She needed to talk to someone.

Seeing Ash after all these years had rattled her more than she wanted to admit. It felt like forever since he’d been home; she’d started to think he’d never return. Had actually hoped for that very thing. The last few years she’d gone days without thinking of him constantly, until she met up with Quinn or ran into Leia and then the memories would hurtle back like a charging grizzly bear.

It was ridiculous that she hadn’t gotten over him by now. No one found the love of their life at fourteen.

They’d dreamed and planned for a future together. A future of traveling the world, getting married, having children, growing old, and dying in each other’s arms. Then her mom had fallen sick and reality pulverized those dreams into dust. To this day, she couldn’t picture herself or her life with anyone else other than Ash. The only man she’d ever kissed had been Ash Bleu.

Maybe that was the problem.

Kennadee wasn’t available because of her EMT training in Fairbanks this week, and Sorene didn’t have the time to make the trek into the big city. Besides, Catronia was the more experienced of the three of them.

She hated to think of how experienced Zoe might be at her young age. A needle of worry over her little sister threaded in. Where had she gone wrong with her?

That was another problem to deal with later. Right now, she needed advice. She fished her phone out of her overall pocket and called Catronia.

Catronia answered on the third ring, sounding out of breath. “Heart Springs Eternal Spa and Resort.”

“Hey, Cat, do you have time for lunch today?”

“Sorene?” Disbelief sounded in Cat’s voice.

“Yes, it’s me.”

“When do you ever take lunch?”

“I eat lunch.”

“On the run, maybe. You never take time to go out for lunch.

“I need some advice,” she admitted, the words strained. She hated asking anyone for help, preferring to figure things out on her own.

“With Zoe? The best thing you can do with her is let her make her own mistakes. Life is the best teacher, as you’ve always counseled me.”

“It’s not about Zoe.” She paused and almost decided to end the conversation. But the memory of Ash’s kiss had her blurting out. “Ash Bleu is back in town.”

“Holy shit.” The sound of rustling pages carried over the line. “I can meet you at Pulse in twenty.”

“Perfect.”

“You okay, Sorene?”

“Not really.” She hated how small her voice sounded.

“Hang in there. We’ll figure out what to do about him. Don’t worry.”

“Thanks, Cat.” They disconnected and Sorene locked up her tools in the cabin and then drove to Pulse, the bistro cafe along the main artery of town. The sign overhead had a heart symbol intersected in the middle by an EKG graph.

Sorene arrived first and grabbed a table in the back corner to wait for Catronia. She didn’t have to wait long. Cat breezed in, graceful and beautiful with her cinnamon-colored hair, sleek black yoga outfit, which she’d paired with stylish boots, and a long, black coat that tucked in at the waist and flared at the hips.

Cat shed her coat, peppering Sorene with questions, not leaving time for Sorene to answer any of them. “When did he get back in town? Why is he here? When did you see him and what the hell happened between you?” Cat slid into the chair and grabbed Sorene’s hand. “Is he still as hot as he was in high school? Tell me, he gained a bunch of weight, has a beer belly, and lost all his hair.”

Sorene surprised herself, laughing over the picture Cat painted. “If only. He’s hotter than he ever was.” Too hot. “Scorching.”

“Oh no.”

“Right? Is there no justice in the world?”

“Not when it comes to men, apparently. Tell me everything.”

Sorene relayed the events of her morning and her encounter with Ash.

“Oh, that’s going to be uncomfortable. Have you told Dad yet? I’m sure he’ll take you off the lake house.”

“I don’t want to be taken off the lake house. I just don’t want to work with Ash.” She dragged in a deep breath for strength, and then leaned forward. Cat did the same. “He kissed me,” she whispered.

“Tell me you kicked him in the balls?”

“Not exactly.” She’d been closer to cupping them then kicking them. She hadn’t even thought of it. That spoke volumes of where her head was or wasn’t. It had been lassoed by her heart, leaving her emotions in charge. Never a good thing.

