Thirteen
The DC Insider: Word on the street is Ellie Gold is working miracles with Derrick Jameson. Is he getting soft? There are no signs of that in business, of course, but she has him jumping to her commands in private. So maybe those nasty rumors we’re hearing aren’t true?
Two days later Ellie was still in a good mood. She even managed to ignore the guy taking her photo as she walked into the coffee shop a few blocks from Derrick’s house.
They had hit a bit of a bump at the charity event but they’d ridden through it. She wanted that to mean something. They could talk about work and their arrangement and even their families. Right from the beginning they’d vowed not to lie to each other.
Despite all that, she couldn’t think of a way to broach what, a few weeks ago when they’d first met, would have been unthinkable—talking about them. She knew it was easier to ignore the elephant standing in not only the room but also right on top of them than to deal with him. “Going along as is” meant dating and living together and getting to know each other.
For her, something deeper and meaningful had grown out of that. Derrick was so much harder to read.
And he wasn’t the only one. She entered the coffee shop and slipped through the long line of people waiting to order. Noah sat at a table across the room, head down and not talking to or looking at anyone. He wore a baseball cap pulled low, like every other twenty-year-old in DC, and studied his phone.
Derrick told her he’d talked with Noah but hadn’t been able to break through. Seeing her brother spin and knowing he would be in very big trouble without Derrick’s interference was the kind of thing that kept her up at night.
She made it the whole way to the table without him looking up. Nothing new there. Eye contact was not one of his strengths.
She pulled out a chair and sat across from him. “Why did you want to meet here?”
She’d given him her new house address. The temporary one with Derrick. Suggested he come over and they talk in private. Noah had said no to all of it.
He kept tapping buttons on his phone, only sparing a glance or two in her direction. “To avoid Derrick.”
“Are you afraid of him now?” When she didn’t get an immediate answer, she put a hand over the screen and lowered the phone to the table. “Well?”
“Let’s say I know he’ll do almost anything to get his way.”
“You might want to lay off the videos because you now talk in shortcuts. It’s annoying.”
“Then how about this.” Noah leaned forward, his elbows on the table. “He’s cheating on you.”
The word bounced through her. A wave of nausea followed right behind it. “What?”
“There’s a woman at work.”
The accusation didn’t make sense. “No way.”
“I’m serious, Ellie.”
If Derrick had a girlfriend, then why wasn’t she visiting his house? Why wasn’t he using this other woman as his fake girlfriend?
How could he sleep with her but be with someone else?
Ellie couldn’t imagine any woman going along with that type of ruse and all the lies. Not if she cared about Derrick and vice versa. It was too dangerous and so disrespectful. Which brought her full circle. Derrick had a lot of flaws. She could spend an hour listing them, but being crappy to women wasn’t one of them. Not that she’d seen.
Too many people would have to be quiet. She’d overheard the whispers at his office and none of them were about another woman. Someone at the Insider would know the truth and report it.
As soon as she reasoned it out, the choking sensation in her throat eased. So did the need to pound things.
She inhaled, trying to stay focused. If she let her mind wander, she’d be on the phone or in Derrick’s office demanding an explanation and she didn’t want to do that. He’d been accused of enough. “You’re saying you know this because you worked there?”
“I never met her. This Abby. Apparently something happened with her months ago.”
That barely sounded like a thing. A bit more of her anxiety disappeared. “Noah, you’re talking about rumors and not facts.”
Noah spun an empty coffee cup around between his palms. The edges clicked against the table. “I’m trying to make you see that he’s not worth it.”
“Why?”
He closed his fist over the cup with enough force to collapse the sides with a loud crunch. “What?”
“Why is it so important to you that I think that?” That part never made sense to her. It was one thing if he thought he was falsely accused and wanted revenge. But he seemed so determined for her to think everything about Derrick was awful. That he wasn’t only a bad boss or a mean one, but a terrible cheating human being, as well.
The whole thing struck her as overkill. Like hurt feelings and crushed emotions.
“I know what it’s like to be taken in by him.” Noah continued to stare at his smashed cup.
“He hired you without any experience. Gave you a job and a place to go.”
Noah’s head shot up. “He abandoned me as soon as he needed a scapegoat.”
