“You’ve really never been here?” Blakely asked.

“Nope,” Verna responded as she looked around Mason’s Bar & Grille. “It felt a little too much like sleeping with the enemy, and besides, I was usually so tired that I never felt up to coming out. And”—she made an ugly face as she glanced at the neon sign in the window—“that superfluous ‘e’ in “grille” is just annoying. Didn’t want to spend my money in a place that put on that kind of airs.”

Blakely and Ariel laughed, as did Amanda Adkins, a local elementary school teacher and one of Ariel’s good friends, who’d decided to join them. Blakely shook her head at Verna.

“Well,” Blakely said after their laughter had died down, “I’m glad you could get past your reservations and decided to come out. I was going a little stir-crazy,” she said.

“Me too,” Ariel chimed in. “My mother-in-law has Dani tonight, and I couldn’t miss the chance to spend an evening not watching DVR’ed episodes of Doc McStuffins.”

They all laughed again and headed to an open table, and after ordering a round of drinks, Verna took the opportunity to look around. Love’s Cafeteria was the most popular breakfast and lunch place in Thornehill Springs, but Mason’s was by far the most popular dinner spot. There were other restaurants in town, but in addition to food, Mason’s had a big bar and a few pool tables and served as the gathering spot for those who wanted to get out without driving to Charlotte.

It was true that Verna was usually tired in the evening and that her parents, her father especially, would view it as a hostile act for her to patronize another establishment, but there was another reason she’d never ventured in. Silly as it was, between the military guys and the popular crowd that hung out there, Mason’s had always had an aura of coolness that made her uncomfortable. She’d been certain that should she walk through those doors, everyone would stop and laugh, or God forbid, some kindly patron would gently pat her on the hand as she explained that people like Verna had no place here.

She cringed even thinking about it, upset with herself for letting fear rule her for so long. But her presence here was just another thing that she could thank Joe for. They hadn’t talked about the restaurant specifically, but she could easily picture his face as she explained her fear, see that silly-Verna head shake that said she was doing something stupid and preventing herself from living her life to the fullest, and knew that he’d have her here every day until she got it through her thick head that this was just a place, the patrons just people, the fear and discomfort she may have felt a creation of her own mind.

That she hadn’t been able to fully apply his real and pretend admonitions to her everyday life was disheartening, but she was getting better all the time, as proved by her presence here. And she had to say, it seemed a fun, lively place, but it was just a restaurant and no one here was any better than her.

She smiled at the thought and then looked over at Blakely, who’d tapped her on the shoulder.

“So what’s got you so happy?” she asked again, before taking the last sip of her good-enough daiquiri.

“I don’t know; I just feel…good, happy. Like maybe I’ve finally gotten a handle on things and maybe I can make something out of what has been a pretty pathetic life so far.”

She had Joe to thank for that, though she’d never admit it out loud, especially not to him.

“Your life has been anything but pathetic, Verna, and maybe one day you’ll see that, but I’m happy that you’re feeling good. Now if I could get you to stop being so hard on yourself, we might be cooking with gas.”

“Toast to that,” Ariel said, and they all raised their drinks.

A few hours and a few daiquiris later, Verna felt as good as she could remember. Amanda, a shy-seeming thing, hadn’t moved an inch, but Ariel, free from the responsibility of motherhood for the evening, had really let go, dancing with anyone brave enough to ask and generally having a good old time. Even Blakely had relaxed, going so far as to remove her jacket and unbutton the top two buttons on her blouse, something that Verna had teased her about. She’d even accepted a dance from a terrified-looking local who’d claimed to have gone to high school with her.

Alone at the table with Amanda for a moment, Verna used the time to just soak in the atmosphere. She was out for a normal evening like a normal person, and the insecurity and shame that had kept her paralyzed were nowhere to be found. She didn’t even mind that no one had asked her to dance. Putting aside the fact that she hated dancing, she didn’t need validation from these people. Joe had proven that she was desirable, and if she was good enough for him, she had to be doubly good enough for anyone else.

The sound of men’s laughter drew her gaze to a table to the left of the dining room, and when she looked over, her heart stuttered at the sight of Joe, her gaze finding him unerringly in the group of six or seven other men that he was with. For a moment, she wondered if she’d imagined him. The hunger for him that always seemed present had, as expected, been present tonight as well, and it could be that the daiquiris and happiness that were currently coursing through her system had her seeing things. But then he gave a slight nod, and she knew he was real. Quashing the inclination to run over there, she instead smiled back and returned the nod. He was out with friends, and it wouldn’t be fair to try to take his attention, and besides, so was she, and she couldn’t ever let herself rely on Joe as a crutch. Still, seeing him had been a thrill that was a perfect cap to the night.

“Is he your boyfriend?” Amanda asked, her voice almost a whisper.

She looked over at the other woman.

“Who?” she responded, though she knew exactly who Amanda was referring to.

“That Army guy. He’s been looking over here all night.”

