Chapter Thirteen
As Jake climbed the endless stairs from the sidewalk up to Kate’s walk-up apartment, the same question that had been on his mind all day muscled its way back to the forefront. What the hell am I doing? He was an island guy. She was a city girl. Relationships were her deal. He’d already tried and failed. But every minute of the day with her had been amazing. Interesting and challenging and fun. And every time he kissed her, she felt less like a friend—benefits or no benefits—and more like, hell, he didn’t know…a woman he could love.
Which was bullshit, because he was incapable of love. Especially the kind a woman like Kate Bell needed. How had she described it? Star-spangled, bell-ringing love.
Of course, she’d been heavily influenced by martinis at the time, but still. He was pretty sure she meant it. And after that kiss in the temple. He paused to check how many more flights he had to go and tried to shake off the memory, but that was one hell of a kiss. Sexy, yes. Illicit even, but more. Deeper. More than a simple benefit.
Shit. This was not him. He was a guy incapable of succeeding in a long-term relationship. Emotionally closed off. Uninterested. Whatever the reason. He stopped to look up. Two more flights to go. Damn, August in the city is hot.
Maybe that was the answer. The city. Back here. Spending time with her in his old haunts. Now he was in Brooklyn. Just an emotional roller coaster. He felt sure of it. He’d wrap up a plan for marketing the book. She’d finish the floors, nab her exclusive. He’d go back to Paradise. No harm. No foul. Because he didn’t want to hurt her, and despite the fact that she’d inspired all these feelings in him, and in a way, their “relationship” had given life to his new theory, he worried that—no matter what she said—Kate needed more. More than he could give.
Outside of her apartment, he took a few breaths. He knocked on the door, still thinking his new theory was on the right track, but one look at Kate standing in the doorway of her Brooklyn walk-up knocked the wind out of him.
“Come on in,” she said, leaning on the doorframe in a way that emphasized her curves and made him wonder if two more days with Kate Bell would be enough. “I’m almost ready.”
As she disappeared into the back of the small apartment, Jake stepped inside, thinking she looked perfect already. Clad in a black T-shirt dress and the strappy kind of sandal a guy could get addicted to, she looked sexy and adorable in that sweet Midwestern way of hers. Lovely and undone. No jewelry, no so-called bling. Hell, the woman knew the specs on an F-series. A BMW, or worse, a Hummer, wasn’t on her radar. He loved that his celebrity status, or current lack thereof, never came up. She’d seemed to care for him when he was just an island guy. She’d be happy with a simple life but deserved the best.
Hell, where did that come from? His heart shifted inside his chest, but he shoved away the short tug of emotion. Normally, he’d be in control of his feelings, but seeing her right now, looking the way she did, he was back on the damn roller coaster. He let go of a low whistle, watching her work her way back into the mostly unfurnished living area.
A pretty flush colored her cheeks. “Ready for a little more research?”
He took a few slow steps in her direction. “I’m thinking we should stay in and delve a little deeper into our original subject,” he said, glancing around the walk-up. “You’ve got a kitchen floor in here, right?”
“My kitchen floor is off-limits.”
“How about your closet?” he asked, nodding toward the door off the narrow entry. “Is that off-limits?”
“My closet?”
He chuckled, certain her mind was imagining all kinds of kink. He glanced down at the strappy shoes. “Those need to come off.” Along with the dress and the red lacy combination he hoped was tucked underneath there. He shook his head in an effort to keep his sexy imaginings at bay. “You need sneakers.”
“Sneakers?” she said, glancing down at the shoes,
“I thought we were doing dinner and drinks. Isn’t that a traditional contemporary relationship type of date,” she said in a rush, as if she was nervous about the kind of alternative date he might have planned. “Or really, it’s better to go with just a drink first, and during a quick trip to the ladies’ room if a girl gets a friend’s approval via Snapchat, then the drink can sometimes lead to dinner. Traditionally.”
Jake rolled his eyes. “Women are too complicated.” He gave her a pointed look. “Besides you did take me to a Buddhist temple, so maybe I’m thinking I need to step up my game. Better to mix it up a little.”
“So we’re mixing it up?” Kate sat on her couch, one of a few pieces in the sparsely furnished space and traded her sandals for a cute pair of lace-up sneakers. He shook off the crystal-clear image of his hands skimming across her thighs, caressing those familiar legs.
Get it together, Jake. Hell, the woman’s only changing her shoes. “We’re mixing it up.”
“Sounds like fun.” Finished tying on the sneakers, she tossed him a flirty wink that caused more of the long-standing knot in his chest to ease. “So, this place we’re going—does it qualify as one of your secrets?”