The conversation pinged around. Noah seemed to move from one perceived Derrick sin to another. All of them seemed to come from the same place—somewhere personal. For the first time she realized this was about way more than work or a paycheck.
She slid her hand across the table, not quite touching Noah’s. “Meet with him. I’ll be there and we’ll talk this out.”
“We’ve talked. He tried to convince me I was wrong when the two of us met at your apartment.”
“Try again.”
“Can’t you just believe me?” His voice grew louder until a few people sitting nearby glanced over at them.
She refused to be derailed. “I know you’re angry with him.”
“Forget it.” He pulled the brim of his hat down even further and stood. The legs of the chair screeched against the hard floor.
“Noah.”
He finally gave her full eye contact. “I never thought you’d pick some random guy over me.”
Her heart hurt. “That’s not what this is.”
He shrugged. “Feels like it.”
Then he walked away.
* * *
Ellie was waiting for him when he got home tonight. Not upstairs in the kitchen or sitting on the couch. Not even on her laptop searching for jobs. She was actually standing at the top of the steps.
He knew that was a really bad sign.
He barely reached the second floor when she launched into her question. “Who is Abby?”
She didn’t move when he got to her. No, she stood there, arms crossed, wearing what looked like a day-long-practiced frown.
He should work from home while they were in this relationship. That would stop ambushes like this from happening. “You talked with your brother.”
“I tried to get through to him again.”
When she didn’t move, he put a hand on her arm and gently guided her into the kitchen with him. “I thought we agreed I’d handle it.”
They didn’t even get to the counter before she turned and faced him again. Stopped them both in their tracks. “By putting our names in the paper all the time? That’s defusing his impact, but it’s not stopping him for good.”
The Insider again. The gossip column proved useful. Everyone seemed more interested in his love life than in a dispute with a former employee. No one was taking Noah seriously and he was losing viewers, which meant losing some of his power.
Derrick didn’t know how people could stand to sign on and hear Noah rave about one guy all the time. That thing had to get old. It certainly had for Derrick.
So did fighting with Ellie. Usually the verbal battles invigorated him. Not the ones about Noah. Talking about him seemed to suck the life out of both of them.
He set his briefcase on the counter and brushed his fingers through her soft hair. “Any chance you could trust me?”
“I do.”
It sure as hell didn’t feel like it. “You’re asking about Abby. You’re meeting with Noah without telling me.”
“And you’re sounding more like my boss than...”
“What?”
“The man I’m sleeping with.”
Okay, he liked that answer and since he intended to keep doing just that, he loosened his rule on talking about this subject. The Abby issue went back to his father and their family dysfunction, but there was no way to explain that without blowing his relationship with Spence apart. “Abby has nothing to do with me.”
Ellie frowned at him. “Derrick, that’s not an answer.”
He tried again. “She works for me.”
“Okay.” Ellie’s eyebrow lifted as if she expected more.
But to him that’s exactly what Abby was—a great employee he’d fought not to lose. “That’s it.”
Ellie stepped away from him. She walked around the counter to sit on one of the stools. “You are making this unnecessarily difficult.”
“I’m answering you.”
“Did you sleep with her?” Ellie ticked off the questions on her fingers. “Are the two of you having an affair?”
“When the hell would I have time for that? I’m here with you or at work with Jackson. That’s it. That’s all I do.”
“That answer.” She shook her head. “Good grief, Derrick.”
He had no idea what she wanted from him. This part of a real relationship...he wasn’t a fan. People trusted him. The idea that, after a brief meeting with her brother, she no longer did, made Derrick want to rip down the walls of his house with his bare hands.
“I haven’t been with anyone since I met you. I haven’t even thought of anyone else since I met you.” The idea of touching another woman made everything inside him rebel. “You are it for me.”
The words had slipped out. He didn’t mean to say them, not like that. Certainly not out loud. He was talking about her being it for now...right?
There were many facts stacked against them. He hadn’t told her everything. They had a mess with her brother. He needed to come clean with his brothers. Hell, he wasn’t even sure she liked him all that much. He could ask, but he dreaded the answer.
She was supposed to be temporary. His focus had to stay on the business and meeting his father’s requirements and getting the work part of his life settled. The company meant everything to him. He’d poured so much into it. He couldn’t lose focus or his father would swoop in.