“Navy,” Verna said automatically, and then she smiled. “No, he’s just…” She trailed off, searching for the right word for what Joe was to her. “A friend.” The word didn’t even begin to touch what they shared, but it seemed fitting enough.

Amanda nodded but didn’t say anything else, and neither did Verna, but a stupid idea had gotten stuck in her head.

When Blakely and Ariel returned, Amanda asked, “Are we ready to leave?”

Ariel nodded. “Oh yes. I haven’t been out this late in five years, and I know the little one isn’t going to sleep till eleven so Mommy can recover.”

“Nope, in fact, she’ll probably be up extra early,” Verna said.

“Don’t wish that on me, evil woman,” her new friend said, and then she smiled. “But it’s fine if she is. I needed this, and I’m glad I had the chance to hang with you guys.”

“Agreed. Let me run to the ladies’, and then we’ll get out of here, okay?” Verna said.

After the chorus of yeses, she stood and weaved her way through the tables, headed to the ladies’ room, the circuitous path taking her close to the table where Joe sat with his companions. She looked at the table quickly and just as quickly looked away. Maybe she should go over and say hi. They were neighbors after all, and what was the harm in a simple, friendly hello? But on the other hand, she didn’t want to intrude, even accidentally, on his night. Still as she followed the circuitous path between the tables—she definitely would have rearranged them to make the traffic flow more smoothly—she found herself close to Joe’s group. At that point, it would almost be rude to not say something.

So she walked over, a smile plastered on her face, and then stopped next to Joe. He wore a smile of his own, one that was his but that seemed strained. And he’d given no indication that he saw her standing next to him. Before she could think, she reached out and tapped his shoulder as she had what seemed like a million times before, her smile faltering when he flinched.

“Hey, Joe,” she said, hating the timidity in her voice.

He said nothing, didn’t even spare her a glance.

“A friend of yours, Joe?” one of the others said around a smirk to a chorus of laughter in response. She didn’t know who’d spoken and didn’t want to turn her head to find out. If she did, she might miss some clue as to why Joe wasn’t speaking to her or looking at her. The moment stretched, each second that passed more excruciating than the one that had come before it.

And then Joe picked up his glass and took a sip, and the reality of the moment crashed through her like a shot. She tried to deny it, grasped for any other explanation, but there was none. For an instant, she worried that she might lose the contents of her stomach from the intensity of her embarrassment, but she managed to choke back the bile that burned her throat. And then she found a way to turn and propel herself toward the bathroom, keeping her from hearing the laughter—his laughter—as she moved.

She looked back at the table before she could stop herself and saw every eye—except for Joe’s—on her. There was no doubt who they’d been laughing at. The expression on the men’s faces, some amused, others slightly embarrassed and apologetic, Joe’s completely blank, only confirmed the truth.

And that truth shattered her.

Quickly, she looked away and focused on finding the bathroom without making a bigger fool of herself.

When she got inside, she stood next to the door, trying to make her lungs work normally, while her mind processed what had just happened. It wasn’t working. She was light-headed, stunned, and her mind kept trying to put another spin on it, come up with another explanation for what she’d heard, for what had happened.

There wasn’t one.

It would have been kinder if he’d insulted her. But to do that, to deny her very existence, to treat her as if she were nothing… She couldn’t decide whether it mattered that he’d done so after he himself had insisted with his words she was worthwhile, even when she would have denied it, after he’d so lovingly showed it with his body and his actions. But she couldn’t think of a time when she’d hurt more than she did in this moment, the tight pull in her chest making it feel impossible to breathe.

“Is anyone—Oh, Verna, hey, you ready?” Blakely asked as she pushed open the door.

Apparently, Verna had been in her own world long enough for Blakely to come looking for her. She took a couple of slow, deep breaths and tried to keep a tight rein on her emotions.

“Yes, let’s go,” Verna said, her voice sounding far away in her own ears.

Blakely looked at her, the other woman’s sharp gaze roaming over her face. Verna prayed she wouldn’t ask any questions; she wasn’t up to talking. Thankfully, after another long, assessing gaze, Blakely nodded and stepped aside, allowing Verna to exit. As they walked back to their table, Verna refused to look over at Joe. She hoped her face was impassive and didn’t betray the fact that hurt gripped her so tight that her lungs didn’t want to expand, that the pain had left her both hollow and full with anguish she had never imagined, but she almost didn’t care. The only thing that mattered was getting the fuck out of there without losing her shit.

Somehow, through Blakely’s efforts she guessed, they were soon loaded into a taxi, with Verna’s house as the first stop.

“Vern, we’re here,” Blakely said.

She hadn’t even noticed they’d moved, but she nodded and grabbed the door handle, preparing to leave. Blakely’s hand on her forearm stopped her.

“Call us, call me, if you need me,” she said.

Verna nodded and whispered a good-night before she walked up the driveway and unlocked the door. She waved out at the cab once she’d stepped in and after it pulled off, she closed the door and relocked it.

And then, as she leaned against the front door, she let the tears come.