Chapter Twenty-three

Nate wasn't ready to let Hanna go yet. The day was coming to an end, but he wanted to spend more time with her.

They lingered over a leisurely dinner at a steakhouse several towns away. He'd eaten his fill, but a deep hunger still remained.

He wanted Hanna. He wanted her more than he'd ever wanted a woman before. She was like a drug in his veins, both potent and intense, addicting him to her presence.

He took the long way back to the Yellow Rose, following the winding roads he'd been traveling all his life. He didn't need signs to point the way, or stars to guide him. This was home, and he knew these curves as well as he did those of the woman sitting next to him.

He could still remember the smooth texture of her skin, damp and heated from sex. He'd spent hours learning her body, touching her and finding every sweet spot she possessed. It had been his own personal treasure hunt to search for those secret, hidden nerve endings that made her breath hitch when he caressed them with his fingertips or tongue.

He was getting hard just thinking about it, and knew that neither his mind nor his body would rest until he'd had her again.

Warm summer air flowed through the cab of the truck as they meandered through the low mountains. Outside bugs hummed and chirped their mating songs, harmonizing with the throaty croak of frogs nearby. The sky was clear and filled with stars, but none shone half as bright as Hanna's eyes.

She curled her fingers between his, and they held hands like high schoolers out on their first date. And like a high schooler, Nate's blood was running hot, his skin fevered with the need to possess her.

"What's Handshake Rock?" she asked, out of the blue.

The shift in conversation jarred him. "It's this wide, flat plateau on the side of a ridge where you can see for miles. Local legend says that it's the place that two feuding families finally settled their differences, trading three cows for a girl's hand in marriage, all sealed with a handshake."

"Wow. Worth three whole cows. She must have been hot," Hanna said with a wry grin.

Nate felt a grin stretch his face. "Let me guess where you heard about that place. Declan, right?"

"He said you should take me there. How did you know?"

"That's the local make-out spot for kids, and it was his favorite place as a teenager. Though we had another name for it back in school."

"What was that?"

"Hand job Rock."

She let out a musical laugh he knew he'd never tire of hearing. "I'm sure your parents were proud of your wit for coming up with that one."

"Wasn't my idea, though it could have been Declan's. He's got a bit of a dirty mind."

"I doubt that stops any of the ladies from enjoying his company."

"You'd be right on that one. In fact, I think sleeping with him is a rite of passage for far too many local girls."

"Poor baby."

"It's not all it's cracked up to be. He avoided jail time by about three hours once. The girl turned eighteen at midnight, or he would have been charged with statutory rape. Now he checks IDs before he sleeps with anyone, no matter how old she looks."

Hanna shook her head. "I'm surprised the local boys haven't torched his house to get rid of the competition."

Nate knew of more than one tough spot Declan had been in because of his man-whore ways. And while he got plenty of ass, Nate doubted it was worth the trouble.

Sometimes he wondered if Declan didn't agree.

"Let's just say that he's a light sleeper," Nate said.

They were almost back to the Yellow Rose. He found himself easing off the gas and slowing down to savor the last few minutes of their day together.

Hanna stared out of the window, her posture one of complete contentment. "It really is pretty here."

"You sound surprised."

"I wasn't sure at first. I was too worried about getting buried alive to see the allure of so many hills and trees."

He gave her hand a little squeeze. "You're not afraid of me anymore."

She looked at him then, her expression more serious than he'd ever seen it before. "I thought you might hurt me when we first met."

"And now?" he asked, because he detected a deep uncertainty in her tone.

She looked away, refusing to meet his gaze. "You'd never hurt me on purpose any more than I would you. But if I'm being completely honest, it's not going to be easy to leave this place. Or you."

His heart did a funny little dance in his chest. It wasn't entirely comfortable, but there was definitely a hint of excitement mixed in with trepidation.

"You could stay," he said, sounding more like a kid than a grown man. He hadn't meant to let hope fill his voice, because it bordered on desperation, but he wasn't so much of a coward that he couldn't voice his feelings. "I mean, I could certainly use the help on the Yellow Rose. You'd have a place to stay. A job."

And me, he wanted to add, but didn't. That would have crossed some kind of invisible line that would definitely take him from courageous to desperate.

She squeezed his hand and a faint hint of a smile curled one side of her mouth, but not enough for the illusive dimple to show itself. Not a real smile.

"You're sweet to offer. And I'm definitely tempted. But I can't stay."

"Why not?"

"When I left Cincinnati, I promised myself that I was done making bad choices and taking risks. Especially risks that revolved around men." Her shoulders lifted and fell on a heavy sigh. "I've got a bad track record. I've seen my future if I don't turn things around and it's not a pretty sight."

