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Royal Arrangement #4 by Renna Peak, Ember Casey (6)

Justine

I wish I knew what has come over me. I want nothing to do with the man holding my arm, and yet, I can tell there is something more here. I was so certain that leaving William was the right thing that it caught me off guard having him barge in on my trip with Carter.

Perhaps I should have told him I was leaving. Perhaps storming off before I’d had a chance to tell him goodbye was not the best idea in the world. Or perhaps it was. I’m not sure I can handle the strange mixture of emotions I have when I’m around William. It might not be the worst idea for us to be apart for a time, at least so that I might figure out for myself what it is I’m feeling for him.

But most of me knows that isn’t true at all. A much bigger part of me wants to make things right with my husband. To show him that I might find him exasperating, but that I understand his heart is in the right place. Even though his actions have been more than a little outrageous, I know he means well. And my heart swells at the notion that he cared enough to come after me—that he was willing to fight for me. I know I need to do what I can to fight for him, too.

William is holding tightly to my elbow as he hails us a taxi, almost as though he’s afraid I’m going to go running off into the night if he should let me go.

“Your friend said he was staying at the Hotel Azalea. Surely they’ll have room for the two of us.”

“We could have shared a taxi with him. We would have already been there if you would have stopped at the taxi stand they way he suggested

“I think I know my way around Berlin better than your friend.” William doesn’t even look at me, but I can hear the disgust in his voice.

“Really?” I try to pull my arm from his grasp, but he holds tightly to me, almost as though he’s desperate not to let me go. “How many times have you visited this city?”

He shrugs, still trying to hail a car from the street. “A few.”

“A few?” I shake my head. “You do realize that Carter did a semester abroad here. He knows the city better than

He turns his gaze to mine. “I’m fine. We’re fine.”

“We are not fine, William. We are about as far from fine as two people could be.” I pause for a moment. “I’m not sure what we can do to make this right. I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to convince you…”

He says nothing—if I didn’t know better, I’d say he didn’t hear a word I said.

I shake my head. “Perhaps…” I twist my arm away from his grasp. “I think we should go back inside the station to the taxi stand.”

“What does that have to do with anything?”

“It has to do with me wanting to sleep tonight. I’d prefer not to be standing here all night waiting for a taxi that will never come.” As much as I might want to spend the night with him again, I’m not sure I should let him get that close to me. Even knowing he’s willing to fight for me, there’s still no guarantee that he’ll want me when he finds out the truth. It might be better for me to push him away—neither of us will be hurt if we end things before they really begin.

But the notion of ending our relationship makes my heart ache in a way I never expected.

He rolls his eyes at my comment, though, before he bows deeply, making a sweeping gesture back to the train station. “After you, Princess.”

I sigh as I edge around him, heading back the way we came. Even though he’s being ridiculous, there’s still something here I can’t deny. Something I want to explore further, at least.

He catches up to me quickly. “You know, we could skip the Hotel Azalea altogether and return to Rosvalia. Or we could even go to Montovia if you’d like a short vacation. I’m sure my mother would be happy to see us.”

My heart races for a moment at the thought of running off with him. It might be just what we need to fully connect. But it only takes a moment for my practical side to win over the part of me that finds the thought of a secret rendezvous wholly appealing.

I blow out a long breath. “That sounds suspiciously like an official state visit. And frankly, I’m not up to it. After the week I’ve—we’ve—had, I’m not sure

“It wouldn’t have to be official. It could be a short trip that we wouldn’t have to announce. We could sneak in, if you will. I could show you around our palace, walk you through the gardens. My mother has a lovely greenhouse where tropical plants grow all year long. It isn’t your aviary, but I think you might enjoy

I stop walking and turn to him. “Your Highness…” I shake my head, unsure of what I want to say to him. I want to tell him everything—how my feelings for him have changed. How much I love that he was willing to risk coming after me. How much I care for him.

But then I remember…there are some things I can never share with him, and it makes me wonder if I can do this at all. “I

“Is this Emily person a good friend of yours?” He lifts a brow. “I don’t recall you having said anything about this gallery opening.”

“Because it was the day after the keynote. And if you must know, I wasn’t invited.”

“You…weren’t invited.” He rubs at his chin, grinning. “So, you were planning on crashing her party?”

