Natalie,

 

I’ve been thinking about you these last few weeks. I still can’t believe it’s been eight months since—

 

The lid of my laptop snapped shut before I read the rest of the email. I hunched over my desk and bit my nails into my palms.

Ben reached out. I couldn’t believe it. At first, I felt a wild happiness, but a tidal wave of nerves drowned it.

I’m starting to move on.

I flicked away a crumb. Then came the rage.

I didn’t want to finish the email. Not yet.

Laughter sounded from the living room. A pair of voices talked loudly as they walked into our apartment. They must be back from dinner.

Resigning myself to an evening of watching Luke and Jessica fawn over each other, I got up from my chair and joined them.

“Hey!”

Jessica’s blonde ponytail whipped around. Luke stood in the kitchen, uncorking wine. I always wondered what he thought when he visited. I wondered if he couldn’t wait to get away. To return to his mansion. Maybe he found our peasant life charming.

“Hello, Luke.”

“How was your date?” Jessica grinned at me.

Let me see.

After I had calmed down, I realized how embarrassing it had been. It was a complete disaster. A date with a stranger turned into an interview with Will, and somehow I had a meltdown.

“Um, well—it was interrupted by Will.”

“Will who?”

“Your cousin.”

Luke’s face darkened. “What?”

“He showed up and paid Charlie to leave the table.” A burst of laughter left my throat at both of their expressions. I summoned the energy to walk to the kitchen table and clutched one chair. The fact that I left the date almost in tears seemed kind of hilarious.

Jessica made a wordless “wow,” but Luke looked like his temple was about to explode.

“I don’t know how he found me,” I shrugged, looking at Luke.

For a moment, I thought he would smash the wine bottle. "I'm sorry, Natalie," he apologized, red-faced. "He kept hassling me for your number, and I told him you were going on a date with someone else."

That he had the nerve to harass Luke at work made me smile. “Don’t apologize,” I said, sobering. “It wasn’t so bad.”

I didn’t tell them about the job offer or the interview. I wanted to take that secret to my grave, but I couldn’t forget how he made me feel, how he seemed to understand what I was going through.

“He seems like a nice person.”

But Luke was shaking his head, looking furious with himself. “Natalie, there is a lot of things you don’t know about him. He’s not a nice guy. He’s a huge mess. A couple years ago, he—” He colored and suddenly fell silent.

“He what?” I prompted.

“I really shouldn’t say. It’s not for me to tell you. But, just believe me—he has a host of issues you don’t want to deal with.”

My lungs froze. What did it matter, really?

I’ll probably never see him again.

I sat down at the kitchen table, Luke avoiding my eyes.

“Why shouldn’t she give him a chance? You gave me one.”

His gaze cut at her. “Don’t—it’s not the same at all.”

But his girlfriend would not let him off that easily. “How is it not the same?”

A pin could have dropped in the kitchen, and I would have heard it. Luke's mouth faltered.

“I can’t. It’s not my place. I’m sure he’ll tell you eventually.”

Well, now I have to know.

“And when he does, Natalie can decide for herself if she wants to date him.”

“I don’t even want to see him again.”

Luke blew out his cheeks, looking relieved. “Don’t Google his name, Natalie. I’m serious. Even if it’s unlikely you’ll see him again.”

Jessica swatted his arm. "How is she supposed to stop herself from doing that? Don't put ideas in her head."

She squealed as he suddenly pulled her onto his lap and kissed her cheek. A flutter of awkwardness swept my insides. I always felt like I was walking in on something private around them.

"How is it on that side of the family? He mentioned that he was in the race to be CEO."

With Jessica in his arms, he gave a derisive laugh. “I will be really, really surprised if he gets it. He’s a loose cannon.”

Considering how disrespectful Will was when he talked about Luke, I couldn’t exactly muster the energy to be angry on Will’s behalf. I could detect a faint note of bitterness coming from Luke’s voice. Was he upset that his father’s death ruled him out of the hierarchy of the company?

“I could see things getting ugly between all of them when Uncle Dominic resigns. Did you know that he tried to sell my share of the company without my knowledge?”

“What?” I hissed as I looked at Jessica’s grim face. “Are you serious?”

“Yeah. He controls all the trusts, and he wanted to sell all the shares. I’m in the middle of a lawsuit with him, actually,” his voice trembled.

What a horrible family.

“I’m sorry.”

“Ah, don’t be. Once this is over, I’m cutting off ties with all of them.”

I spent the rest of the evening boiling over everything Luke said—or hadn't said. The unread email smoldered in my mind, and I knew that I wouldn't be able to stop myself from reading it when I went to bed. My mind burned all night. What was the horrible thing William had done? I wished Luke hadn't mentioned it.

Kicking the chair back from my desk, I sank down and reopened the laptop.

 

—We broke up. Can we please talk? I really need to get things off my chest. Maybe we could for lunch? I could meet you at Embarcadero Station. Please, Natalie. Call me.

-Ben

 

A flurry of emotions whirled inside me like a snowstorm. My finger tapped on the reply button and hovered hesitantly over the keys.

