Londyn
I didn’t want to go back.
Everything about the city - everything about being with Chance - had me dreading the drive home in the morning since that meant going back to the same ol’ thing. And while I knew I’d at least have Chance around for a little while longer with him helping out his mother, I also knew our relationship in our hometown would probably look nothing like the one we had developed here.
Here, we could just be us. Go places without running into familiar faces, do cute, couple shit in public without people snooping on us and reporting back, have a variety of fun since the city gave us so many more options than what we had back home. And though I may not have necessarily been looking for it when I came, the energy of the city was something I had been longing for from the very beginning - well before moving to the city even included Chance.
Of course the inclusion of Chance made it that much more enticing, our agreement to really be together turning him into an even more perfect version of himself. I mean, he had always been a gentleman. But now he was acting, well, like a boyfriend; doing the silliest, sweetest things that only made me love him more.
Wait what?
Before I could come back to my thought, I felt Chance’s arms wrapped around my waist on his return from the bathroom, his teeth nipping at my ear before he asked, “What you over here thinking so hard about?”
I let my hands settle on top of his as I stared out onto the sight in front of us, a diverse crowd of people dancing to the live cover band set-up in the middle of the park. It was an event we had stumbled upon on our walk back from the soul food joint that I would probably eat at every day if I lived here. But since I didn’t, I could only dream as I answered, “Just how much I love it here. In this city. It’s so… vibrant. So refreshing.”
“Nothing like back home, huh?” he asked right against my ear, beginning to sway us side-to-side as the band started playing a cover of some slow song I couldn’t put my finger on right away though it sounded way too familiar.
As I waited for the lead singer to get to the lyrics so I could finally solve the mystery, I replied, “Home can just be so draining sometimes. But here, I feel so... full. So inspired.
I could feel Chance nodding when he agreed, “I know what you mean. Being away from my mom is tough, but that feeling you’re talking about is what’s kept me here for all these years.”
“Should’ve taken me with you the first time you left,” I teased, getting more into our groove once I realized the song was Cupid by 112.
“How fitting,” I thought with a grin that only grew wider when Chance replied, “Hell nah. You were really a baby back then.”
I turned around in his hold, wrapping my arms around his neck to gush, “Yeah, and now I’m your baby.”
“Damn right,” he agreed with a smirk, reaching past my waist to grab a handful of my ass.
I could only giggle, enjoying the feel of his thick fingers digging through the fabric of my dress when I asked, “You sure you wanna go back? I mean, your mom is in good hands with mine. I’m obviously in good hands with you. I really don’t see the point of interrupting two good things.”
“Yeah, besides work on Monday for the both of us,” he replied, even that not sounding worth the trouble of returning so soon.
But considering the check involved equated to a roof over my head, I had to agree, “You’re right. I still can’t wait to come back though.”
“And you’ll always have a place to stay when you do,” he insisted, bending his neck so that his forehead was pressed against mine before meeting my lips for a kiss that only made the moment feel even more magical.
In fact, it felt so magical that I knew I would’ve hated myself for not capturing any of it to look back on later. So instead of having regrets, I reached in my wristlet to grab my phone, turning back around in Chance’s hold before opening the camera app and snapping a few pictures of us.
“I can’t even fake. We look good as hell together,” Chance said, watching over my shoulder as I scrolled through the pictures I had taken. And when I landed on the one of him with his face tucked into the crook of my neck and me cheesing like a child in response, my heart literally fluttered.
“Okay, this is way too cute not to post,” I told him, exiting out of the camera so that I could access my Instagram.
“I thought you wanted to talk to Eric first,” Chance reminded me as I settled on a filter that made our melanin pop the best before moving onto the caption.
With my fingers hovering over the screen, I answered, “I do. But he’s been blocked on here for months since I couldn’t get my thirst traps off without him going in on me in the comments.”
Chance only chuckled, reaching to take my phone from my hand since he could see I was struggling with what to say. And once I saw what he put, I was a little jealous that I hadn’t thought of it first since it was so simple, yet so perfectly fitting.
New Beginnings.
He was the one to press share before handing it back to me and insisting, “All your little hoes about to be real mad at you for that one.”
“A playa has to turn in her card eventually, right?” I asked teasingly, making him chuckle as his phone began to ring. And while my eyes naturally shot to the screen out of pure nosiness once he pulled it from his pocket, panic settled in when I saw whose name was on it.