I groan and turn back toward the train station. “No. Carter asked if I was going, and when he learned that she hadn’t invited me, he offered to take me as his…” I stop before I say the word date, and I turn back to William. “It was supposed to be a distraction.”

“Ah. A distraction. From me, I take it?” He nods, answering his own question as he rubs at his chin. “And that was supposed to help our relationship?”

“We have no relationship, William. We have a marriage neither of us wanted and we have decent sex. That is all.” I start walking again, my stomach twisting with guilt at my words. This isn’t how I want things to be, but I know if I let him get any closer…the only thing I’ll have left is pain.

He catches up to me in a matter of a few steps. “We have more than decent sex, Princess. Even you can admit that.”

My heart flutters a little at the thought of him touching me again, but I shove the feeling away. “It’s fine.”

“Fine? I suppose James Camden was better?” His mouth drops open the second the words are out of his mouth.

I glare at him, forcing myself not to allow my anger at his constant jealousy to bubble to the surface again. “Do you really want to know the answer to that question?”

We’re nearing the entrance to the station again. He takes my hand and pulls me against the building. “I want you to know, I’ve never known anyone like you.”

I roll my eyes, but my heart dances in my chest all the same. “As if I should believe that.”

“It’s true. There’ve been others, of course, but with you… It’s something different.”

I glare at him for a moment until I see the genuineness in his gaze. Something that had felt hard in my chest before softens, and the fluttering in my heart begins again.

But then I realize he’s probably playing me.

I shake my head. “Let’s just go to the hotel. We can check in separately, get separate rooms. I’m certain they can deal with us privately. If we go in a few minutes apart…” As much as I might want to spend the night with him, things will only end badly. I can’t trust myself not to fall head over heels for him—I’m already in too deep. Just the knowledge that I’m having any feelings for him at all is reason enough to stay in separate rooms for the night.

“I’m not not sharing a room with you.” His brows draw together. “Whatever gave you that idea?”

“I told you, I need…” I shake my head again. “I don’t know what I need. But what I do not need is you suffocating me right now. We can check into the hotel. We can get adjoining rooms if you like. But I’m not going to have you in my bed tonight, William. I hope you will respect that.”

He frowns but says nothing. He stares at me for a long moment before he finally nods. “If that is what you wish, Princess.”

“That is what I wish, Your Highness,” I lie. “What I also wish is that you and your sister would just return to Rosvalia or Montovia or—” I pause, looking over my shoulder for no good reason. “Your sister. It won’t look good for her to be seen in public with a stranger. You should go and find her.” I nod, my heart starting to hammer in my chest. “You should warn her

His gaze narrows as he interrupts. “You told me this man was your friend. You told me

“He is my friend. One of my dearest friends.” I shake my head once more. “You don’t understand. The paparazzi here—the photographers. If she

His expression changes in an instant, and he grins at me. “Believe me, of every royal woman I’ve met in my life, my sister is by far the most equipped to deal with the paparazzi.”

“I…” My voice trails off, and I look up into his eyes. “I just

“You’re worried about her.” His grin widens. “You don’t know my sister very well. If anyone can handle themselves with the media, it’s Sophia. As long as this man is as safe as you claim

“I would trust him with my life. He knows my darkest secrets.” My cheeks burn as I realize I’ve said too much.

William cocks his head. “Is that right? What does he know, Princess?”

“Never mind. It doesn’t matter now.” I force a smile. “Do you like gallery openings, Your Highness?”

His gaze narrows a bit. “You will tell me this story.”

“Everyone is entitled to their privacy, are they not? Did you not agree to that?”

He looks skyward before his gaze drops back to mine. “Fine. To answer your question, I don’t enjoy anything more.”

A small laugh escapes me, and I realize it might be the first time I’ve laughed in a long time. “Really? Nothing?”

He shrugs. “What can I say? I’m mad for art.” His brow wrinkles. “Just what sort of art is it? Paintings?”

“The last I heard, it was some sort of combination of sculpture and performance art. But as I said, I wasn’t exactly invited to the opening.”

He pulls my hand into his and lifts it to his lips. “Then let’s skip it.”

“To do what?” I tilt my head, waiting for his answer.

He grins. “Why, to have a date, of course.”

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