His brows knit together, not sure what she meant. “My secrets?”
“Learn Your Partner’s Secrets.” She walked over, her curls cascading around her shoulders, reminding him of how she looked lying beneath him at the cove, her blonde hair fanned out across his old quilt. He shook his head and tried to snap out of it.
“From The Sex Factor,” she continued. “Your so-called seduction plan. Your list of rules? I mean, I know the exclusive will be on your new book, but I thought linking it to the first would be a cool way to go. Thought I’d open with your rules. Be Spontaneous, Learn Your Partner’s Secrets…”
Oh, right—his book. His rules of seduction.
“No secrets here.” He shoved his hands deep into his pockets as a stab of guilt knifed him in the gut. Yes, he’d not told her how his latest theory extolled the virtues of no-strings attached, a concept diametrically opposed to her romantic ideals. Was he keeping a secret? Not the sexy kind from his book, but the kind that broke people apart. Probably. Did it matter?
Despite the real joy he was finding with her, by the time this next book hit the shelves, he’d be back on the island. Content. Living in peace. He was only in New York to wrap up the sale of the apartment and fulfill his contract. A sexy exclusive with this beautiful, inescapably endearing woman—not part of the plan. Neither was the way he felt when he looked at her. Or his relentless need to kiss her. His gaze fell to that insanely kissable mouth.
“Intimacy isn’t about secrets, or even revelation; it’s about the falling away of barriers.” Her dress drifted from her shoulder. He lifted it back in place, images of a star-spangled bikini strap and a sun-kissed shoulder filling his thoughts.
He turned her hand over in his. Kissed her palm. Heard her soft intake of breath. “Intimacy is about knowing your partner, her needs and fantasies, and trusting her to know yours.”
And damned if he didn’t want to know her. Not just one piece of her. All of her.
…
“Coney Island,” she marveled quietly beneath her breath, already anticipating one of her favorite foods in the city. “How did you know I love Coney Island?”
Kate stood near the edge of the amphitheater and gazed up at the dark star-studded sky, as The Romantics rocked out a cool version of “A Night Like This.” Perfect song, perfect guy. In fact, she was pretty damn sure tonight was the best night ever. Jake was right; this kind of date was so much more fun than talking finance or business over dinner. He was so much more fun, she thought, lifting her face to the moonlit sky. Yes, he was leaving in thirty-six hours, and maybe he wasn’t The One, but he was still the best she’d ever had.
“An underrated classic.” Jake appeared at her shoulder, carrying two Nathan’s hot dogs and a Cherry Coke. The Coney Island special.
She accepted a dog and the soda. “Not your favorite rhythm and blues.”
“But The Romantics? Totally my speed.” He dove into the hot dog like a little kid, and Kate’s heart melted like the ice in her drink. Last time he was here, he’d shared a day with his dad. One of the last. Kate thought about her parents and knew she was lucky, and her insides ached for him. For the boy he was, and for the gorgeous, guarded man he’d become. One day, she hoped he’d stop hiding. He’d seemed more open this afternoon than she’d ever seen him. Maybe this trip was his first step.
“Best date ever.” She took a sip of her soda and gave him a slanted look.
He laughed aloud, and she realized how much she was starting to love that sound. “Not saying much considering you suck at dating.”
She bit into the hot dog. “Well, maybe I’m getting better.”
He wiped a trace of the spicy mustard from her lip. “I’d bet you were always good.”
Gazing up at him, she drew in a breath, counting seven seconds in her head in an attempt to stay focused on her career-first, love-will-find-you platform. Because no matter how sexy his laugh. No matter how fun the time with him felt. She was this close to her dream of a Cosmo byline coming true. But if she indulged in one night of great sex in Manhattan, would it be so bad? She could have him. At least for one more night. She wanted to be self-actualized, a woman in charge, rather than a woman swayed by charm and music and moonlight, she did, she really, really did. But she wanted to kiss him again, too. If she was honest, there was more than kissing on her mind. So much more. Could she handle it—another intimate night with him, a falling away of all her barriers?
Or would it wreck her?
As if attempting to answer the question, Jake laced his fingers through hers and gently tugged her away from the edge of the amphitheater. “Ready to up the ante on researching your exclusive?”
Finished with her Coney dog and Coke, she tossed the wrapper into a nearby trash bin. “Depends on what you mean by ‘upping the ante.’”
A wicked grin creased his impossibly gorgeous face.
“We’re going to test the most important rule of navigating contemporary relationships.” He held onto her hand and moved expertly through the nighttime crowd.
Following along as their footsteps fell completely in sync, she gave his hand a squeeze. “What’s the most important rule?”
