- CHAPTER NINE -
COSTELLO
She was beautiful.
I’d had the dress ordered soon after I’d left. My phone had been acting up, so I’d cornered the hotel concierge and told her, quite plainly, that a member of my family was in need of a dress for the wedding. The woman had been quick to figure something out, offering to drive to the nearest boutique and return within the hour.
Watching Scotch joke about her outfit had sent the point home—she needed more than hand-me-down clothes. I’d arranged everything because I refused to miss a step in this charade of ours. It was just another way for me to feel like I had everything under control.
When I saw her in that pale pink dress . . .
I’d forgotten what the word control meant.
It had been a challenge to keep myself from pushing her onto the bed and ignoring the whole damn ceremony. If it had been anyone else’s wedding . . . I might have. But this was Kain, and for my little brother—for my family—I’d do anything.
Or I’d thought I would. Lately I was beginning to wonder.
We exited the hotel and walked along the lit path that ran beside the rustic stables. No money had been spared, and the closer we got to the ceremony’s location, the more obvious that was.
It was a cool evening. Tall metal heaters had been placed on the cedar-chip trail. Pine branches overhead dangled crystals and paper lanterns. But the real beauty waited just across from the barn.
The field was wide, full of bluish-green grass that could survive the snow, and surrounded by a white fence. Winding over the wood were long strings of ivy, lavender, and lilacs. Inside the field were rows of padded gold chairs, the backs thick with wreaths made from pinecones and holly.
And there, waiting in the center beneath an altar of purple roses, were two gorgeous horses, both glowing like pearls under the slowly setting sun. “Wow,” Scotch whispered next to me.
Smiling, I hooked my arm in hers and led her to the chairs. “Sit here.” I motioned. “I need to check on Kain.” My brother was standing by the fence, surrounded by Thorne and the priest they’d brought to officiate.
Scotch’s hand tightened on my elbow. Did she not want me to go? “Got it,” she eventually said, releasing me and parking herself in a chair far away from the rose-petal aisle. “Will you be long?”
I started to answer; Kain’s voice cut me off. “Yo! Costello!” He waved at me with a giant grin.
“Not too long,” I mumbled. “We’ll talk again soon enough. Just wait.”
Her chocolate eyes narrowed with uncertainty. “You’re in the wedding party, is that it?”
I stiffened at her accusation. “How did you . . .”
A coy smile spread on her lips; I ached to kiss it away. “You had to get here before everyone else, that kind of gave it away. Plus, it’s your family. Why wouldn’t you be included in something like this?”
The innocent question sliced through my gut. I was full of splinters, each of them an old, painful reminder of the many times I’d been excluded by my own family. I don’t blame them, I reminded myself. It has to be this way. There were worse things in life than being a martyr.
I couldn’t handle her sweet, pink-cheeked grin. Hot-and-bothered Scotch . . . or pissed-off-at-me Scotch . . . those versions were easier to swallow. Sex and violence weren’t new to me.
Kindness was.
“I need to go.” It came out crisper than the winter wind. Turning around before I could see her reaction, I headed toward Kain and the others.
The ceremony was stunning.
Sammy trailed her mermaid-style gown down the aisle, the long ribbons catching the flower petals and making designs as they ruined the straight path. It made my heart swell to see how overwhelmed my brother was at the sight of his bride.
I stood beside Thorne, the best man. With a flourish he passed the ring to Kain, and we all held our breath as he slid it onto Sammy’s finger. Across from me were Lula and Francesca, Sammy’s bridesmaid and maid of honor, respectively.
Lula had her attention on Sammy. But Fran . . . for a second she looked right at me. Even through her proud tears, she managed to frown. Time didn’t heal all wounds. Sometimes it made them worse.
Everyone cheered as the pair climbed onto their horses—Kain assisting Sammy onto hers when her tight dress gave her trouble. They’d kissed before the rings, they’d kissed after, and they kissed again as they trotted their steeds down the aisle. Along with everyone else, I followed them to where the roses ended.
A path opened in the crowd; I could see Scotch. Like a missile I homed in on her. Gently she swayed toward me, meeting me halfway. It felt intentional, and I ached to believe it was . . . that she wanted to be by my side just as furiously as I needed to be by hers. Our hands dangled, close to touching and never managing to make contact.
That was when I noticed it—her eyes were glistening in the purple haze of oncoming night. She watched as Sammy and Kain kissed again, never breaking her stare. When they stormed off on their horses, she finally glanced up at me. Hastily she rubbed her eyes. “Sorry,” she laughed with a sniffle. “It’s just amazing to see that.”
“See what?” I asked, hardly hearing myself over the cheers around us.
“People in love.” For another second she watched the pair galloping around the field. As if she’d woken from a dream and become conscious of her own vulnerability, she slapped her cheeks and cleared her throat. “Ah! What’s with me? Weddings make everyone cry, don’t they?”
I couldn’t have wanted to dig into her mind and understand what made her tick more than I did right then. “Sure,” I agreed, though I didn’t. I was proud for my brother, but I wasn’t crying. Not like she was—like the love of two strangers could mean so much.
Lifting my head, I scanned the orange-gold grass. I needed to shield my eyes to spot my brother and his new wife circling back our way. They slowed as they approached, just enough to swing their horses together. Kain wrapped his fingers in her hair. He held her solidly, no doubt in his heart as he kissed the woman he loved.
I wondered how that would feel.