CHAPTER THREE
AS HE PULLED her in close to his chest, Merrily wondered what would happen. Did he plan to take her to bed right now?
She wanted to, she really did, but she’d assumed he’d be working on the door and that they’d have more time to talk first, to get more familiar with each other, to get more...comfortable.
If he meant to do this now, she really needed to give the dogs a quick trip outside first. And she should probably freshen up. Maybe turn down the bed.
It was still light out and while she wasn’t exactly shy, she didn’t know that she wanted to do this in broad daylight—
Brick paused with his mouth very near to hers. “Merrily?”
“Hmm?” Oh, God, the anticipation nearly did her in.
“Tell me what’s wrong.”
Was she that obvious? Should she give him more honesty, or should she brazen it out?
He touched his mouth to hers in a brief, barely-there kiss that had her swaying toward him in a silent plea for more.
“You can tell me anything, okay?” He kissed her jaw, then curled her toes with a soft, damp kiss to her throat. “I want you to know that.”
Surely that wasn’t true. He couldn’t want to hear of her reservations, or the past that had stalled her sexual curiosity, or the broken engagement that had left her humiliated and defeated—
“Tell me,” he insisted while still tasting her skin.
Knowing she had to say something, Merrily drew a breath. “I’m not quite ready yet.”
Leaning back to see her, he asked gently, “For a kiss?”
Was he mocking her? Oh, he’d said that seriously enough, but something close to amusement showed in his dark eyes, and a secret little smile played with the corners of his sexy mouth.
“A kiss is okay,” she assured him. “Great even. It’s just that I—”
“Thank God.” He put his mouth to hers again, this time more firmly, lingering, moving.
Her heart thundered even as he eased away again.
“Okay?”
She nodded fast.
“How about this?” He turned his head a little, moved his lips over hers until he’d nudged them apart, then touched with his tongue.
A rush of heat stole through her. “Yes.” She clutched at his shirt and, lips parted, went to her tiptoes to make that amazing contact with his tongue again. He tasted so good, smelled delicious and felt...amazing.
Suddenly everything moved, and then her back was to the door, Brick pressed up against her, his hands holding her face, his fingers in her hair.
“And this?” he asked in a husky whisper that brushed her damp lips.
She barely had time to note the rough rasp of his voice before he took her mouth in a deep, hot, tongue-twining kiss that left her knees weak and her body taut. Against her breasts, she felt the pounding of his heartbeat, and against her belly... Oh. Hello.
He ended the kiss as if it took a great effort. “Damn.”
She couldn’t seem to get enough oxygen into her starved lungs. She’d known other men—but none like him.
She’d been kissed before—but never like that.
Hands still knotted in his shirt, she whispered, “What’s wrong?” It startled her, hearing that breathy little wisp of sound in place of her own voice.
“Around you, I’m trigger happy.” He kissed her again, short and sweet, then put another kiss to her cheekbone, one to her temple. “What is it about you, Merrily?”
Not understanding, she shook her head. “Trigger happy?”
His half laugh turned into a short groan. “I think about you, and I get a boner. Kissing you damn near puts me over the edge. It’s insane.”
Her heart skipped a beat as she assimilated the meaning behind the words. She’d felt the...boner, of course. No missing that. Was he saying that was unusual for him?
Pressing into him, Merrily relished the feel of his excitement. For her. “Brick...”
Breathing roughly, he caught her hips in his big hands, briefly caressed them, and then held her still. “Sorry, honey, but I think we’re moving too fast.”
No way. That was not something men said. Sure, she’d thought it—at first—but now...
“I don’t want to take advantage.”
“You’re not!”
“And,” he said, stressing the word, “given the way Dundee’s jumping against my ass, I think he either wants out, or he wants you to reassure him that you’re kissing me willingly, not under duress.”
Oh, no. Maintaining her hold on Brick’s shoulders, she leaned to look around his side and saw Dundee on his hind legs, his front paws up on Brick. Her mind went blank. “He, ah, isn’t used to guys being here.”
“Doing this to you. I know.” He gave her a quick kiss and released her. “All the more reason to let up on the gas pedal a little.” He turned to the dog. “So what’s it to be, my man? You need to go out?”
Dundee barked and turned a quick circle.
Dolly joined him.
“Do you have leashes for them, or do you just let them out?”
Still in a hazy fog of lust, Merrily said, “Out.”
“Through the kitchen?”
Why did he have to be so lucid and seemingly unaffected when her legs felt too shaky to support her? “To the backyard, yes.”
