tops that displayed it. She liked that the diamond settled right between her cleavage. A wicked thought crossed her mind, which she had to blame on Claire’s influence.

She undid the button at the top of her blouse and moved the soft cotton away on either side so that he could see it. Along with the slight hint of pink lace on her bra and the deep swells of her breasts.

When something raw and primal flickered in his eyes as he looked, a sense of satisfaction swept through her and grew when he reached forward to take the little pendant into his hands. His fingers brushed against her skin, making it hot, spreading warmth throughout her entire body.

The same heat filled his eyes when he looked from the pendant to the swells of her breasts and froze there.

Her skin started to tingle and her pulse raced. He’d never looked at her like that before, and if she were in any doubt about something changing between them the confirmation was all there.

“Take care of it, baby.”

Baby.

She couldn’t help but smile against the wave of desire that raced through her.

“Always,” she breathed.

His eyes searched hers and she became lost in his blue gaze. He let go of the pendant, allowing it to settle between her breasts, then stepped backwards.

“We’ll hang out…soon,” he promised.

“I’ll hold you to that.”

She loved the little smile he gave her before he backed away and turned down the corridor.

Mia pulled in a breath to clear the heat from her head. She didn’t think she’d ever gotten so worked up over anyone. Thank God she hadn’t stuck with worrying and wondering.

She made her way back to her room, now excited at the prospect of hanging out with him.

* * *

Damn it, he had to take a cold shower.

Him.

Nick could almost laugh at himself, except that there was nothing funny about the situation. He wanted a woman he was told he couldn’t have. She was off limits, out of bounds, and supposed to be out of his mind.

He could have cursed Glenn for putting him in this position and for casting judgment on him when he hadn’t done anything wrong.

Nick understood Glenn’s reasoning behind it. But to go as far as telling him to not go there with Mia, that didn’t feel like it was okay, and he couldn’t say that things between them had been the same since the talk.

He’d outrightly tried to avoid Mia, and Glenn, too. Since that night he couldn’t think about Glenn without getting angry.

He’d distracted himself with work, which was coming along really well. And taking form in a manner that he never quite expected. Being away from the house made him spend more time with Sawyer.

Sawyer came up with some fantastic ideas that got Nick thinking, and he agreed to a subcontract with the police department. It was the kind of contract that was in line with what he wanted, where they’d hire him as needed. It was pretty much the way they worked now, but it was just making it more official on paper that he was their preferred investigator who be outsourced when a case came up. That way he could work with other detectives, not just Sawyer.

Again Sawyer highlighted Nick’s much-needed skill, which was becoming quite evident, again, as they tried to track down Alan and the paintings.

Nick had managed to pinpoint a location where he thought the paintings could have been taken to, it also turned out to be an address that flagged up on their system for sightings of stolen cars and a few other items of value like jewelry.

He’d singled out the location when it came up as one of the drop-off points for the elusive company that took the paintings out of the facility. They’d managed to get the license plate details from CCTV, and from there tracked the van.

Last week they found the van, but it was left deserted in a parking lot in Boston. It was completely empty and cleaned out. The local police had taken fingerprint samples, but so far there weren’t any matches.

The van was a dead end but served some purpose in helping him pick out the drop-off address, which they’d be looking at today. He singled out the location for the simplest of reasons: the van had stayed there for the least amount of time. That was it, but it was enough for him to want to check it out.

Nick had always been the kind of guy that checked everything out even when it looked like nothing. In this case, when they ran the address through the database it came up with all sorts of red signals.

He didn’t think they’d find the paintings there, but was hoping for a lead.

Nick went to the station early to see Sawyer the next day. He’d been leaving as early as he could to avoid Glenn. Mia tended to wake up a little later so that was taken care of. He didn’t think he could stand being in the same room with the two of them. Glenn casting him evil stares and Mia turning him on so much he’d have to jump in a bath filled with ice.

“What’s up, man? You’re early,” Sawyer said with a bright smile as Nick went into his office.

Nick laughed. “Just eager to start the day. I’m stuck on military time.”

“I guess I’m the same.” Sawyer nodded. “You ever think of going back?”

“I don’t know.” Nick grabbed a seat in front of Sawyer. “I feel like I did my time. Are you thinking of going back?”

Sawyer loved being a Marine. The guy was invincible and part of the elite that used to get sent on some crazy-ass missions.

“Sometimes I think I could, but I feel the same, I feel like I did my time, too. Now we serve in a different sort of way. I won’t lie though, I always thought I’d do well in the Black Ops.” He brought his hand up thoughtfully to his stubbly chin.

“Well with your track record I wouldn’t be too shocked if they didn’t recruit you. If you get a call put in a good word for me.” Nick leaned back against the chair. He wouldn’t have minded being in the Black Ops, too, but honestly, he didn’t think that sort of life was for him anymore.