Eazy E.
Chance wasn’t nearly as fazed, sounding completely normal when he answered, “What’s good, E?”
Since we were standing so close, I could hear my brother reply, “Yo, what’s good? You tryna hit the strip with me and M.J. tonight?”
His face was etched with amusement when he peeked down at me and answered, “Nah, I’m actually back home for the weekend. Had to re-up on my gear since I’m extending my stay.”
“Ahh I feel you. Well hit me when you get back so we can link.”
“Aight bet,” Chance told him before ending the call, my shoulders dropping with relief until my phone started ringing with a call from the same person.
“What does he want,” I thought, answering with a stale, “Yes, Eric?”
“Get dressed, LoLo. Me and M.J. need a designated driver.”
“First of all, can I get a hello? Maybe even a, how are you?” I asked, rolling my eyes as Chance gave a quiet chuckle.
Of course Eric didn’t honor my request, brushing me off with a, “Anyway… you coming or what?”
“I… can’t. I’m swamped with work,” I told him, my eyes going wide at Chance while he offered a shrug.
“Man, push them little characters or whatever you’re working on to the side and hit the strip with your big bro for a change. It’s been a minute since we went out together.”
“And it’s going to have to be a minute longer. I really can’t tonight, E,” I practically whined, knowing there was more to the story than he realized.
But since he had no idea what was going on, he forced his hand. “So I’m dragging you outta your house or your office?”
“I’m not at either so…”
“Well where you at then?” he asked, the question making me peek at Chance again for answers.
He only smirked, leaving me to come up with something on my own. “Uh… business trip.”
I could hear the disbelief in his voice when he repeated, “Business trip? Since when do you go on business trips?”
“Since now, fool! Obviously,” I replied, hoping it made my little act more convincing.
Either way, it was enough to at least get him off the phone once he said, “Yeah aight. Guess I’ll see you when you get back then,” before hanging up, not even giving me a chance to say goodbye.
I wasn’t going to sweat it, too focused on Chance’s arms wrapped back around me the second I put my phone away. And I couldn’t help but grin once I heard him tease, “If you’re tellin’ people you’re on a business trip, I’m about to put you to work.”
“Oh yeah? How so?” I asked, ready for any and every task he wanted to throw my way even if it meant leaving the park to go back to his place.
I was all eyes and ears when Chance licked his lips before he answered, “Well for starters, I’ma need you to put that ass on me one good time to this fine music out here. Let me see if those hips can move as good to music as they do in bed.”
“Okay, and then what?” I asked, grinning from ear-to-ear as I absorbed everything about the moment.
The weather, the music, the environment, the… him.
I could already see the mischief developing in his eyes when he added, “Then I want you to walk back to the crib with me, a few steps in front though so I can watch that ass the whole way home.”
This time, I laughed and agreed, “Deal. Anything else?”
He pulled me a little tighter as he nodded to reply, “Yeah. I’ma need you to show me what that mouth do again. In the name of business.”
I immediately burst out laughing, slapping a hand across his chest. “I’m gonna have lockjaw messing around with you.”
He only shrugged, planting a kiss on my nose before he said, “Shouldn’t be so good at what you do if you don’t want me to love it so much.”
Then he gave me another kiss on the nose that had me blushing like crazy when I teasingly asked, “I am good, huh?”
“The greatest.”
With how good of a mood he had me in, I planned on checking off every single task on his little list. Dancing the night away, giving him a little show on the walk home, then driving him crazy enough with my head game to earn myself another wild offer; his last name.
Since I knew it was all in fun - better have been all in fun -, I took it in stride, curling up and falling asleep in his arms for the final time in his bed before we took off for home first thing in the morning. And even the drive back was fulfilling, packed with plenty of laughs that I would forever hold dear to my heart. But I quickly learned I would need every good vibe, every memory, every ounce of positive energy I had gained from spending time with Chance to deal with the person sitting on my porch when we arrived.
“Aww shit,” Chance groaned the second he, too, noticed who it was. And while I didn’t want to out myself right away, it didn’t take long for me to realize Eric was already well-versed on everything I had been trying to keep a secret when he approached Chance with a vengeance the second he stepped out of the car.