Reaching out a hand to her, Brick forced her to give up the support of the front door. “Why don’t we go along, get a breath of fresh air and maybe talk a little?”
“Okay, sure. Why not?” Not like they had anything more pressing going on.
Trying to get it together, she walked beside him, but even the way he curled his big hot hand around her fingers affected her. She thought of those hands, twice the size of her own, touching other places on her body, and for once she frowned at her sweet pets. “That damned doggy door would have come in real handy right about now.”
Brick laughed as he led her and the dogs through the kitchen, to the door and out into the backyard. “Look at it this way,” he said. “If the dogs hadn’t interrupted, I might have taken you right there, standing against the front door. And although I’d have loved it, that’s not how your first time should be.”
He gave her a one-armed hug and, with the dogs dancing around him, continued on into the yard to look around.
Merrily remained where he’d left her, frozen, her heart heavy, her vision narrowing.
So he’d heard the rumors. And believed them.
And now, just like her ex, he wanted to be the first.
Unsure what she should do next, she sank down to sit on the back stoop.
* * *
BRICK TRIED TO use the warm, fresh air to clear his head and regain his control, but he wasn’t sure a frigid shower would even do the trick. He felt obsessed with lust for her, and the need wouldn’t abate until he got his fill.
Damn, but he’d been that close to sealing the deal. And like he’d just told her, that wasn’t what she needed, and ultimately, it wasn’t what he wanted.
Or at least, it wasn’t everything he wanted. Not now.
Now...hell, he just didn’t know. He wanted time and plenty of it.
Dundee did a quick job of sprinkling a tree, then grabbed a stick in his teeth and loped over to him.
Grinning, Brick took it from him, waited while Dundee watched in eager expectation and then threw it. The dog charged after it, ears back, legs stretching out.
Dolly yapped at him, so Brick bent to pet her. “No running for you, huh?” He glanced back at Merrily, but she sat on the edge of the small stoop, her hands clasped together between her knees, her expression distant as she stared off at nothing in particular.
Sexual frustration would be new to her. He should probably offer to help her with that—but no, he couldn’t. Just thinking it—how she’d look while grinding out an orgasm, those sexy little sounds women made, how they smelled and tasted—pushed him dangerously close to the edge.
Tense with desire, he threw the stick for Dundee again, picked up Dolly and joined Merrily in the shade of the overhang.
When she said nothing, he considered how to proceed, but he insisted on honesty always. If he was going to do this—and he most definitely would—then he owed her nothing less.
And if the truth had her backing away? He’d figure it out somehow. “Is it true, then?”
“What? That I’m a virgin?”
Belligerence? Was she touchy about it? He set Dolly down and leaned back on his elbows. Looking out at the yard, Brick took in the fence that would indeed need repairs if the dogs were to be out on their own. He scoped out the rickety wooden privacy wall erected around Tonya’s small back porch to divide her property from Merrily’s. Shading his eyes, he looked up at the large trees that probably dumped a ton of debris on the roof and into the gutters.
Casual as you please, as if it didn’t really matter, he said, “That’s what I meant, yeah.”
“You couldn’t tell?” She made a rude sound. “I’m almost as rare as Bigfoot, you know. In this day and age, there’ve only been a few sightings.”
Brick fought off a grin. “It makes me a little nuts. And it sort of scares me.”
That got her attention. “Scares you?” Another rude sound. “Don’t worry. It’s not contagious.”
He laughed aloud. “Yeah, virginity is a long-lost virtue for me. Hell, I was...mmm, sixteen, I think, when our nineteen-year-old neighbor talked me into skinny dipping with her.” Ha! He knew exactly how old he was—and the girl hadn’t needed persuasion to get him in her pool. “That night, it was almost over for me before it started.”
Curious and still somewhat offended, Merrily watched him. “Virtue?”
Huh. He hadn’t figured on her latching on to that particular part. “It is, you know. Very few people have the fortitude to wait.”
“To wait as long as I have, you mean.” She rubbed her face. “It wasn’t precisely by choice.”
“No?” Hoping to encourage her, Brick put a hand to her narrow back, stroked down her spine and back up again. Through her shirt he felt her warmth and how rigidly she held herself. Trying for subtlety, he nudged her a little closer to him. “I won’t believe the guys weren’t interested. Not looking the way you look. Not with you so sweet.”
She gave a self-deprecating laugh. “My ex-fiancé didn’t think I was sweet. Not at the end.”