He had done his time and wanted to take his life in a different direction now.

“I would, Nick, but I would never be so cruel as to take you away from the little woman.” Sawyer started to laugh when he saw Nick’s look of surprise.

“What little woman?” Nick shrugged raising his hands.

“Oh please, you’re going to ask me that? Me? We had each other’s backs in wartime, man. That means we know each other. But if you want me to spell it out I will. Mia. Don’t tell me you aren’t sweet on her.”

Nick was about to protest but stopped himself and instead brought his hand up to his face, pressing his hand against his cheek as he thought about how shit the situation was.

“And it looks like I just hit a nerve,” Sawyer noted, straightening up. He changed his light-hearted, jovial manner and now looked at Nick concerned. “What’s up, bro?”

“A lot, but maybe it’s best not to talk about it. If no one talks about a problem it eventually disappears.”

“Does it? I thought it festers into something else until it blows up.” Sawyer chuckled.

Nick sighed. He couldn’t argue because that’s how he felt, like he’d blow up.

“I like her and I shouldn’t,” Nick reasoned.

Sawyer frowned and blinked several times, not seeming to understand. “Is she seeing someone?”

“No.”

“Are you seeing someone you haven’t told me about?”

“No.”

“This isn’t really making much sense to me, Nick. Why shouldn’t you like her? She’s hot, man.”

“I know.” He nodded and smirked. “I’ve known her for as long as I’ve known Glenn.”

Nick knew that Sawyer got on okay with Glenn when they all met up as a group, but they would never hang out together. Sawyer had never said it in so many words, but Nick got the feeling that he didn’t like Glenn too much.

“Of course. That’s a whole lot of years. Nothing ever happened between you two?”

“No.”

“Seriously, not even a kiss?” Sawyer smiled.

“No, it just felt like I was always so much older than her. Eight years older can be very significant when you’ve known someone for that long.”

“Until it’s like you’re the same age.” Sawyer raised his brows. “You never even thought to make a move on her when she was twenty and you were twenty-eight? I would have.”

“I thought about it and nearly did. But then her big brother warned me away.”

Glenn?” Sawyer asked in disbelief.

Nick filled him in quickly on what was happening. He just had to get it all off his chest. It felt good to talk, and to talk to someone who knew him. He used to think that was Glenn but clearly it wasn’t.

“That is messed up. You’re the best guy I know.” Sawyer nodded.

“Would you let me date your sister?” Nick raised his brows.

Sawyer nodded without any thought to the question. “I would most definitely, if she was single.” He laughed. “I’ve seen all sides to you, man. You’re a good person. Glenn should know that. He’s known you a lot longer than I have. I get that he wasn’t in the Marines with you, but he should know what kind of person you are.”

“I appreciate that, but to Glenn I’m a womanizing playboy who will take advantage of his vulnerable sister.”

“That’s out of line, man,” Sawyer stated, shaking his head.

“It’s what he thinks, and I feel like I have to respect his wishes.”

“What?” Sawyer narrowed his eyes at him. “Is that how you’re seriously going to play this?”

“I’d feel guilty. All I have to do is look at her and I want her. Then I feel like I betrayed my friend.” Like last night.

If Glenn had seen them in the corridor, with Nick’s hands practically on Mia’s breasts, he would have gone ape shit.

Even now he felt like he was betraying Glenn when he thought of how her massive breasts looked in that little blouse. He’d never forget the image of her unbuttoning the top button and moving away the fabric, showing him more than he’d ever seen of her. That diamond looked real good nestled in the deep crevice of her cleavage. He wanted to touch her and see her properly. And if the restraint hadn’t been placed on him, he would have picked her up, carried her to his room, and devoured her.

Being told he couldn’t have her was making him want her more. It was driving him insane with need.

“I think the whole thing is a little unfair,” Sawyer said, regarding him firmly.

“He’s just worried for her,” Nick offered, even though he agreed.

“All big brothers who care worry over their younger sisters. I sure do, but if I was Glenn and I had any form of inkling that you might like my sister, we’d talk about it if I had any concerns or worries. I wouldn’t forbid you from seeing her. But that’s me. I see you as a good guy.”

“And Glenn doesn’t.” It hurt Nick to acknowledge that.

“Bro, I hate to point out the obvious here, but have you considered what Mia might think? It sounds like she has feelings for you, too, and I’m sorry…I know you boys go way back, but I’m not a big fan of Glenn. I get that he may be concerned for his sister, but is this really his decision to make?”

Nick hadn’t actually thought about it from that angle.

What would Mia want? He knew she had feelings for him, but would she want him?

Would she want him the way he wanted her?

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