“So, how was the kiss?”

Sorene moaned and covered her face with her hands.

“Right, you wouldn’t have asked me to lunch if it had sucked.”

The waitress arrived to take their order, and Sorene sat up in her chair trying to look as though she were enjoying a casual lunch with her sister. No need to add material to the gossip vein. They each opted for the heart-healthy salad and two defibrillator coffees. Lord knew she needed caffeine today.

“You have a problem,” Cat said when the waitress left to fill their orders.

“I know. So, what do I do?” It killed her to have to ask that. Her experience when it came to men measured zilch, after all, it only included one man.

Ashworth Bleu.

“When was the last time you were on a date?” Cat asked.

“Seriously, you have to ask?”

“Don’t tell me you haven’t dated since Ash? Good God, does that means you haven’t—”

“Shh,” Sorene hissed. “We don’t need the whole town to know my sex history or lack thereof.”

“Wow, this explains a lot about why you’re so uptight all the time.”

“I am not.”

“Are too.”

“This is pointless. I didn’t come here to argue.”

“Right. Sorry.” Thinking, Cat tapped her fingers on the table top until Sorene wanted to scream. “You can’t let Ash know you’ve been pining for him all this time. A man will take that information and exploit the hell out of it.”

“Not to mention, it makes me look pathetic,” Sorene grumbled.

“Not pathetic. You’ve had a lot on your plate the last ten years, what with raising us and taking care of Dad.”

The waitress returned with their salads and coffee, and they suspended conversation until she retreated out of earshot.

Sorene picked up her fork and then set it back down. She was too worked up to eat. Instead, she reached for her coffee and took a sip. “All Ash has to do is ask around and anyone would tell him I haven’t been painting the town.” Goodnight, she led a boring life, while Ash had traveled the world, experiencing so many wonders, so many other women.

“That’s what you need to do!” Cat’s face lit up. “You can’t stay at home, you need to get out there. What about Bart? He’s been asking you out for years. Give him a call.”

“I couldn’t do that.” The very thought had the coffee attacking her stomach lining as though she’d swallowed acid.

“Yes, you could. He’d jump at the chance to go out with you.”

“I don’t call boys.”

“Boys?” Cat laughed. “Sorene, you aren’t in high school anymore. They’re men, and it’s okay to call one nowadays. Hell, you could even send him a text.”

“That’s so impersonal. Still. It isn’t me. And Bart is too…” She couldn’t think of the right word.

“Virile, intense, zealous?”

“Macho.”

“Which is why he’s perfect. You need to dive into the deep end of the sexual pool. You have years to catch up on. Think of the orgasms you’ve denied yourself.” Cat shuddered. “It’s unconscionable.”

“I’m not ready for sex.” An ache low in her belly begged to differ. “Can I start with kissing?”

“Always start with kissing and great kissing leads to sex.”

That she didn’t need explained.

If Ash hadn’t called a halt to their kiss, her dry spell would have been over fast. She hadn’t been in any frame of mind to push him away at the time and she doubted she would have. Which didn’t speak highly of her willpower when it came to him.

She leaned forward again and whispered, “I’ve only kissed Ash.”

“Good God.” Cat shook her head in disbelief. “You’ve lived all these years like a nun. We need to get you out there. Here’s what we’re going to do. Tonight, you and I are going out on the prowl. We’ll get you dolled up and hit the Pump House for happy hour. No objections,” Cat said when Sorene opened her mouth to do just that. “I’ll be your wingman, er, wing-woman, so you don’t have to worry that things will get out of control. We all know how you like a controlled environment.”

“Hey, that’s not fair.” She needed a controlled environment to handle everything that crowded her plate.

“It’s past time you cut loose and embraced the wild side of your nature. And yes, you have one. You can’t be a Wilde without that streak running through you like lava. We just need to coax it to the surface.”