I’m not even home an hour before I hear the knocking on my door. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know it’s my sister Olivia.
I don’t even bother looking through the peephole. I’m actually more surprised that she knocked and didn’t let herself in with her key because she obviously let herself into the building, officially ambushing me. I swing the door open and she walks in. Not speaking. And I know she is livid.
“Why?” she finally says.
I look at her, not really able to voice my reason. How do you say, I finally had something that was mine? Something that was solely about me, and it turned out it wasn’t. I didn’t want her to ruin it.
“It wasn’t about you, so I didn’t mention it.”
The hurt is evident on her face, her eyes dripping agony. “Does Lynn know?”
“Yes.”
She looks like she might cry.
“I don’t care that you work for him,” she says.
“You don’t?”
“No. I get it. It’s a great job opportunity. My problem is you didn’t tell me. Do you know how much it hurts to know my sister doesn’t trust me?”
“This is why I didn’t tell you. For years it’s been about you. About Lynn. I finally wanted it to be about me,” I say on a broken sob. Tears stream down my cheeks at the admission.
“Bridge.” Olivia’s voice cracks.
“I’m fine.” I wave her off.
“You’re not. You obviously feel a certain way. Talk to me.”
“It’s nothing.” I shake my head, not wanting to answer.
“It’s not nothing. I can see it’s bothering you.”
A tear rolls down my cheek. “I realized I need this for me. Karen gave me no choice, but once I started working, I realized I was good at it. I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want you to ask me to quit. I didn’t want you to take this away from me.”
“I wouldn’t have.”
“I didn’t know that,” I admit.
“This is more than that. This is about trust.”
“I do trust you, Liv. I’ve just lived in your shadow for so long, I wanted to shine for once. On my own, not as your kid sister. I didn’t want to be the consolation prize.”
“What does that even mean?”
“Between you and Lynn, it’s hard to be seen.” I feel awful saying the words. They seem so petty after everything she has been through.
“Why didn’t you tell me you felt this way?”
“You were going through so much, I didn’t want to seem selfish. I didn’t want to burden you.”
At my words, she walks up to me and takes my hand. “You’re my baby sister. You could never be a burden.”
I nod, not wanting to break further.
“So, now it’s out in the open. Sit down and talk to me.” She walks to the couch in my studio, not taking no for an answer.
“I don’t even know where to start.”
“How about the beginning?”
“Can’t I start at the end?” The laughter dies in my throat.
“Nope.”
Thirty minutes later, I’ve told her everything about Karen and my first job. I tell her all about work, leaving out details along the way—big, giant details. I’m not ready for her to yell at me. I’m also not ready to break Grant’s confidence. There’s obviously deep-seated resentment between Grant and Spencer. Telling Olivia means telling Spencer, and that’s not something I’d do. I’d never give him leverage to hurt Grant.
After I’m done, she smiles. “It sounds like this job is perfect for you.”
“It is.”
“I’m happy. Maybe it will turn long-term.” She gives me a reassuring smile, but I know better.
“I’m not too sure about that,” I respond.
“Why not?”
I shrug. “It’s only temporary.” Like my relationship with Grant.
“Maybe he’ll change his mind.”
“He won’t.” The thought breaks my heart, but deep down I know we’re fleeting. Eventually, this will run its course and once again I’ll be alone. I give her a small smile, not wanting to discuss it anymore.
“Maybe.” She looks at her watch. “Oh shit. I didn’t realize the time. I’m meeting Spencer for dinner. Do you want to come?”
Going to dinner with her and Spencer is the last thing I want to do.
“I’m kind of tired from today. I’m going to stay home.”
“You sure?”
“Yeah, but thanks.”
She stands up and places a kiss on my forehead.
Not even an hour passes before I hear my cell phone ring. I can’t find it and frantically search the couch for it. By the third ring I’m sure I’ve missed the call, but when I slip my hand behind the cushion, I’m met with the cold metal. Without even looking I hit the green button.
“Hello?”
“Bridget?”
“Yes?” I pull the phone away and notice a number I don’t recognize. “Who’s calling?”
“It’s Grant.”
Grant. Oh my God! What is Grant doing calling me? Even though we’ve been intimate at the office, I’m shocked to see him calling me. No matter what happened, this is a line we haven’t breached. I’m excited and nervous at the same time.
“Hi,” I murmur. “Is everything okay?” I hear him breathe deeply into the phone and instantly I’m on edge.
“Yeah. I just called to check on you.”
“To check on me?”
“Is that so hard to believe?”
“I’m just surprised.”
“What are you doing?” he asks.
“You’d be bored to tears by my laziness.”
“Nothing you could do would be boring to me.”
My legs feel like jelly. I shouldn’t take his words to heart, but I can’t help it. They weave through me, singeing my insides with excitement.
“What have you been doing that’s so boring?” he presses.
“Honestly? Earlier was anything but boring. Olivia just left.”
“How did that go?”
“It went okay. She’s not angry at me for working for you. She’s angry I didn’t tell her.”
“I’m sorry about you being in the middle of my family drama,” he offers.
“Not your fault.” It really isn’t. I could have told her anytime and avoided the whole mess.
