After Luke and I got dirty and then thoroughly cleaned, I throw my wet hair up into a messy bun and pull on one of his button-down shirts. There’s only a few in his closet, so I figure he doesn’t wear them much anyway.

“I’m going to let Kozmo and Rosie out,” I call out before heading into the kitchen. The dogs are on my feet in seconds, whimpering to go. “Sorry guys.” I chuckle, feeling my cheeks heat at the thought of what Luke and I have been doing the last twelve hours or so. I’m pleasantly sore between my thighs, another reminder of exactly what Luke and I have been doing. Even though they have no clue, I can’t help the butterflies swarming in my belly at the realization of what all of this now means.

“C’mon,” I say, pulling the door hard against the wind. It’s a complete whiteout, the wind blowing the snow off the roof and trees. Not to mention it’s been snowing and sleeting nonstop. Large icicles hang off the gutters and tree branches. It’s going to take days, if not weeks for the power to come back. The area Luke shoveled out has been snowed over, and Rosie is hesitant to walk out. “Shit.” I pinch my lips together, thinking of how I’m going to convince her to go out there.

I walk to the dryer and pull out my one pair of black leggings and slip them on. Next, I put on my boots, jacket, and hat. The only way Rosie is going to go out in that deep snow is if I take her myself. Once I’m bundled up, I pick Rosie up and clip the leash to her collar. I’m not worried about her running off on me more than losing her in the snow.

“Okay, let’s go. You can’t hold it in that long,” I remind her as if she can understand me. Rosie is much smaller and older than Kozmo and usually needs to go out more often than him.

Walking outside, I watch as Kozmo runs around from one side to the other, completely loving the cold and snow, bouncing through the mounds and snowdrifts. It doesn’t even faze him, which is great normally but then I usually struggle to get him to come back inside.

“Alright, Rosie.” I begin stomping my feet on a patch of snow to flatten it for her as best as I can. All she needs is a little room to go potty and then I can bring her back in. “This should be good enough.”

Setting her down next to my feet, I immediately feel bad as I watch her shiver and look up at me with these pleading eyes. “The sooner you do your business, the sooner we can go back inside by the fire.” I rock back and forth on my heels, trying to stay warm as I wait for her, when a big gush of wind mixed with snow and sleet breezes through and knocks me right over.

“Argh!” I fall back into a snowbank that Luke had formed earlier when he dug out the spot for the dogs. The cold hits me like a ton of bricks, and I immediately try fighting my way out of it. The wind blows more snow, and I can’t see a damn thing.

“Rosie! Kozmo!” I call out, worried they got blown over too. “Luke!” I scream though I doubt he can hear me all the way out here.

I brush off my face and inhale sharply at how cold my hands are. I didn’t put gloves on because I figured I’d be out and in within minutes. The wind picking up and continuously blowing isn’t something I accounted for. It was a whiteout before I came outside, but now I can’t see a damn thing—not even a few inches in front of me.

Once I get back on my feet and shake off the snow, I listen for any movement of the dogs. I call them again, hoping they’ll run in my direction but all I hear is the whistling of the snow.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” I groan loudly, trying to walk through the snowdrifts but the wind is so strong, I have to keep my head down. I have no idea if I’m walking toward the cabin or away from it. “Rosie! Kozmo! Come here!” I squint, trying to see through the blowing snow, but there’s no use with how cloudy it is.

“Kylie!” I hear Luke yell from behind me so now I know I’m going farther away from the cabin.

“Over here!” I turn around and walk toward him, hoping I don’t have far to go.

“Keep talking so I can find you.”

“Okay. I fell from the wind, and I lost Rosie and Kozmo. Once I stood up, I couldn’t see or hear them, and now I’m afraid they’re lost out there somewhere. We have to go look for them.” I’m on the verge of crying as I think about my dogs out here. Kozmo is tougher, actually enjoys this weather, but Rosie isn’t equipped for this shit. She can’t handle being out here for long.

“There’s no visibility, we’ll have to wait,” he shouts, but it sounds much closer this time.

“I can’t leave them out here!” I’m crying now just thinking about having to wait to look for them, big fat fucking tears that will probably freeze to my face.

Luke doesn’t respond because the next second he’s wrapping his arms around me and pulling me up. “Jesus, you’re freezing.” I feel his lips on my nose.

“I should’ve bundled up more, but I didn’t plan on being out here this long,” I explain, feeling guilty that he had to come out in this wind. I try to keep the quiver out of my voice and force myself to stop crying. The last thing I need is for him to see me breaking down. He grabs my ice cold hand and leads us back to the cabin. The moment my face hits the warmth, I sigh in relief, but it’s short lived as I think about my dogs out there helpless.

“I thought you were just letting them go out,” he says, shutting the door behind us and stomping his snow-covered boots on the rug.

“I was, but then I saw the snow drifted over the spot you shoveled, and Rosie couldn’t go out there by herself. So, I carried her outside and stomped down a flat spot, and that’s when the wind picked up and knocked me over. Kozmo was barking, and I think Rosie followed him. I’ve been calling them, but I haven’t heard them in at least ten minutes. I’m worried they’re lost out there.” The expression on his face tells me he can see how panicked I really am, despite me trying to keep myself together. But those dogs are everything to me. They’re family.

Luke doesn’t respond, and by the way he won’t look at me, I know it’s because he’s thinking the same thing. He reaches for my coat and pulls it off me then shakes it off until the snow is now droplets of water. He grabs my hat and boots next until I’m left in my leggings and sweater.

“C’mon, we need to get you into the bath and warm up,” he says, reaching for my hand but I pull it back before he can.

“We can’t leave them out there to freeze to death, Luke,” I cry. “They aren’t familiar with the area to find their way back.” He pinches his lips together, taking my hand and pulling me with him as he walks to the bathroom. “Luke!” I stand firm, planting my feet on the floor. “An animal could get them if the cold doesn’t first.” I don’t hide the fear in my tone because honestly, I’m scared to death that they’re outside alone in this weather right now.

He turns and faces me, his gaze on mine as he cups my cheek. “There’s a wind advisory for the next twenty-four hours. It’s not going to die down anytime soon.”

“They can’t survive out there that long!” I gasp.

“I know.”

Before I can control it, I’m on my knees with my hands over my face, sobbing, not even bothering to try and keep it together anymore. There’s no point when it’s looking hopeless. “Rosie and Kozmo are all that I had for so long. They kept me company and even more—they’re my family. I can’t imagine how scared and cold they are out there while I’m in here.”

“Kylie,” Luke says my name so softly, I almost don’t hear it between my cries. “Please go take a bath and warm up. I’ll find Kozmo and Rosie.”