I needed to see him one more time to find out if I was okay with moving on.

* * *

I had a job offer already, and I had to meet the client in the city. Today.

“Who is it?”

The recruiting agent spoke quickly. “The client has requested anonymity for now.”

I was also meeting Ben in the city—I caved and sent him an email.

“Believe me,” she continued, “you want to go to this interview. This is a very competitive salary for a client who is—well, just get here.”

Intrigued, I agreed to meet whoever it was at eleven at the client’s location. I patted myself on the back for finding a job. I was meeting Ben later at one, so this might work out perfectly.

I walked outside and headed for the metro. My heels stumbled over the cracks in the pavement near the BART station, and I almost twisted my ankle.

Fuck. I really need to move from this place.

I only tolerated living here because of Jessica. She was my best friend. She was broke. I had to do what I could to help her out, and there were many months where I paid for her half of the rent. Those days were over, though. Jessica paid me back every cent she ever owed me—plus interest. The lease was coming up soon and I had no idea what would happen. Would she move in with Luke?

It struck like a gong inside me. I wanted to cling onto my best friend, but we were both growing up.

Growing up or growing apart?

The metro screamed toward me, the cacophony of screeching metal making my teeth grind. I moved into the warm car and took a seat in the back.

My nerves were on high alert the whole way into the city. It’s been so long since I had an interview. I walked with some difficulty toward Union Square after leaving the BART, surrounded by hordes of tourists shopping at all the clothing stores. I opened the white doors to Cliff Graphic Design and approached the desk, my already tired legs shaking.

“Good morning.”

The receptionist gave me a friendly smile, which I returned feebly.

“I have a meeting at eleven.”

“Ah, yes. Natalie Porter? Right, go upstairs and it’s the second door on the left. He requested a conference room.”

I swallowed and nodded, thanking the receptionist before heading toward the elevator. I didn’t think I could handle a flight of stairs right now. What’s the problem?

Don’t be so nervous.

The reflection in the shiny, metallic walls looked ill. I stood straighter and wiped my hands over my slacks.

Get it together.

Whoever the client was, the agent seemed excited about them. I couldn’t wait to find out who they were.

The elevator doors opened, and a massive seizure gripped my heart. I stepped out and walked down the hall, shoving open the door. I forgot to knock—

A man with black, styled hair and hollow cheeks dressed in a smart, coal-grey suit looked up at me from the table and grinned. It took a moment for me to recognize him as William. He was so stunning that he looked like one of those unapproachable men I sometimes saw walking down the street in the city; the men who made every female head they passed turn their way.

A lightning bolt shot up my arm. All the feelings I’d buried from the other night returned in full force.

“I have a meeting with a client.”

“I know. I’m the client,” he said baldly.

I looked down at his calm, satisfied face and did not understand what he wanted from me. “Is this a game to you?”

“No,” he said in a grim voice. “Please, sit down.”

My whole body was shaking so badly that I couldn't stand. I couldn’t believe the nerve of this guy that he would screw around with my schedule like this just to—what? Didn’t I fail his ridiculous interview? Was it even real?

His face was shrewd as he looked at me. I glanced at the desk, saw my portfolio spread in front of him, and my stomach clenched.

“I wanted to offer you a position as a contractor. It’s a temporary position we need to fill for Luke’s Bed and Breakfast campaign. We will review the sites in person, and if they qualify they’ll join the Pardini hotel chain.”

My ears were ringing. “Why me?”

A flicker of surprise crossed his face. “Because you’re a talented artist. I got in touch with your former employers and went through your designs. You’re perfect for this job.”

Perfect.

“I don’t understand.”

“You’re the only one I can see myself getting along with.” He scanned me, his eyes darting back and forth.

He’s joking, right?

I couldn’t help but laugh. “At dinner the other night, that was ‘getting along’ to you?”

"Compared to the others I interviewed, yeah." He leaned across the table, his black tie dragging over it. "It's a real job, Natalie. I looked at your portfolio, and I was impressed. The job consists of you visiting these inns in the UK, France, and Italy. We need a graphic designer for the pamphlets and mailing lists. As the VP, I need to oversee the campaign and make sure it's running smoothly."

I burned all over. Was he suggesting what I thought he was? So, we’d travel together?

“How much?”

He leaned back and cocked his head, giving me a smile that made my whole body hum with excitement. “Ten thousand dollars for a few weeks seems more than fair. All of your travel arrangements and meals will be taken care of. The contract is short, but if the executives love your work,” he shrugged, “you may be offered a full-time position.”

The executives? You mean, yourself?

I always wanted to go to Italy. He smirked at me, knowing full well he was dangling a fat, juicy carrot in front of my face. I snapped back to myself.

“Why me?”

“I told you why.”

“There are millions of qualified graphic designers. You picked me. A woman you barely know.”

He suddenly reached over and grasped my wrist. An electrical shock traveled up my arm, right into my heart. I didn’t know why I didn’t throw him off. All I could think about was his thumb running up and down, tracing my veins.

“A woman I have the hots for.”