“Are you mad at me? About keeping who I was from you?”
“No. I couldn’t be mad at you.” He stops talking for a minute, and I listen to the sound of him breathing through the phone. “So, back to your current state of boringness.” He chuckles.
“I was about to order Chinese.”
“Do you want company?”
Oh my God! He wants to come here? “I . . . you want to come here?” I ask, puzzled.
“Is that so hard to believe?”
“Kind of. Compared to where you live, my place is a hovel.”
“I’m in a different point of life, Bridget. I wouldn’t expect you to live in some grand place. You just graduated college.”
“It’s just . . . I’m embarrassed by it.”
“Stop. I only want to be with you. We’ve both had a rough day and I don’t really want to go home yet.” His voice is low and full of emotion.
Now that I know a little about him and his life, I understand why he doesn’t want to go home. I’m sure it wasn’t easy for him to see Spencer after all this time and on such poor terms. It can’t be easy knowing his brother is living the good life while his is falling apart.
Jealousy is a wicked thing. I should know. That’s the thing about Grant and me, we’re similar. I understand. That thought makes something inside of me want him here too. If only to comfort him for a while. I want to be that person for him.
“Come over.”
“I’m on my way.” We don’t say goodbye. We both just hang up. I look around my small studio apartment. It won’t be hard to clean, but I’m running out of time. I run around picking things up and stashing them in their typical places. The intercom chimes as I’m fluffing a pillow. With steady steps, I hit the button.
“Hello.”
“It’s me.”
“I’ll buzz you up.”
As I wait for him to knock, butterflies swarm my belly. As much time as we spent together, this will be the first time we do it outside of the office. He’s not my boss. I’m not his employee. We’re just two lonely people seeking solace in each other’s company. I pace; the beat of my heart picking up with every second that passes, and then I hear the knock on the door.
Grant steps into my apartment, his presence too big for my small space. He’s everywhere, he’s everything, he’s all-encompassing as he levels me with his stare. The energy between us crackles.
“Can I get you something to drink?” I ask, suddenly feeling out of place in my own space.
Crossing his arms in front of his torso, he steps forward and looks at me as if I’m the only woman in the world. As if I’m his savior.
“Later, Bridget. First I need to lose myself in you. Forget about everything.” He closes the distance. I take a step backward, my back hitting the wall in the entrance. He leans down, his breath tickling the skin of my jaw. “Will you let me do that?” He trails farther down, his tongue lapping a line as he proceeds. “Will you let me get lost in you?” he mumbles into the crook of my neck. I don’t speak. I can’t. A desperate moan escapes my lips. “Too many clothes.” His hands are pulling at my shirt. Until the button pops open and my breasts are exposed.
“You have too much on too.” I smirk.
My hands roam down his chest until I find the hem, and then I lift it. Once removed, I place a kiss on the hollow of his neck, down his collar, and across his breastbone. Slowly I lower my body to the floor. On to my knees until I’m licking and teasing the V of his hips. I unzip his pants, finding him hard and ready for me. With a swipe of my tongue, I place him in my mouth. Engulfing him in my warmth. I stroke him, lick him, suck, until he’s panting desperately.
“Up,” he orders before picking me up, walking us across the room and then throwing me on the bed. I quickly strip off my clothes as he puts on a condom and then crawls up my body, bracing himself on top of me. He settles in the crook of my hips. Until I feel him tease at my entrance. Slowly, painfully slow, he slides in, joining us, burrowing himself deep inside me. I rock under him as he thrusts inside me.
So deep, my breath hitches in my chest.
He strokes my jaw, lifting my chin so our gazes can meet. His greens eyes bore into me, saying unspoken words I can only dream to hear one day. They tell me how much he cares. How much I mean to him. How much he wants me.
He shows me with each inch of his body, with each thrust of his hips. First slow, then deep. Soon he picks up his pace.
A deep, primal cry starts to form in my mouth, but he silences me with his kiss.
Deep and passionate.
Our hips buck together.
He pulls me closer until there’s no space between our bodies. He begins to move faster than before. Lifting my hips, I match his rhythm.
Fast. Hard. Desperate. Primal.
A storm starts to brew inside me.
One thrust.
Two.
On the third, I come apart. We both do.
His body jerks within me, and an audible breath escapes his clenched jaw. In heavy breaths and pants, moans and gasps, we both succumb. We hold each other, our breaths coming out in tandem.
“Do you want to talk about it?” I finally ask.
“Talk about?”
“Today. With your brother. Do you want to talk about it?”
“Not exactly. I’m over it. Most of his grievances against me are valid. It’s not really him who has me worked up. It’s Chelsea.”
I stiffen at her name.
“I know about you and Chelsea, but I know there’s more, Grant. Will you tell me?”
“Are you sure you want to know?” His eyes seem to turn darker.
“Honestly? I’m not sure. But I feel like I need to know.”
He nods. “I need to tell someone. Sometimes I feel like I’ll explode.”
“Have you ever thought about seeing a professional?” I ask.
“A shrink? No.”
“Well, then, allow me to be your shrink for the day.”
“I’ll try, but I don’t even know where to start.”