“You ain’t think I was gonna find out you were fuckin’ around with my little sister, nigga?” he growled, shoving Chance in the chest without really making him budge.
While Chance remained calm, I was far from it when I stepped between them and barked, “Eric, will you chill out?!”
“Nah, fuck that!” he yelled, turning back towards Chance with his phone - our picture - in his hand. “Your ass is like family to me, man! And you wanna go behind my back and do this shit?”
Before Chance could respond, I asked Eric, “How did you even see this? I thought I had you blocked.”
While I shouldn’t have been surprised that technology had failed me, his anger turned more sarcastic when he replied, “Screenshots are a bitch, right?”
“Yes. Yes, they are,” I answered in my head, watching as Eric returned his attention to Chance with a stiff finger pointed. “Now back to your bitch ass…”
You would’ve thought Chance had been preparing for this moment his entire life with how calm he remained, though it was clear I wasn’t prepared at all since I was trying to interfere once again when I shouted, “Eric, stop it! I can explain.”
“Yeah, I bet you can. Wanna lie to me talkin’ about you’re on a business trip and shit when you’re really holed up with this nigga. How long y’all been sneaking around, huh?” he asked, his anger rightfully directed at me since I was the one so hell-bent on keeping it from him.
For whatever reason, it was that that got Chance talking, stepping up to answer, “Since I’ve been in town. And ain’t shit you can do about that, bruh.”
Oh damn.
I was honestly a little embarrassed by how hot his response made me, his assertiveness enough to make me shiver, though Eric wasn’t nearly as impressed. “Wow. So all those times you were too busy to hang, you were really with her? All those times your ass was trotting around here glowing and shit, tryna play humble about what moves you were making, it was because of my fuckin’ little sister? That’s some snake shit, man.”
“Snake shit” felt like an exaggeration, but it wasn’t my bro-code to interfere with. So I remained quiet, letting Chance do the talking when he expressed, “Look, E. I understand this being a surprise to you, but it is what it is. Londyn and I are a couple now, and…”
He couldn’t even finish before Eric interjected, “A couple? A couple?!”
His dramatics were enough for me to step in and answer, “Yes, a couple. Why is that so hard for you to comprehend?”
I could literally see him seething. But now that it was all out in the open, and now that Chance and I were hitting him with a united front, he could only growl, “Man, fuck the both of y’all,” before storming off towards his car that I hadn’t even noticed when we pulled up.
Maybe I would’ve been better prepared if I had.
“Well… I guess the cats out of the bag now,” Chance announced as we watched Eric peel off down the street, his high speed another reflection of how mad he really was. And while I had rightfully assumed he wouldn’t be too ecstatic about something like this catching him off-guard, I was still shocked that he had gone to this extent of expressing it.
“I can’t believe he really reacted like that.”
Chance shrugged, back to his calm self when he insisted, “You know how he is, LoLo. Gets himself all hyped up for no good reason. He’ll come around though. I mean, I may not be his first pick, but I ain’t that damn bad.”
Even if the moment didn’t call for it, I couldn’t help the laugh that slipped from my lips in response. And since there was no way in hell I was letting Eric get in the way of my something good, I told Chance, “He doesn’t have a choice.”
Chance seemed glad to hear it, moving to finally grab my bag from the backseat. “I guess I understand why you wanted to keep things a secret now.”
“Right? I mean, that’s like fifteen plus years of friendship down the drain for nothing,” I told him, already feeling guilty about busting up their little brotherhood.
But Chance didn’t exactly see things the same way that I did, carrying my bag into the house while insisting, “Nah, we’ll be straight. Eventually.”
The uncertainty in that “eventually” was enough to make me feel even worse about it, letting us in the house and giving an apology all at once. “I’m sorry, Chance. I should’ve just told him the truth from the beginning. All of this could’ve been avoided.”
Once again, Chance didn’t quite agree, quick to suggest, “Nah, you did the right thing by waiting until we were on solid ground before letting him know. Cause if I would’ve been on some fuck shit after he found out, it probably would’ve been a lot worse. And even though he’s pissed right now, he’s still your family which means he can’t stay away from you forever.”
It sounded good. But I also knew my brother well enough to not be as convinced as Chance when I replied, “I sure hope not.”
Instead of discussing it any further, Chance just let it be, getting me settled in before announcing, “I hate to leave you here by yourself, but I told moms I’d swing by the second I got back.”