"Your mom?" he guessed.

"And my sister. Neither of them seem to be able to survive without a man. They think that their problems will all be solved if they can just find the right guy to save them." She shook her head. "I can't be like that. I won't. I need to save myself. I need to find my own way in the world. And as much as I would love to stay here and finish the Yellow Rose with you, and maybe even help with the Ophelia, I can't. It's too much of a risk to take that things would go bad between us. What if I pissed you off and you fired me? What if you didn't like my work but were too afraid to tell me so because you didn't want to hurt the feelings of the woman you're sleeping with?"

He wanted to tell her that those things would never happen, but knew that they could. She wasn't a fool. She'd worked with her lover before and it had ended badly. He couldn't fault her for not wanting to make the same mistakes again.

Nate remained silent as he turned into the driveway leading to the Yellow Rose. Broken concrete crunched under his tires. His headlights splashed across the peeling paint of the garage apartment.

Her voice was soft, but with an edge of finality. "These past few days have been some of the best of my life. I'd really like to leave here counting you as one of my few friends."

He wanted more, but knew better than to tell her so. Her path was set, her mind made up. She was the kind of woman he'd always dreamed of—sexy, strong, smart, interested in the same things he was—but she clearly needed more than he had to offer.

Rather than say how he really felt, he simply said, "I'd like that, too."

She gave him the sweetest smile, displaying her single dimple just for him. "Good. We'll start tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?" he asked, confused.

She leaned over the console as her smile turned sultry. "Tonight I want you as more than just a friend."

Excitement swelled in him in a mad rush. His fingers tingled with the need to stroke her skin. His cock came instantly awake, eager to dive back into her hot, slick depths. All his senses heightened until even the splash of his headlights against the garage was too bright, and the sound of his heavy breathing too loud. He could smell her skin, warm and sweet, and his mouth watered for her taste.

"Whatever you want, Hanna," he said. "It's yours."

***

Hanna had to make a conscious effort not to fall in love with Nate right then and there. He was such an easy man to like, and the way he looked at her…she felt like Helen of Troy. Only she had no interest in launching a thousand ships. All she really wanted was Nate's kiss, his touch.

He cupped her face in his big, rough hands and kissed her.

The world turned sideways and did a lazy spinning dive that made her head whirl in response. Her body heated, and that deep, hungry need bloomed once again in her abdomen.

His mouth was smooth but firm, moving over hers slowly at first, but with more urgency as each second passed.

Her breath sped in time with his. Her hands clutched at his shoulders, willing him closer. The damn console stood between them, separating their bodies and robbing her of his hard contours and glorious heat.

She needed him naked. She needed his skin on hers, his hands roaming her body like he owned it. She'd be leaving any day, and if she didn't soak up as much of Nate as she could before she left, she'd spend the rest of her life kicking herself for being such a fool. No way was she wasting this opportunity.

"Inside," she whispered into his mouth. His tongue plunged in to cut off her words, but he understood them anyway.

He pulled away from her mouth and rushed from the truck. Hanna was right on his heels.

She felt empty, and all she could think about was being filled. His tongue, his fingers, his cock…she didn't care as long as he did something to ease the need swelling inside her.

Nate had already opened the apartment door by the time she reached him. She paused for only a moment—long enough to take one more scorching kiss from him—then hurried inside.

She stripped out of her clothes as she made a beeline for the bedroom, where the condoms were. Her shoes, shirt, bra and shorts trailed behind her, littering the tiny living room as she went.

The stitches on her shoulder gave a little yelp of pain with her frantic strip tease, but she didn't care. The other feelings inside of her were so strong they overwhelmed a paltry bit of pain.

So much desire, so much want. She didn't know how she could hold it all. Already her skin was flushed and hot, her pussy slick and eager.

Nate caught her as she reached the night stand and pulled out the last of the condoms. He wrapped his muscular arms around her body and pulled her back against his bare chest.

Everything inside of her celebrated that skin-on-skin contact. His heat, his hard strength, the smoothness of his skin and the slight roughness of his hair…it all melded together into a symphony of textures that made her soul want to sing.

A deep shiver shook her spine as she arched her body back to press them more firmly together. With one of his arms around her waist and another angled between her breasts to caress her throat, she felt completely surrounded by him and utterly protected.

No other man had ever made her feel so safe, and in the back of her mind she wondered just how much of a risk she was taking by trusting him like this.

Hanna leaned her head back on his shoulder and reached back to grip his hard thighs. She wanted to strip off his jeans to access his cock, but Nate had other plans.