“The beginning?” I say and he lets out a deep sigh. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I’ve just never told this to anyone. I’ve never trusted anyone to keep this secret, but I trust you.”
“Tell me.”
“My wife . . .” he says and then clears his throat. “I know I told you pieces of it, but the rest . . . it’s bad. In the beginning, right when her true colors showed, I guess I kept hoping she’d change. Isabella changed everything for me. She’s my everything, but she’s also my one weakness. That fact is easily exploited.”
“I don’t understand why you don’t just leave. Why not take Isabella and leave?”
“Chelsea won’t let me. That’s the thing with her. When she wants something, she gets it. No matter what. For whatever twisted fucking reason, she wants to be married to me. If I left, I’d lose my daughter. That she promised.”
“How can she keep your daughter from you? I guess I just don’t get it.”
“Because she’s not mine,” he yells.
I jump and my jaw drops at his confession. “She’s not yours?”
Grant regards me with sad eyes. Eyes that have been through more pain than I can ever fathom.
“I stay because if I don’t, I’ll lose her. I stay and I do everything I can to protect my daughter. Biologically she isn’t mine, but I’ve raised her. She’s mine and I won’t let Chelsea take her from me.”
“How do you know for sure she isn’t yours?”
“I had a DNA test done when I first suspected. It wasn’t going to change anything for me, but I needed to know how deep Chelsea’s betrayals and lies went.” Sadness fills me to the depth of my soul. The pain he must go through is unimaginable. Once again I’m met with the similarities between my sisters and me. Again I see the people I care about being ripped apart by a selfish woman.
“Does Isabella know?” I ask.
He shakes his head before whispering “No.”
“You have to tell her.”
“I can’t.” He looks so defeated. I want to pull him into my arms and tell him it will all be okay, but I know that keeping this secret from his daughter will hurt her in the future. I know what Lynn went through when she found out her father wasn’t her father, and Isabella has a right to know.
“I know this is hard to hear, but one day you have to tell her. When I was in high school, we found out my father had an affair, which resulted in me having another sister. My family lost years because we never knew the truth.”
“This is different. There is no father. Chelsea won’t tell, ever. Keeping him a secret is too valuable to her. If I tell, I could lose my daughter.” His words sink in and I nod in agreement. There’s nothing more I can say right now, maybe in the future things will be different. Maybe then he will listen and be open to it. But for right now, I’ll just be here for him.
“I’m sorry, Grant.”
“I have no choice right now. I stay for one reason and one reason only. Isabella. I’ve thought about walking away a million times, but I’d sacrifice my own happiness to make sure my daughter is safe. Chelsea isn’t a good mother.”
“You’re a good father. Isabella is lucky to have you.”
“I’m not as good as she deserves. I work long hours and a nanny practically raises her.”
I balk at his comment.
“Stop. Most parents work. You’re doing what needs to be done to provide for Isabella.”
“I need to be there more for her, Bridget, and I’m not.” He huffs.
“You’re a good man, Grant. Give yourself a break. You’re running a multimillion-dollar hotel chain. You’re providing for Isabella’s future. Nobody questions that you’re a good father.”
“How would you know that?”
“Office talk. I hear it all. People genuinely think you’re a good person. Scary, but good.”
“Scary?”
“Totally frightening.”
He chuckles.
“You’re something else, Bridget Miller.” He smiles.
I watch as his smiles fades and his eyes drill into mine. I’m almost afraid of what’s coming next.
“That night, when I saw you standing there, you were the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen. I had a shitty day, and I was so angry, but somehow this stranger in front of me made it all disappear. All the bad of my marriage, my family issues, that fucking day just melted away when I saw you.”
I’m speechless. That’s not at all where I thought the conversation was going. He looked so serious, so brooding. To know that is what he thought when he first saw me is flooring.
“Grant, I-I don’t know what to say.”
“When I kissed you, I didn’t want to stop. I knew you could be my ruin. I had to get away. I should’ve stayed away.”
“I came to you, Grant. I might not have known it that first day, but I did all the same. I have to believe everything happens for a reason. Maybe I was meant to come into your life to help you through this time.”
Grant scoffs. “It’s just the universe fucking with my life a little more. It keeps dangling you in front of me. The fucking forbidden fruit.” His eyes pierce mine. “I want to give you so much more than I can right now. I can’t promise you forever and it’s killing me.”
His words sting, but they aren’t new to me. I know this, and although I don’t truly want to accept it, I have no other choice. I’ll take any sliver Grant Lancaster throws my way, because despite myself, I’ve fallen for him.
“Then promise me right now,” I say.
Right now he’s having a hard time seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. Chelsea has his balls in a vise, twisting and turning every other day. Eventually, she’ll tire of her own games. Women like that never stay happy long. After a while, all this won’t be enough to keep her. I know her kind. Grant can’t see it now, but I can. One day he’ll be free of her, and when that time comes I’ll have my shot. He’s worth waiting for.
I walk over to him and kiss him lightly on the cheek. “Let’s get that Chinese. I’m starving.”
“Anything for my girl.” He gives me an all-American smile and I melt.
It’s all worth it. He’s worth it.