That reality of his whole life being up in the air scared the hell out of him. He tried to manage everything around him and suddenly his usual skills failed him. Admitting that he might be on a road that was off his plan made him want to head to work. Do something to burn off the odd sensation running through him. This unsettled feeling he was losing control of every single part of his life.
“Right now. I mean, I feel that way right now.” He had no idea why he’d added that except that he’d been trying to convince himself it was true.
Her smile fell. “Interesting qualification.”
“I’m not sure what you want me to do here. I feel like there isn’t a right answer.” If there was, he sure as hell couldn’t find it.
She sighed at him in that way that told him he was missing the mark by a mile. “Who is Abby? A real answer this time.”
“She and Spence had a thing. It’s complicated, and messy, and my dad screwed it all up. Honestly, it’s not my story to tell. I mean, I will if you want me to, but we have a bigger issue.”
“Noah.” She nodded. “He delivered some envelope to the Insider about you cheating on me, or is about to. I think this might be your new PR issue.”
“No one is going to care that a single businessman is sleeping around.”
She snorted. “How comforting.”
He sensed trying to explain would only make it worse, so he skipped ahead. “My point is I can fix it.”
“What?”
His heart thundered in his chest. It echoed in his ears. This wasn’t supposed to mean anything. They had talked about it and she had known it was coming. But taking the step proved bigger than he thought.
He forced his fingers to work. Clicking the locks, he opened the briefcase and dug around until he found the small box. The one he’d had since the day after their first date.
“This is the way we start taking control.” He took the blue box out and skidded it across the marble countertop in her general direction. “Here.”
She stared at it but didn’t pick it up. “What are you—?”
“An engagement ring.”
When she looked up at him again... That was not happiness he saw. Her teeth clenched.
“Did you hand me a box with a fake diamond ring in it?”
What the hell? “It’s not fake.”
“You’re offended by my comment about the cost?”
The conversation was spinning away from him. He could see it, feel it. Hear the thread of anger in her voice. He ignored every warning sign and dived in. “I picked the ring out for you.”
“You did?” She didn’t sound even a little impressed.
“Of course. It has to look real.”
She glared at him then took a turn glaring at the box. “And now you’ve handed it to me.”
“Okay, wait a second.” He rested his palms against the counter. “I don’t get this. Are you upset about it being real or do you need it to be fake? Fill me in here.”
She looked ten seconds away from kicking him. Derrick appreciated that there was a heavy kitchen island between them right now.
“You shoved an unopened box at me and said ‘here.’” Her eyebrow lifted in challenge. “Yes?”
Okay, that sounded bad. Even he could admit that. “Uh, yeah.”
“Derrick, you have to know there’s a better way to do this.” She waved a hand in the air. “Forget that. You should see your face. You clearly don’t get it.”
“Do I look confused? Because that’s kind of where I am.”
“Fine. I’ll take this.” She grabbed the box and opened it.
She made a noise that sounded like a gasp. Hesitated before picking it up. But she did pick it up. Slid it on her finger as if it didn’t matter to her at all.
Yeah, this was not going well. “Wait.”
“I have the ring. Next provision of our agreement satisfied. Congratulations.” She slid off the bar stool and headed toward the stairs.
He didn’t even realize they were done talking. “You’re upset?”
“Yes, genius. I am.”
“But this is what we agreed to.”
She shrugged. “Then I guess we’re good.”
She sounded far from good. And if the kicking in his gut was any indication, he wasn’t doing so great, either. “I don’t understand what’s happening.”
“Your fake fiancée is going outside.”
It was nighttime and she had a rock on her finger and a heap of attitude. “Why?”
“Because you’re not there.”
* * *
Ellie managed to ignore him for the rest of the night and all of the next morning. Maybe it was immature but she needed a Derrick break. He hadn’t even let her walk away from him in peace. He’d texted her the second she stepped outside and said he was worried about her safety. She stayed on the front steps until she cooled off enough to go inside and walk right by him.
For the first time since she’d moved in, she missed morning coffee with him. She decided to have it with Vanessa instead. They sat in the same coffee shop where she’d had it out with her brother.