“The end of your engagement?”
“Yes.” She dropped her hands and stood, moving away from him. “But you don’t want to hear about all that.”
Okay, so he’d have to work a little harder now. He didn’t mind. On an exaggerated sigh, he stood. “You don’t have any lawn furniture.”
For three heartbeats she said nothing, then she shrugged. “If I’m out here, it’s usually just long enough to let the dogs do their business, and I sit on the stoop.”
“A deck would be nice.” He glanced around. “Probably for Tonya, too.”
Merrily shot him a dirty look. “You should offer to build it for her.”
“I was thinking I might.” It’d give him an opportunity to hang around more. “You’re wrong, you know.”
“About?”
“I want to hear everything that concerns you.” He watched her and saw her surprise. “So tell me, who dumped who in the engagement?”
She took two steps out to the yard but halted. Shoulders stiffening with defiance, she turned to face him again. Her chin lifted. “He dumped me.”
“Seriously? What an idiot.” To keep things casual, Brick went to Dundee and again threw the stick for him. Dolly paid little attention; she found a sun-warmed spot in the grass and sprawled out. “Do you let the cats out, too?”
“Yes. They don’t go far and they always come right back. When I’m home, it’s in and out, in and out. The cats always want to be on the other side of the door.”
Brick looked back at the house, and sure enough, all three cats were there looking out the kitchen window. Cute. He went to the house and opened the door. They bolted out as if expecting him to change his mind at any second. And as Merrily had said, they didn’t go far.
Stan immediately started eating grass.
“He’s like a cow,” Merrily complained with a shake of her head. “He’ll barf that up later, but I gave up trying to get him to quit.”
Eloise joined Dolly in the sun. “Looks like the girls are sticking together.”
“They’re both sun worshipers.”
Tom hung up on the stoop, posture alert as he took in the sight of a few birds in the trees. “Does he ever catch any?”
She shook her head. “So far, no, thank God.”
“What hours are you home?”
The quick change of topic surprised her. She rolled a shoulder. “I have classes in the morning, then work at the diner until six or so. I’m usually home by six-thirty, seven at the latest.”
“What time do your classes start?”
“7:00 a.m.”
Brick whistled low. “Long day.”
“I have all day Sunday free,” she said, then bit her lip. “I mean... I wasn’t suggesting—”
“Good to know.” He wanted to spend some time with her, not just rush through hurried sex that she might not even enjoy. “So you’re free after six-thirty Monday through Saturday and all day Sunday.”
She searched his gaze, wrapped her arms around herself and looked out at the yard again. “He dumped me because I wouldn’t have sex with him.”
Glad that she’d brought it back up, that she wanted to tell him about it, Brick watched her. “Was there a reason why you wouldn’t?”
Nodding, she whispered, “My mother.”
“She needed you with her.” Made sense to him. It was beyond tragic for her, but he knew there wasn’t much he wouldn’t give up for his mom.
Then again, no matter what his obligations, he’d find a way to sneak in a quickie here and there.
Brick shook his head at those wayward thoughts. A world of difference stood between him and Merrily. “You had priorities. I get that.”
“At times, Mom struggled so badly. There wasn’t anyone to help her but me. I was gone enough with school and work. I couldn’t see...” She trailed off.
If she’d been experienced, no doubt she’d have found the time for relief, too. When necessary, it didn’t take long.
Especially for guys.
But for a young, female virgin? A wham-bam incident wouldn’t do, which, again, meant he had to get a handle on his lust. Her first time should be memorable—for the right reasons instead of the wrong ones.
“The timing was off,” she explained. “I should never have gotten involved romantically in the first place. I can’t really blame Kyle. He was young and healthy and energetic. And at first, he did wait, for months and months.”
She sounded far too admiring for Brick’s peace of mind. Was she still hung up on the guy? “I’d say he should have kept waiting, but would that have done any good?”
She shook her head. “Maybe because I knew a normal life wasn’t in the works for me, I couldn’t see getting that intimate.”
How intimate had she gotten? No, maybe he didn’t want to know. “You loved him?”
“Yes.”
A little hard to buy because if she’d loved him, wouldn’t she have found a way? Or maybe she loved him—but didn’t really want him. Was that possible between a man and woman? He adored his sister-in-law, Cinder, but he didn’t have sexual thoughts about her.
And any woman that dated Jesse first was automatically off-limits. He didn’t go where best friends or brothers had gone before. Period. It had nothing to do with the woman, and it didn’t matter how attractive she might be.