“No, I understand. Go ahead. I’ll be alright,” I told him with a wave of my hand, knowing this situation required a venting session with another, non-involved party anyway.
Chance knew it too, smirking when he asked, “Getting ready to call up ol’ boy, huh?”
“Already dialing,” I replied with a half-hearted smirk of my own, grateful to see him being understanding as opposed to the annoyance that usually came with anything that involved Khalid. But it was a testament to how much we had grown since then, especially once he gave me a goodbye kiss that helped to release any and all tension I had worked up over my big brother.
Still, I knew it was something I needed to talk through while it was still fresh. And the second Chance left to see about his mother, I got on my phone to make late lunch plans with my best friend.
&
“Who do you think would’ve won the fight though? Be honest.”
I rolled my eyes, picking around at the salad that should’ve been a cheeseburger. “Seriously, Khalid. Out of everything I’ve just told you, that’s what you care about? Who would’ve won the hypothetical fight between my brother and my boyfriend?”
The word “boyfriend” honestly felt a little weird coming out of my mouth. And Khalid picked up on it too, chewing through a handful of fries as he replied, “Damn. I ain’t heard you claim a nigga like that in a long time. Chance must be the real deal.”
My sigh was borderline dreamy as I dropped my fork to emphasize, “He really, really is. And I know I was the one making a big deal about not taking it there with him. But now that we’ve arrived, it’s like… magic.”
“Your ass is in love,” Khalid replied with a laugh, the word making me cringe since it felt way too soon to be anything of that nature. But it did feel incredible, and gave me butterflies to think about. And the fact that now I couldn’t stop smiling had me wondering if Khalid was onto something.
I refused to give him the credit, cutting my daydream short to snap, “Don’t drag it. I’m just really happy, which only makes it suck even more that Eric isn’t happy for us.”
While my relationship with Chance didn’t necessarily require Eric’s approval, it still would’ve been nice to have since the two were so close. Though Khalid saw things differently when he explained, “It’s not that he’s not happy for you. He’s just salty about finding out from someone else before hearing it from y’all. Salty about… not being in the know since he’s been around y’all multiple times without having a clue because y’all were good as hell at hiding that shit.”
“Which I get. But how long does it take for the saltiness to turn into happiness?” I asked, ready to expedite the process so I could get back to basking in everything Chance.
But it didn’t seem as if the solution was coming as soon as I would’ve liked when Khalid shrugged to answer, “Case to case basis, LoLo. But don’t worry. He’ll come around.”
“Chance said the… wait, is that who I think it is?”
My eyes were zeroed in on the man I wished I saw more often as he found an open seat in the bar area before motioning to the waitress for a menu. And while his eyes immediately began to scan the options, Khalid joined me in my watch to answer, “Hell yeah, that’s him. Still rocking that fresh outta jail buffness like he ain’t been free for years.”
I tossed a hand his way before telling him I’d be back. Then I made my way over to where the man was sitting, not even tapping him on the shoulder before I asked, “Daddy, what are you doing here?”
He turned around to see it was me, his scowl turning into a grin I hadn’t seen in far too long when he replied, “Trying to get a meal just like you are, little girl. Now are you gonna keep asking questions or are you gonna show your ol’ man some love?”
Without wasting a second, I slipped into his arms for a hug, glad to see he had gotten better at giving them since the last time I saw him; almost as if the cold heart he had developed in prison was finally beginning to thaw. But even if he had warmed up, that didn’t stop him from scolding, “This city ain’t big enough for me to not have seen your behind in so long. You been hiding from me?”
I shook my head. “No. Just been working, I guess.”
“You guess? Work isn’t treating you as well as it used to?” he asked, his eyebrow piqued as if he was already ready to handle any problems I was having for me.
But since I knew that meant trouble, I did my best to put him at ease when I explained, “No, it’s not that. Just been thinking about doing something different, or maybe taking my talents to another city.”
That idea was another reason I wanted to go to lunch with Khalid, to get his perspective on something that had been itching at me since I got back. But my dad wasn’t even a little bit sold, his face scrunching as he repeated, “Another city? What little nigga you chasin’ after?”
I quickly brushed him off, my voice more of a squeal when I giggled and defended, “It’s not about a guy, Daddy. I mean, he’s there too, but… this is about me.”