He threw her a smile that spelled trouble. “Be brave.”
…
“There’s no way I am going on that.” Kate took one look at Deno’s Wonder Wheel and decided the answer was no—no, no—definitely not.
“Yes, you’re taking on The Wheel. Trust me, you’ll love it.” His hand pressed gently into the small of her back, ushering her forward. “Let’s get in line, or we’ll miss the best part.”
Feet planted on the concrete walkway, she stared up at the beast. “There is no good part about turning circles in a fifteen story wheel of Bethlehem steel.”
“This is critical to making your love life more fun.”
“A carnival ride?”
“No, being bold, stepping out of the comfort zone.”
“I am very comfortable in the zone.”
He chuckled and pulled her gently back against his chest. “C’mon, city girl, The Wonder Wheel is a New York landmark, the view from the top is incredible, and it’s an amazing piece of construction. Almost one hundred years old, and the Wheel boasts a perfect safety record.”
She gave him a slanted look. “Perfect?”
“Perfect.” Arms wrapped around her, he marched them over to the ticket window, “Besides, it’s either this or karaoke in the Mermaid Lounge.”
“The Wheel it is.”
He let out a laugh, a relaxed, happy sound that almost made her think a whirl around the giant wheel was worth it. At the window, Jake let go of her, and she missed the feel of him immediately—the warmth of his chest against her back, the clean and spicy scent of his skin. He plunked down the money for two tickets, and when the pretty twenty-something in the booth gave him a flirtatious smile, a rush of misplaced jealousy ricocheted through her system. Jake turned away and settled his blue gaze on her, his sweet, lingering look making her feel wanted.
He took her hand in his, and they made their way past the smiling clown that beckoned: More Rides This Way. As if they weren’t about to step into a gravity-defying death trap.
As they snaked through the line beneath the blue-and-orange steel wheel, Jake kept her hand in his, dropping kisses on her lips, promising caramel apples and cotton candy while Kate tried not to hyperventilate. Be brave. Why can’t revitalizing a girl’s love life involve something a little less terrifying? Something on the ground?
“Are you sure this monster has a perfect record?” She climbed into the swinging blue car and nodded at the yellow-and-black sign that read: Danger: Keep Your Hands and Feet in the Car at All Times. Like anyone was going to try and bust out of this cage.
Jake climbed in behind her and tucked her in his arms. “I’m sure.”
A loud clicking sound ratcheted up her fear, and the car swung out as the wheel turned, lifting them into the night sky. A small cry escaped her as they climbed higher, colored lights swirling all around them, the dark sandy beach disappearing beneath their feet.
As the wheel approached the top, Jake brushed a kiss across her temple before the car tumbled over the edge, practically swinging into the car in front of them. Her heart leaped into her throat, and yet, she still felt safe with him. The park’s closing fireworks exploded all around them, and she turned to let her lips meet his, feeling brave despite her pounding heart, certain this terrifying moment, wrapped up in the arms of this nice guy, would be the most romantic moment of her life.
“I need to kiss you again,” he whispered against her lips. “Not just once. All night.”
“All night,” she said, wrapping her elbows around his neck, entwining her fingers deep into his dark hair, and melting into his arms.
…
The park bustled with the happy crowd of late summer patrons, couples holding hands, kids eating funnel cake and Italian ice, teenagers making out under the colorful lights of the B&B Carousell. Jake linked his fingers through hers, and gave them a squeeze, feeling like a kid himself.
As they meandered toward the exit, he bent to give her a quick kiss, savoring the taste of her lips mixed with her mint chocolate chip ice cream. Sweet. But not as sweet as the woman. Smiling up at him, she licked the cone. Sexy, too. He smiled back at her, feeling at home in a way he hadn’t for a long time. Maybe, ever.
“Game for another bit of research?”
“Does it involve more kissing?”
“Possibly.”
Still smiling, she said, “Then I’m game.”
With her hand in his, they criss-crossed toward the front of the park through the graffiti-laden tunnels and under the Coney Island archway, the exit ablaze in shining red and gold lights. Passed the gate, they continued down the boardwalk. The sky was a deep shade of navy, lit by the stars, the glowing carnival lights of the park, and the arcades along the boardwalk.
“Do you like baseball?” he asked.
She gave him a sidelong glance. “Don’t tell me your lesson plan involves me throwing a strikeout.”
“Baseball is plenty romantic,” he said, continuing before she could argue the point, “but no, you won’t be tossing any pitches tonight.” He smiled and looked over at the old site of Steeplechase Park, one of Brooklyn’s original amusement parks, now occupied by MCU Park, a Minor league baseball stadium, home to the Brooklyn Cyclones, the Mets minor league team. When he was a kid, he’d sneak down here to listen to the games from outside the place. “Maybe I’ll take you to a game sometime.”