I snatched it away, the huskiness in his voice making my face warm. “What’s your problem?”

“Forgive me for being a red-blooded American who wants to spend three weeks with someone who’s nice to look at.”

“I can’t be the only one you interviewed who was decent-looking.”

His eyes blazed at me. “No, but I like that you don’t suck up. You were so sad at the party. You didn’t even try to hide it. Everyone could see how miserable you were, but you didn’t care.”

I had a flash of anger for the well-dressed, rich man sitting across the table, dishing out judgment toward me. I didn't want to hear this shit. "I know that I'm unhappy, and I don't need to be reminded of it."

He leaned across the table suddenly and grabbed both my arms.

“What’re you doing?”

“Natalie, I’m trying to say that we are alike. You turned me down, and that intrigued me.”

That I could have anything in common with a billionaire was absurd, and yet William wasn’t the polished, put together person I would’ve expected from the Pardini family.

He sat back in his chair and let that sink into my head.

“So is that what this is about? The chase? After one night with me, you’ll be done.”

William stood up from the table with a serene expression on his face, and I wondered if I offended him. "I don't think I'd want just one night from you."

The sincerity in his voice took me by surprise. My heart thumped in my ears as he swept around the table with a smile that made me feel like I was prey. Did I want him?

Hell yes.

Will pulled out a chair and sat close enough for me to see the stubble on his chin. His hand slid across my shoulder to brush my hair from my neck, and I shuddered as if his hand slid up my naked thigh. His deep chuckle sent goose bumps over my skin.

“Are you afraid of me? Or are you afraid of letting go?”

Both. Maybe he wanted someone to fuck on the trip, and maybe he thought I was talented. Did it matter?

Luke’s dire warning against Will echoed in my head.

What demons are you hiding?

“I don’t think getting involved is a good idea.”

“Who said anything about getting involved? It’s a business trip.”

“You’ve made it clear you’re paying me because I’m a pretty face.”

“I’m paying you to perform a job. Whatever happens during the trip is between two consenting adults.”

Could it really be that simple?

Getting caught sleeping with the boss—especially a well-connected man like Will—could ruin my career. So many things could go wrong.

And yet, I wanted to take the risk.

Suddenly, my hands were around his tie, and I was yanking his body forward. His head dipped down, and his dark eyes widened; my head lifted, and that heat I so desperately sought was mine.

What the hell am I doing?

He kissed back hard, his mouth bruising mine. The hunger inside me swallowed him in. His hand swept up the thin fabric of my blouse and grabbed my breast. I gasped into his mouth. I was paralyzed for a moment, seduced by the delicate stroke of his fingers, his lips claiming me as though I belonged to him. My body shivered as I palmed his chest, wanting so badly to run my hands over every crevasse and that gorgeous dent under his throat.

When we broke apart, Will had that blazing look on his face, and he stared at the table as if it would make a good bed. My heart hammered hard enough to make me feel dizzy.

I pushed against his chest. “This is such a bad idea.”

He smirked. “You started it.”

“I’ll do it,” I blurted as he swept down to kiss me again.

“That’s great. We can talk about the details over lunch.”

“Right now?”

He nodded.

I bit my lip hard.

“I can’t. I have to see someone.”

“Who?”

I could feel myself growing hot. “A guy.”

A black look shrouded his face. “What, your ex?” He laughed as he watched my growing shame. Then he shrugged. “I’ll call you later with the details.”

Then he left the room. I stood there, stunned, still staring at the same spot on the wall.

* * *

 “So, how’ve you been doing?”

Ben looked up at me from the round table. His hair had grown in a little. The blonde beard was cut at the same length. He wore the same plaid shirt.

How have I been?

“Well, I got laid off from the aquarium, but I’ve already got a new job.”

His light eyebrows lifted slightly. “Where?”

I wrapped my hands around the mug. “It’s a contract for Pardini Worldwide.”

The blue eyes danced with excitement. “That’s great, Nat!”

My eyes narrowed a bit at the use of my pet name. I didn’t want him to act like nothing was changed between us. “What did you want to talk about?”

He flinched at my tone, and I saw him retreat into himself. "I wanted to talk about us."

“Were you thinking about us during all those dates?”

His eyes widened with shock. Yes, Ben. I noticed the Facebook photos. As if you thought I wouldn’t.

“I was trying to get over you,” he said with an edge in his voice. “Can you blame me for trying to move on?”

Fine. Didn’t mean I couldn’t be pissed about it.

He shook his head. “Maybe I was angry that you’d throw away our relationship over Jessica.”

"I dumped you because you lied to my face. I told you something in confidence, and the first person you blabbed to was a journalist. Then you denied it."

Why did I come here?

"I know, and I'm sorry, but I still can't believe you'd throw everything away after everything we've been through together."

“Actually, I came here to figure out whether I made the right decision. I’m pretty sure I did.”

“Natalie, come on!”

“You’re not sorry. You’re sorry you got caught.”

“Will you please just give us another chance?”

“Nope. Goodbye.”

The disappointment that flared in Ben’s eyes mingled with anger. It surprised me.

And good riddance.