Making a power move had been on my mind for a long time, particularly one that included blowing this city for good to do my own thing. And it just so happened that Chance’s location provided me an out; a bridge to assist me on my way to the place I wanted to be all along even if I had just learned about it this past weekend.
While I could only imagine my mother’s over-dramatic reaction to even the mention of me moving, I was glad to have my father’s vote of confidence once he groaned, “Mmhmm. Well I know you’ll figure it out. You’re a smart woman. My little college graduate.”
With that, I could only smile, turning the spotlight on him when I asked, “You’ve been okay though? Still working with that landscaping company?”
“You’d know if you called more often,” he replied with a half-hearted smirk. One that made me feel a little guilty as he continued, “But yeah, I’m still there. Being run into the ground by the white man.”
“I thought you liked your boss?”
He shrugged, sipping from the water the waitress had just delivered. “He’s decent. Nice guy on the outside, but looks like the type who calls me “boy” in his head just because I have a record.”
The same way he had been ready to solve my work problems for me was the same way I felt now, fired up that someone would judge him in that way because of his past. But I didn’t get a chance to throw out any real solutions before he was already moving on from it, turning the spotlight back my way when he said, “Anyway. You have a birthday coming, huh? The big two-six. Where does the time go?”
“There is nothing big about turning twenty-six, Daddy. But you know your baby mama has to put together an extravagant party for everything,” I replied with a roll of my eyes, the fact that my mother still took it upon herself to throw me a birthday party every year both a gift and a curse.
A gift because it gave her a reason to do her favorite thing; plan a party
A curse because it gave her a reason to get on my nerves with the details when I would’ve much rather just had a small, intimate dinner.
The mention of my mother made him sit up a little straighter, an undeniable grin on his face as he said, “I saw her little video. She’s still got it.”
“Eww, Daddy. I don’t wanna hear all that,” I whined, smacking a hand against the thick muscle he had definitely kept intact since being locked up.
He held nothing back when he challenged, “How you think we ended up with you? That woman has always known how to entice a man.”
Instead of gagging at the thought, I moved right along the same way he had earlier. “Anyway…. You should come. To the party. It’ll be nice to have you around.”
Now that he seemed to be in a better mental space, I figured it would be good to remind him he had more family than just my grandmother. And honestly, I wanted him to be able to enjoy himself again, wanted to see more of the light that finally seemed to be coming back to his eyes.
While the grin appeared a little strain, I was still glad to hear him answer, “If you want me there, I’ll be there. Just send me the details.”
“I will. It was good seeing you,” I told him, pulling him into a hug and doing most of the work to squeeze him tight since I finally felt confident it would be well received.
But even though he was accepting of my love, that didn’t stop him from scolding, “Just don’t let it be too long until the next time, you hear me?”
I nodded once I pulled away, getting ready to head back to my table until he said, “Londyn, please don’t tell me that’s the little nigga who’s got you ready to skip town?”
His eyes were in the general direction of where I had come from, allowing me to respond, “Who, Khalid? No, he’s just a friend.”
“Good. He looks like he still has some growing to do. Gotta get a little more hair on his chest first or somethin’. Or maybe he’s just too damn skinny to really protect my baby girl,” he listed, all things that made me laugh since I knew I’d probably be teasing Khalid about the same things later.
But for now, I could only tell my father, “Whatever, Daddy. I’ll be in touch.”
“Looking forward to it, baby girl,” he replied with another smile, going back to his business while I made my way back to our table.
The second I sat down, Khalid leaned in to whisper, “Man, how’d your dad get me that spooked from far away? Did you see how he was looking at me?”
I laughed, thinking about the shady spiel he had just given about him while telling Khalid, “He was just sizing you up. Thought you were my man.”
“Eww, why would I do that?” Khalid asked with a look of disgust, waiting for me to toss a hand at him before he broke into a laugh.
Even if he thought it was funny, I was still quick to squeal, “Don’t be that way! I’m a catch, damnit.”
He nodded to agree. “You are. And Chance hooked, lined, and sinkered your ass.”
Anything other than, “Damn right” would’ve been a lie since Chance had definitely done all of the above. But it was a place I was happy to be in, though I still gave Khalid a stare that rivaled my father’s when I groaned, “Eat your food.”