She nodded, a quizzical expression on her face as she dove back into her mint chocolate chip. “I’d like that.”
Jake understood the look. But just because their relationship was meant to be short-term didn’t mean he couldn’t take her to a ball game when he was in the city. Or was that exactly what it meant? Next time he showed up, would she be with someone else? He gave her hand another squeeze, tucked her close against his body, and cut down the planked boardwalk toward Brighton Beach.
Tucked away near the ocean was a small playground, a slide, a few swings, the red paint chipping in places. Not much. But he’d spent a lot of afternoons here throwing a ball against the slide, looking at the park rides, breathing in the ocean air. He’d felt safe here. Safer than at home, and he wanted to share this place and this moment with her.
“Here we are,” he said, gesturing toward the park.
She finished her cone, tossed her napkin into a nearby metal trashcan, and wandered toward the play set. A smile lit up her face as she touched the silver links of the swing’s chain. “I never knew this was here. This is amazing.”
The edge of his mouth lifted in wry agreement, knowing the chain was beat up and bound to be worn rusted in places, and charmed by her obvious enjoyment of the place. “Not as swanky as the bigger park farther down the boardwalk. But I spent a lot of time here as a kid.”
She slipped onto one of the swings. “I can see you here, sporting a pair of red-hot swimming trunks, racing your friends up from the beach.”
Jake dug his hands into his pockets. “Definitely no red-hot swim trunks. Mostly, I was on my own. A bit of a loner. Not many friends.” When she didn’t respond, he continued. “Life as a kid was okay. Most of our neighbors supported my mom. Watched out for us, tried to make sure we stayed out of trouble, which in the case of my brother…”
“Pretty tough.”
He smiled. He’d forgotten she knew Nick. “Yes, pretty tough.” He stepped behind the swing and gave her a gentle push. “But good as the neighbors were…no one wanted their kids around my dad, so…”
“No friends hanging out watching baseball.”
“Not unless the kid was the bookie’s kid.” He gave the swing another push. “I spent a lot of time on my own. Jane worked at the pizza shop, Nick was busy chasing girls, and I was here, throwing the baseball against the slide, fielding it like I was a shortstop for the Yankees.”
She arched back to look at him, a smile on her face. “Sounds pretty lonely.”
“Maybe.” Truth was it had been bitterly lonely. “Worked out. I spent a lot of time getting real good at baseball. Earned a scholarship, studied, got a break with the book.” He sat on the swing next to her.
“I’d have been your friend.”
Jake smiled back at her, prettier here in the moonlight than he’d ever seen her, not the kind of girl who would’ve looked twice at him in his ratty tennis shoes, carrying the secondhand baseball glove his brother had bought him at Goodwill.
“Hey.” She dragged her feet in the sand to bring her swing to a stop. “I definitely would have been your friend.”
But with a heart as sweet as her smile, he could almost believe it. He caught the edge of her swing and tugged her close. “And I definitely would’ve wanted to kiss you.”
She reached for the chain of his swing and inched closer. “So what are you waiting for? You did say there might be some kissing.”
“I did. I said there might…possibly…be kissing,” he said, brushing his lips against hers as he spoke.
“I really like kissing you,” she murmured as her swing bumped into his.
He sunk his hands into her hair, tugging her closer. “Enjoying every minute. Being spontaneous and playful is an important part of a healthy love life.”
“Brave. Spontaneous. Playful.” Their swings now entwined, she balanced her hands on his shoulders to deepen the kiss, pulling away to gaze into his eyes. “Got it.”
“And intimate.”
“Definitely intimate.”
Looking into her eyes, Jake felt awed by the fact that he was here, on this beat-up swing set in the shadow of the park’s golden lights, kissing this woman. A wave crashed behind them. Just a friends-with-benefits relationship. The thought kicked him in the stomach. Maybe he hadn’t worked it all through. She was a Relationship girl. But relationships were his thing, too. His expertise. Had he miscalculated? He wanted to tell her everything, but she pulled his mouth down to her in a mint-chocolate kiss that was sweeter than any he’d known. And all rational thought disappeared. They remained there in the moonlight, legs entwined, swings bumping up against one another, kissing until they were both breathless, until mere kissing simply wasn’t enough.
“Ready to get out of here?” She nodded, her cheek buried, warm against his neck. “Your place or mine?” he teased.
She lifted her chin, a smile pulling at the edge of her lips. “Mine’s closer.”
“Your place it is.”