“Maybe,” Brick ventured, sharing his thoughts, “you loved him more as a friend than anything else.”
Merrily frowned, then shook her head. “Actually...I don’t know. Maybe I just loved the idea of being in love, the idea of having a marriage and a family and a place of my own.”
She deserved all that and more.
But first she deserved the best sex he could possibly give her.
Without her noticing, Brick got closer again. “You wanted a partner to help you carry the burden.” His hand slid under her hair to cup around the back of her neck. “That’s what he should have been.”
His nearness quickened her breath. Nice.
“Without any...reward at all?”
“You think your company isn’t reward enough?”
“Ha!” She lightly slugged him in the middle. “Like that would be enough for any guy.”
“For any guy in love.... Yeah, I don’t know.” Being in love would only make abstinence more difficult. Hell, Brick wasn’t in love with her, and it ate him up to have to wait.
“Understand, Brick, I didn’t think of my mother as a burden. I loved her so I wanted to be there with her. But yes, it would have been nice to share that responsibility and worry with someone.”
A new thought chewed on his peace of mind. “Do you love him still?”
“No.”
The denial came too quickly to satisfy. Brick tipped up her chin. “You sure?”
Without hesitation, she nodded. “Looking back, I’m not certain exactly what I felt for Kyle even then. I know it hurt a lot when he asked for his ring back. He’d said he loved me, that he wanted to be with me, but he couldn’t deal with everything as it was.” Her mouth twisted. “After he broke things off, he told me that if things ever changed, he wanted to know.”
“Meaning what?” Good God, Brick couldn’t imagine that sentiment. “He wanted you to get in touch if you walked out on your mom?” Like she would ever do such a thing. Hadn’t the guy known her at all?
Lifting one shoulder, Merrily looked away. “Something like that, I guess.”
Something like...when her mother had died? Damn it, he couldn’t help it. He tugged her in closer, tucked her face under his chin and wrapped his arms around her to rock her gently from side to side. “I’m sorry.”
She surprised him by clinging to him. “The funniest part is that not long after he said that, he moved in with another woman.”
Bastard.
She hid her face against his shoulder. “A few months later...my mother took a turn for the worse and she passed away.”
He hugged her tighter still, wishing he could take some of the pain that remained with her.
“Obviously,” Merrily choked out, “I did not call him.”
“Course not.” He kissed the top of her head, her ear. “I’m so damn sorry, honey.”
She drew a slow breath. “I didn’t know what to do with myself after she died. So much of my life was wrapped up into caring for her. My schedule was set up around her needs. I had a few female friends, but no one superclose, so I decided it’d be best to get a fresh perspective on things. I moved here, found a job and got my credits transferred to the new college.”
Brick tangled a hand in her cool, silky hair. “And you decided to lose your virginity.” He realized now that it had been a deliberate choice on her part.
He’d been a deliberate choice—and it humbled him.
“Yes.” She didn’t look at him. “I didn’t expect you to know my entire history, though.”
“Does it matter?”
“Of course it does. Over and over, Kyle told me he wanted to be the first. I think he probably stayed with me as long as he did just hoping to see the big payoff, you know?”
“You keep underestimating yourself, like you think lack of experience is the only appeal.”
A dry, humorless laugh escaped her. “Get real, Brick. For him, at least, it was. That’s why even after he broke things off, he still felt like he’d earned the right.”
“Tough luck for him, then, huh?” Brick wanted no misunderstandings. “Because I’m here now.” And he wasn’t about to budge.
Full of resentment, she said, “For the same reason as Kyle.”
“Don’t compare me to some selfish dick, okay?” He tipped her back so he could see her face. “That’s not me.”
“Right.” Derisive, a little militant, she tried to push away from him. “You’re saying it doesn’t matter to you?”
“Course it does. Most men are possessive by nature, and virgins factor into fantasies even more than porno stars.” He grinned at her. “But aren’t you curious why I said you scare me? Because, lady, seriously, I don’t scare easily.”
Her eyes narrowed. “Okay, not that I’m buying it, but why would I scare you?”
Before he laid it all on her, a bit of forewarning seemed in order. “It’s probably going to piss you off a little.”
Her expression went taut. “Tell me anyway.”
“Promise you’ll hear me out?”
“Depends on what you say, now, doesn’t it?”
The prickly temper only made her all the more adorable to him. Yeah, he was a Neanderthal, but at least he knew it. “All right.” Anticipating her reaction, Brick admitted, “Around you, I have a major loss of control.”