He pressed her forward until her hands hit the mattress. Wearing nothing but her panties, she felt exposed like this, but even that gave her a shiver of naughty delight.

He leaned over her, pressing wet kisses along her spine from the nape of her neck, all the way down to the small of her back. His fingers slipped beneath her panties and within seconds, the last remaining clothing she wore was gone.

Then so was he.

She looked over her shoulder to see what he was doing, and the sight that greeted her was so deeply erotic, it made her tremble.

Nate's face was tight with lust. The muscles of his chest and abs were clenched and bulging. He's shoved his jeans down, and was rolling a condom over his thick erection. The dark head appeared from his fist as he finished sheathing himself. Even his fingers weren't long enough to close around his cock, and while she knew how well they fit together, she couldn't help but marvel over how much of him she'd been able to take.

And was dying to do so again.

He gave her a dark look that only served to make him even sexier—something she would have said was impossible only seconds ago.

"Spread your legs." He uttered the command in a low rumble that vibrated her spine.

Hanna shivered, then did as he asked, widening her stance.

He splayed one hand between her shoulder blades and pushed until her face was pressed against the mattress.

Air swirled between her thighs, cooling the slick heat gathering along her labia. An instant later, she felt his fingers glide over her pussy as if testing her readiness. He let out a deep rumble of satisfaction, and then his fingers disappeared, only to be replaced by the wide tip of his cock.

Anticipation flooded her, bringing with it a hot rush of lube from her core. She'd never wanted anything more than she wanted him to fuck her. Fill her. Claim her.

A moment of pressure, then her body opened for him, greeting him with a hot, wet grip and a sharp cry of pleasure.

The emptiness was gone, replaced by an intense fullness she'd never known before Nate. And it wasn't just her body that was full, her mind was overflowing with celebration and a riot of emotions too rare and scary to name. This was just a physical act, but there was a kind of magic in it that turned nothing into something.

Where there had never before been feelings, she was now overwhelmed. Physical sensations mixed with thought and emotion, knotting into a tight ball she knew she'd never again be able to unravel.

As Nate moved, gliding his erection in and out of her body, she felt herself tumble. Not just toward orgasm, but also toward something more. Something big. Something terrifying.

She was going to love him.

She didn't want to. She couldn't afford to take that kind of risk—the biggest risk—but there was no way to stop it now. She was already rushing headlong into a dark, unknown space she'd never before seen, and there was no way to stop herself.

She wasn't even sure that she wanted to.

Her body coiled around the knot of pleasure he'd created. She grew tighter and tighter, panting and gasping in an effort to survive the pressure. And then in an instant, her world exploded in a burst of color and sound, sensation and light. As the intense physical joy of her climax consumed her, she let go and gave into the power it held over her.

Distantly, she was aware of Nate's roar of completion and the deep throb of his semen inside her. Like everything else about him, his orgasm was big and powerful, sweeping her even higher inside her own pleasure.

Slowly the world came back. She was aware of the mattress under her cheek and the bunched up covers in her fists. She was breathing too hard, and her whole body was trembling. Whether from lack of oxygen or from the sheer impact of her orgasm, she wasn't sure, but her world had definitely been rocked.

Nate pulled his erection from her body, then guided them both to the bed in a panting heap. He cradled her, curling around her in a naturally protective gesture.

Tears slid from the corners of her eyes to wet the covers below her cheeks. She hadn't meant to cry. She hadn't even realized that she was until the tears had begun to cool. But now that she did, she knew instantly why.

This was the last time she'd ever be with Nate like this—the last time he'd ever hold her as they drifted to sleep. The last time she'd ever allow herself to wake up in his arms.

Because if she did any of this again, she'd never be able to leave him. And if she didn't leave, she'd end up just like her mother.

Eventually Nate would realize that he was too good for her. He'd figure out that his mother was right and that Hanna was the loser in this relationship. As soon as that happened, he'd dump her or resent her.

By that time, she was sure that it would be too late for her to save herself. She'd be head-over-heels for the man.

He was kind, generous, sexy, skilled and liked the same things she did. What sane woman wouldn't fall in love with him?

And then where would she be? Living in a town where she knew no one, depending on a man for a job and a place to live, unable to make it on her own.

Just like Mom.

No. Hanna couldn't do that to herself. Nate was a great man and a fun fling, but that was all he could be. He was not the answer to all her problems.

That, she would find on her own, or die trying.

She scrubbed her tears away, being careful not to let him see she'd been crying. She didn't want to ruin tonight with tears.

This was their last night together like this, and she was going to savor it.