Vanessa stirred her second sugar packet into her coffee. “So, let me get this straight. He gave you a ring for a fake engagement you agreed to and now you’re ticked off at him for giving it to you.”
Ellie had to admit her anger sounded ridiculous when her friend put it that way. “Please don’t make me sound like the unreasonable party in this.”
Vanessa held up a hand in mock surrender. “I’m on your side. Always.”
Silence fell over the table as Ellie tried to find the right words. She was furious and hurt. This dragging sadness exhausted her.
She hated that battered-from-the-inside gnawing sensation that overtook her when she thought about the ring and Derrick. She was not the crying type, but right now she wished she was.
She didn’t even know what to say to Derrick because he wasn’t wrong. She had agreed to the fake arrangement. It had just taken him longer to launch into this part than she’d expected. She’d hoped that meant something.
“It was the way he did it.” And that was true. Even a fake arrangement deserved some sense of importance. He’d handed her a ring without even bothering to open the box.
Thinking about it, reliving the moment in her head, had fury bubbling up inside her again. Really, the man was clueless.
“You’re angry because he didn’t get on one knee and ask you?”
Ellie didn’t like that question, either. “Maybe I’m not telling this story right.”
“Hey, listen to me.” Vanessa reached her hand across the table. “There is an obvious problem here.”
“Derrick.”
“Him, too. But I think the real issue is you’re in love with him.” Vanessa winced as she said the words.
“This is about the way he—”
Vanessa fell back in her chair. “Oh, my God. You didn’t deny it.”
She couldn’t because she was. Vanessa said the words and they didn’t sound wrong. The realization terrified Ellie. She’d tried to be smart and careful, but she’d fallen. It was stupid and dangerous and would likely break her heart, but it happened.
She thought the truth would hit with a jolt. Instead it settled in and snuggled around her. But she still wanted to throw up.
Rather than deal with any of that, she fell back on her anger. On Derrick’s depressing choices. The least he could do was fall with her.
“You don’t start a fake engagement by shoving a ring at someone.” How could she not see that? Ellie thought for sure she would get an immediate agreement on that topic.
Vanessa nodded. “Okay.”
“Stop smiling.”
“I should because I’m worried about you.” The amusement left her tone. “You changed the rules in this thing. You fell for him.”
“I thought... I mean, we’ve slept together.” When Ellie realized she’d yelled that bit of information, she immediately lowered her voice. “We’ve gone out on these dates. None of it feels fake.”
“Maybe that’s what the two of you need to talk—” Vanessa stopped herself midsentence then leaned in closer. “You’re not confronting this because you’re afraid the relationship didn’t change for him.”
Exactly. That was it. She should clear all this up. But what if the answer was something other than what she wanted it to be? “Maybe I should sell the ring and move to Alaska.”
Vanessa’s eyes bulged. “Wait, is that thing real?”
“He said it was.” Ellie studied it for the fiftieth time. It was stunning. Big. But not too much. A solitaire surrounded by smaller diamonds, and a perfect fit. She didn’t even want to know how he’d pulled that off.
“Damn. Go Derrick.”
Anger or not, the ring made a statement. “Right?”
“I’m going to give you some advice.”
Ellie didn’t hide her groan. “About shoes? That’s about all I can handle right now.”
“You need to end this.”
Her stomach went into free fall. “Did you miss the in love with him part?”
“That’s my point. You guys need a do-over. Start fresh and honest.”
“We’ve been honest with each other.” With a few false starts, they had made a deal. They’d both known, going in, what this was and what it would mean: solving problems for both of them and little more.
Well, damn. Vanessa was right. She was the one who changed the deal.
“Since you’re here and not with him, I think that’s not true.” Ellie started to talk and Vanessa talked over her. “You did storm out, right?”
“I do not storm.”
She rolled her eyes. “I’ve seen you storm.”
“He makes me want to throw things.”
“Not the ring.” Vanessa picked up Ellie’s hand and gave the ring a closer inspection. “You’re keeping that if the knucklehead doesn’t get his act together. I mean, come on.”
“The problem is I want to keep it all—his friends, his house, his brother.” The words ripped out of Ellie. It hurt to admit all of that.
“Oh, man. You have it bad.”
Ellie was starting to realize that. “No kidding.”