Fascination took some of the heat from her annoyance. “What does that mean exactly?”
“Like I said, you look at me, talk to me, or God forbid you smile, and I react like that testosterone-ridden sixteen-year-old kid again seeing my first naked female. That’s not something I’m used to.”
She studied him. “Later, I’d like to hear more about your first experience. But for now—”
“For now, you need to understand that I also worried about you getting hung up on me.”
“What?”
“If you get too involved, I might break your heart. You’re so damn sweet, Merrily. I really don’t want to put you through that.”
It was almost comical, the sweeping emotions passing over her features—emotions that ended in righteous indignation. Intent on freeing herself from his embrace, she gave him a shove, but Brick held on to her, and when he started laughing, he thought she’d slug him.
“Settle down, okay? I already know I’m an ass.” He caught her hands and held them behind her back. “Surely you see my dilemma, sweet Merrily.”
“No!”
He laughed again. “I’m always up-front with women. I don’t want anyone getting ideas. I like my life the way it is. Sex is just that—sex. Not a commitment.”
“Don’t drive it into the ground, Brick. I get it already.”
He gave her a laughing smooch on her pinched mouth. “The idea of your virginity has been both a lure and a concern.”
“Oh, my God. You are so conceited!”
“I know.” He nuzzled her in closer, kissing her ear, that special place where her throat met her shoulder. “But I swear, when it comes to sex, I have good reason.”
She went still, then soft in his arms. “Lacking in modesty, too.”
Yet she sounded intrigued. He hid his smile against her cheek. “So here’s what I propose.”
She groaned.
“No, not a marriage proposal, so stop all the melodrama.” Brick couldn’t remember ever being mired in such a powerful combo of lust and humor. It was unique.
She was unique.
He carried her hands back up to his neck and slid his hands down to the small of her back. “For now, why don’t I make a strategic retreat? You can have the night to think about things, to decide if you still want me—and if so, I promise you won’t regret it. But go into it with your eyes wide open.”
“Meaning sex and only sex?”
“Sex and conversation and a few laughs. Some good times.” He wanted all that because he didn’t want her to have regrets. “I’ll make it good for you, Merrily. Better than good. You have my word.” Then he rethought that and added, “Well, maybe not the first time. I have a feeling that once I get your panties off, it’s going to be a very close thing.”
Her mouth fell open, then snapped shut as her face went up in flames.
He remained serious. He wanted her to believe him. “After that, every time after that, count on loving it. And that’s not an idle brag, okay? I do know what I’m doing.”
The heat extended into her gaze. Her lips parted. She nodded. “Okay.”
Pretty sure he’d already won her over, Brick added, “But understand that I’m not the type to settle down anytime soon.”
“Good.”
“Good?”
She nodded. “My life has recently taken a dramatic change. I want to live for a while without serious restrictions—and you already said you’re possessive, so you would certainly be a restriction.”
“Yeah, probably.” He knew himself well enough to know that once he fell in love, he’d probably be nearly unbearable. Luckily, he had no intentions of falling in love, and she didn’t want that anyway. Did she? “You’re okay with that?”
She nodded. “Once I no longer have that stupid badge of innocence, I won’t have to worry what motivates other guys.”
Other guys. His good mood slipped. “You’re planning ahead, are you?”
“Absolutely.”
Damn. He felt...insulted. Hearing her talk about a new life that didn’t involve him sort of burned his ass. He hadn’t had her yet, so he damn straight didn’t want to think about some future bozo getting down and dirty with her.
“So.” She smoothed a small hand over his chest. “What do we do now?”
“I’ll come by tomorrow with Jesse and we’ll switch out the doors.” Jesse’s help wasn’t necessary, but hey, he had a pleasant surprise for his friend and couldn’t wait to share it with him. “Sunday I can put in the pet opening. After that, you and I can get busy.”
“You’re talking two days from now?”
She sounded as forlorn as he felt over the wait. But he had to be fair to her even if it killed him. And waiting until Sunday meant she’d then have the whole day free—which meant he’d have all day to really enjoy himself.
“Two days of kissing, maybe a little touching—” God, he’d never survive this “—getting more familiar and after that, after you’ve had plenty of time to think things over, you can decide what you want.”
With any luck, and a little persuasion on his part, she’d want him, only him, for a good long stretch of sexual indulgence.
The way he felt right now, he couldn’t accept any other outcome.